74 Reviews liked by OnyxPriest


This is a horrendously painful game that is almost begging to be save scummed. I will personally kidnap every developer, tie them to a chair, and force them to watch boring French art house movies for three days straight so they can feel even a fraction of the pain I experienced playing this pure torture.
10/10 go play it, it's excellent. I love the gore, unique boss fights, and destructible environments.

revisiting wii games is crazy cause i'll think "dang nintendo games got really stale in this era" and then remember it moved like eleven billion copies

This review contains spoilers

It's a Persona game that's for sure. This enhanced version of the original is fleshed out with new Confidants, Personas, Arcanas, and a new ending boss. Honestly the game itself is very good, but that's standard for a Persona game. It's got some really nice exploration that's more fleshed out than in previous Persona games, and the motif of rebellion is a pleasant addition. The combat is some good ole turn based action with some little twists and wrinkles with Baton Passes, it even has some "negotiating" like in SMT proper. Music is actually really nice for the most part although in comparison to other SMT games, I'm not as impressed. The game does have a tendency to overstay it's welcome with all the cutscenes being super long and all the "but this is the actual final boss" stuff. The cast itself isn't super memorable outside of Futaba and I never really felt they meshed together that well. Also, not a huge fan of the story and it's beats and the bosses are pretty damn easy. In fact, I played the game on hard and had no trouble sans the Okumura fight. You become horrifyingly overpowered especially when you can just completely avoid encounters in Mementos (thank God, I would still be playing if I couldn't avoid the encounters). I would be remised if I didn't mention a lot of the weird relationships you can enter with people in this game. Your character is still a minor so... it's pretty creepy how you can date teachers, doctors, and people quite a bit older than you. Still, a very enriching experience, although I will continue to gravitate towards Persona 4.

Another fantastic Persona experience. Although it lacks the scope of Persona 3 or Persona 5 in terms of story, it more than makes up for it in its simplified yet addictive gameplay and absolutely stellar cast. Although the story isn't as grand and is more light hearted than it's predecessor, the chemistry between the cast members is Incredible and it honestly feels like a group of friends perhaps helped by the stellar VA work. Although the battles are not as robust as in 3 or 5, the simplified system works to it's advantage creating less of a grind in the middle to late game, and the dungeons have some really killer music as well. In speaking on Golden, the added social links are a very welcome surprise as well as the scooter and the night expansions certainly makes the non dungeon sections more interesting than the base game. The game does suffer from being WAY TOO easy, even on harder difficulties, especially when you get further along and get access to the Fox also there's some story elements that may rub other players the wrong way especially with the identity issues of Kanji and Naoto often being played for laughs. Again, a lot of SMT and early Persona players balk at 4 for it's light-heartedness and the easiness of the game, but fans of Persona 5 may gravitate towards this one especially with the stellar cast which really makes the experience.

the massive attack reference went right over all our ten-year-old heads

why does josh allen look exactly like the stop skeletons from fighting guy

There really isn't much to say other than this is the standard set for all 3D platformers. It was outstanding in 1996, it is still outstanding today save for a couple of stars that are annoying and some levels being snoozefests. I ended up getting all 120 stars in this playthrough which honestly lasted 6-7 hours. Tight controls, fun moveset, and a end credits theme that is top 5 of all time.

While Metroid Prime for the original GameCube is a certified banger and a half, this Remaster, in my eyes, is the definitive version of the game. The updated graphics look amazing even in handheld mode, music is still incredible, the spring jump is a nice addition from the original, and the fact you can choose from 4 different control types makes this experience truly fantastic. I must admit, I absolutely blow at FPS anything and I strongly dislike the genre in general, but Prime Remastered is a very strong exception. Hoping Echoes Remastered is also a certified banger 😁

Revisited this classic SNES game again and it is still phenomenal. It's a title that has a lot going for it, impeccable music, 6 playable characters, 3 different storylines, bosses aplenty, a class change system, and stunning late SNES graphics. I have not only emulated this in the past, but I also own this via the Collection of Mana on Switch. There's really not much to say other than every RPG fan worth their salt should give this game a chance. A fantastic and challenging experience that only loses points for the ??? Seed hunting that occurs in the last third of the game.

To the 13 people who rated this game 5 stars...

