Like so many, I enjoyed my time with the original Stanley Parable, which underscores how truly disappointed I am with its sequel. Where the first game teemed with originality, The Stanley Parable 2 is dull, uninspired, and often insulting to its fan base. Rather than expand on what made the first game enjoyable, the sequel veers off into territory nobody asked for. An infinitely deep hole? Who cares? Where are the new endings? What about enjoyable bits from The Stanley Parable 1, like the Adventure Line? Instead, we get an uninspired sidequest collecting figurines. Even this diversion feels incomplete: collecting all the figurines gives you nothing! I must say though, I found the bucket to be quite comforting, a welcome reprieve from

Imagine if Aerith had Groot in her party, would've saved her a lot of trouble! You can't tell me this isn't in the FFVII universe with Lady Hellbender's pets looking like some Advent Children ass dogs.

Seriously though, I am joining the chorus of people saying that this game is surprisingly good! It captures the feeling of the movies spectacularly, while obviously drawing from its own lore. How comic accurate it is I can't say, as like most people I'm mainly familiar with this stuff through the MCU. The combat could definitely use some polishing which is why this is a four star rather than five star game for me. The fundamentals are there for something great, but as is, the hits lack the kind of impact that I'd expect from a AAA experience. Your team attacks feel good especially once you get multiple AOE attacks that launch enemies around, although if they added even more umph to them I think it'd sell the impact even more. Your most basic attack however, shooting your twin pistols as Starlord, lacks any kind of physical reaction from the enemies whatsoever. Thankfully, the game is much more frequently about well paced story beats and exploration of absolutely gorgeous worlds. Top notch art direction going on here. I'd be very excited if they made a sequel to this and gave the combat that extra push it needs to be great, and maybe add even more unique non-combat gameplay moments, of which this game has a few, and they lend some great flavor that make the game stand out as its own. One last thing that really bugged me, is that there's so much dialogue that happens while you're walking about that will get interrupted by walking into a cutscene/fight/another line of dialogue, and I just can't believe this is still a problem we're having in the 2020's. Please, in a game this dialogue driven, just make your hallways long enough or implement a "as I was saying..." system!

Also, happy 200th review to me!

I like this one for many of the same reasons I liked Secret Little Haven. It's got a lot of nice queer stories that I haven't really seen explored before, especially when it comes to Spring Leaves No Flowers' story about an asexual and aromantic character discovering that about themselves. All the stories have very sweet and positive relationships which I loved. I almost expect for something awful to happen in these kinds of stories as a sort of "look how awful the world is!" and so when you expect the awful thing to happen and it turns out that characters are more understanding than you might have feared, it's real nice!

This is the first time I've ever really been thoroughly disappointed with a mainline entry in the Halo series. The easiest way to tell this is just by the fact that it's the only campaign in the series that I played for a bit, put down, and then didn't return to until months later. Usually I binge the campaigns of these games in a couple of sittings. A lot of this is due to the fact that rather than having a carefully curated series of levels, they gave this game the dreaded Ubisoft Open World treatment. So many hours of going around a very bland open world that isn't even nice to look at, and fighting to take over very samey feeling bases to capture, before I engaged with anything even slightly interesting in the story. Not that Halo Infinite has much of a story to offer at all.

Apparently the story of Halos 4 and 5 weren't crowd pleasers, but I liked the arc they were headed in. While the original trilogy had a lot to do with religious fanaticism and the evils that can be perpetrated under such faith; 4 and 5 dealt a lot with the evils that could be perpetrated with unethical science. This all culminated in Halo 5's ending, in which Cortana, a military created AI, decides to take over the galaxy in what she views as an attempt to use superior AI intelligence to govern peace across the galaxy, and exterminate anyone who resists. Also in the ending of Halo 5, we are teased with Master Chief encountering Dr. Halsey for the first time in who knows how many years. A doctor who oversaw the Spartan program which kidnapped children and experimented on them in order to transform the ones who survived into rebellion-crushing super-soldiers for the UNSC.

Halo Infinite drops all of these themes that had built up over the previous two games in order to shove in a cartoonish (even for Halo) villain who leads a faction that you have not heard of unless you had played Halo Wars 2. The game starts in media res with Master Chief getting utterly destroyed by a character we do not know, in the midst of an attack we know nothing about. And it's with this jarring introduction that we realize that everything interesting we had expected to follow-up Halo 5, has already happened off-screen in between games. So yeah, Cortana had gathered every AI in existence to launch a successful coup against every government in the galaxy, took control over the Halo rings, and had planet destroying weapons at her disposal, and she just got taken down between games. The player has no part in it, nor do they have any part in any kind of confrontation between Dr. Halsey and Master Chief. This is like if they had ended Halo 2 with "What are you doing, Chief?" "Sir, finishing this fight." and then in Halo 3 you discover that they finished the fight in between games and now the Didact is whooping your ass and you never got any buildup as to who he is. This game leans a lot harder into the emotional relationship between Master Chief and his new Cortana than any of the previous games did. But again, this would have been much more interesting had it been done with the Cortana we already know and who already had an unfinished arc set up for her to complete in this game.

One last quick thought on the primary antagonist you spend most of this game in competition with, and his astonishing levels of one-noteness. When you finally beat this guy in a boss fight, Master Chief kind of gingerly sets him down and is asked to "Tell them, I died well." and when your companion who you were rescuing sees this, he asks you why you treated him with respect in death, when he was so monstrous to you. To which Master Chief responds: "Yes. But at the end he was just a soldier. Hoping he'd done the right thing. Questioning his choices." and all I can say is that's a hell of an assumption to make there, Chief! We as the players really only know this guy as a genocidal maniac who is willing to let countless of his own men die bringing us to him. If I'm being generous I guess I could say that at this point we know that Cortana had death-starred his home-world and so perhaps he views exterminating humanity as an act of protection for his people, but that's being really generous. If the game had given us literally any indication that this dude was not twirling his figurative mustache every moment of the day, then Chief's words might have landed with any impact at all, but as it is that was just a incredibly weird thing for him to say.

Apart from the story and the Ubisoft Open Worldification of Halo, I've only really got one major thing to say about the mechanics and difficulty balancing of the campaign. The reason I've only got one big thing to say, is that the fully upgraded grapple hook is so unbelievably broken that once I got it, I could melee my way through all of Heroic difficulty. It feels good to use but it's detrimental on a larger scale because it also makes every encounter feel very one-note as I rarely had to use any other tactic to win a fight. It actually turns grunts into the most threatening enemy for a large portion of the game oddly enough, only because they will sometimes whip out a plasma grenade as you're zipping towards them.

Multiplayer in this game is fine. I come back to play fiesta whenever I need to kill some time and it's fun enough because Halo mechanics have just always felt really good to play with. But there's not a whole lot of innovation here I feel like, especially when you're comparing the leap between other games in the series. The equipment is there and as everyone will tell you, the grapple hook is a standout that turns you into Spartan-Spider-Man, but it's not like you have that equipped most of the time in multiplayer. Multiplayer also lacks a lot of the more fun and unconventional modes I loved in previous games. Aside from fiesta, you're not going to find anything like shotty-snipers or rocket race in here as of yet.