lizardmwk
BACKER
2019
Nifty lil tower defense, powered by the clicker-economy solar panel mechanics of Spaceplan. Synthy music and aesthetics are on point, if monotonous. Spin plates, splat bugs. Nothing else to it than that, but what’s there is well made.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2021
Angry Birds is the glass of plain 2% milk of video games.
Still, this one doesn’t have microtransactions so it’s instantly better than all previous iterations. So, alright: 3% milk in this case. Fair?
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Still, this one doesn’t have microtransactions so it’s instantly better than all previous iterations. So, alright: 3% milk in this case. Fair?
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
When I got to the grid-based tactics portion of the game-- after the howlingly awful, Made-In-Dreams-style animation of the opening dialogue scene-- well, it's not as bad as I was expecting but also not as deep or interesting as the devs were probably aiming for.
Played 5 of the 40 levels and given infinite time I would've played through the rest, but there are many dozens of better tactics games in this space that do the fighty bits better and feature characters that do not appear to be carved out of wobbly hotdog parts.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Played 5 of the 40 levels and given infinite time I would've played through the rest, but there are many dozens of better tactics games in this space that do the fighty bits better and feature characters that do not appear to be carved out of wobbly hotdog parts.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
“A throwback to the classic arcade platformers” insofar as its a competently-made but completely vapid riff on Qbert & Frogger. I played about five minutes of it and have zero interest in going back for a sixth. I could imagine a kid of a certain age getting obsessed with it though and then descending their entire household into a murderous fury via the bland, chirpy sound design of every level.
Avoid.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Avoid.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
Cute! It’s neat that you don’t actually have to win at the card game battles, since the story is just about a kid at a new school trying to make some friends. That said, you do spend about 80% of your time playing cards, and the card game is so similar to Hearthstone that I… would just rather be playing Hearthstone tbh.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
A novel idea for a puzzle game— see wut I did there— but not one that strikes me as particularly challenging or fun. Feels like a junior grade homework assignment, to be honest.
If English was a second language for me, I could see this being a good way to practice, but as a native speaker I’d just as well prefer to read these books instead of play with a gamified version.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
If English was a second language for me, I could see this being a good way to practice, but as a native speaker I’d just as well prefer to read these books instead of play with a gamified version.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
if someone can describe your game as “bad QWOP” you’ve gone done and effed up somewhere, son
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
Looks great, plays fine. Probably more fun in co-op but that’s every action RPG ever. Unfortunately, storywise this saga has about as much narrative heft as Candy Crush.
Perhaps a fun harmless thing for a parent and young kid to play together, but not much else going on here.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Perhaps a fun harmless thing for a parent and young kid to play together, but not much else going on here.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
A beloved Dreamcast game back in the day, but honestly feels a bit basic now.
I used to be all about these programatic puzzle games like ChuChu and Lemmings, but 20 years on my puzzle perversion has leveled-up to total sicko status and I’d prefer to be spending my time with something truly byzantine like Exapunks or Baba Is You.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
I used to be all about these programatic puzzle games like ChuChu and Lemmings, but 20 years on my puzzle perversion has leveled-up to total sicko status and I’d prefer to be spending my time with something truly byzantine like Exapunks or Baba Is You.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2018
oops I think I have gotten too good at Lumines
this is still nice to just head-empty-no-thoughts to, but thirty minutes into every run-- with my board still looking as clean & tidy as Marie Kondo’s kitchen-- I tend to just lose interest and hold down to stack out.
The music will always be good but Electronic Symphony’s was better. Despite my middling rating here, I would instantly pay money for an expansion that added in the soundtracks from Live, Supernova and Symphony. Mizuguchi get at me. 📞
this is still nice to just head-empty-no-thoughts to, but thirty minutes into every run-- with my board still looking as clean & tidy as Marie Kondo’s kitchen-- I tend to just lose interest and hold down to stack out.
The music will always be good but Electronic Symphony’s was better. Despite my middling rating here, I would instantly pay money for an expansion that added in the soundtracks from Live, Supernova and Symphony. Mizuguchi get at me. 📞
2019
Supremely stupid Apple Arcade launch game. A minigame collection with a maximally generic Olympics vibe and music.
There are many things Apple Arcade could’ve become, and “what if Newgrounds circa 2005” is certainly one idea to put up on the ol’ whiteboard, but I’m very glad it’s moved in a different direction since launch.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
There are many things Apple Arcade could’ve become, and “what if Newgrounds circa 2005” is certainly one idea to put up on the ol’ whiteboard, but I’m very glad it’s moved in a different direction since launch.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
2019
meh. I get how this is a dungeon-themed solitaire roguelite, a la Meteorfall, and that’s a known genre that some people enjoy. I just don’t think this one’s a particularly interesting or rewarding one.
The ruleset feels overly simplistic, and the finish-what-you-start rule in particular just feels like anti-fun with the way it forces you to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory for no other reason than “well, thems the rules”. Pass.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
The ruleset feels overly simplistic, and the finish-what-you-start rule in particular just feels like anti-fun with the way it forces you to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory for no other reason than “well, thems the rules”. Pass.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Still well-written, incredibly weird, and unique. I first finished the original more than half my life ago, though, and despite the graphical spruce-up, PS:T still feels old now.
Think I'm entering a phase now where I enjoy games from this era more as artifacts than as experiences. Good for talking about and occasionally touching, but perhaps not something I'll want to play front to back.
Think I'm entering a phase now where I enjoy games from this era more as artifacts than as experiences. Good for talking about and occasionally touching, but perhaps not something I'll want to play front to back.
2019
A just-different-enough-to-avoid-legal-action remake of Spy Hunter.
The thing about Spy Hunter though is it’s a classic NES game based on a quarter-eating arcade game, so it’s hard as balls. Agent Intercept has a surprisingly slick, cinematic flow to it, but the driving amounts to vaguely swiping left and right while holding down the boost button. Sometimes you dramatically turn into a boat?
Nice effort, but too easy.
(Tempted to give +1 star just for HQ’s tight mohawk, but nah)
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
The thing about Spy Hunter though is it’s a classic NES game based on a quarter-eating arcade game, so it’s hard as balls. Agent Intercept has a surprisingly slick, cinematic flow to it, but the driving amounts to vaguely swiping left and right while holding down the boost button. Sometimes you dramatically turn into a boat?
Nice effort, but too easy.
(Tempted to give +1 star just for HQ’s tight mohawk, but nah)
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
Decided on a whim to try all the first-batch Apple Arcade games.
I’ve never even played Ridiculous Fishing but within seconds of launching this one I was like “oh it’s a Ridiculous Fishing clone.” Cute bunnies tho! I admire the depth and baseline quality of this, but the mechanics are sorta wonky and it’s just not that fun. Pass.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]
I’ve never even played Ridiculous Fishing but within seconds of launching this one I was like “oh it’s a Ridiculous Fishing clone.” Cute bunnies tho! I admire the depth and baseline quality of this, but the mechanics are sorta wonky and it’s just not that fun. Pass.
\ [Apple Arcade ranked \]