What the hell is wrong with you

Castlevania: The Adventure, while not a terrible game by any means, wasn’t really all that good. Yeah, it did set the foundation for how a Castlevania game could work when placed onto a handheld, but it was plagued down by a sluggish and annoying execution, filled with a slow-as-hell movement speed, a severe lack of sub-weapons, terrible level design, and paths in levels meant to deliberately waste your time. At least the game had pretty good music, but then again, most Castlevania games do have great music, so that isn’t really all that much to be excited about. It’s a shame though that it turned out the way it did, but the handheld train wasn’t about to stop right there anytime soon, not even in terms of the original Game Boy. Just a mere two years later, we were then given a sequel by Konami known as Castlevania II: Belmont’s Revenge. Not sure why it’s not called something like Castlevania: The Adventure II, but that title is dumb, so I can excuse this.

As a direct sequel to Castlevania: The Adventure, thankfully, this game improves on what that game established in just about every way, and turned out to be pretty good. Would I say it is on the same level as the original Castlevania or Castlevania III in terms of quality? No, but it is without a doubt the superior of the two games, even if it does still carry some of the grievances of that original game.

The story this time is NOT just about killing Dracula, but also saving your son, so that helps flesh things out a little more, the graphics are Game Boy graphics, and the sprites don’t seem too different from The Adventure’s sprites for me to notice any change, so no need to discuss that further, the music is still pretty good, the control is about the same as the original, but it is an improvement in terms of the movement, and the gameplay is what you would expect from 2D Castlevania, but again, it is a pretty good improvement on the original game.

The game is your typical 2D Castlevania game, where you travel through multiple stages, defeat many gothic themed enemies, gather items and upgrades for your whip, and take on challenging bosses. In terms of gameplay changes and additional features, not too much was changed from the original, but there are new additions that do make the game more fun overall. First and foremost, we have sub-weapons again!........... two of them. Just the holy water and the axe (or the cross, but only in the Japanese version for some reason), which kind of sucks, but hey, it is better than no sub-weapons at all, THE ADVENTURE. Also, this game also pulls a Mega Man and gives you the choice of a Stage Select to go about playing the game however you want, which is pretty neat. And…. that’s about it for the changes. Again, not too much different from the original, but the changes are appreciated regardless.

Where this game truly shines, however, is taking many of the problems that Castlevania: The Adventure had and improving on them massively. First, your movement speed is now MUCH quicker, which makes going through the stages a lot less of a time sink, and thank god for that. Sure, it isn’t much faster, but it is the speed that you would expect when playing a Castlevania game. In addition, whenever you get hit, you don’t immediately lose your whip upgrades, the level design is a lot better (but not perfect), there are more stages, some with more story elements, and there is a lot more balancing for boss difficulty. Sure, this doesn’t really sound like all too much, but it really does make a difference in terms of improvement. Not a huge one, but an improvement nonetheless.

That being said, there are still some things that holds the game back from being too good. First and foremost, I didn’t mention this back in my review for Castlevania: The Adventure, as it didn’t bother me that much back then, but here, there are ROPES EVERYWHERE. They are used both for transitioning to other screens as well as gameplay challenges, but just like with stairs in Castlevania III, they are overabundant and can be pretty annoying in terms of trying to avoid taking damage. And secondly, some bosses can be pretty annoying, such as the boss in Stage 5, where you are placed in a very tight corridor with a bone dragon shooting through different parts of the floor. During all of this, the arena is constantly auto-scrolling, and depending on where the bone dragon is placed, you have to have almost perfect movement and precision to avoid taking damage, which isn’t challenging, but instead pretty annoying.

Despite all of this, the game is still pretty good, but like I mentioned earlier, I wouldn’t say this game reaches the same quality as that of Castlevania I or III. Yes, it is still pretty good, but it is only good enough to where I would only call it “the good handheld Castlevania”, and not too much further. That is what Castlevania: The Adventure achieved, but, again… that game sucked, but thankfully this one came to pick up the slack, and I am glad that I went ahead and replayed it after all this time.

Overall, this is a great improvement over the original Game Boy Castlevania game, as well as a pretty good game in general, and I would definitely recommend it for those wanting to see what the Game Boy Castlevanias were all about.

