I remember when I was a kid, around 5 or 6 years old, and I used to love playing Kinect Sports on our Xbox. But one day, my mom wouldn't let me play because I hadn't done my chores. I was so mad that I stormed off to my room, plotting my revenge. Then, I got a mischievous idea while sitting on the toilet. I won't go into details, but let's just say I tried to play a prank involving catching my own poop. It didn't go well the first time, but the next day, I was determined. Fast forward a few weeks, and my parents were puzzled by a strange smell in their bedroom. Little did they know, I had hidden my "experiment" under their bed. They were horrified when they found it, and even blamed it on someone else! To this day, they still don't know the truth.

Score: 1/10

A game made with much love in RPG-maker, I had a great time with Felvidek. The humor is top notch, and the graphics are absolutely gorgeous, especially during the cutscenes. I loved the environment and the fight style, and really loved having an RPG party with a 15th-century priest helping you fight. There was lots of humor involving the time period, including jokes at the past's expense, that I felt played pretty well. 15th-century Slovakia is interesting because well, there was no Slovakia! The area was probably under Hungarian rule at this point (...maybe German, who knows), with threat from the Ottoman's eventually taking over as well. It's a topic brought up often in the game, and I feel it makes Felvidek even cooler! Not only does it focus on an uncommon setting for a video game, but it focuses on a precise group within the time-period on top of it all.

The music is great, the art is gorgeous, and the gameplay is fun! Check Felvidek out if you can, it's a very strong game released into the 2024 pool that's worth checking out if you're interested in playing some indie goodies from this year.

3.5/5

Instant Brain is a Japan only release from Cave, the makers of many of the best shmups ever released. A departure from their usual format, Instant Brain goes down the other route most Japan only 360 games go for and is a visual novel. Now these are pretty difficult to review. I'm not opposed to visual novels, video games as a media are made better with variety and I have enjoyed some translated versions myself such as coffee talk on the Xbox one. Yet, without being able to speak Japanese this one is a tough sell. If you are not familiar with this type of game, it's basically an interactive story where you read what the characters have to say and can respond by choosing dialogue options which affect how the game plays out and if this doesn't sound appealing I can see why. In most cases these games are also a bit creepy and pervy, featuring lots of boobs basically. Instant Brain is no exception on this regard, the majority of the characters are big booby women and you also unlock some particularly creepy pictures of them. I'm not sure if this is common in other forms of media, but it's really off-putting and I really wish they didn't go for this smutty vibe. Now with all these issues, I will say IB seems like one of the better visual novels on the console. The story, while I didn't fully understand, seems more interesting. It is split up into chapters, each of which being a murder investigation. You need to use your camera to take photos and find clues within the photos to find out who killed the victim. It's not too difficult to follow and there are some interesting characters along the way. IF you understand Japanese, I actually think this would be a lot of fun despite being a bit word heavy. Now hears the thing, this disk includes one of the greatest shmups of all time, Dodonpachi. You do have to unlock it, but its really worth the price of admission alone and is basically the main reason I recommend this.

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Super buen juego de terror inspirado en cuentos Europeos, su temática es muy oscura y está bastante bien hecha, inicia "lento" pero cada vez que avances y encuentras nuevas historias cada una se vuelve más interesante y oscura con sus villanos bastante aterradores.
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Su gameplay consiste en ser un plataformero con ligeros puzzles y que es bastante lineal.
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Algo malo es que aveces con la posición de la cámara se llega a tener problemas pero nada grave y que ciertas peleas se siente feas y metidas con lo mínimo.

A fairly crappy dance game with very few features. Hip Hop Dance Experience is saved by being full of bangers. There's a real lack of game modes, a seriously terrible training section and the body detection is basically broken. I mean you can stand still and the game still seems to think you are dancing. I also felt like the game did a pretty poor job at telling you if you are doing a well or not. You feel like you have done great in a level, every move you do is getting positive feedback but then at the end of the level you end up with a 58% rating. Really not sure what I am doing playing this. It's saved by the track list though. Bangers. Love me some 00s hip hop. Just get the song list and stick it on Spotify.

I'm not sure if I could trust anyone that actually likes this visual novel if I'm being real. I honestly only played this because I had "Saya's Song" stuck in my head for like a week and thought to myself at 1 AM today to finally give the stupid VN a go (knowing I wasn't going to like it). Anyways I did manage to play it through in like 3 sittings since it was short but Jesus Christ was it actually awful. I also got every ending so before any dudebro with nonce particles inside them gets rowdy thinking I only got one ending or something, CALM DOWN.

I liked certain concepts of the game such as Saya being a sort of "idol" to Fuminori, but I genuinely wished the game didn't try cramming down stupid unnecessary sex scenes down our throats like "heh... isn't this EVIL and DARKSIDED? take a glimpse at Urobuchi's DARK and TWISTED mind... heh". Like great, thanks Urobuchi I don't like you. Everyone and their grandma is like nnooo nooo these sexual scenes are supposed to cement how far gone Fuminori is and how he's losing his humanity and like it's to show how he and Saya are the only lonely people in each other's worlds and- BLAH BLAH BLAH I DONT CARE. IT SUCKS. If I'm being real the sex scenes with Fuminori feel like an excuse for men to find a way to feel aroused during these scenes because clearly they were trying to hit some sort of erotic points for the reader. There are so many things that could have been done better to still prove that Fuminori is a horrible human being without it resorting to sex. I had to keep skipping the h scenes and their dialogue because why would any sane person want to see a grown ass man doing all of that to someone who looks like a ten year old. If I had a nickel for how many times I saw the word manhood as a replacement for the word penis I'd have enough money to fly to Japan and drop an anvil on Urobuchi's head.

