LukeFowler
1994
Perhaps the only game to touch me as deeply as any of my favorite works in other media. It was all downhill from here.
2015
Has some balance issues—namely, that one specific style is unequivocally the optimal way to play—but I’ve played hours upon hours of this game, learned every one of its mechanics by heart, and gotten good enough that I can reliably clear a fresh file on first try…yet I’m still happy to pick it up time and again, and I’m nowhere close to any kind of skill ceiling. It is just that fun, and just that well-designed. This is the kind of game that people would have happily paid obscene amounts for a few decades ago (and would continue to, in today’s hyperinflated collector’s market); at its current price point, it’s highway robbery. Fucking love Downwell.
2008
A solid 4.0 with the Touchless mod. Most of the games that made it to Megamix are better there, and most of the ones that didn't were left out for a reason. The others, though…those are rare delights. Crop Stomp is so damn good.
1996
Doesn’t know how to be a rhythm game, but it’s fine; nothing had ever been a rhythm game before. It makes up for it by packing in more personality than 80% of the modern industry combined. CHECK, AND TURN, THE SIGNALS TO THE LEFT…
2015
Would’ve ruled if this genius gameplay concept had us revealing a narrative that wasn’t catastrophically dumb, but it’s a fun ride while you’re on it.
2009
when I was 14 I composed a cover of Lose Yourself in the WarioWare D.I.Y. music maker that instantly kills anyone who hears it
This review contains spoilers
No better encapsulation of SWERY’s deal than the fact that, after completing this game about a trans woman, you unlock a “male” costume for her. Maybe he’ll learn one day.
2021
I regret to say it took until the final scene for the game to emotionally hook me, but the payoff was worth the journey. (Worth noting: I have an inhuman ability to stare without blinking for long periods, so the scenes predicated on the player having to “let go” of a moment did not have the intended effect.)
The remastered textures are noticeably worse than the ones from 2005. Too much dumb fun with friends for me to truly hate, though make no mistake, I should be rating it much lower.
2013
The first two phases of each game are immaculately balanced, nearly perfect in the way they complement one another; the third, while appealingly "ridiculous", is much shallower, cutting the mechanical considerations in half and punishing great early runs with a protracted endgame. It balances out to a nice experience for a few hours, but one that's hard to recommend for anyone who likes to hone their skills with games like this.
Highly subjective rating; this isn't a perfect VN by any means, it's got some wonky pacing and awkward prose and an aggressively off-putting pair of opening chapters, but my enemies Myers and Briggs both agree I am driven by my emotions, and I forged more of an emotional connection with this story than with nearly any other I've experienced in my adult life. Michel means everything to me.
It should tell you a lot about the opening hours of Resident Evil 7 that I'm giving this rating to a game that is, for a significant portion of its length, actively unfun to play.
2020
CG Sirrus and Achenar are abominations
2009
The most fascinating, baffling soundtrack any of these games ever had. My 12-year-old self yearned to play the Counting Crows track at a friend's house one day (none of them ever bought this one, alas)—how would he feel about his older counterpart finally owning this game and preferring instead to tackle "You Belong With Me" on repeat?
2016
A grand old time; the first FPS I've ever played where I actually enjoyed the combat. Not a big fan of the "key hunting" aspect, which feels retrograde more than it feels properly "retro" (I applaud people who can find the fun in wandering through empty environments to look for a corpse they missed), but I was very pleased to discover that the second half of the game has almost none of that! Two of the three boss fights are also a bit underwhelming, but the good one is reeeeeeeally good, so y'know, it's all fine with me. These are all nitpicks, anyway. DOOM's good aspects are all but self-evident. Explaining why this game is fun would be like explaining the appeal of the whole medium.