bwoe
2023
Fuck Microsoft, fuck Phil Spencer, fuck the entire gaming industry, and you know what, fuck gaming in general. I'm gonna go try a different hobby.
1993
π£οΈ ππππΌ πΌπππΌβπππβ
π€ yer time has been extended!
Daytona USA might lack the best handling, content or track design, but it more than makes up for it in classic Sega charm. From the attract screen to the game over jingle, every ounce of the game's presentation and mood is memorable. Befitting its accessible and friendly 'hanging out with the bros at the bowling alley arcade' nature, it's pure 90s motorsport pop art in video game form - there is quite few like it.
π€ yer time has been extended!
Daytona USA might lack the best handling, content or track design, but it more than makes up for it in classic Sega charm. From the attract screen to the game over jingle, every ounce of the game's presentation and mood is memorable. Befitting its accessible and friendly 'hanging out with the bros at the bowling alley arcade' nature, it's pure 90s motorsport pop art in video game form - there is quite few like it.
2015
A traffic management and corpse transportation simulator disguised as a city builder.
"The Most Unwanted Song" is slightly under twenty-two minutes long. Lead singer Dina Emerson raps lyrics about the American frontier in an operatic voice. The narrator of the song is a cowboy who kills wild animals with a knife, lassos cows, and rides through the wilderness "wild and free". The cowboy rests by reading philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein's 1921 work Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus and pondering his philosophy of language. After singing a verse about Wittgenstein in German, he returns home to make love to Miss Kitty, shoots a suspicious stranger, and fights "Injuns" in order to build a grocery store on their land that will sell American cheese. Emerson's verses are repeatedly interrupted by a children's choir that describes various holidays and urges listeners to call their relatives and shop at Walmart, and by several sections of dissonant free improvisation designated in the score as "slams". Towards the end of the song, Mankin shouts various political terms and slogans into a megaphone over harp-driven "elevator music", followed by a unison "folk song" refrain. According to Soldier, there were less than 200 people in the world who could be expected to like "The Most Unwanted Song" at the time of writing.
2017
We could have had Ninja Gaiden Souls.
Instead we got Nioh, Nioh 2, Chinese Nioh and Final Fantasy Nioh. May God smite Team Ninja.
Instead we got Nioh, Nioh 2, Chinese Nioh and Final Fantasy Nioh. May God smite Team Ninja.
1997
Aw hell naw who put EinstΓΌrzende Neubauten in my arcade shmup
1995
A forgettable entry in the SNK fighting canon that will only be remembered for having the hardest promo art ever to exist.
This might be the only 2D fighting sequel released in the past few years (as of 2022) which actually gives the player more options rather than the opposite. KOF holds the line.
I want to hate this but I'm too nostalgic for shitty Newgrounds art and OCRemix to do so.
Also it's the first fighting game with rollback netcode ever, put some respect on the OG
Also it's the first fighting game with rollback netcode ever, put some respect on the OG
2009
75% of the assets are completely stolen, and yet this still manages to have some of the most soul I've ever seen put into an indie video game. Long live Dong Dong.
2002
There is no comfortable way to play this game. Your only options are:
1) Get an OG Xbox, whose hardware are ticking time bombs and looks like shit on modern TVs
2) Play it on 360, which has poor backwards compatibility and is full of framedrops
3) Upgrade your PC (during a component shortage) so it can handle Xbox emulation, which is still in its relative infancy so hiccups are expected
Fuck you Sega, why did you lose the source code to all your best games, I hate you so fucking much
1) Get an OG Xbox, whose hardware are ticking time bombs and looks like shit on modern TVs
2) Play it on 360, which has poor backwards compatibility and is full of framedrops
3) Upgrade your PC (during a component shortage) so it can handle Xbox emulation, which is still in its relative infancy so hiccups are expected
Fuck you Sega, why did you lose the source code to all your best games, I hate you so fucking much
One of the greatest PS2 fighters of all time.
2008
Released as freeware only two years before the Steam/Xbox Live indie game boom of the early 2010s, Iji missed out on a LOT of attention and it stings. So ahead of its time it's insane.
1989
When it comes to "technical milestones in gaming history", we think about our Dooms, or Star Foxes, our Mario 64s, our FF7s. But never does Ys Book I & II come up.
This was an epic 20-hour two-part RPG with animated cutscenes, fully-fledged professional voice acting in both Japanese and English, arranged OST using real CD instruments, and extensive side content all in 1989. A 500MB game in a time when games rarely exceeded 500KB. And it was all done by a small Japanese studio. This is one for the history books and it's a shame it doesn't get the respect the deserves.
As for the game itself, though? Haha, bump combat go BRRRRRRBRBRBRBRRRBRRBRR
This was an epic 20-hour two-part RPG with animated cutscenes, fully-fledged professional voice acting in both Japanese and English, arranged OST using real CD instruments, and extensive side content all in 1989. A 500MB game in a time when games rarely exceeded 500KB. And it was all done by a small Japanese studio. This is one for the history books and it's a shame it doesn't get the respect the deserves.
As for the game itself, though? Haha, bump combat go BRRRRRRBRBRBRBRRRBRRBRR
Smash babbies are not ready for Tekken inputs.