Alright, gather 'round, 'cause we're diving headfirst into the dumpster fire that is "Batman: Arkham Knight." Strap in, folks, 'cause this one's gonna be a wild fucking ride.

Now, if you've been following along with our journey through the Arkham series, you know we've seen some shit. From the highs of "Arkham City" to the lows of "Arkham Origins," we thought we'd seen it all. But then along comes "Arkham Knight" to slap us in the face with disappointment.

Let's start with the story, or lack thereof. We've gone from the dark, gritty narratives of the previous games to this convoluted mess that's about as coherent as a drunk guy trying to explain string theory. And don't even get me started on the Red Hood. I mean, seriously, who thought it was a good idea to turn one of Batman's most badass enemies into a whiny little bitch? "Oh, why didn't you kill the Joker sooner, Batman?" Give me a fucking break.

And speaking of breaks, let's talk about the Batmobile. Oh boy, where do I even begin? Controlling that tank is like trying to navigate rush hour traffic in a clown car – frustrating as hell and ultimately pointless. And don't even get me started on those godawful tank battles. It's like the developers saw "Transformers" and said, "Hey, let's make a game out of this!" Spoiler alert: it fucking sucks.

But hey, let's not forget about Jason Todd, the world's biggest crybaby. Seriously, dude, get over yourself. Batman didn't kill the Joker because he's not a goddamn psychopath like you. Maybe if you spent less time whining and more time honing your ninja skills, you wouldn't have ended up as a second-rate villain.

In the end, "Batman: Arkham Knight" is like that friend who promises you a night of wild partying but ends up dragging you to a shitty dive bar instead. It's disappointing, it's frustrating, and it's about as enjoyable as a root canal. So do yourself a favor and skip this one – Gotham deserves better, and so do you.

Now, if you thought the story was a mess, just wait until we get into the goddamn dialogue.

Let's start with Jason Todd, aka the Red Hood, aka the whiniest little shit Gotham has ever seen. Seriously, this guy's got a bone to pick with Batman bigger than the Batmobile itself. Every time he opens his mouth, it's like nails on a chalkboard – "Why didn't you kill him sooner, Batman?" Oh, I don't know, maybe because I had other shit to deal with, like saving the goddamn city?

And speaking of saving the city, let's talk about the Batmobile. Oh boy, what a fucking nightmare. I swear, trying to drive that tank is like trying to parallel park a goddamn semi-truck in rush hour traffic. And don't even get me started on the Riddler races – who the hell thought those were a good idea?

But hey, it's not all bad, right? I mean, at least we get to see Batman brooding in his cave for the millionth time. Oh joy, another night of staring at the Batcomputer and contemplating my tragic existence. Riveting stuff, really.

In the end, "Batman: Arkham Knight" is like that one guy at the party who just won't shut the fuck up about his problems. We get it, Batman, you're tortured and brooding and all that shit. But guess what? So are we, after playing this goddamn game.

Alright, folks, let's talk about "Batman: Arkham Origins." Now, this game may not be the holy grail of the Arkham series, but hey, it's like that sidekick who's always there to lend a hand – maybe not as flashy as the main hero, but damn reliable.

So, picture this: Gotham City, covered in snow like it's auditioning for a winter wonderland. I mean, come on, who knew Batman was so into seasonal aesthetics? I guess even superheroes need to get into the holiday spirit, right?

And speaking of the Caped Crusader, he's back and broodier than ever. Seriously, you'd think with all those gadgets and muscles, he'd lighten up a bit, but nope, still as gloomy as ever. Hey, at least he's consistent, right?

But let's get down to the real meat of the game – the story. It's like a rollercoaster ride through Gotham's underbelly, complete with twists, turns, and enough drama to make a soap opera jealous. And hey, who doesn't love a good soap opera?

And then there are the villains. Oh boy, the villains. From the Joker to Bane to Black Mask, it's like a who's who of Gotham's most wanted. It's like the supervillain version of a high school reunion – except with more explosions and fewer awkward conversations.

In the end, "Batman: Arkham Origins" may not be the hero we deserve, but it's the hero we need right now. It's like that reliable sidekick who always has your back, even if they're not the one in the spotlight. So, grab your cape and cowl, folks – it's time to save Gotham once again.

