Giloplayz
1993
Sonic CD is not a well-designed game. It is cryptic, confusing and Wacky Workbench can go fuck itself. This is what I thought to myself on my first playthrough.
However, I find this game so incredibly endearing like no other entry in the franchise. As a result, I have found myself coming back time and time again, working around the bullshit to revel in 2 specific aspects of the game that are undeniably brilliant.
The first is it's soundtrack. Having a past/present/Gfuture/Bfuture of a stage is not only an incredible concept visually, but also a composer's dream. As if that weren't enough, SEGA of America heard it and thought "we can do better than that." It's still disputed if they actually did (the boss theme haunts my dreams) but having two entirely distinct and inspired soundtracks in any game is never a bad thing.
The Soundtrack is a big part of the other thing that gives this game its gravitational pull, its psychedelic atmosphere. Some do not enjoy the flashing lights and vibrant patterns/colours of it's alliteratively named stages, which sound more like intense cerebral notions rather than geographical locations. I for one can tell they were on something when they made this game, and I want their dealers number.
Not a good game, but it was never really trying to be one.
However, I find this game so incredibly endearing like no other entry in the franchise. As a result, I have found myself coming back time and time again, working around the bullshit to revel in 2 specific aspects of the game that are undeniably brilliant.
The first is it's soundtrack. Having a past/present/Gfuture/Bfuture of a stage is not only an incredible concept visually, but also a composer's dream. As if that weren't enough, SEGA of America heard it and thought "we can do better than that." It's still disputed if they actually did (the boss theme haunts my dreams) but having two entirely distinct and inspired soundtracks in any game is never a bad thing.
The Soundtrack is a big part of the other thing that gives this game its gravitational pull, its psychedelic atmosphere. Some do not enjoy the flashing lights and vibrant patterns/colours of it's alliteratively named stages, which sound more like intense cerebral notions rather than geographical locations. I for one can tell they were on something when they made this game, and I want their dealers number.
Not a good game, but it was never really trying to be one.
(This is a review for both games)
In theory, this game is the perfect 2D sonic: excellent soundtrack, a well-told but not intrusive story, inventive and speedy levels... well, for the most part.
Unfortunately, it's a case of quite a few tiny cracks in its hull that bring this ship down a little bit. Every level seems to have some obtuse gimmick that has no right to be in a sonic game (the spinning wheels of Marble Garden, the infinite pits of Ice Capp, tedious seesaws in Mushroom hill, too many aspects of Sandopolis to count, instant death crushers in Flying battery and who could forget the barrels of doom).
If none were there, I would absolutely say this is the greatest 2D Sonic. But they are. So it's not.
Also quick one about the MJ/Jetzons original soundtrack. I definitely prefer Icecap, launch base I could go either way but the original carnival night track is genuinely awful for a Sonic. It has no driving rhythm; in fact, there are tons of long awkward stops, a but like the actual level. Also, using the Entry of the Gladiators melody in your circus-themed composition is just creatively bankrupt. I know music is about personal taste but I think this track is horribly overrated still.
In theory, this game is the perfect 2D sonic: excellent soundtrack, a well-told but not intrusive story, inventive and speedy levels... well, for the most part.
Unfortunately, it's a case of quite a few tiny cracks in its hull that bring this ship down a little bit. Every level seems to have some obtuse gimmick that has no right to be in a sonic game (the spinning wheels of Marble Garden, the infinite pits of Ice Capp, tedious seesaws in Mushroom hill, too many aspects of Sandopolis to count, instant death crushers in Flying battery and who could forget the barrels of doom).
If none were there, I would absolutely say this is the greatest 2D Sonic. But they are. So it's not.
Also quick one about the MJ/Jetzons original soundtrack. I definitely prefer Icecap, launch base I could go either way but the original carnival night track is genuinely awful for a Sonic. It has no driving rhythm; in fact, there are tons of long awkward stops, a but like the actual level. Also, using the Entry of the Gladiators melody in your circus-themed composition is just creatively bankrupt. I know music is about personal taste but I think this track is horribly overrated still.
1992
Now THIS is more like it! Chemical Plant is one of the single best zones of any sonic game; they absolutely nail the pure speed and adrenaline that comes with it. The other stages are a little bit hit or miss but overall I enjoy them all for playing very differently to each other.
