TheMonsterMensch
Maple Story ass game
Honestly the core gameplay loop is fine, I don't mind the repetition. What I do mind is the dialogue, most of it is bad. This game has both a Wilhelm scream and a "Leroy Jenkins". A lot of the interactions toward the end would be better if just implied, it really takes the momentum out of things when you have another character say "Humans... It's like they're the real monsters... They're... Inhuman." again.
However, I really like how the item bonuses never seem to quite line up correctly, so you're forced to weigh what you want to keep and what you want to ditch. Also the Forest of Harmony theme is great.
Honestly the core gameplay loop is fine, I don't mind the repetition. What I do mind is the dialogue, most of it is bad. This game has both a Wilhelm scream and a "Leroy Jenkins". A lot of the interactions toward the end would be better if just implied, it really takes the momentum out of things when you have another character say "Humans... It's like they're the real monsters... They're... Inhuman." again.
However, I really like how the item bonuses never seem to quite line up correctly, so you're forced to weigh what you want to keep and what you want to ditch. Also the Forest of Harmony theme is great.
2022
PowerWash Simulator delivers. I see a lot of people referring to this game as a waste of time or a guilty pleasure, but you're allowed to spend your time how you want to. I don't want to spend every moment of my life maximizing productivity or maximizing enjoyment, sometimes I just want to clean.
Didn't expect to enjoy the "Sonic Murder Mystery" as much as I did. I saw another review that mentioned this game felt a lot like an ad, but I'd like to counter with: "Yeah, a really good ad"!
The first sin of Dark Souls 2 is that it's kinda ugly.
Full disclosure: the developer plays in my D&D games.
Breath of fresh air! Batbarian focuses on atmosphere; it captures the feeling of being trapped within a dungeon. Enemies are strong, rests are few and far between, and the darkness is nearly all-encompassing. All this allows the game's relationships to shine--and there's no bond deeper than the one between a barbarian and their bat. It also allows the quirky sense of humor to land, which is probably the game's most stunning accomplishment.
I'd recommend playing with the assists, especially for some of the boss combat. Also, please place diligent markers on your map. Don't be like me and leave it mostly blank until you need to go through every room in a mad scramble for those last few gems.
Breath of fresh air! Batbarian focuses on atmosphere; it captures the feeling of being trapped within a dungeon. Enemies are strong, rests are few and far between, and the darkness is nearly all-encompassing. All this allows the game's relationships to shine--and there's no bond deeper than the one between a barbarian and their bat. It also allows the quirky sense of humor to land, which is probably the game's most stunning accomplishment.
I'd recommend playing with the assists, especially for some of the boss combat. Also, please place diligent markers on your map. Don't be like me and leave it mostly blank until you need to go through every room in a mad scramble for those last few gems.
2016
“What the florist and Date said about financial power or a loving family is pretty elitist. It’s a ‘common sense’ invented by society. A myth of masculinity. Truth is, a carefree guy without money or family doesn’t limit himself to societal standards. That’s a true BAD-boy.” - Kiryu
Yakuza Kiwami is a surprisingly deep conversation about masculinity. In the above quote Kiryu is acknowledging that masculinity is always contextual, which is a shocking amount of discourse from a game about dudes beating each other up. Kiryu is unashamed of who he is, he loves toy cars and karaoke. He's friendly with the cabaret women and treats them fully as equals. He talks openly about gender roles and social expectations. The game refuses to treat him as a knucklehead and it makes the stories so rich. While there are missteps and inconsistencies (Majima in particular) the game speaks to something deeper. I can't wait to play the rest of the series.
Yakuza Kiwami is a surprisingly deep conversation about masculinity. In the above quote Kiryu is acknowledging that masculinity is always contextual, which is a shocking amount of discourse from a game about dudes beating each other up. Kiryu is unashamed of who he is, he loves toy cars and karaoke. He's friendly with the cabaret women and treats them fully as equals. He talks openly about gender roles and social expectations. The game refuses to treat him as a knucklehead and it makes the stories so rich. While there are missteps and inconsistencies (Majima in particular) the game speaks to something deeper. I can't wait to play the rest of the series.
