2008
20 YEARS OF GAMING PART 5
I can not think of a single game where the game's combat singularly ruins it quite like this one.
I can not think of a single game where the game's combat singularly ruins it quite like this one.
2024
"The localization is fine. Please just reconnect with soap and water for god's sake."
As someone who hopped on the VanillaWare train incredibly late, I am very happy to say that Unicorn Overlord is another really great RPG from them! It's, from what I've gathered, a lot closer to their older work than 13 Sentinels Aegis Rim. And just for starters, if you're expecting this game narratively to blow your dick off the way 13 Sentinels did, you will probably be disappointed. While the game's story isn't bad, it is fairly rote and predictable. Which isn't a bad thing and it remains entertaining due to its memorable cast of characters.
But like I said, this is maybe the one time where I can safely say that the story not being incredible isn't a deal breaker for an RPG, as the rest of the game is pretty damn great. To get the obvious out of the way, the art style and visual landscapes all look incredible. I sincerely wish to see more hand-drawn 2D RPGs in the future because this looks amazing. Additionally, the game sounds amazing too, not just with its great music but its strong sound design as well.
And of course, the strategy gameplay in this game is incredibly entertaining and borderline addicting. It seems simple and basic at first, but it opens itself up to a nice flow, while not being mindless like a bunch of the more recent FE games (insert Fates joke here). Some of the later missions especially actually required quite a bit of strategy and left me thinking for quite a bit on what path to take.
While some of its smaller gameplay systems like the Romance system could use some work (insert Fates joke he-), and I wish the UI was a lot more snappy and user-friendly with its layout, the overall flow of the gameplay is incredibly strong despite its narrative not being the most unique thing out there. Unicorn Overlord is an incredibly strong SRPG that I'd recommend to fans of the genre, even if in multiple ways, I do prefer 13 Sentinels to this game.
As someone who hopped on the VanillaWare train incredibly late, I am very happy to say that Unicorn Overlord is another really great RPG from them! It's, from what I've gathered, a lot closer to their older work than 13 Sentinels Aegis Rim. And just for starters, if you're expecting this game narratively to blow your dick off the way 13 Sentinels did, you will probably be disappointed. While the game's story isn't bad, it is fairly rote and predictable. Which isn't a bad thing and it remains entertaining due to its memorable cast of characters.
But like I said, this is maybe the one time where I can safely say that the story not being incredible isn't a deal breaker for an RPG, as the rest of the game is pretty damn great. To get the obvious out of the way, the art style and visual landscapes all look incredible. I sincerely wish to see more hand-drawn 2D RPGs in the future because this looks amazing. Additionally, the game sounds amazing too, not just with its great music but its strong sound design as well.
And of course, the strategy gameplay in this game is incredibly entertaining and borderline addicting. It seems simple and basic at first, but it opens itself up to a nice flow, while not being mindless like a bunch of the more recent FE games (insert Fates joke here). Some of the later missions especially actually required quite a bit of strategy and left me thinking for quite a bit on what path to take.
While some of its smaller gameplay systems like the Romance system could use some work (insert Fates joke he-), and I wish the UI was a lot more snappy and user-friendly with its layout, the overall flow of the gameplay is incredibly strong despite its narrative not being the most unique thing out there. Unicorn Overlord is an incredibly strong SRPG that I'd recommend to fans of the genre, even if in multiple ways, I do prefer 13 Sentinels to this game.
This review contains spoilers
"Wait, how are they supposed to call Part 3 Reunion if they already used that on the Crisis Core Remaster-"
At the core of this game, or should I say most of it, is a game that is leaps and bounds ahead of FF7 Remake in almost every way. I'll go into detail about that other stuff later but holy fuck this game is a fucking MIRACLE to play. The game looks and sounds mind-blowing with an easy Best Score and Music-winning soundtrack. Even though some of it is reused from Remake, the many MANY new tracks all sound amazing. It's also, like I said, graphically mind-blowing. Some of the shit that happens in this game is a technical achievement that 90% of other games would kill to get.
But it's not just the aesthetics, the game's combat is also noticeably improved from Remake. Instead of adding so many new major mechanics on top of Remake's system which would bloat the combat, instead it's mostly done through the new Synergy Skills, the new party members, and a bunch of little changes that fit so naturally into the combat style of Remake, that I bet that game is going to have the Breath of the Wild effect of "how did I ever play it like this" come in. Also for what it's worth I actually quite like how fun this game is compared to remake. There's a mission where you help a dog and then the song goes "Bow wow wow Bow wow wow" even while you fight enemies. It's a good year for doggies in JRPGs. And Queensblood is actually very addicting and I had to stop myself at a certain point so I could continue the narrative.
