I had no sword at all for two and a half hours.

I eventually found Biggoron's Sword on sale for 15 Rupees in the Goron City shop as Adult Link. However, as an incredibly frustrated young Alex learned in 1999, you cannot defeat Ganon in Ocarina of Time with the Biggoron Sword. In order to finish the game, the final blow must come from the Master Sword.

During my first playthrough of this (or any) randomizer, the Master Sword was the very last item that I found. This is what it took for me to find it:

• Both the Master Sword and the Kokiri Sword were in the Fire Temple in optional chests, with the Master Sword's chest requiring the Scarecrow Song to reach it. But I couldn't get to either of those without access to the Megaton Hammer, as the room to the left where you encounter Darunia had no keys in it. (The key to the door on the right side of the entry hall turned out to be in the Boss Key chest)

• The Hammer was in the Gerudo Training Grounds, so I was ultimately gated by my lack of Hover Boots.

• The Hover Boots were in Jabu-Jabu's belly, in place of the Zora's Sapphire. But I couldn't complete that section without the Boomerang.

• The Boomerang was in the moat in place of the Ocarina of Time, but I needed the 3 Spiritual Stones before Zelda would chuck it in there.

• The Kokiri Emerald was in one of the Gibdo coffins in the Bottom of the Well, so I needed the Lens of Truth to discover that.

• And the Lens of Truth was sold by a Business Scrub in Dodongo's Cavern. I got a good deal though, it was only 10 rupees.

Obviously, I had no idea where the Master Sword would be, so this wasn't a plan or a list of instructions I followed, it's just how things shook out. And I had a great time! I used Ship of Harkinian's randomizer, and there are some fantastic options that made the constant back-and-forth scouring of Hyrule more feasible. The most useful ones were unbreakable Deku Sticks (absolutely critical since I didn't find a sword for a while), changing Link's age with the Song of Time, Bunny Hood increasing speed like in Majora's Mask, and ageless items (allowing Young Link to use the Hookshot, for example). I was incredibly impressed with Ship of Harkinian though, and will definitely put more playthroughs into that, randomized or not.

Halo 3 is like a thrilling action movie that is constantly in its climax. Once the campaign begins it doesn’t hold back. Lulls in the action are minimal, set pieces are plenty, and the action is constant. You would think this would get old after a while, but Halo 3 does not overstay its welcome. Clocking in at an average of 8 hours the time flies by. The story is admittedly pretty lackluster especially in comparison to Halo 2. Instead of setting up characters like the Arbiter, fleshing out the motivations of the Covenant, and establishing the lore of the Forerunners and Flood, Halo 3 opts to stick to its guns--literally. We just blast our way from one set piece to the next leaving any desire for lore or character development to take a backseat. Mechanically, it plays a lot like Halo 2 but improved. The new brute weapons, addition of the badass Spartan Laser, and the new equipment feature add to the already break-neck pace of firefights. The new vehicles were a blast to ride around in as well, especially my new personal favorite the brute Chopper. In the end, Halo 3 is a thrill-ride that leans into fast-paced action but sacrifices depth and greater narrative. It is a blast to play but lacks that extra push that could take it over the top and complete the package.

I grew up with Banjo-Kazooie. For some reason, I had a problem with Tooie because it seemed too different from its predecessor. I called BK my favorite game from 1999 to 2014. Then I finally decided to play Tooie, and I 100%-ed it.

It was incredible.

Everything BK can do, Tooie can do better. The only issue is the framerate, as Tooie (like other Rare games) pushed the 64 to its limits, and that leads to some performance issues. But if you play Banjo-Tooie on Xbox, it plays like a dream.

Play this game!!

Trivia Time!

The real reason we greenlit this game was that we just thought it was funny to have Treasure develop a game all about treasure

Stay tuned for more Trivia Time segments in the near future!

YES.

Somebody once thought, "What if we made a Wild West outlaw game, but you fly an airplane the whole time" and it turned out incredible. However, unsatisfied, they then proceeded to wonder, "What if it became a Chicago mafia game, but you fly an airplane the whole time", and it was just as good. But with more yet to give unto the world, they looked the original Xbox right in its single green eye and posed the ultimate question: "What if it ends up being an Indiana Jones game... but you fly an airplane the whole time??"

