in no other game can you write about the "bloody battles" of The Civil War while Mario's smiling head happily floats above

all of the speed-based challenges are just a test of how much you trust kawashima to correctly guess which number you scribbled out. hope he hasn't forgotten what an 8 looks like!

a floor-to-ceiling tapestry that’s beautiful when viewed from a reasonable distance, yet one that reveals itself as comprised of overwhelmingly many uninteresting elements when viewed a bit closer, and yet whose imperfect-but-trying-to-be-flawless individual brushstrokes create a sense of discontent when viewed even closer.

after taking a long hiatus from video games and engaging with creative projects in general, I was feeling mentally ready to approach one as huge as this. RDR2 has sat within my mind for a long time as having exquisite detail and a gripping narrative. and the first of those is undoubtedly true. picking up on every little flourish that was otherwise so natural it had escaped my notice was always a great experience.

but at some point, I had to begin to wonder: is this what games really are for me? so much of the experience here boils down to “talk to this person, hold W for a few minutes while they exchange dialogue, walk a little bit, shoot 50 cowboys, get rewarded.” every mission is an errand. RDR2 is Getting Groceries Simulator but You Also Have to Shoot a Bunch of Guys Sometimes. (good lord, there’s a ridiculously video-game-ified sense here that made me feel like I was playing an NES game where enemies just infinitely respawn when you bring them back on screen) this doesn’t feel like a video game except for the parts where it feels too much like a video game. I think I play video games mostly to have fun in the act of playing them; good story or other elements that tag along is a nice bonus to my experience. I just don’t find the systems in this game fun. walk here, ride there, alright, I get it.

trying to reorient my mindset to treat this game differently led to more missteps. once I was introduced to the cinematic camera, I wanted to use it all the time given it would make the experience feel more like I was watching a movie or TV show. but it doesn't feel the game was made for this. camera angles look randomly generated, getting stuck behind trees, or shoving Arthur to one side of the screen leaving a lot of empty space. and good luck trying to control Arthur, especially when camera angles switch. removing the HUD and letterboxing the frame doesn’t help much for immersion when I run into someone I couldn’t have seen or my horse immediately switches direction because the camera angle suddenly faces the complete opposite direction. not a great sign when the only way to progress the game forward becomes a complete slog.

and outside of the missions, I simply felt no desire to further inspect anything in the world. there’s plants, hunting, fishing, running into random NPCs, gambling, fashion choices, horse choices, and, god, so much choice overload that I couldn’t bring myself to care about any of it. I never once went into a store or other location outside of mission relevance because I never felt the need to. I hardly ever used any consumables yet still felt the need to loot every Bad Guy I shot down. maybe if I had gotten involved in each extra activity as it was added, or maybe if there was more purpose to engaging with them, I would have felt more inclined to check them out, I don’t know for sure.

what I do know is that I just stopped playing this one day about two weeks ago and haven’t thought about it until this morning with absolutely zero desire to pick it up again. I was never engrossed in the story enough to have any care of what happens to these characters, I was never in the mood to just ride around the world, I was never feeling like I was doing more than merely checking off a list of tasks to make some fictional entity give me 2 fictional dollars that I would never use on some fictional bottle of alcohol. and I think that’s simply not what I want out of video games.

probably the cutest game to feature the kkk

1993

dude lookin like a ketchup and mustard klan member

imagine the timeline where this game released in Japan as another Mario 1 with stages even harder than Lost Levels and The West got a reskinned version of a Goemon game or something

wish this game had something more to it (don't know what) because diving at full speed into an uncontrollable nap soundtracked to an archetypal 90s hype jungle mix is true gaming

surprised by how many levels completely passed over me with nothing interesting going on in them. there's a good handful of fun stages but an almost equal amount where it feels like you just hold right and occasionally press jump when an enemy appears atop the completely flat ground. hard to critique though because every speck of this game feels perfectly as it should be, likely due to its immense legacy. a good time to return to every so often.

this dude's lifelong dream was to have his own ship yet he named it Kingweenzer lmaoooo no wonder it sunk

2021

nicely cute though doesn't fully scratch the itch I was hoping for. maybe the artstyle puts me off a smidge.
the larger problem I have is that things feel too one-dimensional. too many of the items you receive along the way are one-use. I would have loved to see more challenges that utilized different recurring mechanics rather than "here's this clothing that you'll use for one photo and forget about wearing until the next piece of clothing replaces it," ESPECIALLY the filters which I was expecting to have a lot of potential. I didn't 100% the game so perhaps there's more that mix-and-match than I encountered?
the music and world are nice, the act of photography feels snappy (haha), I merely wish those good aspects could have been allowed to flourish even more.

both very much for me yet so overboard with the pandering-to-excessively-online-people that I quickly started to hate it.
the gameplay is fun and the world is colorful. I ABSOLUTELY NEED more games with great movement that are entirely about chatting with neat characters without any extra systems or challenges that get in the way.
my problem is how elbow-nudgingly aware the presentation felt. you make friends with furries! you collect cassette tapes! there's a Tamagotchi you can play with! the coins say "MEOW! MEOW!"! the shipping container island is filled with default cubes (us silly game developers)! one of the cute characters is actually DARK!!
I found the fox who had four screens of Discord open and closed the game.
even with the pronounced spotlight on the precious characters and pastel world, the game has moments where it gets in the way of itself being able to do so. the helper frog box that appeared in the corner stating that I seemed to be stuck when I was just exploring the island on my own terms was notable, but the more prevalent hiccup was with camera angles during dialogue. the camera during gameplay is fantastic and never gave me an awkward view, but so many times when I talked to a character did the camera flip around to some weird shot where characters were covering each other and I couldn't clearly see what I thought the game was touting as its strongest selling point.
if you love this game, I totally get it; I know there's an ever so slightly different version of myself that does too.

mario party minigames with some of that Good Ol' Japanese Magic (cocaine)

a meander through surrealist pacman mazes of indiscernible emotions. exploration-focused games are by far my favorite, and using the medium simply to express art and create vague experiences is what I want to see more of. also the skulls make silly noises