I never know how to write shit about Mario Party cause like you generally know what the fuck you're getting into with these games. Like there's just not all that much to talk about with it. I do think this one has more than enough content to work towards that is more interesting in actual replayability, the star bank and being able to unlock a map, some more minigames and characters is nice, it's mainly why this was like my childhood MP.

I think the games are absolutely who ya play them with and the little moments ya share with them. So like before I played this with two of my besties (Appreciations and Weatherby) and had pretty great times.

Ya got shit like Bowser Jr hitting a like 3080 on the snowboarding minigame like the cheating little shit he is, us all clowning on Bowser Jr constantly, me losing at that one dogshit bumper car bump-o-rama battle minigame cause the controls are so so so ass, buying cheap wine and just laughing about stupid bullshit happening in game.

Mario Party ain't about Mario Party, it's about chilling with people and slamming back some cheap ass wine while the game itself fucks you over in the dumbest ways possible or clearly sets you up to just lose the entire game. Even if I never play this again I will always keep these memories pretty close to my heart as very special cherished times.

My continued vendetta against Bowser Jr grows stronger with each passing day. One day I'll get him back for stealing 5 of my stars that son of a bitch.

At the risk of using the game journalist's fallback comparison, I just want to say that Crash Bandicoot is really, really hard. This is a do-or-die 3D platformer if I've ever played one. Each individual jump expects commitment. It wants you to be ready to go to college, get married, and raise a family every time you hit that X button. Crash Bandicoot can sense hesitation, and will not hesitate to off himself if he thinks you're not giving it your all. Couple this with fairly repetitive level designs and concepts, and I think this game is just tailor-made to hate you.

I'd accept Crash Bandicoot as a hard game if not for the stupid save system. First you find three severed heads hidden in boxes throughout a stage, then you skim past a bonus stage (that you can fail), and THEN the game blesses you with the opportunity to save your game. Worse yet, the game doesn't remember how many lives you had when you reset it. Slapping a fistful of lives at the beginning of each level doesn't really excuse this fact. Crash is a game where you can lose lives just as fast as you can earn them. Actually, you're probably gonna lose 'em faster if you're like me, someone unfamiliar with Crash's game.

Honestly, I only played this game as a rite of passage for the PS1 kick that I'm currently on. Gotta respect your elders, and boy oh boy, that bandicoot sure has aged. Crushed my ballsicoots.

Ocarina of Time is the quintessential videogame. The influence of OoT over the medium is immeasurable and would grant it a place in history by itself. However, the game is also damn good, and holds up to today's standards.

OoT is a masterclass in both game design and storytelling and lays the foundation to the modern videogame. The item-dungeon loop, the quasi-open world, the hub areas integrated into the worldbuilding aspects and the time-related plot twists and implementation of quests and sidequests integrating the game's main gimmick in such a natural manner were basically the template for most major game created ever since.

The use of soundtrack in ambience and storytelling is also extremely inspired and helps the game in its longstanding legacy. The musical and audio motif introduced in OoT are, in fact, one of the more important factors in the series identity up to the most recent entries.

The Kingdom of Hyrule feels alive, which is a feat and a half considering the technical hurdles of the time. The clever use of hub locations contrasting with the ample Hyrule Fields makes the populated areas feel that more important and full of points of interest.

Locations are, in fact, the most important part of the storytelling in OoT. The dungeons all have some significance that is alluded to but explicitly told - a not pioneering, but definetly daring move at the time. And the identity of the locales merges with the level design, capabilities acquired and soundtrack of the dungeons in a manner seldom replicated from then to now.

The UI and UX factors of the game are harder to evaluate. The field has developed tremendously and OoT utilized dated conventions - which still work, as most average gamers even today can navigate without any issues - but the use of c-buttons to alleviate the clutter of so many tools was a functional and perfectly able solution. The menuing can get quite annoying, especially during areas where the boots are used frequently. The d-pad should-ve been better utilized - and this was one of the first QoL solutions implemented by current-day modders. Hindsight is 20-20, however. During its day, there were few 3D games which utilized solutions as effectively as OoT - the Z-targeting was one of the greatest legacies for gameplay UX, and is now ubiuitous because of the great implementation made by OoT.

