I guess I want to put a review of the first and second together as, plot wise as well, they are a complementary piece. These two games are hard to explain for people who do not go through what the main character has.

I'm not saying "oh you can't understand the true nature of this game" but I feel a lot of people have or will play these games and truly not fully relate/understand with her problems and thoughts. There was many times in both these games where I had the exact same coping mechanisms and thought processes as the main character. Hell even the "player character"s voice is honestly my inner monologue doing shit in my day to day life.

Me and the main characters experiences are different in many ways but in a lot of regards the way we cope with pain, with the things that happen to us, with abuse, are very similar. Like as someone who is autistic, the way her story trail off constantly, how she repeats the same things, how she imagines her thoughts as other people and living things, the way she interacts with unrestricted access to her laptop, and how she sees her own mother are very reminisces to things that I do and how I interact with the world. I think these games can be a good lesson on how to see mentally ill people and how to not say certain things to them, and how to be patient and understanding with them. Overall very good and I think people should give this game a chance!

Coming back to this game after so many years, I'm quite impressed still. I've rarely seen a puzzle game where every level feels so unique. You never do the same thing twice just harder. Instead, every single level has a unique twist and the developers obviously had a lot of fun coming up with crazy designs.

But that's not the only great thing about this game. The crazy world this creates which I assume is the same world as all the future Tomorrow Corporation games are set in, the fantastic music which is way too epic for a puzzle game, the whole style which is bizarre and beautiful at the same time, and the anti-corporation theme which was ultimately even embedded in the developer's name. It's just a fantastic package of goo!

As the only clown on this website who has played the whole game (in one sitting right at release to secure a free Pickle Rick back bling in Fortnite), I can say with confidence High on Life is dreadfully weak. And that's a bit of a shame since it theoretically has good bones.

The most glaring problem is, of course, the dialogue. The pre-release comparison to Borderlands 3 is apt as characters literally do not cease their oral spew, and you are forced to listen to them before you can progress at key points. Borderlands has ameliorated this in part with the ECHOnet transmissions, keeping you apprised of plot elements as you messed about on Pandora. Save for key story moments, the dialogue therein is accompanied by your mad dash for loot and slaughter. High on Life quivers in its boots at the mere thought that you might miss a single phoneme. There is no means to skip dialogue. There is no opportunity to play the game when characters are talking. If you are not physically glued in place, you are locked in a distraction-less room. And should you dare to break from the tedium of a suburban hardwood floor and off-white walls by heading upstairs, you are scolded by your guns to pay attention. In a properly written, compelling narrative this would be fine, but a substantial chunk of the game is NPCs yammering incessantly. Fake arguments become auditory static, the white noise penetrated only by mention of racism, misogyny, or a cavalcade of 'fuck's. Does a holstered gun have something to say? Worry not, they'll speak to you over radio. That there is so much dialogue is rather interesting in and of itself, particularly seeing how your different weaponry will engage in conversations with NPCs, but there is not a moment where speech is not occurring. The only moment of respite is if you stay in place.

And some of the writing is passable, some even bordering on good. But it never comes out of Justin Roiland's many mouths. The closest I came to cracking a smile was when Zach Hadel, Michael Cusack, Rich Evans, Jay Bauman, Mike Stoklasa, or Tom Kenny was the focus. In a vacuum, some of their witticisms might have earned a chuckle or at least a considered exhale, but these moments are paltry oases after being duped by an infinitude of mirages. You know in your bones that a joke will not be allowed to stand on its own, and that Roiland or his other hack voice 'actors' will need to get their own two cents in. It is a Reddit comment thread not only in content, but in presentation, someone always retelling the above poster's joke but worse. In Roiland's world, stuttering is a feature, not a bug. His stammering makes Porky Pig seem eloquent. A one-take wonder.

"Is the gameplay good?" This question was asked more times than I can count during my marathon. As I emphatically repeated there, "no." There's a weightlessness to every second of combat that betrays the animations and premise of your guns being living things. There is more weight, more oomph, more impact to Spore's creature stage combat than there is to this gunplay. Your bullets genuinely feel as if they are lobbed foam balls. The only times at which there is some punch is when detonating sigh Sweezy's crystals with her charge shot. I can't tell if it's all a consequence of your enemies being shrouded in goop or not. Your shots take away the goop to expose their regular flesh, but this somehow imparts little feedback. Is it because there is so much flash and bedlam occurring that I can't even tell where and when my shots are landing? I have no idea. At the very least the juggling of enemies is semi-novel (even if it comes after Kenny begs lustfully for me to use his 'Trickhole'), and Creature is semi-satisfying if only because you can launch his children and go find a quiet[er] corner to recuperate mentally in. You get some basic manoeuvrability upgrade which makes this a Metr- Search Action game in some sense when coupled with returning to planets to find extra cash. You can upgrade your weapons and unlock modifiers for them but the changes are so minute I couldn't really tell how much of an impact they were having. What the mods do do is change the colour of your weapons. Given that so much of your screen real estate is occupied by their "beautiful dick-sucking lip" visages, this is the most substantial alteration you can make.

The music is like Temporary Secretary by Paul McCartney but bad.

Visually there is something of value here (in theory). While many of the alien inhabitants blend together with their amorphous sausage anatomies, the unique NPCs typically bear striking designs. Sweezy notwithstanding, the guns are cute as well, even if I feel Kenny is perpetually doing the Dreamworks smirk. Kenny and Gus' iron sights are adorable, and the way Gus clamps onto your hand indoors melts my heart. Creature reminds me of that Skylander that had the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon. Inoffensive! Until you see his actual full model and you realise he has three tits and a prolapsed anus for a barrel. And Gus looks like he has a turtle's cock.

Errant thoughts:

Boy howdy is there a lot of mpreg talk.

One of the scenes you can warp in is a movie theatre where you can watch all of Demon Wind with the RLM crew. That would be okay but I don't think the MST3K style commentary works for a film that belongs in a Best of the Worst episode. There's a reason why they show you fragments of them watching it, and why their film commentaries are for more compelling films.

There is so much overlapping of dialogue that I genuinely got a headache that intensified over the game. A horror during a Tylenol shortage in Canada.

I put more effort into gathering my thoughts than they did making this shit.

I wish that I had always been in a grave.

thinking about the types of people who worked on this game and the types of people who okayed every decision made on this game and the types of people who this game was made for and i feel nothing for any of these people but pure contempt. fuck this game and fuck everything it stands for. it is a repulsive pile of soulless pink glittery filth. it is nothing short of nauseating to look at, to listen to, or to play. the game grumps are in this and it's not even the most upsetting/annoying part of it. i've literally never hit the "skip cutscene" button on a first playthrough before i played this game. but in the end i'm not really sure why i did, because the actual game sandwiched between these F-tier 2012 tumblr comic voiceovers sucks, too! as if it couldn't get any worse it's a fucking terrible beat-em-up! i don't even understand how they got it so wrong! the people at wayforward have obviously played a lot of old games, they should know how this stuff works, but they seem to have fucking forgotten, so you're left to trudge through a broken mess of non-functional juggles, pointless backtracking and some of the worst bosses i've ever has the displeasure of fighting in a video game. i think i'd rather play any beat em up than this. hell, give me Bad Dudes and i'd probably have a better time. anyway did you know this game's sequel which released a week ago has chris niosi in it? thought that was cool and interesting