My only criticism would be that boss fights, particularly the final zone, are not particularly enjoyable. Sonic has struggled with these as early as his first appearance and while I like that some of these have very quick ways to beat them, none are particularly interesting. The final egg robot is a pain in the ass as every time you die you have to fight mecha sonic AGAIN! And I died a lot because of his tiny hit box.
Other than that, they nailed the blue blur on their 2nd attempt. Good job.
My only criticism would be that boss fights, particularly the final zone, are not particularly enjoyable. Sonic has struggled with these as early as his first appearance and while I like that some of these have very quick ways to beat them, none are particularly interesting. The final egg robot is a pain in the ass as every time you die you have to fight mecha sonic AGAIN! And I died a lot because of his tiny hit box.
Other than that, they nailed the blue blur on their 2nd attempt. Good job.
1991
You sure have a long way to go, Sonic. Gaslights you into thinking it'll be a good game with the first level. It is not.
If this game is not for you, I understand. It is a very story and cutscene-heavy game and is typically only adored by people who played it as a child so as to ignore this fault. I expected to find more faults in my recent replay. But no. Instead, in the slew of recent mediocre mainline titles, this holds up as one of the most emotionally successful games in Nintendo's library. I wish not to spoil anything other than that the final chapter made me cry countlessly as a child and even more so as an adult now understanding even more of its themes.
Again, if you prefer the main entries, I get it. Their gameplay is generally more expansive and, of course, some may not enjoy the roguelike elements. But anyone who grew up with the game will understand exactly what I mean when I say it is far, far more than some Pokémon spin-off game. It is a heart-wrenching masterpiece of storytelling.
Again, if you prefer the main entries, I get it. Their gameplay is generally more expansive and, of course, some may not enjoy the roguelike elements. But anyone who grew up with the game will understand exactly what I mean when I say it is far, far more than some Pokémon spin-off game. It is a heart-wrenching masterpiece of storytelling.
2022
I came into this with the lowest expectations possible. The online discourse around its release was palpable. I ended up picking it up anyway a few months after and to my joyous surprise, I actually really enjoyed it.
It is of course flawed in that the progression is completely fucked. I started out by trying to go to clearly late-game areas very early which was a blast! I then wondered how would the game deal with this: simple, it doesn't. I was then stuck with zero challenge for the 2nd half until the very end and even that was laughable. How the fuck did Geeta get her job she has a Gogoat?
For me this was all made up for by a few things. Screwed as it's progression is, it is finally an actual open world pokemon entry and the parts that work really work. Wild encounters feel great and the overworld is very well crafted if a bit graphically inferior to other switch titles.
What really made everything up to me though was it's soundtrack and characters. Pokémon soundtracks have always been great but this one is a different beast entirely. Team Star's boss music is one of Nintendo's all-time greatest compositions and instrumentations.
The main characters all have something incredibly compelling about them and they genuinely feel like childhood friends instead of faceless rivals. They're at their absolute best in the post-game chapter which I did not expect for a second to be as breath-taking as it was.
If Gamefreak takes one thing from this it's that they absolutely CAN make something reminiscent of BW. They just need to try a little bit harder.
It is of course flawed in that the progression is completely fucked. I started out by trying to go to clearly late-game areas very early which was a blast! I then wondered how would the game deal with this: simple, it doesn't. I was then stuck with zero challenge for the 2nd half until the very end and even that was laughable. How the fuck did Geeta get her job she has a Gogoat?
For me this was all made up for by a few things. Screwed as it's progression is, it is finally an actual open world pokemon entry and the parts that work really work. Wild encounters feel great and the overworld is very well crafted if a bit graphically inferior to other switch titles.
What really made everything up to me though was it's soundtrack and characters. Pokémon soundtracks have always been great but this one is a different beast entirely. Team Star's boss music is one of Nintendo's all-time greatest compositions and instrumentations.
The main characters all have something incredibly compelling about them and they genuinely feel like childhood friends instead of faceless rivals. They're at their absolute best in the post-game chapter which I did not expect for a second to be as breath-taking as it was.
If Gamefreak takes one thing from this it's that they absolutely CAN make something reminiscent of BW. They just need to try a little bit harder.
2019
This is the only game I have ever pre-ordered. I was on a high after USUM and thought the series was looking up, especially after being lead to believe we finally had an open-world entry. Imagine my surprise when I was met with this unfinished, soulless, ugly, easy, boring piece of shit that calls itself an entry to the series. It's as if it was made in unity in the space of a few months by someone who had never played a Pokémon game before. Even XY felt like a finished game and not a gaslight.