Anyways, I just don't appreciate how pessimistic and misanthropic this visual novel is, and I guess I'm glad I finally played through this myself so I can mentally throw rocks and strike people with psychic beams anytime I see someone praise this horrendous piece of slop.

I just don't know how its possible for a video game to make me just so extremely miserable....
I've been holding off from writing a review for months since I finished the game, but I think I can finally sit down now and gather some of my thoughts.

I think even now, Silent Hill 2 holds up for being an incredible narrative with a wonderful atmosphere and soundtrack. I wouldn't change a single thing about this game.
The voice acting in this game is just so amazingly awkward in the best way possible. Guy Cihi may not be a great guy but he's the best voice for James Sunderland and I'll die on that hill (haha get it.....)

From the very beginning of Silent Hill 2 to the very end I was immersed in it's atmosphere. The ambient noises are so so eerie, and some of the storytelling through actions and interacting with items was very fun. The only gripe I really had with the gameplay was the camera angle, but I quickly got used to it after 30 minutes or so.

The best thing about this game, however, by far is the main protagonist James Sunderland. He just feels so real... his actions and thoughts and his inner turmoil as he tries to find his wife in Silent Hill is so gut wrenching. I felt like I was watching this dude go through a mental illness simulator and all I could do was sit back and feel awful.
I remember for MONTHS after finishing Silent Hill 2 I literally couldn't listen to the soundtrack or think about any of the characters without tearing up... Which is a problem especially if you're walking around in public.

I know a lot of people may find this game overrated, but I don't think I'll ever find a video game that tackles serious subjects in such and interesting and heartbreaking way again.
I'd do anything to replay this game completely blind.

This game is a technical marvel and it plays really well too. Taking a horizontal shmup series and putting it into the gameplay of something like Space Harrier is no easy task. The game features lots of spectacle, challenge, and lots of opportunities to get a huge high score. The presentation and audio is still as good as usual for the Cotton series with the only unfortunate absence being the cutscenes for every level now being only for the opening and ending of the game. It’ll probably take you a few attempts to beat the game as it can be pretty hard and you only have one life and a few continues. Try to play well to achieve more life.

While the impressive presentation is an amazing achievement for the system, it comes with the unfortunate problem of the framerate being a bit low. It’s not the worst but it sucks that there will probably never be a good FPS version of the game. With that said however you should definitely try the game out as it’s one of the finest shmups on the system with a lot of replayability. It also has seen a modern rerelease though be warned that make sure you update it as it launched with inaccurate emulation. It also features a new translation but a fan one also exists. Sadly getting an original copy is expensive, especially brand new. Hope you enjoy this incredible game or at least get to enjoy the visuals and fast pace.

Friends, loved ones, we gather here today to remember our good friend Hi-Fi Rush

The cliche saying "life comes at you fast" is apt to describe Hi-Fi Rush. It simultaneously announced and released at the end of what I would generously describe as a very mid Xbox game presentation in January 2023 to the delight of half-asleep gamers watching everywhere.

Hi-Fi Rush is rhythm-based character action game that had unique gameplay. It was forgiving to casual audiences so as to acclimate them to rhythm aspects of the game, but had aspects about it that made it the most hardcore character action game out there if you wanted it to be. If you wanted the highest ranking. If you wanted Chai to be holding a real guitar, you had to earn that shit in blood.

The game embraced a fun cast of characters. Embraced a saturday morning cartoon setting and story. It made Xenogears references when half-jokingly describing running out of budget for the last act of the game. It had licensed music from bands like Nine Inch Nails. Hi-Fi Rush was truly a hi-fi rush that made thousands of people think the game was tailor-made for them. Simply by being more in line with what people actually like. It was nice to see as such cases of personality and life being that it was rare to see such on a major publisher level.

Hi-Fi Rush was pushed out into the world to be loved, and to help boost a rapidly dying gaming platform, but actually mostly that first thing...

But mostly that second thing, actually.

The cancer of corporate consolidation and power, a time when optimal financialization is the only language those unrightfully holding the reigns of the industry speak. That is what killed a moderately successful game studio. Lack of passion or enthusiasm didn't kill Hi-Fi Rush. A financial officer running numbers and determining a sequel would make X amount of dollars less than a Call of Duty skin killed Hi-Fi Rush.

So as we lay them down to rest, we celebrate Hi-Fi Rush as it reminded gamers of a time when all games both big and small were released to be enjoyed unconditionally; with the upfront price tag of exceptional games were the beginning, middle and end of what was asked to own it.

Sadly, those days are snuffed out. You must now rent and subscribe to begin to be pumped with complicit, tedious gameplay trends that feel more diluted with every repackaging. Will we die with capitalism? Probably. Shit crazy out here, b.

Whether or not you cherished the life of Tango, or it's products like Evil Within or Hi-Fi Rush, you must understand that gaming on consoles is dead. Dead until the console platform holders release their own Steam Deck and it's probably going to be lame as fuck compared to a Steam Deck if your name is not Nintendo, but whatever.

Rest in peace, Hi-Fi Rush.

To truly appreciate Guilty Gear Strive, you need to approach it with a certain level of understanding and appreciation for its intricacies. Much like vaping, the game's depth and complexity might not be immediately apparent to everyone. The stunning visuals, tight gameplay, and unique character roster require a level of skill and insight that goes beyond simple button-mashing. Just as vaping enthusiasts have a deep appreciation for the art of blowing clouds, fans of Guilty Gear Strive understand the nuances of its combat system and character interactions. Those who dismiss it as just another fighting game are missing out on something truly special. Guilty Gear Strive is not just a game; it's a statement, a philosophy, a way of life. So, while some may not understand it, for those who do, it's an experience like no other.

Score: 8/10