This game has some of the best cuts I’ve ever seen. Cutting is a difficult thing to pull off in games, it’s inherently disorienting in a medium that is all about immersion and agency, but for horror those feelings are a boon. I’ve seen the phrase “Lynchian” thrown out for a lot of horror games, but this game comes the closest in my opinion because it best matches his film form. The slow burn of the elevator, the disjointed but well written dialogue, the absurd not-a-metaphor videotapes, all the hallmarks of a well done Lynchian story are there. I’m by no means an expert, but one of the lead writers on Twin Peaks was a mentor of mine and he always said “throw it in there, it doesn’t matter where. They’ll find the meaning”.
2006
This game expects an inhuman level of precision in order to reach the fun shortcuts. There's absolutely no way a child is capable of that... Or maybe only children are. One of the two.
Any game gets an immediate +2 on its score out of ten for allowing you to play a skeleton.
2021
This game feels like a ride at Knott's Scary Farm, a classic arcade experience brought to the modern day through the magic of lootboxes and microtransactions. It's horribly balanced, expensive, and a blast when you're mildly buzzed and playing with friends. My girlfriend compares it to the fake game in Wreck It Ralph, where Jane Lynch proclaims "Our mission, destroy all Cybugs" and cocks her gun dramatically. The characters also have that "quirky"(tm) feeling that makes Back 4 Blood feel like a fake game being played in the background of a bad movie.
Every piece of story has been sanitized so that players can talk over whatever is happening. The game knows you're more concerned with fantasy football than killing zombies, so it delivers what you want: nothing.
I cannot recommend this game for the life of me but I will absolutely play it with you. We can laugh about how much it sucks.
Every piece of story has been sanitized so that players can talk over whatever is happening. The game knows you're more concerned with fantasy football than killing zombies, so it delivers what you want: nothing.
I cannot recommend this game for the life of me but I will absolutely play it with you. We can laugh about how much it sucks.
2013
This review contains spoilers
The game is better than the sum of its parts. It also proves that we shouldn't focus on improving graphics, but improving style. The lighting, animation, and that smooth, smooth soundtrack all come together to create some magic.
I also argue that this game's twist ending is better than the ending of The Usual Suspects. I love how little it matters, that it doesn't change anything, that it's haunting and only leaves us wondering if we'd been played.
It's a real testament to how well everything works because Telltale mechanics are just fundamentally uninteresting. I'm sure with repeat playthroughs I'll see how little the choices matter but, for that first playthrough, The Wolf Among Us pulls off its glamour.
I also argue that this game's twist ending is better than the ending of The Usual Suspects. I love how little it matters, that it doesn't change anything, that it's haunting and only leaves us wondering if we'd been played.
It's a real testament to how well everything works because Telltale mechanics are just fundamentally uninteresting. I'm sure with repeat playthroughs I'll see how little the choices matter but, for that first playthrough, The Wolf Among Us pulls off its glamour.
2011
As Brad Pitt said in Moneyball: "How can you not be romantic about [Smash Bros]"?
It's incredible that this game even exists, what's even more incredible is that this game is the best fighting game of all time. Everything is immaculately balanced, and the roster is so much more full than even smash games with more characters because this roster has depth. The blood sweat and tears that all players have put into this game shines in Project M, even without a story mode it tells a beautiful story about a community always striving for more.
It's incredible that this game even exists, what's even more incredible is that this game is the best fighting game of all time. Everything is immaculately balanced, and the roster is so much more full than even smash games with more characters because this roster has depth. The blood sweat and tears that all players have put into this game shines in Project M, even without a story mode it tells a beautiful story about a community always striving for more.
Watched my girlfriend play this. I played a lot of Kirby games as a kid and I got a huge kick out of this. It's a great re-imagining and evolution. Mouthfull mode is hilarious and really engaging and carmouth Kirby deserves its memetic status. The post game content in particular is excellent and a 100% completion run has a great pace.
It's a great choice for kids, the regular game content should leave them feeling satisfied. In co-op the second player is a less powerful waddledee, so a young kid can either feel like they're helping or a slightly older kid can have a little help from their guardian while still feeling like the star. I imagine the post game content will feel too difficult for them, but I doubt they'll feel like they're missing out.