The story is an apt retelling of the Chosen One trope. While not groundbreaking as a general motif, the time-travelling twist is extremely effective in its implementation. Link is a blank slate and does not impede the player immersion into the story being told. That is very much a good thing, and contributes to the longevity of the game's enjoyability and it's perpetuity in history.

While being prey to the curse of the early 3D graphics, it is one of the least offensive polygons of the era. The artstyle is fantastical enough to make the graphics not too dated for today's standards - there is a kind of charm in them. Of course, in it's heyday OoT was considered an impressive technical feat. There were few games of it's scope back then and the graphical fidelity was amongst the top of its class, especially considering the N64 library - and not using pre-rendered graphics as much and as overtly as the jRPGs of the era. It's use of pre-rendered graphics was, in fact, subtle and melded well with the real-time polygonal graphics. The camera is generally acceptable, but it's finnicky sometimes - a problem that was much more felt in Majora's Mask -, an issue of the times. The ability to move the camera in the way OoT did, however, was extremely innovative.

All in all, OoT is one of those rare games that can be considered a true masterpiece. It is the template for all current open-world action-adventure games and is the starting point to videogames being taken seriously as a medium. It holds up well as an entertainment piece and is legendary as turning point in videogame history.

Over the years, Yoshi has been accused of many things, including being a fraud that does tax evasion and runs from the law.

Of course, it's hard to imagine that: there is no way one of Nintendo's most adorable and silly mascots can be this stinky.... until you remember that he once sold you a literal tech demo at full price, didn't elaborated and left the room while taking your clothes... and now you can kinda see Yoshi committing tax fraud!

I rememeber trying this game with the DS of a friend, and being charmed by the really adorable environments, cute graphics and cute use of the touch screen to creat clouds.... admittely I was a dumb kid, but this didn't stop me to ask my friend to rent the game for a bit and going past the cute but really simple first level, wondering what else the game had to offer...... OH, that was it! Huh.... well that sucked a lot.

I guess the touch screen was innovative for the time or something, but this is such a nothing experience that I am even surprised that it was able to get released on the market. I guess it can be considered a "silly arcade experience", where you try to aim for an higher score in the different (not that different) modes the game has to offer, but honestly... there are mobile games with more content than this. It would have been totally fine as a side mode for a Mario Party or a Yoshi Island entry, but on its own..... yeah no, sorry.

If you are searching for 5 sorta charming minutes where you use clouds to move around Baby Mario and make Yoshi go up and down (since he moves on its own).... honestly don't bother. Sorry.

I recently purchased a "pack" of Oreo X PAC-MAN Limited Edition biscuits, and felt a tinge of impostor syndrome. Am I really a big enough Pac-Fan to eat these? I mean, sure, I can accurately identify Inky, Pinky, Blinky and Clyde no problem, and I know all the words to Buckner & Garcia's "Pac-Man Fever" off by heart - a song that rips the songwriting traditions of the blues out of the Mississippi Delta and righteously appropriates them to discuss the real hardships (being a gamer) - but I don't really rate Pac-Man as one of my favourite Namco games. It's almost a little too elemental. Too primal. It's a chase game, and that clearly had influence on personal favourites like Dig Dug and Metal Gear, but it doesn't have any of that Dig Dug or Metal Gear stuff that I like in it, either.

I can't decide whether releasing Pac-Man as a standalone Neo Geo Pocket Color game in 1999 was an act of extraordinary hubris, or an earned confidence. I mean, Super Mario Bros. Deluxe on the Game Boy Color was one thing, but this is fucking Pac-Man. No new modes or anything. Pac-Man. One step up from fucking Pong. Maybe if you're younger, all these 20th century years seem to blend together in a big "I don't care" grey area, but we were playing Quake III online by then (or at least, we'd heard someone's big brother did it once, but he had to get off the internet after one match because it was costing a fortune on the phone bill). Seeing this on the shelf below the Game Boys and Pokémon instantly lost all credibility SNK may have hoped to have gained with the under-20s crowd. In the 90's, "retro" was incredibly niche. Like, I was aware of the Street Fighter and Bubble Bobble collections on PS1, but when I imagined someone buying them, they were like studious historians, analysing the software like it had just been dug out of a pharaoh's tomb. These things weren't conceivable as "entertainment" for "people". Who the fuck bought this at launch?