Go fuck yourself.
Go fuck yourself.
2017
Generally a massive improvement in difficulty and story than the last generation. If I was ranking my first playthrough I'd give it an extra 1 and a half stars. But a recent replay attempt at a hardcore nuzloke revealed its many flaws...
There are unskippable cutscenes everywhere. I stopped my attempt not out of difficulty but out of frustration with just how slow this game actually is. I enjoyed using the pool of available mons and overall challenging fights throughout but knowing that failure would lead to rewatching the same shit for the 3rd or 4th time was too much to handle.
Also, why does the "Ultra" version go out of its way to remove meaningful moments like the rainy cave talk with Lillie? It is a shame because in concept I love the story of this game. Lusamine is excellent as a villain and her motives make a great deal of sense, while also being an objectively bad parent which leads to two very well written characters. Hau is a bit bland if optimistic though, so its a shame Kukui was replaced by him in this version. Z moves are fairly less interesting than megas and their animations come off more as goofy than cool. Having megas in the same game detracts from the meta as well, knowing I could be 1 shot at any moment without warning is not fun.
I adore certain moments of this game but they are often not worth the preamble, especially on re-play.
There are unskippable cutscenes everywhere. I stopped my attempt not out of difficulty but out of frustration with just how slow this game actually is. I enjoyed using the pool of available mons and overall challenging fights throughout but knowing that failure would lead to rewatching the same shit for the 3rd or 4th time was too much to handle.
Also, why does the "Ultra" version go out of its way to remove meaningful moments like the rainy cave talk with Lillie? It is a shame because in concept I love the story of this game. Lusamine is excellent as a villain and her motives make a great deal of sense, while also being an objectively bad parent which leads to two very well written characters. Hau is a bit bland if optimistic though, so its a shame Kukui was replaced by him in this version. Z moves are fairly less interesting than megas and their animations come off more as goofy than cool. Having megas in the same game detracts from the meta as well, knowing I could be 1 shot at any moment without warning is not fun.
I adore certain moments of this game but they are often not worth the preamble, especially on re-play.
2013
This review contains spoilers
I'll start with the positives, all 2 of them.
I don't usually praise the soundtracks of these games simply because it's just given that they are exceptional. This is thankfully very much still the case and there are some very memorable town themes.
I like megas, I don't like the gimmicks they inspired, but this one works, if only in a competitive sense. This brings me to my major praise: this is perhaps the best metagame in the series. There was an oversight that did not increase the speed stat on the first turn of mega evolving, but I actually think this added a layer of strategy to an overwise overpowered mechanic. Sure seeing Lando T in every game sucks but that was the case last gen and for as much as I love gen 5, that games meta is just weather wars.
Ok other than that fuck this game. It's insultingly easy. The characters are lifeless and the story falls flat on its face as a result. The villain (I don't even remember his name just his stupid hair) wants to destroy the world which could've made sense in a pure evil cyrus/ghetsis way, however, there's a moment at the end where he admits Pokémon have to die too. It tries to make him seem resentful and pull at your heartstrings but it just makes him seem like a fucking buffoon. Did you not think of this? Why carry out all this if you don't even like what it results in? I guess the history and the timeline diversion stuff is semi-interesting for the series as a whole, but it culminates far better in the delta episode of ORAS than it does in this entire game.
Good meta, abysmal generation of Pokémon.
I don't usually praise the soundtracks of these games simply because it's just given that they are exceptional. This is thankfully very much still the case and there are some very memorable town themes.
I like megas, I don't like the gimmicks they inspired, but this one works, if only in a competitive sense. This brings me to my major praise: this is perhaps the best metagame in the series. There was an oversight that did not increase the speed stat on the first turn of mega evolving, but I actually think this added a layer of strategy to an overwise overpowered mechanic. Sure seeing Lando T in every game sucks but that was the case last gen and for as much as I love gen 5, that games meta is just weather wars.
Ok other than that fuck this game. It's insultingly easy. The characters are lifeless and the story falls flat on its face as a result. The villain (I don't even remember his name just his stupid hair) wants to destroy the world which could've made sense in a pure evil cyrus/ghetsis way, however, there's a moment at the end where he admits Pokémon have to die too. It tries to make him seem resentful and pull at your heartstrings but it just makes him seem like a fucking buffoon. Did you not think of this? Why carry out all this if you don't even like what it results in? I guess the history and the timeline diversion stuff is semi-interesting for the series as a whole, but it culminates far better in the delta episode of ORAS than it does in this entire game.