It's a great choice for kids, the regular game content should leave them feeling satisfied. In co-op the second player is a less powerful waddledee, so a young kid can either feel like they're helping or a slightly older kid can have a little help from their guardian while still feeling like the star. I imagine the post game content will feel too difficult for them, but I doubt they'll feel like they're missing out.
This review contains spoilers
This game might be best known for its creator, Alec Robbins, who was a writer on the smash hit sketch comedy "I Think You Should Leave". He also wrote "Mr. Boop", a comic in which he is married to Disney intellectual property Betty Boop (which I can't even begin to explain)
Like his other works this game is both a quirky subversion but also the absolute best version of itself. You play the world's most popular high schooler and must break up with -everyone- by the end of the day. It's an absurd premise but the game takes even that to extremes. You break up with people in single combat, tennis matches, and horrifying make-out sessions. You must even break up with a boy grieving the death of his father, which should not be as funny as it is. It's amazing that, despite that busy itinerary, the game still has time to talk about video games in a surprisingly powerful penultimate act.
When the game says you need to break up with --everyone--, it means it. Halfway through the game you must sever your relationship with your principal, "break-up" by convincing her to take a vacation. The game does an excellent job of continuing the absurd premise without making this romantic and therefore creepy. Both parties gaze wistfully for what might have been, but strictly in the principal-student sense of course. This is fun and quirky, but it is also the setup to the best payoff in the game where you must "break up" with the school janitor.
The janitor is the best written character, and his challenge is a challenge of confronting your own morality. "Breaking up" with this man means he loses his income, that he can't put his kids through school. Will you go through with it, just because the game tells you to? Just because you can? This is an excellent confrontation, not only for the sharp dialogue but also the difficulty of the task. You must be fully committed if you want that janitor gone.
The game plays the same trick that Undertale is so well regarded for, only in an inverse fashion. It's a challenge to the player themselves, to ask why they're playing the game and whether they want to complete tasks just because they're on a checklist, just because it's content to consume. If you invest yourself in the fiction of this universe why would you make the lives of its inhabitants worse? Just because it's written that you can? Undertale calls this urge a "perverted sentimentality", an incredible phrase.
That conversation with the janitor might prompt the player to go back and not break up with everyone. There, they would find that it's actually just as difficult to stay together with everyone as it is to break up. Some of those dialogue options that felt like jokes were actually traps, and your lovers can grow suspicious of you and break up if you're not careful. It is legitimately incredible that Robbins packed two games in one here. For that, this game stayed with me a lot longer than most. It's absolutely worth the $5 price tag.
Like his other works this game is both a quirky subversion but also the absolute best version of itself. You play the world's most popular high schooler and must break up with -everyone- by the end of the day. It's an absurd premise but the game takes even that to extremes. You break up with people in single combat, tennis matches, and horrifying make-out sessions. You must even break up with a boy grieving the death of his father, which should not be as funny as it is. It's amazing that, despite that busy itinerary, the game still has time to talk about video games in a surprisingly powerful penultimate act.
When the game says you need to break up with --everyone--, it means it. Halfway through the game you must sever your relationship with your principal, "break-up" by convincing her to take a vacation. The game does an excellent job of continuing the absurd premise without making this romantic and therefore creepy. Both parties gaze wistfully for what might have been, but strictly in the principal-student sense of course. This is fun and quirky, but it is also the setup to the best payoff in the game where you must "break up" with the school janitor.
The janitor is the best written character, and his challenge is a challenge of confronting your own morality. "Breaking up" with this man means he loses his income, that he can't put his kids through school. Will you go through with it, just because the game tells you to? Just because you can? This is an excellent confrontation, not only for the sharp dialogue but also the difficulty of the task. You must be fully committed if you want that janitor gone.
The game plays the same trick that Undertale is so well regarded for, only in an inverse fashion. It's a challenge to the player themselves, to ask why they're playing the game and whether they want to complete tasks just because they're on a checklist, just because it's content to consume. If you invest yourself in the fiction of this universe why would you make the lives of its inhabitants worse? Just because it's written that you can? Undertale calls this urge a "perverted sentimentality", an incredible phrase.