Alright, ladies, let's keep this Bat-train rolling with "Batman: Arkham City." Now, if you thought Arkham Asylum was the shit, just wait 'til you get a load of this.

First off, Arkham City? It's Gotham City cranked up to eleven, with all the chaos and mayhem you could ever fucking want. From the slums to the skyscrapers, this place is like a playground for criminals, and you're right in the goddamn middle of it.

And Batman? Oh, honey, they've outdone themselves with the Dark Knight in this one. The gadgets? Fucking amazing. The combat? Smooth as silk. And the detective work? It's like playing Nancy Drew with a cape and cowl.

But let's talk about the real star of the show – the freedom. You're not just some damsel in distress – you're the goddamn Batman, free to roam the streets, beat up bad guys, and just be an all-around badass. It's like being a kid in a candy store, except the candy is justice, and you're handing it out in fistfuls.

And the villains? Girl, let me tell you, they're off the charts. From the Joker to Two-Face to Catwoman, every villain in Batman's rogue gallery is here, and they're all out for blood. The boss fights? Epic as hell. The showdowns? Intense doesn't even begin to cover it.

In the end, "Batman: Arkham City" isn't just a game – it's a goddamn experience. It's a love letter to Batman and everything he stands for, and let me tell you, it's the best damn superhero game ever made. Period.

Now, listen up, 'cause I fucking love Batman. He's my goddamn hero, and this game? It's like a wet dream for Bat-fans like me.

First off, the atmosphere? Fucking nailed it. Arkham Island feels like a goddamn haunted house, with danger lurking around every corner. You can practically taste the fear in the air, and let me tell you, it tastes fucking delicious.

And Batman himself? Holy shit, they got it right. From the gadgets to the combat to the goddamn detective work, playing as the Dark Knight is like a goddamn adrenaline rush. And Kevin Conroy's voice? It's like fucking music to my ears, man.

But let's talk about the real star of the show – the gameplay. It's like a goddamn ballet of violence, with Batman dishing out justice left and right like a goddamn boss. The combat is fucking smooth as butter, and the stealth? It's like playing a goddamn game of cat and mouse with the bad guys.

And the level design? Don't even get me started. It's like a goddamn maze of secrets and surprises, with hidden goodies just waiting to be uncovered. And the story? It's like a goddamn rollercoaster ride of twists and turns, with Batman at the goddamn wheel.

In the end, "Batman: Arkham Asylum" is more than just a goddamn game – it's a goddamn masterpiece. It's a fucking love letter to Batman and everything he stands for, and let me tell you, it's an experience you won't soon fucking forget.

This game? It's like a dark and twisted love letter to despair, sadness, and melancholy. And you know what? I fucking love every bit of it.

From the moment you step foot into Yharnam, you're hit with this overwhelming sense of dread and despair. It's like the whole world is crumbling around you, and you're just along for the goddamn ride. But you know what? That's what makes it so fucking captivating.

The aesthetic of "Bloodborne" is like nothing else. It's this dark, gothic nightmare that's equal parts horrifying and beautiful. Every fucking corner you turn, every goddamn enemy you face, it's like stepping into a painting of hell itself. And you know what? I wouldn't have it any other fucking way.

But let's talk about the gameplay. Oh baby, the gameplay. It's like a fucking dance of death, man. The combat is fast, frenetic, and oh so satisfying. Every swing of your weapon, every dodge, every fucking visceral attack – it's like poetry in motion.

And the level design? Don't even get me started. It's like a fucking maze of madness, with secrets around every goddamn corner. Exploring Yharnam is like peeling back the layers of a fucked-up onion, revealing more and more of its twisted secrets with each step you take.

In the end, "Bloodborne" is more than just a goddamn game – it's an experience. It's a journey through darkness, despair, and fucking madness, and let me tell you, it's one hell of a ride.

(where is the pc version??)

It's like finding a fucking hidden gem years after everyone else has already discovered it. I mean, where the hell was I when this masterpiece dropped?

First things fucking first, let's talk about the story. Holy shit, the story. It's like a goddamn punch in the gut, man. From the very fucking start, you're thrown into this post-apocalyptic world that's so goddamn bleak and brutal, it'll make your head spin. And let me tell you, I played this game in 2020, years after it fucking came out, and I still didn't know a goddamn thing about it. Not one fucking spoiler. And thank fuck for that, 'cause experiencing this shit blind was like a religious fucking experience.

