Playing Killzone 2 after all those years when the dust of the PS360 war has long gonne settled I can see how difficult and uphill battle had Sony fanboys to push this as HALO rival. KZ2 has for it time some crazy production values and for a moment you can forget it is not the infamous target render from 2006. Visual design is strong for the most part but you can feel that ISA troops are more of an afterthought in comparison to Helghasts. KZ2 feels like it has more potential but rarely does anything interesting with it, hiding behind the wall of genre conventions instead.

I had a friend once. A man I met under inauspicious circumstances. It was a trying time in my life, and at first, to be honest, I didn't trust him. An ally of necessity, not of my choosing. But if I can credit anyone with getting me through those hard times, it was him. Other acquaintances came and went, I couldn't tell if my ex was trying to help me or just using me, my second most constant companion kept getting kidnapped. But whenever I needed him, my friend was there, with a jaunty greeting and a cool new shotgun to sell me.

I lost that friend a long time ago. But recently, I've been seeing something wearing his face.

This new... "Merchant" has none of my friend's warmth or charisma. He has an oily, sneaky quality that some people seem to think is apropos. Are we really at the point of pretending Resident Evil, of all series, is too good for camp? Whatever happened to showmanship? My friend set the tone for the entire game, such was his force of personality. The only lasting impression I get from this wet blanket is of deafening, aching lack.

Also, the guy never shuts the hell up up. Who was it that decided vendor NPCs don't get enough voice lines in video games? Who decided they should periodically nag you about how long you're taking while you browse their wares? (No, seriously, what's patient zero? It's a very similar vibe to how all the companions complain every time you change your party composition in Baldur's Gate 3. Unpopular opinion apparently, but I like it when games don't make characters constantly whine at you for engaging in basic, necessary gameplay functions that should barely even be diegetic.)

When I was a child, a kind girl named Navi literally just said "hey" or "listen" about once every fifteen minutes if you were wandering around somewhere other than the critical path and she was absolutely reviled, pilloried and stoned for at least a real world ass decade. Just for being very occasionally heard. Just for trying to help. But this pod person, this soulless imposter, this fucking Cockney FRAUD stands here and belittles me every fifteen seconds for sitting in a pause menu pondering how I should spend my money in a game where scarcity of resources is a core mechanic, and gamers are silent??? The real Merchant was more than just a funny meme man, sir. He was a CONSUMMATE. CUSTOMER SERVICE. PROFESSIONAL. You really wanna bring this kind of naked rudeness with your only fucking customer? You think you've established that kind of rapport with me? You bring shame on his house.

And to all the sycophants and enablers, who settled for less and let this character assassination pass? History will remember your cowardice.

Anyway apart from that it's a great game! I was really worried about how it would sort of interact with the original in the cultural memory but I think we got basically the best case scenario, where it's a different enough beast that both versions have lasting creative value. It's not as replayable, I think--I always play a new Resident Evil early in the year when it comes out and then replay that October, but I got bored and went back to Armored Core during my RE4make replay--but the action just feels so good and Ashley is much more of a character.

I really enjoyed the first few hours I played as I was progressing at a steady pace and was charmed by this quaint little game. However, once you get stuck, the experience becomes miserable. This is because there is no map to fall back on, to help you figure out what you are missing or where you need to go at this stage in the game, as in all other metroidvania style games. The omission of a map may have been acceptable if the level design wasn't so labyrinthine and the visuals often homogenous. As a result of this I convinced myself I was missing a vital upgrade, so I tirelessly explored for over an hour, which really made me sour on the experience as I refused to give in to looking anything up, which is a customary practice for me. Eventually I gave in, thankfully, and realised I was misunderstanding the message located before the Tower Remains, which allowed me to progress. The game being in 3D further exacerbates the problem of uncertainty regarding what is gated by which ability.

Once I overcame this hiccup, I did begin to enjoy the game again, and I was able to appreciate the full range of Cybil's move-set, the movement is exceptional and makes traversing these mostly bland levels satisfying. The Sun Greeves are its only iffy aspect, however you become less and less reliant on them as the game goes on. The combat in this game is very poor but the game knows this and does not force it upon you often, instead most enemies function as a refill for your health, to prevent you from dying to acid damage received while platforming. The game also possesses a very pleasing atmosphere, which is dreamlike and almost surreal, this is thanks to its tranquil music and hazy visuals.

I know I’ve been mostly very negative here however I largely enjoyed my time with Psuedoregalia. I would like to commend the dev who designed this game, its successful parts are outstanding and have me extremely excited for what they produce next. I do however hope that they revisit the creative ideas offered up here, with more development time and resources.

If you are still friends with me after playing all six boards of Mario Party 2 with me, then not only is your patience incredible, this is a friendship that absolutely will last.

Mario Party 2 lacks the wild swings of titles like Mario Party 3 or Mario Party 6, where a bounty of items raining down from a random space or a Reverse Shroom in the right place can shift the trajectory of a game in one turn. It's the best slow-burn Mario Party, where you'll need to decide your game plan for the next five turns and perform well in mini-games in order to actually achieve it. Options are limited, but that creates a rather consistent game state within the first five turns compared to other titles, letting you properly set up. After this point, it becomes a weapon of debilitating psychological warfare, as you try to convince everyone else of who's going for Happening Star, who's leading in mini-games, what the best decision to steal at a Boo would be. Board design is probably the best equipped for its item layout of the series, with the very limited options all being well considered and making item play not an instant swing, but a stepping stone to get there. Plus Bower Land, Horror Land, and Western Land probably have the best, most competitive Boo placement in the entire series.

Mario Party is as fun as you want it to be. If it's just a time waster to you, then yeah, it's fairly mid. But if you are willing to make deals, throw games, stab people in the back knowing that they will never trust you again but you NEED this win right now, desperately try to dig yourself out of a 1v3 where everyone wants you to lose a mini-game and you skill your way to the top because you're just that good at Hot Bob-omb? There's few experiences like it. Mario Party 2 hits the perfect sweet spot for me between being charming and accessible in how quickly understandable its mini-games are and how oppressive you can be with board knowledge and proper play (plus it has 1v3's that aren't total gimmes sometimes, and that's hard for this series!). And it's got the funny costumes that everyone will assume is the entire reason you like the game, because they're blinded by the allure of the Reverse and Sluggish Shrooms! But you know the truth. The funny costumes are the way. Bowser giving you money from his secret bank account if you're poor is the way. Getting in horrible debt to the Baby Bowser Bankers to the point where they'll steal a star from you if you try to repay your loan with zero coins is the way.

Congratulations, DK. You are the true super star!!!

It's really great to see a Sonic fangame be finished these days, that doesn't happen often. But aside from that, I'm not really big on this one. Cool level themes, definitely a ton of energy and charm all around. But the level design is pretty uninteresting and often automated by springs and loop-de-loops and whatever new gimmick a stage holds. Bosses pose about as much of a threat as a fly, and the special stages.. meh.

I'm sorry, but this game wasn't really all that fun. I respect the effort put into it, but I'm still disappointed.