Game #212

Rygar

1986

Video games can turn out to be a lot of things. Some games can become masterpieces that will go on to be remembered and cherished for decades to come. Some games can become the electronic equivalent of a dumpster fire, one that we will mock and laugh at for decades to come, just because of how terrible it is. Some games can leave little-to-no impact whatsoever, and just simply be there for someone to play, have a quick opinion on, and then never touch again. But then there are games that are just nothing, whether it being through lazy gameplay, lackluster execution, or just by simply not giving a shit and releasing a shovelware product in the hopes of getting a quick buck. One example of a “nothing” game would be with the original Rygar for the arcades.

I have known about this game for a while, particularly with the separate NES game, which I have wanted to check out for quite a while. However, seeing how that game came from an arcade game initially, my brain would kill me if I didn’t play through that one first, so I decided to do it, and it is the most “nothing” game that I have ever played in a while. It’s not bad, it’s not good, it just simply fills the role of being a thing that does exist, and god help you if you decide to play it, as it will prove to you just how much of a waste of time it truly is.

The story is pretty detailed for an arcade game, but as per usual, it all devolves into “evil took over, go stop it”, the graphics are pretty good, but something about them don’t really grab me as much as other arcade games, the music is also pretty good, but some of the tracks do get pretty repetitive at points, the control is pretty much what you would expect, with nothing much to say about them except for the jumping being a little heavy, and the gameplay is the crowned jewel of the repetitive gold mine, which just scratches the surface of how much of a “nothing” game this is.

The game is a 2D action platformer, where you go from left to right at all times, defeating MANY enemies using your trusty Diskarmor, which is basically a killer yo-yo, you gain plenty of points and power-ups along the way to make your weaponry stronger, and… that is about it. There is one boss that you fight, but he only shows up right at the end of the game, and it is one of the most pathetic boss fights I have ever seen, where you can easily take him out with three shots of the powered up Diskarmor. Aside from that though, there aren’t anymore changes in the gameplay, and that brings us to how this game is primarily just nothing.

There are 27 levels, or “rounds”, in this game, which sounds like a lot for this type of game, right? Well, it really is not. All of the levels are very short, and all you really have to do for all of the levels is just to run straight to the end while defeating enemies. Sure, there will be points where you will jump across platforms and climb up/down ropes, but for the most part, it is mainly just running while defeating enemies. They try to make up for this monotony by throwing a bunch of enemies at you at once, or as I like to call it, the arcade syndrome (didn’t miss that at all), but that doesn’t make up for anything when most of the enemies can just be ignored and sped past on your way to the end.

Now, with all that being said, it doesn’t sound that much like it would be a vat of nothingness. After all, if it possesses a menacing threat to the player, then there is at least something there to engage with, a challenge to conquer, a threat to overcome! However… that is not the case, as this is probably the most generous arcade game I have ever played. Whenever you die, you respawn right where you did die, even if it is right before the end of the level, and whenever you get a game over and continue with another credit, you ALSO respawn right where you die. So basically, you could just run through the entire game, not giving a fuck, constantly dying and getting game overs, with no consequences on the player whatsoever.

This is officially the point where the game goes from having some semblance of a soul, to it pretty much being just a lifeless corpse. There is absolutely NOTHING here to make the player feel engaged. No challenge, no variety, no satisfaction, no innovation to the genre, NOTHING AT ALL. It feels like Tecmo just looked at a bunch of other similar arcade games at the time, took all the bits and pieces from those games, and stapled them altogether to try to make something out of it, only to make something that retains no value whatsoever. Which is a shame, because the NES game based on this one actually has stuff in it! It has different types of stages, different genres it blends together, exploration elements, and plenty to do without keeping the player bored. To think that all of that came out of a game like THIS… it is just a goddamn miracle.

Overall, while there really isn’t anything fundamentally wrong with this game, I can’t give it anything higher then this rating in good conscience. It is one of the most worthless, meaningless, nothing games that I have ever played in my life, and if it wasn’t for the other games that would come after this one, I probably would never even have considered giving this one a chance. If you ever wanted to check out Rygar, play the NES game or the PS2 remake, because those games actually have things in them, rather just being a game on loop for half an hour. And to think, I was originally gonna spend $8 on this game before I decided to emulate it. Thank god I used my brain for once.

Game #282

Instructions unclear, beat the cartridge with a hammer and then ate it. Was that not what I was supposed to do? It was pretty yummy, but not as tasty as those Switch cartridges.

Game #281

not as good as I or III but a really strong return to form after IV. most of the gameplay changes have thoughtful intent unlike IV where none of them did and the bouncy early red book soundtrack is god-tier.