So, this game seems like the best Square Enix game since NieR Automata. So... why is it ranked LOWER than Remake for me? Well, there are two problems I have related to major parts of the game that I have some issues with. First, the open world. Yes, I love a bunch of the side quests I did do, but a lot of other aspects of this world feel very Ubisoft-y. Unlike most games with open-world elements, I just stopped exploring the world after a while. Even though they give you some incentive to explore it, it just wasn't all that fun and part of me wishes that they handled it a little differently. Because I had issues with the world design of FFXVI last year as well.
And speaking of FFXVI, one of my biggest complaints there was with how blah the story is. Well, I am pleased to report that FFVII Rebirth is actually incredibly strong in the story department. Sure they do have some pacing issues, and sure Cait Sith is one of the most annoying characters I've had the displeasure of experiencing in a while, but for the most part the cast's interactions, the narrative twists, and the emotional beats all hit leading to an incredibly satisfying narrative experience.
And then the game ends. Holy FUCK. I read early reviews criticizing the ending for going completely off the rails, and I had NO CLUE it would be this bad. It leaves an insanely bad taste in my mouth, which sucks because this is an otherwise incredible game. It's one thing if Fire Emblem Engage's ending is bad because the whole story is bad. But when you have a story and an experience as amazing as Rebirth and then hit us with Multiverse bullshit and an awkward retooling of Aerith's death, and Cloud going even more coo-coo than in the original, and I just wasn't a huge fan of it at all.
Even after over 30 hours of some of the best Final Fantasy gameplay I've ever played, this one fucking ending (along with the problems I have with the pacing) makes me look at this game a lot less fondly than Remake. When that ended, I was confused, sure, but I was overall intrigued to see where they take this. Now, I just have no clue how they're possibly going to stick the landing. It's mostly dependent on how Part 3 is done, but man this is so fucking awkward now.
However, it is still a great game because bow wow wow bow wow wow.
At the core of this game, or should I say most of it, is a game that is leaps and bounds ahead of FF7 Remake in almost every way. I'll go into detail about that other stuff later but holy fuck this game is a fucking MIRACLE to play. The game looks and sounds mind-blowing with an easy Best Score and Music-winning soundtrack. Even though some of it is reused from Remake, the many MANY new tracks all sound amazing. It's also, like I said, graphically mind-blowing. Some of the shit that happens in this game is a technical achievement that 90% of other games would kill to get.
But it's not just the aesthetics, the game's combat is also noticeably improved from Remake. Instead of adding so many new major mechanics on top of Remake's system which would bloat the combat, instead it's mostly done through the new Synergy Skills, the new party members, and a bunch of little changes that fit so naturally into the combat style of Remake, that I bet that game is going to have the Breath of the Wild effect of "how did I ever play it like this" come in. Also for what it's worth I actually quite like how fun this game is compared to remake. There's a mission where you help a dog and then the song goes "Bow wow wow Bow wow wow" even while you fight enemies. It's a good year for doggies in JRPGs. And Queensblood is actually very addicting and I had to stop myself at a certain point so I could continue the narrative.
So, this game seems like the best Square Enix game since NieR Automata. So... why is it ranked LOWER than Remake for me? Well, there are two problems I have related to major parts of the game that I have some issues with. First, the open world. Yes, I love a bunch of the side quests I did do, but a lot of other aspects of this world feel very Ubisoft-y. Unlike most games with open-world elements, I just stopped exploring the world after a while. Even though they give you some incentive to explore it, it just wasn't all that fun and part of me wishes that they handled it a little differently. Because I had issues with the world design of FFXVI last year as well.
And speaking of FFXVI, one of my biggest complaints there was with how blah the story is. Well, I am pleased to report that FFVII Rebirth is actually incredibly strong in the story department. Sure they do have some pacing issues, and sure Cait Sith is one of the most annoying characters I've had the displeasure of experiencing in a while, but for the most part the cast's interactions, the narrative twists, and the emotional beats all hit leading to an incredibly satisfying narrative experience.
And then the game ends. Holy FUCK. I read early reviews criticizing the ending for going completely off the rails, and I had NO CLUE it would be this bad. It leaves an insanely bad taste in my mouth, which sucks because this is an otherwise incredible game. It's one thing if Fire Emblem Engage's ending is bad because the whole story is bad. But when you have a story and an experience as amazing as Rebirth and then hit us with Multiverse bullshit and an awkward retooling of Aerith's death, and Cloud going even more coo-coo than in the original, and I just wasn't a huge fan of it at all.
Even after over 30 hours of some of the best Final Fantasy gameplay I've ever played, this one fucking ending (along with the problems I have with the pacing) makes me look at this game a lot less fondly than Remake. When that ended, I was confused, sure, but I was overall intrigued to see where they take this. Now, I just have no clue how they're possibly going to stick the landing. It's mostly dependent on how Part 3 is done, but man this is so fucking awkward now.
