I have the same exact story about this as Sit on bottle, where I only got it out of morbid curiosity due to one of my friends getting viscerally upset over it. With that one I was immensely amused over how stupid it was with shit like the incredibly annoying luck based bottle rotating "gameplay" and the dumb Minecraft Steve looking motherfucker unzipping their pants every time they sit on a bottle in the weird abandoned asset flip factory of pointless production of bottles made solely to be sat upon.

Here, however, I just feel rather sad with how slow and uneventful everything is. The only real war you're at with in these skies is against all these gigantic bees, strangely airborne bombs, packs of TNT someone strapped to balloons for some goddamn reason, and spaceships flying horizontally due to their absolutely wasted pilots. Everything moves about as fast as molasses, the only three levels the game has are all completely identical to each other plus they each take like twenty minutes to trudge through, and somewhere 3/4ths into the third level the game just gives up and cuts to a splash screen of the title before abruptly ending with no fanfare whatsoever. There is nothing else remotely worth recognition here.

Speaking of my friend Velvetune, they're an avid Steam achievement hunter so they're quite the expert on awful, desolate experiences like these. You can thank them for their influence on me playing these random stinky Steam shovelware games they find somehow, and now I'm gonna link their review here since it's significantly more entertaining than anything this has to offer.
https://steamcommunity.com/id/Velvetune/recommended/1373120/

Also another one of my friends gave what is quite possibly the most perfect and amusing descriptor of this game; saying it looks like, and I quote: "It was made by an Austrian computer engineering college student in under ten days."

Weird little platformer. It has alot of thematic charm too it but alot of frustrating jank as well, mainly from certain parts being rather confusing and with how the combat works making tanking your way through certain enemies the simplest way through. (Like the first boss I actually game overed on and had to look up what to do because I couldn't figure out how to damage him) The game isn't that tough even with these aspects though, since it's fairly generous with things like heals, so it doesn't really get annoying.

The idea of a mobile phone Mario Kart seems like it would be something super cool, but the result here was just so underwhelming to me. I don't know, I just really couldn't get used to this game's awkward control scheme. Races just started to feel like more of a hassle due to them and missions became a real struggle to get perfect scores to earn extra stars because of them as well. Plus the very overly intrusive gacha and subscription stuff really hindered my desire to continue with this and I eventually just dropped it altogether not long after release. And with all the infamy this game has around it's extreme desire for your money that persists to this day makes me believe that it hasn't gotten any better since I left, so I highly doubt I'll be willing to try this again.

Sonic's first game is kind of odd to look back on after all these years and how the series evolved upon this. It's what alot of people think of now about game suffering from First Game Syndrome, with it's odd level design and pacing taking up roughly half the game though it's advertised as a game "all about speed." People often like to dog on Sonic with how he's supposed to be "all about speed" even though you frequently come across platforming and obstacles. However, I personally like to think of Sonic as a series more about being speed-oriented and having a great sense of agility to his overall platforming rather than something that's just always about going fast at all times and nothing more than just going fast. This mindset does apply well here as Sonic 1, while clearly less developed upon like his other titles, is still an overall snappy platformer and a good start for the series. This, however, doesn't quite excuse the notoriously odd aspects of this game that later entries would improve upon, like certain stage designs, the lack of a spin dash, a weaker half of the game, and those really dumb special stages. I swear, it feels like you're at the mercy of the game most of the time in them. And that's really bad for something that you only have 10 opportunities to finish off in the whole game, as you can easily get your opportunities screwed over in the main stages or in the special stages themselves. All you even really get out of getting all the Chaos Emeralds is just a slightly different ending, no Super Sonic or anything, so that's lame. (getting the good ending is basically completing the game here so uuuuuuaaaaaaaaahhhh)

So all in all, Sonic 1 is alright. It's a decent platformer but rather lackluster compared to later Sonic games. But I admire it's influence for getting the blue blur his name known in the gaming industry.

I've had alot of strange childhood memories about this one, even though I've never played it nor owned a Genesis. From the playthroughs I saw back then, something always felt so mystical about this game, I dunno it was just my strange child mind resonating with it alot. It's not as mystical now to me as it was back then but finally getting to play it was a neat experience. It's a pretty harmless platformer, all things considered. It's pretty fun all around but it's also rather short too.

