I played it like 1-2 years ago. It's a fine puzzle game with a fun idea, but it's overall not of high quality.

The reason I'm reviewing it now is because recently tik tok is spamming me with ads of this game. Except it's not this game. I mean it looks exactly the same but it's called something different.
So, I dig around a little and I find there are a TON of clones of this game concept. Some are extremely similar. I think this "original" one has 30million+ downloads so it makes sense there are so many bootlegs trying to have a slice of that cake.
My "research" led me to a code selling website, where some dude is selling a ready to publish version including the source code and every asset.
It's funny because at the top it clearly says: NOTE: Please Reskin the game before publishing. I guess some people couldn't even bother changing some pngs.

On one hand this is a really fun party game and a great concept.
On the other hand, the game takes ages to load when you start it, then locks most of the "content" behind a paygate.

If you really think about it you pay for a bunch of text prompts.
It's better to just play other free clones or... use pen and paper?

Back to my old habits, I downloaded a game from an ad that looked interesting.
The first thing that appeared after opening the app was a subscription pop up... yeah it's a mobile game alright.

There's an ad in every single screen of this game pretty much. You doing anything = an ad, plus you get opportunities to watch more ads to get more rewards!
It's actual gameplay is alright and I got to enjoy it more while on airplane mode, but I bet there's a better game just like this for free on newgrounds.

Well what can I say. It's kind of sad, it looks like it has less budget than a licensed cartoon network flash game from the 2000's. What they paid for the license must've been 90% of the budget.

It's a very homogeneous game. Everyone plays the same. Everyone does the same sound when thrown. Everyone looks like... enlarged chibis, does that make sense?

The only difference between each character is their 3 special moves. The only way to gain meter is to ki charge, then you can do a level 1, 2 or 3 attack. Some take ages to actually do damage (like goku's genkidama), others suck ass because you can block even if you got hit (like piccolo's level 2).

There are no combos, except for 2 universal target combos that suck ass.

The big mechanic in this game is the sky battle! Press down down up B and take off! Then your opponent can go up too and challenge you... to a button mashing contest, oooor just ki charge clearly gaining the advantage while you come down then get hit by one of their supers.

This is straight up shovelware. At least there's replay value in unlocking the additional characters, or completing the gallery filled with low res pictures of the anime.

Funny that you can play as Raditz, so that is one thing it has over Fighterz.

un tss un tss un tss
get into a fight in complete silence
spam punches and kicks
un tss un tss un tss

That is the whole game
From the moment you boot up the game:
It's a 90's CGI cutscene with that same do do doo leitmotif, followed up by absolute silence when you can actually input commands (either the main menu or in battle). The first time it happened I was laughing non stop; all that build up for such terrible gameplay in complete silence.

I guess everything being connected by CGI cutscenes is kind of a cool idea, but the fighting is ass. You can only use 1 (one) character, that is not even a robot, and the whole roster of characters, including your opponents, is smaller than the first Street Fighter, another fighting game where you only use 1 character (that game has 10 enemies plus ryu and ken).

Your main character (cyborg) has 2 standing attack animations, 2 crouching, and 2 jumping ones. You have 3 punches and 3 kicks. The only difference between light and heavy attacks is that the animation plays slower on the heavy one (and it does more damage I guess).

You just mash. There are no combos. Sometimes you can't even tell if you actually landed a hit or not. Hitstun is minimal and sometimes you can get punished on hit. I guess that's another similarity this game has with Street Fighter 1 huh... that is a sad similarity, and this game is worse than SF1. At least in SF1 you have the iconic hadoken, shoryuken and tatsumaki. Here in Rise cyborg can punch, kick and... tackle?

One last thing, that final boss was absolute bullshit. It has 2 near instantaneous moves that it can decide to throw out even if it got hit. One is a mantis attack that can loop into itself and does massive chip damage. The other is a jumping needle attack that works like a get off me move.
The cherry on top is that the boss also has an instantaneous, fully invincible, healing move... at any time it can melt and heal almost half a life bar.

