I found this one harsher than its sequels, which might have been the case due to the limited item pool, or perhaps because I was less familiar with the game's inner workings

Cute, tidy, trenchant trip

My playthrough of this game must have been fairly singular, for, being grossly engrossed in this series' lore as I am, I knew it like the back of my hand beforehand. Apropos of the gameplay, it whilom drained my soul with every play session by virtue of its tension-inducing punishment. Some refinements to the undying formula burn brighter than others, but whilst only ashes remain of the world design of the chosen first one, the level design has been rekindled, nigh-on as incandescent, perchance.

KERO KERO KERO LLEGÓ LA HORA, VENIMOS A SEMBRAR EL MIEDO

I didn't expect this game to wind up being such a blissful outing

It's a fun game to jump around in. If some quests weren’t as roundabout as the way of raking through the world is, maybe I’d have less of a monkey on my back and more of the pigs in their bags.

I came looking for a new type of control scheme to try out and found a set of thorough universal mechanics and a unique cast of charismatic characters, which make up a fighting game that rocks through and through. It’s the kind of game the top-level play footage of which I drool over. Baiken main (not that it matters, I don't have basic fighting game fundamentals down).

Andaluces de Jaén,
aceituneros altivos,
decidme en el alma: ¿de quién?
¿De quién son estos olivos?

Alfheim shed light on the game's penumbra, thereby obliquely guiding bitches into a flamboyant play style more suitable for a witch. Bayonetta’s sensual moves likewise seduced me, enough for me to reach her climax, even if only once in a blue moon. Combos gracefully extended via offset dodges are the real crux of the combat system and engender a feeling of glamour which is nothing short of glorious. Devoting myself to one of these games is a temptation I’m looking forward to giving in to.

A small Enemy Step for Dante, a giant leap for Kamiya kino.

“It is time to end your pitiful life NOW”

In lieu of the lugubrious presentation and unwieldy controls à la Resident Evil at the inception of the series’ lineage, blue-blooded boss battles would gain ascendancy in its pedigree from this game on. These might not capitalise on Dante’s full, expanded arsenal the way they did in the original, but they tower over those in terms of putting the "show" in “Showtime!” Instead of sticking to my guns the whole time like in its prequel, I opted for Royalguard Style and it was a hell of a ride.

tun-tururuntun tun-tururuntun tun “¡Eh, que nos vamos de vacaciones a Asso!” tururururún

The true Metroidvania. I really wish I had gone blind into this pilgrimage like I did with Super Metroid, ‘cause my jaw would’ve been dropping harder than the Gaping Dragon’s. This is some of the most fun I’ve had exploring and role-playing in a video game (at least until I gave in and donned Havel’s Armour). Sadly, knowing beforehand the binoculars are the best weapon in the game trivialises it. That didn’t stop Ornstein and Smough from piercing my boar-headed, axe-wielding ass a new one.

Forasmuch as I never appear to be getting anywhere, I haven’t made enough progress to be making such bold statements, but I came into the game expecting a Metroidvania and, much to my surprise, what was awaiting me was a Metroid1ia, a seemingly endless one at that. I might do as with that game and look up a guide, damning as that may be. The only thing I want to know is how to begin to tackle this game. Maybe I just haven't committed hard enough to what the game asks of me.