Good meta, abysmal generation of Pokémon.
It boldly tries things no other entry had ever or will ever replicate because they were vilified on release. I will never understand why and as a result, the series went into decline. Everybody loves it now, but unfortunately, it is too late. Enjoy your easy and soulless romps critics, its what you asked for.
My only criticism is that Patrat exists.
My only criticism is that Patrat exists.
HMs have been the scourge of this series for a while, which is most apparent in this gen even in the definitive edition. While platinum makes so many improvements and additions I couldn't possibly list them all, the game is still a bit slow overall. Other than that though this offers things other later entries have continually failed at.
The difficulty curve is excellent, because of this, my hardcore nuzlocke is one of the most challenging and memorable moments I have had with any game. I grew so attached to a ponyta that I was close to tears when it was killed a riolu's counter. But then I got a riolu for myself and took him from level 1 all the way to the league and that fucker absolutely redeemed himself by not only 1shotting cynthias garchomp with a critical close combat, but also DOING IT THE NEXT TURN TO ROSELIA WHO RESISTS IT.
Battle frontier will likely never comeback, for which I am very resentful. I've spent far too much time in the battle factory alone.
Finally the story has some dumb moments (the literal terrorist attack in Pastoria) but it has tons of potential. Cyrus is a legitimately excellent manipulator with a deeply hidden backstory. The distortion world is the pinnacle of this game and summarises the entire experience for me: It may be slow but it is a challenging and immensely memorable journey.
The difficulty curve is excellent, because of this, my hardcore nuzlocke is one of the most challenging and memorable moments I have had with any game. I grew so attached to a ponyta that I was close to tears when it was killed a riolu's counter. But then I got a riolu for myself and took him from level 1 all the way to the league and that fucker absolutely redeemed himself by not only 1shotting cynthias garchomp with a critical close combat, but also DOING IT THE NEXT TURN TO ROSELIA WHO RESISTS IT.
Battle frontier will likely never comeback, for which I am very resentful. I've spent far too much time in the battle factory alone.
Finally the story has some dumb moments (the literal terrorist attack in Pastoria) but it has tons of potential. Cyrus is a legitimately excellent manipulator with a deeply hidden backstory. The distortion world is the pinnacle of this game and summarises the entire experience for me: It may be slow but it is a challenging and immensely memorable journey.
2014
Includes some of the better aspects of Gen 6 with fewer flaws. It is still far, far too easy, but new megas are appreciated. The story of gen 3 has always been a bit silly and boring for me, but the delta episode has absolutely no right to be as amazing as it is. The locations are all lovingly redesigned in 3ds. Please bring back Latio's flying (I guess they kind of did in gen 8).
Need to play more of it as decided to hardcore nuzlocke as a first attempt which has been unbelievably frustrating. Even if I was not though, I don't think I'd enjoy it. It still has the same problems for me as the first entry but without witty dialogue, hell the story as a whole just is not there other than the rival character, or even as many janky glitches to give it character. Mons are still limited because the new ones have stupid catching/evolving requirements and the ones that don't are straight-up unviable. Will give the remake a shot one day but overall, disappointed so far.
Obviously prefer this over the original, but it's still not for me. dialogue is charming and now iconic and I appreciate that it opens up a lot halfway through. Not really a fan of everything else. was expecting it to be harder for an older title but I still breezed through it and got bored near the end. And while I COULD hardcore nuzlocke it as I do with every entry, the limited pool of now ubiquitous mons deters me. I do not want a Raticate or a Pidgey thank you. Has not aged well, even in the remake.
Kinstones are shit and quagmire everything else. Also, it doesn't really even have a story which sucks in this series.
A shame because I love this entry. I enjoy every dungeon and I absolutely adore tiny sections, both I attribute to their atmosphere and charm. It's incredibly tight to control with extra sword attacks and most of the items are pretty well utilised and fun. If Kinstones simply did not exist, I think this one would get a lot more praise.
A shame because I love this entry. I enjoy every dungeon and I absolutely adore tiny sections, both I attribute to their atmosphere and charm. It's incredibly tight to control with extra sword attacks and most of the items are pretty well utilised and fun. If Kinstones simply did not exist, I think this one would get a lot more praise.