And the characters? Oh baby, don't even get me started on the fucking characters. Joel, Ellie, Tess, Bill... these motherfuckers feel like real people, man. You get attached to them, you care about them, and when shit goes down, you feel it deep in your fucking soul.

Now, let's talk gameplay. It's fucking tight, man. The combat, the stealth, the goddamn scavenging – it's all so goddamn polished, it's like playing a fucking movie. And don't even get me started on the goddamn Clickers. Those fuckers scared the shit outta me more times than I care to admit.

Of course, "The Last of Us" ain't perfect. Some assholes might find the pacing a bit slow, or the ending a bit too goddamn ambiguous. And yeah, the multiplayer is a bit hit or miss. But you know what? None of that shit fucking matters in the grand scheme of things.

In the end, "The Last of Us" is more than just a fucking game – it's a goddamn masterpiece. It's a fucking journey through the depths of human emotion, a testament to the power of storytelling in fucking video games. And let me tell you, it's an experience you won't soon fucking forget.

Alright, strap yourselves in, 'cause we're diving deep into "The Last of Us Part II." This game? It's a fucking emotional rollercoaster that'll leave you reeling for days.

Let's start with the story, shall we? Holy shit, the story. It's like a goddamn gut punch after gut punch, hitting you right in the feels when you least expect it. I'm talking tears, man. I cried more times than I can count during this game, and I ain't ashamed to admit it. It's just that fucking powerful.

And don't even get me started on the characters. Ellie, Joel, Abby... they're like family by the time you're done with this game. You feel every goddamn emotion they feel, from rage to heartbreak to fucking hope. It's a testament to the writing and the voice acting that they feel so goddamn real.

Now, let's talk gameplay. Oh baby, the gameplay. It's like fucking butter, smooth as hell and oh so satisfying. Whether you're sneaking past infected or blowing shit up with human enemies, every fucking encounter is tense as fuck and keeps you on the edge of your goddamn seat.

Of course, "The Last of Us Part II" ain't perfect. Some motherfuckers might find the pacing a bit slow, or the violence a bit too fucking much. And yeah, this game goes to some dark-ass places – like, darker than the fucking abyss. But you know what? That's part of what makes it so goddamn compelling.

In the end, "The Last of Us Part II" is more than just a fucking game – it's an experience. It's a goddamn journey through a world torn apart by tragedy and violence, but also one filled with moments of fucking beauty and grace. And let me tell you, it's a journey you won't soon fucking forget.

Alright, let's talk about "Bully". Now, this game? It's like that rebel kid in school who's always causing trouble but deep down, you know he's got a good heart.

First things first, the setting. Bullworth Academy is like a character in itself – it's this vibrant, living world filled with students, teachers, and all kinds of shenanigans. From the classrooms to the football field, there's always something going on.

And then there's Jimmy Hopkins, our protagonist. He's not your typical hero – he's more of an anti-hero, really. But man, is he fun to play as. Whether you're pulling pranks, getting into fistfights, or just exploring the town, there's never a dull moment with Jimmy around.

But what really sets "Bully" apart is its open-world gameplay. You're free to roam around Bullworth, taking on missions, making friends (or enemies), and just causing chaos wherever you go. It's like Grand Theft Auto, but in a high school setting – and believe me, it works.

Of course, it's not all fun and games. "Bully" tackles some pretty heavy themes, like bullying, cliques, and even violence. And while it doesn't always handle them perfectly, it's refreshing to see a game that's not afraid to tackle tough subjects.

Now, is "Bully" perfect? Nah, far from it. The controls can be a bit wonky at times, and some of the missions feel a bit repetitive. But at the end of the day, it's the characters, the setting, and the sheer sense of mischief that make "Bully" a game worth playing.

Undertale, huh? What a trip, man. I mean, it's something else.

It's like that book you pick up on a whim, thinking it'll be just another story, but then it turns out to be this epic adventure that totally blows your mind.

First off, the graphics? Retro vibes all the way, but somehow it works. It's like taking a trip down memory lane, back to the days of pixel art and 8-bit music.