I truly do not believe that games need to look any better than Crimson Skies. This is peak sixth-generation aesthetic, and it looks phenomenal upresed on Series X. There's so much style and charm on display here, with a delightfully pulpy performance from Timothy Omundson (!!!GALAVANT REFERENCE!!!) in the lead role. But more than anything, this is the most engaging air combat I've ever experienced, with its dogfights' tension regularly making me clench up and lean into turns while sitting on my couch like the guy in the N64 Tilt Pak ad. The final segment of the penultimate level in particular is one of the most intense, nail-biting sequences in any game I've ever played. I loved all of it!

Now lastly, we have to acknowledge the loss of a reviewing giant. Recently @Elkmane announced his retirement. As a lifelong Elkster, I knew this day was coming, but thought we had more time. While it's not the name he used here, I knew him as Big John. It just so happens that Crimson Skies features an ally character of the same name, and in the final level, King Richard kept shouting his name. I became fond of this game's Big John, but I'll miss the real one far more. So long, pal.

Elksters for life.

The game begins by dropping your car at the top of an active volcano. I obviously tried to drive the car straight into the lava, but the game FADES TO BLACK BEFORE YOU REACH THE HOT MOLTEN GOODNESS. What is the point of all the realistic graphics if I can't even melt my car???

A little while later, while driving through a cloud of kicked up dust, the commentator shouted "WOOOO RIGHT INTO THE EYE OF THE STORM!!" Gamers, I furrowed my brow so hard at him. It was a dust cloud! There is no eye! The eye is the calm area in the middle of a tornado or something, a phenomenon in which the center of the destructive force is the safest place to be! That doesn't apply to the current situation at all!

I generally try not to be a Surly Nitpicky Gamer Boy™, but a lot of big budget AAA games really do bring it out of me. I get it, it's very pretty and the cars go fast. But I finally tried Ridge Racer Type 4 a few months ago, and the cars in that 26-year-old game not only felt better to drive, but it had an actual visual identity that was beyond cool. This is just boring!

Rebirth and Remake are opposites in many ways. Remake was a linear, narrative-focused game with cramped and narrow environments tunneling you toward specific objectives and story beats. Rebirth is an open, content-packed game with expansive areas that allow for endless hours of exploration. Many players are going to struggle to adjust to this new style of game especially if they expect a similar experience from Rebirth as they had with Remake. I too had to adjust to this new style. Remake created such a compelling gameplay loop that felt tight and rich in plot beats. Very rarely did you spend much time away from the main plot save for a few mediocre side activities or the occasional boss battle with one of Chadley’s many simulations. Rebirth on the other hand presents you with so many side activities that it can be a shock to the system. I did not fully adjust to the flow of Rebirth until I had already completely cleared the first major area. Once I did adjust, once it all became second-nature and I fully embraced what Rebirth had to offer, I found a game that, after 90 hours, all I wanted to do was play it all over again.

Rebirth tackles its open-world in a way that I was not sure about at first. It is very much a check-list style with massive open zones that have points of interest scattered around for you to go to and complete. It is most compared to a Ubisoft-style open-world and I believe that comparison is mostly apt here. In recent years I have shifted to preferring the open-world styles of a Breath of the Wild or an Elden Ring. Big open worlds with minimal markers. Games where you just get placed in a beautiful world and can go anywhere at any time and discover things without knowing what is coming up next. The adjustment from those kinds of open-worlds to this was certainly an obstacle, but it was one I broke through. By the time I began exploring and completing objectives in the second major open-area, it was all really beginning to click.

The actual actions you’re taking in the open-world can range from a simple 10 second button-press QTE to battles with special mini-boss fiends. This is to say that some are definitely more involved than others and not all objectives are made the same. However, they all serve the purpose of fleshing the world out and serving as an excuse to engage and explore these beautiful landscapes. Each open area also has a hub-town that you can explore, rest, gather items, equipment, and side quests to complete. The side quests are really where the game’s side content is at its best. These side quests can have varied purposes from deepening the lore of the world, giving more characterization to your companions, or even as a long joke. All are well-worth doing even for players who are not vibing with the open-world aspect of the game. They add so much flavor and depth that would otherwise be missed out on.

