If they were humans this game would have been 10 times more horrifying.

"Undefeatable" is overrated. Boom. Send Tweet.

Okay, now I KNOW I would have not been a Sonic fan in the console war. There are way too many times in this game that I felt like I died to something that just wasn't my fault.

As funny man Peter Griffin once said, It insists upon itself.

Splatoon 2.5. I somewhat kid, but it's still a fun game, with a pretty good story mode that beats the story modes of the last two games. Octoling Expansion still edges this game's story out a bit, but it's still worth the bu-

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I'm more of a Crash Bandicoot guy.

If you played the original, this is still worth checking out. But it isn't going to light the world up again like the original.

"B-BUT YOU PLAY AS A CAT! THAT MAKES IT A 10/10!" A good game is a 7/10. A charming idea with good gameplay behind it is a 10/10. A charming idea with nothing supporting making it just playable is a 6/10.

Dang, that was actually a pretty fun shooter! Wonder if there are others I could check out...

Can't beat the classics, sorry...expect for the games above this game, but SHHHHHHHHHHHH

Well, at least I can say I finally played through the whole game instead of just using the warp whistles.

How the hell do you make a bad Mario game? Balan Wonderworld was a better 3D platformer. BALAN. WONDERWORLD.

Yeah, this game kind of annoyed me with just how much it loved to hide stuff without any obvious indication at times, how lost I can feel, and from just how annoying the controls can be, ESPECIALLY for wall-jumping. I get it; these are things that metroidvanias are good at and that's why they're popular, but for me, this game kind of killed off any remaining interest I may have had in the Metroid franchise.

The SP version which gave you all the powerups was nice though.

Tiny Build, don't rely on the Hello Neighbor franchise. You're so much better when you're doing your own thing.

No, this game really isn't jamming, actually. Kind of boring.

The superior Death Stranding.

Somedays I need to wake up and tell myself I’m not a turn based strategy guy.

I mean, I guess it's a passable Zelda-like game...but I'm not really a Zelda guy, so I really don't feel that much from it.

What remains of "What Remains Of Edith Finch".

It's a cute game in the village, and you play as a horrible goose. Your day won't be ruined if you play this.

A very deep cut about how news focuses on the negative aspects of humanity, and it does so shamelessly and effectively.

You say "HAHA funny kids' game why is it even recognizable online", then you get to Owl and he wrecks your entire day. Than Tigger...was honestly extremely easy for me, NGL. But then, the demon himself, Christopher Robin, awaits you. Do you dare have the strength to fight him and win?

It's not FlingSmash, Geist, or Burnout Crash!.
Not Mario Party 6 or Ultra Smash.
Neither Clubhouse Games or Wii Fit Plus.
Nor Family Feud on SNE-us.
All the games I played, whether good or bad,
Have tropes in common. My favorite doo-dads!
They may be rushed or plain or flawed, but ain't RPGs.
Oh, thank god.

Are my tastes just bad?
Am I the one to blame?
Or is it RPGs that are
Dumb. And lame.

Why don't you play them?

They just take so damn long to complete.

Why don't you play them?

Sixty hours just to rinse and repeat.

But you can grind for years just to beat that boss, oooh-ooh

Why waste all this time on just one game?

Why don't you play them?

Turn-based battles and too much text.
I'd rather be out not having sex.
Menu clutter and useless stats.
And random encounters can kiss my ass!
No gameplay till hours in.
Combat ready! How did I win?
The same thing happens over again.
And then their fun part comes up when?
I missed one thing and now I'm lost.
That one inch of text really meant a lot?
There's some shop with items I can't afford.
So grind for money. You won't be bored!
I'm tired. I'm scared. I'm not having fun.
There's no other way this can be spun!
What do I do? What do I check?
It's an RPG. What did I expect?

Why don't you play them?

They're so good, though.
You can't have opinions!

Listen, guys.

Why don't you play them?

They're not my style!

Start a new file.

Why don't you- Why don't- Why- why- Why don't you-