The library stage is still my favorite even after all these years, I really like the theming and the whole tea and milk sub-areas. (It's also probably where I got most of those mystical feelings as a kid)

This game somehow manages to be really frustrating yet so utterly lame at the same time. It's style and presentation is so completely unremarkable. It feels like it's trying to do a "throwback to the retro eras of gaming" thing and does it in the most generic way possible, and thus fails to do what made people enjoy those games in the first place. A good way to describe it is to think of how a TV show or something would make up a fake game for a character to play in a scene with the little knowledge the writers had on video games as a whole and then imagine that game actually being a real thing. The actual gameplay itself is where the frustrating aspects of the game come through. It's sluggish as hell, which doesn't combine well with the barebones and haphazardly designed stages that have no consideration of how the game plays, and as such makes the platforming really boring normally, and really annoying later on with levels that have multiple mechanics going on at once. Those mechanics can be particularly annoying, like the flickering platforms, the game's addiction with several kinds of instant death traps, and the goddamn ice physics which, if the jetpack didn't reset your momentum, would've made certain stages near unplayable, the list goes on. Said mechanics also suffer badly from all of the flaws of the general level design, in that they don't even feel like they had much thought put into them when used in the levels which makes most of the levels feel super similar to each other, and can even bring in situations where certain patterns just don't line up properly causing some very annoying moments to happen. These annoying moments come particularly when the game tries to amp up the challenge, like in the game's later levels, the ghost levels, and the secret levels. Certain moments like phasing right through flickering and moving platforms if you don't land directly on top of them, tight horizonal holes you have to time your jetpack just right or else you just get instantly killed even if you're a few pixels too low, or those dumb unaligned pattern moments I mentioned earlier. The ghost stages and the secret grannie stages are particular highlights of all of the game's bullshit at it's highest point. Practically all the annoyance from the mechanics shine here, especially the instant kills in the grannie stages. (There was one part in a grannie stage in the mountain world that had a literal enemy spam section and I really want to know who playtested that and thought it was okay)

So, whatever. This game's just completely uninteresting to finish and a frustrating nightmare to complete. It's just generally not worth your time unless you really want another completion like I did.

Simply put, the best classic Sonic game of the era. And probably my favorite title on the Genesis so far. Also in terms of classic Sonic titles in general, it's probably only outclassed by Mania. The games are better judged when put together into the complete package, so that's how I'm going to judge them.

This series kept improving with each installment mostly, and this game is the proof of everything learnt during each game. Boy did they manage to go out with a bang with the finale of the main classic Sonic saga. Almost every zone here slaps, while the more questionable zones like Marble Garden and Flying Battery are just okay. (I didn't find many issues with Carnival Night and Sandopolis surprisingly enough) And the ending of this game isn't crazy strict like the final zone of Sonic 2, even including the bonus final boss for getting all of the Chaos Emeralds or Super Emeralds.

And speaking of the Emeralds, thankfully the special stages here are actually good here unlike Sonic 1 and 2! The main issue with them I find is that there is a bit of input lag, though I'm not sure if that's an issue with the re-release but oh well. Plus the new save feature is really great! It makes the game a whole lot more fair while pairing really well with the special stage system. Say if you don't get all of the emeralds in your first run, you can play the game again with your emerald progress so you can get everything left on another run instead of having to do it all in one run. This also pairs well with how the special stages are reached, with the entries being scattered throughout each level incentivizing taking different paths you didn't go through before. Though if you like doing everything in one run you're allowed to play without a save if that's your thing.

This is still to this day one of the best Sonic games, even though it's held back a bit by a couple of zones, it's still the best classic Sonic game of the time, and an amazing sendoff to the original classic Sonic saga.

The original Mario Bros. is honestly not very good. My main problem here is that the movement feels way too stiff and slippery at the same time. It's to the point that it's a struggle to get around the map and stun enemies to defeat them. (And those ice enemies can take advantage of your movement struggles to make platforms even harder to move on, which is real nice) The gameplay loop would be much more enjoyable if it wasn't so hard trying to maneuver yourself around. It also doesn't help that a much better version of this is included in all of the Super Mario Advance games as well as one of my favorite games of all time, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga. You're much better off playing that version on one of those games. (I couldn't imagine paying money for a sort of Virtual Console release of this when that version exists)

Hylics is the kind of game that just needs to be seen to be believed. It's so surreal to the point that not much here really makes sense, and it's honestly kinda rad. It's hyper-psychadelic claymation style is super unique and cool to look at, coupled with it's absurd plot, humor, and alot of dialogue being random strings of words combines into this extremely chaotic mess of what I can only refer to as the best kind of nonsense. Even if it has some shortcomings like some of the combat being rather annoying at times (please for the love of god learn the mystic meat ability as soon as possible or certain enemies WILL constantly blind you into oblivion), it's still one hell of a trip to experience.

This was a pretty neat experience I'd say. It's a sort of lighthearted environmental puzzle game about dropping things into holes. Plus it's story is fittingly goofy for it's gameplay loop and honestly pretty endearing. It's not a very long game at all, but it's probably better as something short and sweet. It's overall gameplay and feel is pretty simple so it's probably better being short so that it doesn't overstay it's welcome. I know some people out there aren't going to enjoy aspects like this game's humor but oh well, I have a soft spot for it I guess.

Please help, my irony poisoned playfulness towards bad games like these has gone much too far. I have elaborately gaslit my own mind into thinking this game is the funniest shit of all time. It's downright intrusive at this point. Whenever my mind is at a blank on something it just instantly and automatically defaults to Sonic Forces as an answer. This game has become my own personal Among Us. Oh dear god, it's all Sonic Forces. Everything is Sonic Forces.

(it's still pretty fucked up how you have have to experience grind for completion here though)