The Supervisor (that's the final boss's name) took me a ton of tries, and even after beating it the game had the balls of giving me a bad ending for playing on normal mode. I had to admit it was very funny, just like when I lost to Military and the game allowed me to continue, then, after beating that robot, it made me start over from scratch.

Hey this is just a shittier, grosser Killer Instinct!

One thing I will give this game, is that the combo system is surprisingly lenient. Every time that I thought "that was it I can't keep going", it turned out that I could keep going, and it doesn't have crazy execution or anything like that, it's very free flow and casual friendly. You can just chain things. It's not a deep game but most of my enjoyment of it came from this.

It's... fine, but hell no I'm not playing it again as I would have to endure the shit:

-So, the framerate suffers the more you land hits, because of the million particles that fly out of every character when they get hit. Isn't that great?

-It also looks teeeerrible. The 3d backgrounds look bad and the 2d sprites clash with them. The character animations look choppy. The menus are very cheap looking and really as a whole the game just looks low quality.

-Then there's the fecalfunny. Characters are constantly talking, making terrible quips or painful jokes. I found most of it annoying even if the voice acting was actually great.


If you'd like to play as naked santa or capt booger, sure go ahead you freak.

It's like the devs made a tech demo and liked it so much that they made it into a full game somehow. Makes me think about Knack in that sense.

At first glance I was very impressed: It's a full 3d fighting game, as in you can sidestep and sidewalk like it's soul calibur, so points for that. Then you get to the fighting.

The game feels like ballz.
It has some interesting mechanics but there are some questionable design decisions that bring this whole thing down.
Jumps are weird and the camera can sometimes get into weird angles.
Landing hits is so unsatisfying, sometimes you can't even tell if you got the hit, as this game doesn't have hitsparks or a punching sound; the ballz just say ouch.
In addition to that, the game has some questionable hit detection.

Due to the way normal moves work (fast, with high pushback so no combos)and that sometimes you can't even tell if they hit or not, this game is more of a button masher. It's silly and you're not supposed to take it seriously but there are better feeling fighting games to just mess around with.

The soundtrack also sucks ballz.

I can't believe I'm rating this as high as I'm doing but I had so much fun... "fighting games are great" I was thinking to myself while I played this.

It's objectively a bad game. It's also hilarious, so my enjoyment of this piece of history came from enjoying kusoge. It's so bad it's funny.

Crusty. The movement is crusty. The music is crusty. Sometimes you can get punished for hitting an enemy. Most of your moves suck ass.
Oh but your opponents? They can zip around the screen precisely, spamming moves that kill you in 2-3 hits. It's nuts.
The first time it happened I couldn't help but laugh: Lee fucking destroyed me in like 3 seconds, moving like a lag-switching, Genei Jin activated, divekick spamming Yun.

The way moves hit is so weird. Sometimes moves can hit multiple times, essentially turning the move into a OHKO (when this happens with your Shoryuken Dragon Punch it's a blessing). Other times the same move doesn't push back or just completely misses when it looks it should've hit.
Of course your normal punches and kicks are the most affected by this. They suck.

If your punches and kicks are awful, do no damage and sometimes just lead to you eating a big hit from your enemy, how are you supposed to win against screen zipping, move spamming enemies? You use your super secret special moves of course!
Everyone knows the Hadoken Fireball, and it along with the Dragon Punch are your only good moves.
-it takes 3 fireballs to KO an opponent, and it's your only ranged option
-the dragon punch is crazy. It grants you full invincibility and sometimes it OHKOs. At the end of the game it's your only way of defending yourself against the spam of Adon and Sagat.
-there's also the tatsu Hurricane Kick... it does good damage but it takes ages for ryu to start spinning and doing damage.

Too bad actually getting the damn Dragon Punch to come out is painful. I guess the game would be too easy if you could easily do it.
I know you have to negative edge the special moves but even then I was struggling. Sometimes I destroyed and perfected the cpu (I scored 1 lucky perfect round against both Adon and Sagat), other times I NEEDED a dragon punch to save me but 1 missinput and I'm dead a second later.

Beating the game took me 45+minutes. And the whole time I had to endure the soundtrack and sound effects.
"You've got a lot to learn before you beat me. Try again, kiddo!" Is ingrained into my head.
The stage background music is strangely both great and terrible... except for Sagat's, that theme is ear piercing.