Now, I am that decrepit auld bastard. NGPC Pac-Man is cool. A little obnoxiously so, actually. It kind of predicted the retro boom that would start to take hold in the following decade. Pac-Man is a gaming icon. Literally. He's probably the little button you press on your phone screen to get the emulators on. It's difficult to view him objectively as The Packing Man, unencumbered by the decades of cultural impact that followed, but having a little one-and-done cartridge like this helps.

NGPC Pac-Man's big feature is a little rubber ring that comes in the box. You attach it to the NGPC's microswitch stick and it blocks off the diagonal directions. It's actually really effective, and makes the game feel much snappier, as you're locked to 90 degree turns. SNK are an arcade developer, first and foremost, and their approach in designing a two-button handheld is actually really cute. I think if you're happy to go along with that, and not moan about how naive it is to use this strategy to compete with the Game Boy Color, it's super cool that they put Pac-Man on here. And they set aside some of the budget to manufacture a little piece of rubber to make it as satisfying as it ought to be.

Pac-Man is fun. It's immediately speedy. You don't even press a button, and you shoot right out of the gate. All you can do is steer, avoiding the ghosts, attempting to squeeze into a corner of the map that still has power pellets on it, and seeing if you can keep dodging the baddies long enough to clear the board. Each ghost has their own characteristic, and theoretically, you should be able to use this to determine which direction they'll take at a crossing, but I've still to take the lesson of which one's "Speedy" and which one's "Pokey" to heart. Even ignorant of the specific attributes, it adds something to the game, to know that they're each subtly distinct, and it's a fun dynamic to have in the background, as you do your best to survive.

If you've played enough 80s arcade games, you'll know that Pac-Man can be done very wrong. Have you ever played Wizard of Wor? Fuck me, man. What a nightmare. Pac-Man was pioneering. Most games of the time were either about fighting, sport, or attempting to rip-off Star Wars as liberally as Lucasfilm's legal representation would allow. Pac-Man wasn't trying to be something else. It was proud to be a videogame, and it did something that could only really take the form of a videogame. It was praised for its original, non-violent concept (eating ghosts is not in violation of the Geneva Convention, apparently). It didn't assume anything of its audience. It opened up videogames to entirely new players. Anybody could play this. All the Nintendo oldguard see Pac-Man as the gold standard, and Miyamoto's even pulled the strings, buddying up with Namco bigwigs, to get his own four-player fangame bundled in with copies of R: Racing Evolution. Without a strong affinity for videogames, Keita Takahashi signed up with Namco because they made stuff like Pac-Man, and what other business was committing themselves to fun, novel ideas like that? We all benefit from Pac-Man's glow, and we ought to respect him.

Will you play it for more than five minutes? Probably not. But that's okay, too. We need little games like this.

Oh yeah, Yakuza 4 time!

After finishing Yakuza 3, the game considered 'the bad one' and having a decent time with it, I was excited for the rest of the series going forward. This one also looked interesting, because Kiryu was sharing the spotlight with 3 other guys this time round. Stories that take place from multiple perspectives are my jam personally, so I was looking forward to this.

Part 1: Akiyama rules

So the game starts with Akiyama, and holy shit this starts great. He's charming, he's suave, he's smart. His kicking based fighting style and jazzy soundtrack reminded me heavily of Sanji from One Piece, so it was great to play a game like that without it going 'uhm acktually there are women here you can't play this guy' every five minutes. His thing is lending money to people who interest him, so most of the side content revolves around that, with nearly all of them being great, stuff like the apprentice and the money bath quest especially. Not to mention his plot of tracking down a lady while investigating a murder and getting tangled in the larger plot. It starts and end great while leaving off on a great tale for the next guy. Not a thing I'd change about the plot here. 10/10. Hopefully the next guy is even half as strong

Part 2: Saejima drools

So then the player moves onto Saejima, Majima's old partner. Okay, this seems cool. Starts off in prison with Hamazaki from the previous game, while intrigue of private prisons and corrupt cops runs abound. Narrative seems cool seeing as this guy killed 18 dudes (right?), let's see how the first combat encounter goes oh my god it sucks it sucks so hard who designed this.

