how did Elliot Page and Willem fucking Dafoe get casted in this? did someone have dirt on them? they're both extremely talented, it just doesn't seem right to have them in a game like this. feel very bad for Elliot in particular, David 'crying in the courtroom' Cage went above his usual level of creepy to a more disturbing extreme with him. he infamously got a collection of Elliot's childhood photos and made secret fully-detailed nude models of Elliot against his consent, which is an incredibly fucked up perverted nasty thing to do even for david cage standards - and he's a GAME DIRECTOR who is FRENCH. all for a redbox original DVD movie for PS3.

this was the sickest shit i had ever seen on an ipod in 2010. shame that you can't play these anymore.

mobile games are a joke now. they're made for the sole purpose of harvesting as much cash as possible - whether that be from casual audiences, kids, or the 'people' who play gacha games and let themselves become more beast than man. but for a brief time, mobile gaming had promise. quick, cute, arcade-styled games ruled the market and weren't squarely focused on scamming you, but there wasn't really a substantive, impressive title for mobile. until THIS came out. this shit was nuts, at the time. it had atmosphere, actual gameplay, cool visuals - at the time i thought this was the future of mobile games. this was a bright, shining testament to the ingenuity possible in the mobile games market. now, it isn't even playable any more. lost to time in a sea of fuckin kim kardashian wait 14 hours to build a store games, banished into nothingness while anime girls get slightly naked if you pay several hundred dollars. shame, really.

smash but it continuously makes me happy. it feels fantastic, its mechanics feel so much better than smash in a way that's simultaneously simpler and more complex. I LOVE the lack of ledges so much, the alternative recovery options makes edge guarding much more viable and fun. YOU CAN WAVEDASH and it actually feels great. I generally love the cast (Clairen and Elliana are too sick for me not to play) and if you don't like the cast there's infinite additional Steam workshop characters. play as other game characters! play as genuinely cool OCs that feel thought out and fit in the game aesthetically and lorewise! play as someone's weird self indulgent OC! play the game or die



and it has a really good Geno workshop character which is the closest i'll ever get to happiness

fucked up how they hid a decent game behind all of its worst levels. the opening part is a cramped slog with the most tiny and annoying enemies in the game, but it actually gets pretty fun afterwards provided you turn off the NPC escort mechanics. doesn't help that you start with the least satisfying weapons too, there's some really neat ones later on. i'll always defend the rocket jump shotgun in particular, you just know John Romero was tired of taking splash damage in deathmatch and made it that way just for himself. the story is dog ass, but it's also really funny and has Superfly Johnson, so really who can say if it's good or not? it isn't. but if it was widely considered good and successful, Romero would've never been humbled and we would be living in the timeline where both Romero and Carmack are evil.

oh. oh my god. oh. oh nooo. so this game got taken down by the devs because a furry pedo worked on it, who's fetishes were blatantly strewn into the game. There's a weird settlement of horny lizard people who are very aggravating to listen to. There's a companion that's a young woman slave that you can have a horrific, discord groomer esque relationship with. There's dialogue from said slave girl about how stinky and smelly her feet are.

and worst of all, there's this.
https://youtu.be/JiA3t7c9voU
i cannot explain how painful it is to witness this part of the game, i can only share it with you and apologize. this has got to be the most embarrassing thing I've ever seen in a video game. HOW. Like, you could at least make them sentient intelligent creatures!!! i can't say for certain if this was really all this one specific furry's fault, it seems insane for an entire team to not catch this and take issue with it, but dawg WHY would you put that in your militaristic Fallout mod????

aside from that, this just isn't very good. the writing is verrrryyy poor, there's a lot of odd combat/narrative set pieces that do not fit in with the game, and overall it feels unfocused and misguided. i truly do not know why one would want to make an action-heavy game full of linear, CoD-esque setpieces and put it in Fallout: New Vegas of all games. extremely impressive game, though. what they manage to do technically on this engine is marvelous.

i really don't know why Swery is so focused on telling stories about trans people, it's clearly coming from a place of goodwill so there is that, but thankfully this is EASILY the least bad one he's done. compared to Deadly Premonition 2 it is, uh, not Deadly Premonition 2. still, i find its story kinda surface-level. i'm sure it hits hard for cis people and babyqueers but as someone who transitioned like eight years ago it just doesn't have the nuance i'm looking for in this sort of story. it was really buggy, tho that was on the Switch version (which you should probably avoid if you care about performance as well.) The game itself is a decent, lots of pretty rudimentary puzzles involving you mutilating yourself and using your body parts as puzzle pieces. I like those gory aspects, it's like a transgender Mr. Bones, but i'm kinda iffy on how they relate to the narrative. coming out and finding yourself can be dangerous, it can be scary and freaky, but there's a triumphant joy to that shit which i don't think this game captures. that's defo a 'your mileage may vary' type thing but the game not being made by a trans person makes me really dislike it. too simple, too dour, too obvious. it gets close, it's an earnest shot, but it doesn't do it for me.