The activities just mentioned already would be enough to make Rebirth a much more expansive game than Remake. However, Rebirth decides it is not done yet as they introduce the player to literally dozens of mini-games to complete throughout your journey. Some are required for minor moments, others are tied to specific side quests, but most are completely optional. This will be the aspect that divides the playerbase the most. Players looking for that tight, streamlined, focused experience of Remake will likely not find much to love about the mini-games packed into Rebirth. Those who buy-into the world and enjoy engaging with a wide variety of content even if it deviates from the core gameplay will find a treasure trove of things to do. Admittedly, the mini-games can vary in quality. Some are fully fleshed out experiences all to themselves such as the in-universe card game Queen’s Blood. Most are fairly good to just OK. I only found a handful that I actively disliked which is impressive given the sheer size and quantity that are present.

A big problem some players will end up facing if they find themselves feeling negative about the mini-games will stem, at least in part, from the fact that the combat of Rebirth is so engaging. Remake was a game that already had on of my top 3 favorite combat systems of all time. Rebirth took that system and just expanded on it and easily surpassed the original. Every character is unique, serves a specific niche, has similar levels of complexity, and are a blast to learn and play. With this many characters to play as--6 in total for your main party--it can be easy for some to get lost in the shuffle as you tunnel into one party set up that you find comfortable. Rebirth solves this by having multiple story moments when the party composition shifts and changes as characters temporarily leave the party, go on a little mini-adventure, or whatever other narrative reason they have for shifting party composition. This can easily feel forced and frustrating but Rebirth makes it feel very natural. Never once did my party composition change and I was unsatisfied or outright annoyed by it.

The story is going to be one of the biggest draws to this game. Remake created a world, characters, and narrative that compelled old and new fans alike while throwing some major curve-balls at the end that confused and divided players. Rebirth maintains this trajectory for most of the game. The main story drip-feeds information slowly, creating two or three questions for every answer it might provide. In-between these moments of intrigue are emotional character moments, hilarious misadventures, and thrilling conflicts. The quality of the main story is every bit as compelling, excellently written, and engaging as Remake, if not moreso.

The adventure is certainly a lot wackier than Remake though. Remake had its moments of fun and games but generally maintained that dreary atmosphere of Midgar. Rebirth cranks the goof to another level. Despite how absurd some of the situations are that our characters find themselves in, it still maintains a level of writing quality that never veers too far into the cheesy quality you might associate with something like Kingdom Hearts (this is no shade to Kingdom Hearts either, it’s literally my favorite game series ever). This may turn off players who prefer a more serious, darker atmosphere. I found it incredibly endearing and made me fall deeper in love with this cast of misfit characters even more-so than I had before.
If Remake was controversial for its perplexing ending, then Rebirth will be even moreso. They do not shy away from the ideas they proposed in Remake, instead they double down. They attempt to create a thought-provoking ending that doesn’t give all of the answers. After all, there is an entire third game still to come. Most will be bewildered by it and that is to be expected. If endings that you have to sit with, digest, really dig into and theorize about are your style, then Rebirth will provide. If you prefer a story with a more definitive ending then Rebirth’s ending may not sit well with you. Either way, even during bouts of shock, confusion, and a million neurons firing in all directions in my brain as different revelations flashed before my eyes, the emotional resonance that the ending of this game attempts to give still came through, and it came through hard. Rebirth does not pull punches when it tries to deliver emotional moments and all of them hit like freight trains.

Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth is a lot. It’s a content-rich adventure that tries to simultaneously honor the original title from the late-90s, re-create the magic of its immediate predecessor, and become its own thing entirely. Which combination of things you do or don’t think work out will vary wildly based on your expectations, taste, and willingness to buy-in to all that Rebirth attempts to do.

I bought in, I embraced fully each aspect that Rebirth tried to accomplish. What I got in return was one of the best gaming experiences of my lifetime. What I got was a game that, despite its girth, will be a part of my library to return to forever. I received a magical experience that cascaded me with emotions that I had not felt since 2005 when I played Kingdom Hearts II for the first time. Little did I know it would become my all-time favorite game ever. Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth is not Kingdom Hearts II, but it is the first game I have played since that game to give me a similar type of feeling while playing. Awe, excitement, thrill, joy, sadness, despair, bewilderment, intrigue, exhilaration, all of these emotions and more combine to create two distinct experiences that will stick with me forever. Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth reignited a feeling in me that I did not think would resurface again. It easily has become one of my favorite games of all-time.

Stunning art - world, rich and clever;
Renaissance mice and voles and more.
Charm recalls classics I adore,
90s Sam & Max, however
the dialogue became a chore.
The worldbuilding became ignored,
memes cheapen what was once clever;
my expectations were severed.