Saejima's gameplay revolves around charging attacks. Not my favorite if we're being honest, seeing as Yakuza games are at their best when it's one guy against an army like a classic martial arts movie. So having Saejima just be like 'okay gimme a sec' for most of his stronger moves didn't feel right to me, especially with the prison escape sequence he does feeling awkward with a terrible boss fight. I mean three terrible boss fights. I mean the same terrible boss fight done three times. But then you get to Okinawa, experience possibly the worst scene in the game, do a decent boss fight, and leave for Kamarocho, and get to do funny side activities from the perspective of a guy who hasn't seen in city in 25 years, kinda like Kiryu in the first game and oh no wait the city is on lockdown, you have to fuck around in the sewers, and then do one boss fight in a cage match(this scene is actually good tho) and then almost directly move on to another boss fight (also pretty good) afterwards, and that's basically Saejima. Some neat writing, why does the gameplay suck so much. 3/10. Hopefully the next guy is decent.

Part 3: Tanimura is decent

Next up is Tanimura, a rookie cop who notices something's up within the force, and is on his way to figure it out. I like his story, it's mostly around the man who killed his father, while also delving into the plight of immigrants in Japanese society. I liked the twists here, and his side content is also great. It mostly seems to focus on larger chains such as him figuring out the truth about his father, as well as the training missions tying into a mystery about tracking down a killer, it's all great stuff. His combat is also pretty good, being more focused on parries and restraints, fitting for a police officer. Thing is, his chapter 4 boss dies, but he finds a traitor in the force, which'll be his great conclusion and entertaining boss fight. (foreshadowing is a narrative device yadda yadda yadda) 8/10

Part 4: Kiryu is also here

Kiryu is once again dragged into the scheme practically wearing a shirt saying 'SERIES CONTINUITY' on it. He shows a lot of personal growth here, choosing to opt for peace and forgiveness when a villain from the previous games calls for his aid, and he's back in Kamarocho before you know it. His plot is pretty much the connecting tissue that unites the Yakuza 4 (get it?) before the finale. It's where the emotional gut punches start, and all of it is classic Yakuza goodness. But it's also where the flaws in the plot start. The less said about rubber bullets the better, and the plot has a lot of 'this guy betrayed that guy BUT THEN he got betrayed by the other guy working for that guy' to the point you'll probably need a flowchart or something to keep up with who's betraying who. But anyway, the pieces are all moving, the villains are making their play, and it's time for the explosive finale.

Part 5: Who designed this finale

With all four together, it's time to hit up the tower and conclude things. This game ditches the gauntlet of goons you face on your way to the boss, but that's fine, as long as the finale is good.

Akiyama fights the guy from Tanimura's plot. Okay, bit odd, but Akiyama didn't really leave anyone to fight in his own plot, so it's whatever. Fight's fun and satisfying, thumbs up.

Saejima's fight is also pretty good (read: easy to cheese) against a person he has emotional connection to who you honestly feel kind of bad for. It's a decent fight.

Kiryu and Tanimura is awful

Kiryu's is your standard shirtless tower brawl, only made to be as annoying and unfun as possible. He has constant armour so you can barely do anything to him, blocks and dodges constantly, and has a move that I swear just makes shit phase through him which he also uses constantly. You can't even land a light combo on him before he goes 'nuh-uh' and pummels you into the dirt.

But Tanimura's fight, HOLY FUCK. Straight up, everyone involved with making this fight should be blacklisted from the industry. It's one thing to gave the main boss be a guy with a gun who takes cheap shots at you from a distance. It's another to give him bodyguards. It's another to give him a bodyguard count in the double digits who proceed to combo you constantly. But finally, they block and dodge constantly so you can't get a decent hit in, and even when you do that's when the gun comes back. Not the worst boss fight in Yakuza (Neo knockoff from 1 still takes that one) but still, dear god. Finale gets a 4/10, the story concludes nicely.

Overall, Yakuza is a game that's pretty consistently great, but the low points are among the lowest of any game I've played. averaging out my scores lands the game at a 6.6, but that feels too low, so it's like an 8. The vibes are good, it's (mostly) more Yakuza goodness, and I'm looking forward to 5