However, it is still a great game because bow wow wow bow wow wow.
A near mathematically precise 50/50 split between "We're so back" and "It's so over" is lifted up for me because it's clear that there was charm, passion, and effort that went into this game. Despite the jank and the bevy of technical problems and the fact that it never seems to take full advantage of any of its great ideas, when this game was going it was GOING and for LARGE chunks of the game, too.
So even if I can't in good conscience rate it any higher, I do not regret playing this. I just wish this could have had another 6-ish months of dev time to iron everything out.
So even if I can't in good conscience rate it any higher, I do not regret playing this. I just wish this could have had another 6-ish months of dev time to iron everything out.
Oh my god can you two fucking KISS ALREADY OH MY GOD-
Mario doesn't speak Italian gibberish in this version so it's an objectively worse version of the game I haven't played. Smh scamtendo..............
2024
This game is Quadruple Ass.
I am so glad I don't have to play this at launch. I played the open beta and an even earlier version about 6 months ago. The two versions were identical, and all accounts are saying that nothing has changed from the beta and the final game meaning I can talk about what I played.
That is, to say, a baffling regression from the 11-year-old AC: Black Flag. A game where 95% of all actions are done in your ship, only stepping out at specific ports to buy items and accept menial side quests. A game where you do all of the combat, exploration, and SURVIVAL MECHANICS in your ship. A truly baffling game that is so clearly limping out of development hell, and you can see it in every aspect of the game.
You can tell this game was going to have some sort of story at some point, but it just.. doesn't. I sometimes complain about RPGs that have a main quest that feels like a bunch of side quests duct-taped together but that's LITERALLY what this is. There is no overarching storyline, no interesting characters, NOTHING. Just awkwardly presented window dressing for you to do boring open-world quests that either ask you to find some materials kill a couple of ships or some flavor of those two.
It doesn't help that the game doesn't look that great either. There are moments where the visuals look pleasing like during a sunset, but the closer you are to the visuals the crustier and less defined they look, made all the worse when you see just how BUGGY this game is. There were so many opportunities to fix the bugs from the previous times I've played this game and we got NOTHING. Audio bugs, visual bugs, frame drops, server crashes, game crashes, the whole shebang. I have reported at least 8 of the bugs that still show up in the final product of this $70 Quadruple-A game.
The open-world and survival bullshit is not frustrating, but it is incredibly monotonous. Ship controls are generally janky and the process of mining for loot, using it to upgrade your ship, and increasing your infamy level CAN be super rewarding if it weren't for several baffling design decisions like the fact that you have to do ALL of that in your ship. But the other big one is that.. that's the extent of the game.
It's not deep enough to invest all your time into, but it takes the place of an interesting story, actual quests that mean anything, out-of-ship exploration, all of it. While it may have some nice music and there are brief moments where the stars align and the gameplay loop is decently engaging and interesting, it just doesn't make up for everything that was lost. It's just an objectively lesser version of a PART of Black Flag, stuffed with microtransactions and shoved onto stores for $70. What an embarrassing turnout from Ubisoft.
I am so glad I don't have to play this at launch. I played the open beta and an even earlier version about 6 months ago. The two versions were identical, and all accounts are saying that nothing has changed from the beta and the final game meaning I can talk about what I played.
That is, to say, a baffling regression from the 11-year-old AC: Black Flag. A game where 95% of all actions are done in your ship, only stepping out at specific ports to buy items and accept menial side quests. A game where you do all of the combat, exploration, and SURVIVAL MECHANICS in your ship. A truly baffling game that is so clearly limping out of development hell, and you can see it in every aspect of the game.
You can tell this game was going to have some sort of story at some point, but it just.. doesn't. I sometimes complain about RPGs that have a main quest that feels like a bunch of side quests duct-taped together but that's LITERALLY what this is. There is no overarching storyline, no interesting characters, NOTHING. Just awkwardly presented window dressing for you to do boring open-world quests that either ask you to find some materials kill a couple of ships or some flavor of those two.
It doesn't help that the game doesn't look that great either. There are moments where the visuals look pleasing like during a sunset, but the closer you are to the visuals the crustier and less defined they look, made all the worse when you see just how BUGGY this game is. There were so many opportunities to fix the bugs from the previous times I've played this game and we got NOTHING. Audio bugs, visual bugs, frame drops, server crashes, game crashes, the whole shebang. I have reported at least 8 of the bugs that still show up in the final product of this $70 Quadruple-A game.
The open-world and survival bullshit is not frustrating, but it is incredibly monotonous. Ship controls are generally janky and the process of mining for loot, using it to upgrade your ship, and increasing your infamy level CAN be super rewarding if it weren't for several baffling design decisions like the fact that you have to do ALL of that in your ship. But the other big one is that.. that's the extent of the game.
