Tasty audiovisual climbing experience. A great payoff for anyone who wished Uncharted's climbing took effort.

Ends sooner than you might like it to, but exactly as soon as it needs to, given the actual mechanical scope of the thing. Eight hours or more with these mechanics would probably have players cursing the fiddliness, or growing annoyed at the swinging, or something.

goofy ass video game. yeah i dunno man it's fine
enemies that die real good? great. levels you won't get horribly lost in? great. the experience is kinda hollowed out by a weird, kinda flat difficulty curve with pretty dull bossfights. i played on "hard" with a controller, since, you know, n64.

The eerily slow, underwater-feeling movement, the deceptively sluggish combat, the minor mistakes and gotchas that set you back half an hour or more, even the brazen lack of mechanical transparency... it's all here, folks.

Cleared Normal and Hard championships.
Racing you can really sink your teeth into. Makes the act of jetskiing a visceral thing.

Brilliant, enthralling storytelling.
Most of the mechanical difficulty comes from not being able to see shit through the particle effects, though. Maybe I shouldn't have pushed the game beyond what my poor 2070 could handle, but it just looked too good, man.

Neat. Story wore off on me past the halfway point, though.
Does a good job of keeping a constant forward momentum, but the things you're going forward through do start to blend together once you see all the pieces used.

It's nearly impossible to play this game without being sucked into the lumpy, spongey combat, somehow. Why bother going out there to explore and discover new things, if all that's really out there is a bunch of people waiting to be shot fifteen times before flopping over?

The real video games.

Hyperactive goofball game that focuses on exactly what it wants to and literally nothing else.

If you're filtered by this one, you're not worthy.

Love watching the narrative design creep into this thing as you slowly get accustomed to its imperfect (not impossible!) handling.

Shinji Mikami originally wanted Resident Evil to be first person.

Extremely clever video game with a great sense of humor. Love it when shooters mess with the player.

Pure theatrical melodrama with genuinely jaw-dropping production value that writes checks its second half can't cash, in combat, plotting, and pacing.
There will be nothing else this generation like the Eikon fights, that's for certain.

Delicious, smooth, goes down easy. Solidly in the upper echelon of retro shooters.

Lego Elden Ring
Doesn't somehow rise above the stat scaling plateau issue or surface level combat of the previous game, but it sure as hell doesn't need to. Lots of pure joy in this thing.