TheTourist90
50 reviews liked by TheTourist90
Portal 2
2011
One of the few games I can say you beat with the power of cum.
He's just like me fr!
Swooning Over Stans
2018
Why is this good... why must it be good... why a dating simulator involving cartoon old men must be so endearing and fun and engaging and lovable... i hate it here let me OUT
Amorous
2018
I 100% this game after like 5 years... this is not a bad game at all and I'm forced to defend it with my life.
Garten of Banban isn't real, it is the parents
Super Mario World
1990
I remember playing this before the divorce, the wife said that I was being "cruel" when I'd ditch Yoshi in a pit to make it to the end of a level. I'm "cruel" for doing that, but she's "totally justified" in taking 800 bucks a month for a son that isn't mine, I swear. Bitch.
>enemy commander shows up
>"he he ho ho i'm gonna kill you >:)c"
>casts super hell shadow pain missile at him
>enemy commander, dying, opening up a heart shaped locket: "now I, as a single father who is very well loved by their local community, won't be able to pay for my blind child's cancer medicine :("
>enemy commander yelps, falls over face first and drops a potato sack
>1.5 seconds of silence
>"CONGRATULATIONS" in bold and golden words pops up on screen
>the entire Cincinnati Orchestra puts their whole pussy into playing a fanfare tune
>a whole ass audience worth of people scream in applaud at the loot you stole off his corpse
good game
>"he he ho ho i'm gonna kill you >:)c"
>casts super hell shadow pain missile at him
>enemy commander, dying, opening up a heart shaped locket: "now I, as a single father who is very well loved by their local community, won't be able to pay for my blind child's cancer medicine :("
>enemy commander yelps, falls over face first and drops a potato sack
>1.5 seconds of silence
>"CONGRATULATIONS" in bold and golden words pops up on screen
>the entire Cincinnati Orchestra puts their whole pussy into playing a fanfare tune
>a whole ass audience worth of people scream in applaud at the loot you stole off his corpse
good game
Nekojishi
2017
This review contains spoilers
Would be good if the game was playable
Also I'm officially nuking Toyota after playing this shit
Also I'm officially nuking Toyota after playing this shit
This review contains spoilers
Chipomat saying that the smell of wood is ''arousing'' made me feel some kind of way... 🥵🥵🥵 hell yeah metal daddy
Plants vs. Zombies
2009
Dares to ask the question - “What if the last of us was good?”