It's not deep enough to invest all your time into, but it takes the place of an interesting story, actual quests that mean anything, out-of-ship exploration, all of it. While it may have some nice music and there are brief moments where the stars align and the gameplay loop is decently engaging and interesting, it just doesn't make up for everything that was lost. It's just an objectively lesser version of a PART of Black Flag, stuffed with microtransactions and shoved onto stores for $70. What an embarrassing turnout from Ubisoft.
I am so glad this exists, even if there isn't that much for people who aren't in on the bit and it doesn't have a super unique identity.
2024
Every game in history should contain a realistic dog as a playable character.
Finally, after all this time, Persona 3 is a good game! Yeah this kinda fixed almost every single problem with the original Persona 3 and added so much that it basically feels like a new game. The cutscenes look amazing now, both with an improved Royal visual style and the 2D cutscenes looking absolutely incredible. The voice acting is done amazingly well, and the combat is GOOD now with multiple new features including the ability to control your other party members FINALLY. The dorm visually and sonically is fairly neutered compared to the OG, but the rest of the new songs and tartarus areas look great and... oh yeah...
See, the one thing holding this game back from the 10/10 it was so close to getting was Tartarus. It's definitely not AS boring, but i don't know, I still didn't really vibe with it. The structure just doesn't work for me and we spend enough of the game in there that it definitely detracts from it a little bit. I'd argue about the fact that The Answer and FeMC aren't here but one would be such a massive undertaking that it would nearly double the work they'd need to do, and the other is not only getting worked on as DLC apparently, but also sucks!
Regardless of these flaws, Persona 3 Reload is a near flawless remake that finally makes this game reach its full potential, giving you a fun, content-rich, visually-masterful, sonically-masterful, and incredibly deep avenue to experience what very well may be the best story ever put into a Role-Playing game, now with such an improved presentation that old scenes I experienced a while ago hit a whole lot different now. It fucking hurts man.
And the best part? This may not be the last great atlus RPG we get this year. We are so back.
Finally, after all this time, Persona 3 is a good game! Yeah this kinda fixed almost every single problem with the original Persona 3 and added so much that it basically feels like a new game. The cutscenes look amazing now, both with an improved Royal visual style and the 2D cutscenes looking absolutely incredible. The voice acting is done amazingly well, and the combat is GOOD now with multiple new features including the ability to control your other party members FINALLY. The dorm visually and sonically is fairly neutered compared to the OG, but the rest of the new songs and tartarus areas look great and... oh yeah...
See, the one thing holding this game back from the 10/10 it was so close to getting was Tartarus. It's definitely not AS boring, but i don't know, I still didn't really vibe with it. The structure just doesn't work for me and we spend enough of the game in there that it definitely detracts from it a little bit. I'd argue about the fact that The Answer and FeMC aren't here but one would be such a massive undertaking that it would nearly double the work they'd need to do, and the other is not only getting worked on as DLC apparently, but also sucks!
Regardless of these flaws, Persona 3 Reload is a near flawless remake that finally makes this game reach its full potential, giving you a fun, content-rich, visually-masterful, sonically-masterful, and incredibly deep avenue to experience what very well may be the best story ever put into a Role-Playing game, now with such an improved presentation that old scenes I experienced a while ago hit a whole lot different now. It fucking hurts man.
And the best part? This may not be the last great atlus RPG we get this year. We are so back.
2024
"If this game lives to see the summer of 2025, I will be incredibly shocked."
Between bad controls, mediocre map design, characters that feel more like Vtuber avatars than actual characters, boring multiplayer modes, tedious combat, horrible visual noise, and terrible business practices including terrible microtransactions and AI art, Foamstars is a game that is an absolute mess that people are complaining about for the wrong reasons.
You guys hate this game for being a "Splatoon Ripoff." I hate it because it's just an awful video game. We are not the same.
Between bad controls, mediocre map design, characters that feel more like Vtuber avatars than actual characters, boring multiplayer modes, tedious combat, horrible visual noise, and terrible business practices including terrible microtransactions and AI art, Foamstars is a game that is an absolute mess that people are complaining about for the wrong reasons.
You guys hate this game for being a "Splatoon Ripoff." I hate it because it's just an awful video game. We are not the same.
I literally just finished Season 1 a few days ago so this gave me secondhand embarrassment for yall, you don't DESERVE THIS
I've waited so long for Silent Hill to return with the hope that we might get something on the level of 2 again. I've waited for this moment of the series being active again for years, and now that I know for a fact that Silent Hill isn't dead, I kinda wish it was.
mother.
i have micturated on my sleeping mattress while deep in slumber.
please forgive me.
i have micturated on my sleeping mattress while deep in slumber.
please forgive me.
Nothing Personell, Kid.
Golly gee whilikers I sure do love forced motion controls.