DJ RIKUOH is one of the best characters in this franchise

do you guys think if a gas station crackhead went up to the scavenger they'd be able to see a big, red warning sign over their head before attacking

Very fun game I spent a lot of hours playing! Can get too grindy for my liking at points (especially trying to beat the first and second boss), but my overall general skill improved and I eventually completed the game! Very fun but will take a while to get into if you came in not expecting a dungeon crawler roguelike

"WHATS UP GUYS?! TODAY WE WILL BE CONFRONTING HORRORS BEYOND OUR COMPREHENSION! BE SURE TO SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON-"
a mere 10 minutes later
"oh my god guys, luke was killed... can we please get 10,000 likes for luke?"

lone youtuber: "MAN, AM I STRUGGLING TO FIND SOME BACKGROUND FOOTAGE... IF ONLY THERE WAS A GAME I COULD PLAY TO GET SOME..."

clustertrucks: Mercy_Overwatch.gif

the Tatsuro Yamashita tracks really carried this game #tbh

why the fuck DID i buy this?

Okay, I've seen a lot of undeserved negativity for this game, and for this time around I want to make a more serious review for this title as I feel like this game is incredibly overhated.

Fist of the North Star: Lost paradise is a good game with phenomenal gampeplay (second best in the Yakuza series imo) an even better OST. Most people acting like it's a slog are mostly being hyperbolic, this game is fine (outside of a few things that I will mention later).

Now I wanna start by listing a common complaint I've seen in this review section. Many people claim that this game "barely gives you any upgrade orbs and is a slog to get through", this is purely an issue that comes to a certain playstyle where you avoid doing any amount of side content, but this creates an issue (and thus, one of the cons of this game), where this game's upgrade system has upgrade orbs spread across various minigames and substories, even purchasable in places like the Colosseum and Racing shops; but with this arises a problem; what if you just want to quickly complete the story without doing any side content? It's a valid criticism and I understand, but for me side content has always been apart of Yakuza's charm, and I didn't really mind. Outside of a few instances, anyway.

Almost everything to do with the buggy feels undercooked. Exploring the wasteland itself is fun and listening to songs from Sega's library is also fun, but the issue mainly arises when you find out the main way to get a large majority of the items are through randomly dropped treasure maps; which gets slowly but surely incredibly annoying as the drop rate for maps increases by the end of the game. It got to a point where I was getting treasure maps when I least expected nor wanted it and the fact there wasn't any real alternative to get a large amount of the items found without it kind of stunk. Racing is also frustrating at times, mainly because the overall drift is way too high and you end up hitting walls and obstacles fairly frequently. It's not Yakuza 5 Taxi racing.

Another thing that was grindy as all hell was the 100 million substory. TL;DR you have to give 100 million to an old lady because you broke her vase. Whilst the bounty hunter substories and Cabaret Club may help a lot in achieving this goal, it still takes a long time to properly accomplish. My advice is grind out Hostess clubs until you get Make it rain 2 and then just grind that mission over and over.

Everything else though? I heavily enjoyed! The boss fights are incredibly fun (aside from the big fella, who's just okay) and their themes are also very good! Shout out to Toki and Jagi's theme, they're both easily some of the best boss themes RGG has to offer in both very different ways. The combat is also some of the best in this game too, probably my favourite alongside Yakuza 5 Kiryu (Although I will say I prefer this style's burst mode over 5), Talismans, whilst had absurd cooldown times, was a really fun gimmick and I found myself using them a lot more than I initially expected, and I'd give a special shout out to Bartending. Probably one of my favourite minigames in a Yakuza game.

So, yeah. Whilst this game isn't perfect, it definitely doesn't deserve the shit people give this game. It can be grindy at points but it wasn't to the point where I decided to stop doing all side activities and focus on completing the story. Overall, I'd recommend this game thanks to the stellar combat, boss fights and ost (seriously, the second to last boss fight ROCKS and the Jo fight is especially fun in this game, iykyk), just keep in mind you'll need to partially do side content as well (even if it's just a fight in the Colosseum to get enough points for orbs).

"Raiden, forget everything I just told you. The most important thing for you do to now is to buy 1,800 v-bucks and order the Raiden bundle in the Item Shop. Recreate your favorite moments from Metal Gear Solid 2: Guns of Liberty with the Raiden skin, alongside Solid Snake in the Battle pass. And Raiden, always remember to crank 90s and get a victory royale."

This game is far from perfect, Saejima and Akiyama's parts respectively are heavily flawed, but this game is probably the best game of all time.

this game is honestly really good when the game's servers actually work because deep silver/starbreeze decided to make a game that's servers run on a comically large magnet

This review contains spoilers

autism be damned, my boy can violently take out the russian mafia

If a Garten of Banban hater opinionates, I disagree

If a Garten of Banban hater speaks, I ignore

If a Garten of Banban hater fails, I laugh

If a Garten of Banban hater thinks, I despise

If Garten of Banban has 100 fans, I am one of them

If Garten of Banban has 1 fan, I am that fan

If the world is against Garten of Banban, I'm against the entire world

'Till my last breath, I'll support Garten of Banban

i've cooked this turkey for 20 minutes, if it's still raw by now i swear to god...

the turkey in question:

grandma got me the wrong game please help