Sagat... holy shit Sagat. Adon was painful as he just spammed Jaguar Kick over and over and over and over and over. He was the first unga bunga character in fighting games.
Final boss Sagat is a different beast. He destroys you in 1-2 hits. He's crazy fast, moving around using Tiger Knee while being fully fireball immune. When at full screen (or sometimes right in your face) he can throw a blazing fast Tiger Shot, and I don't think you can block it? I think you can only duck it.
Rounds only last a few seconds vs Sagat. Every time you lose he laughs... every time... it took me so long to beat him, I think I made him sad and on my winning round he did nothing and just took 3 fireballs to the face. I felt like Dan but hey, a win is a win!

After becoming king of the hill I had no time to rest on my glory. A challenger appeared to dispute my title. (I invited my gf to try this funny game) I, of course, successfully defended it, proving I was the strongest street fighter in the world!

Time for the main event!
Behold: One of the worst games of all time. A game so bad it crashed the whole market. Copies of it were hunted and destroyed.

...uhhhh am I missing something?
When I look at this game, then look at the small selection of atari garbage I recently played I can see that they are not created equally.
E.T. actually has a title screen, an opening and ending cutscene, a map made of multiple screens, 3 npcs that wander the map, multiple collectibles...
Sure at first I was constantly falling into the holes over and over, and it took me a while until I understood how the hell I could get out without falling again.
Then I was walking aimlessly around the map trying to understand wtf I was supposed to do, or what anything did.
But through trial and error I kinda understood my main objective: gathering... shiny pieces of something (it's hard to tell what anything is on the atari) found randomly on the holes.

I don't think everyone would be as patient as I was, figuring out what to do when nothing seemed to work immediately. I especially don't think that the people that were hyped for this game (thanks to the movie and whatever deceptive advertising was used to promote this), would be happy after booting this up and playing for a few minutes (although having the manual is an advantage they would have over me lmao). This released around christmas...
History tends to repeat itself and I believe that this game is the first hyped AAA game that was rushed in development and then underdelivered. You hate to see it.

It's funny how expectations warp your reception of media (or anything in general really). Since I was expecting the worst of the worst, I'm... disappointed but not in the same way.
E.T. is not that bad. It's not good either, it's full of flaws, but for the console it's in... I mean what were people expecting a movie adaptation?
Most of the game's flaws can be blamed on the rushed development. Imagine if escaping the holes wasn't that painful, the game's reputation would be better for sure.

I ended up beating the game on my 3rd try. So, you have to find 3 of the shiny things, and once you have them all you activate the alien ship power and a count down activates. Oh, I forgot, the powers (or actions idk): On the top of the screen icons will appear as you move. I believe it's random but certain coordinates will result in specific powers. Some move you to the next screen, others heal you. One highlights a hole if it has a shiny object.
The one you need to use when you have the 3 shiny objects looks like a space invader, after activating it you then have to stand on the landing zone on the first screen where the game started. If you are standing on the correct square when the timer ends, you win, and E.T. will go back home.

It's... kind of dull but it's way more elaborate that the atari2600 games I recently played. It definitely isn't "worst game of all time" material.

Pac-man after the accident can only eat lines...

Man no wonder this contributed to the vg crash, I definitely would stop having faith in home consoles after playing this awful port. The publishers didn't even try to lie in the cover art. They knew.

E.T. can't be worse than this right?

"You score the big points in this game by getting the general to rape an indian woman tied to a stake" YUP

As a game it's bad, you just walk to the right, dodging spears falling from the sky (that don't look that they can hit you), then you press the sex button to score.

Obviously it's on purpose that it's a simple game that can be played with one hand... but as a piece of erotica content, is this really something that can turn anyone on? This game was sold on adult video stores; would you rather buy this or get a vhs porno tape with actual woman or, hell, a magazine? Even if you are a sick freak couldn't you jack it off to drawings of this rape fantasy or... use your imagination??? You would have to be extremely desperate to use this game and be actually turned on by the pixelated titties.