And the characters? Don't even get me started. From the wise-cracking skeleton, Sans, to the motherly Toriel, each one feels like they jumped straight out of a classic RPG.

But what really gets me about Undertale is the story. I mean, sure, it starts off pretty straightforward – you fall into this underground world full of monsters – but then it takes these crazy twists and turns that you never see coming.

And don't even get me started on the choices. Every decision you make has consequences, man. It's like life, you know? One wrong move and BAM, you're facing a totally different outcome.

Of course, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. Some people might find the graphics a bit too retro, or the combat system a bit too simplistic. And yeah, the game can get pretty dark at times, but hey, that's part of what makes it so compelling.

In the end, Undertale is more than just a game – it's an experience. It's a journey through a world full of wonder, danger, and mystery. And let me tell you, it's one heck of a ride.

Sifu is one of those games that really surprises you. I'm not typically into martial arts, but wow, this game blew me away.

It's like that student you underestimate, but then they show up and completely outshine everyone else, you know?

The graphics are just incredible. Every punch, every movement feels so realistic, so well-done, that you feel like you're in a Kung Fu movie.

And the aging mechanic? What a brilliant idea! With each defeat, your character grows older, physically weaker, but more experienced. It adds an extra layer of strategy to the game that's just sensational.

The story is intriguing, although it gets a bit confusing at times. But you know what's really cool? As you progress, you slowly uncover the protagonist's past and the world around them. It's like each knockout reveals another piece of the puzzle.

Of course, it's not without its flaws. Some may find the difficulty a bit too high, especially in boss battles. And sometimes it feels like there could be a bit more context, a bit more story to tie everything together.

But overall, Sifu is a game that grips you from start to finish. It's challenging, visually stunning, and has a unique mechanic that keeps you coming back for more.

eh... I was just an intern

Valve Desk Job is a simple and short game
Designed to be a tech demo for Valve's controller
but seriously, what a good game
it's soooooooo funny and even beautiful
Reveals some cool Portal lore stuff
There are some sick references

The gameplay, at least on the Dualshock 4, was very enjoyable and made good use of the controller (more than Sony themselves)

Voice Acting is also very good, which isn't very surprising considering it's Valve

never thought Aperture would invest in that.

(Note: the game is free)

nothing_matters

Impressive that this is free.

Nothing Matters is just a game about flipping coins
Seriously
why would I lie?

I swear to you, it's a lovely little game of flipping coins. Super Fun.
I'd even say it surprises you.

If you want to see that I'm telling the truth
The game is Free on Steam, just go there and play

It's totally worth it, seriously, and it's quite short.

Plug it in...

Rating: Huh?/10

I didn't understand anything about the story, and I don't know how to function in society since then, so I think it's totally worth it. 👍

Five Nights At Freddy's 6

I'm not a fan of the franchise or of jump scares as a way to scare players. Jump scares, in themselves, aren't a good form of horror; in fact, they're the laziest way to scare your player. But this game manages to make the most lackluster jump scares I've ever seen. It can't even get the most basic formula right. Throughout the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise, jump scares have been one of the main ways to scare us, but at least the creatures had some effort put into the animation to make it seem like it's not just a GIF. Now, in this game, the creatures basically just zoom in on the screen while a loud sound plays in your headphones.

Of all the games I've played in the franchise, this is the worst in terms of gameplay. It manages to make you lose fear and immersion completely because it's SO BORING. You spend more time yawning than actually playing something. To be honest, I'd rather stare at a DVD loading screen for three hours. Removing the camera aspect and replacing it with just a fake ventilation system seems like a great way to save time making the game, as you don't have to render variations of images for players to know where the animatronics are.

The interview scenes are the ONLY thing that initially made me find it somewhat entertaining. But then it was just the same thing over and over again. The Pizzeria Simulator gimmick is just a way to say there's a new mechanic in the franchise. It doesn't add anything, but it manages to be more fun than the main game itself.

The only thing that theoretically saves this game is its story. I'm not that invested in the Five Nights at Freddy's story, but from what little I know, I know that this game's story is or was somewhat interesting (which ultimately doesn't matter since they're going to make another and another game anyway).

If I were to give it a score as a horror game, I'd give it 1.5/10. Now, as a Five Nights At Freddy's game, I'd give it 2/10.

It managed to fail even at being itself.