That conversation with the janitor might prompt the player to go back and not break up with everyone. There, they would find that it's actually just as difficult to stay together with everyone as it is to break up. Some of those dialogue options that felt like jokes were actually traps, and your lovers can grow suspicious of you and break up if you're not careful. It is legitimately incredible that Robbins packed two games in one here. For that, this game stayed with me a lot longer than most. It's absolutely worth the $5 price tag.
This game is magic, just pure magic. The comedy is outstanding for a video game from 2004 and instantly draws you into the world. Arriving in Rogueport, the first thing you see is in the background. It's a mugging, and you can't do anything about it because you're trapped in a conversation. It's such an excellent tone-setter that's so unique to video games. You can pause the conversation and watch what's happening, but you can't go over there or do anything about it. Mario doesn't notice it, only you do. After that you might step left and a toad tells you not to move or you'll step on her contact lens. Of course the moment you try to scoot away you step on it, which makes a satisfying crunch sound. The real trick of this is the timing, which is player dependent and thus always correct. You can see a game like The Last of Us play this for drama. The player decides the appropriate moment to stop gazing at the magnificent giraffes so that magical moment is always the exact right pace, at least for them. For Paper Mario it's just set up to the funniest gate in all of video games.
This is such an excellent introduction to a game that remains funny its whole run. Luigi's side story stands out in particular. It was almost worth completing the main quest just to hear whatever shenanigans Luigi got into. It just goes to show that the writers were writing circles around other games of the time.
Another bit of perfection is the Rat who strikes oil. His story of searching for your dream was just a juicy bit of side content that ties into the game so well. And the game is just filled to the brim with this level of story. Vivian and her sisters, Tech and Peach, and Bobbery are all given lots of love.
For all its wonderful story it's a shame that it just isn't consistent. Lesser side characters simply don't measure up to the writing of the better ones. Flurrie is the worst example, there's just not much to her or the punnies her story is centered around. She can never hope to measure up to Goombella, who is given tons more dialogue and whose story ties into the main plot.
Mechanically, the game has panache. All fights take place on a stage and have a theatrical flair that is just delightful. I'm sure someone smarter than me has written essays on the theatricality of video game combat and how Paper Mario brings that to the forefront. Conceptually it's excellent, but the game also pulls it off and makes this unique gimmick of turn based combat fun. There's timings to master, enemy attacks to learn, companion synergy, and then the game insists that you do it all with style to get those sweet sweet star points. The stage also has surprises for you, whether it's appealing to the crowd in the wrestling world or Hooktail diving into the audience and eating the toads to regain health it always keeps you on your toes. The combat is so intricate that as a kid I never got to the end credits scene, I could never beat the final boss because my timing and my strategy just weren't up to snuff. Returning as an adult, they were, and I finally got a finale 15 years in the making, and it was just as magical now as I was hoping then.
This is such an excellent introduction to a game that remains funny its whole run. Luigi's side story stands out in particular. It was almost worth completing the main quest just to hear whatever shenanigans Luigi got into. It just goes to show that the writers were writing circles around other games of the time.
Another bit of perfection is the Rat who strikes oil. His story of searching for your dream was just a juicy bit of side content that ties into the game so well. And the game is just filled to the brim with this level of story. Vivian and her sisters, Tech and Peach, and Bobbery are all given lots of love.
For all its wonderful story it's a shame that it just isn't consistent. Lesser side characters simply don't measure up to the writing of the better ones. Flurrie is the worst example, there's just not much to her or the punnies her story is centered around. She can never hope to measure up to Goombella, who is given tons more dialogue and whose story ties into the main plot.
Mechanically, the game has panache. All fights take place on a stage and have a theatrical flair that is just delightful. I'm sure someone smarter than me has written essays on the theatricality of video game combat and how Paper Mario brings that to the forefront. Conceptually it's excellent, but the game also pulls it off and makes this unique gimmick of turn based combat fun. There's timings to master, enemy attacks to learn, companion synergy, and then the game insists that you do it all with style to get those sweet sweet star points. The stage also has surprises for you, whether it's appealing to the crowd in the wrestling world or Hooktail diving into the audience and eating the toads to regain health it always keeps you on your toes. The combat is so intricate that as a kid I never got to the end credits scene, I could never beat the final boss because my timing and my strategy just weren't up to snuff. Returning as an adult, they were, and I finally got a finale 15 years in the making, and it was just as magical now as I was hoping then.