what the fuck is Elden Ring a new Lego Star Wars game is dropping

Pretty sure I got kicked out of a friend group for not playing enough of this shitter ass game lmao

I have not finished the game. Not even close. But I NEEDED to make a review right now to talk about one thing that Fromsoft almost always nails: The soundtrack.

This. Fucking. Soundtrack. Not enough people are talking about this absolute KING SHIT. Legitmatley my new favorite game OST. I have no clue how From continues to pull it off but the sound department kills it. Every. Single. Time.

Such an amazing roster of composers: you've got new talent from Yoshimi Kudo and Tai Tomisawa; you've got Fromsoft sound veterans Shoi Miyazawa and Tsukasa Saitoh making their debut as composers; and of course the heavyweight Yuka Kitamura returns to somehow continue a hot streak of quality tracks. There is such an amazing variety of absolutely fantastic, bombastic, emotional, and beautiful OSTs that the game doesn't even know where to put them all. (The Godskins absolutely do NOT fucking deserve their theme.) Literally some of the bosses go from alright to A-tier fights from presentation and music alone.

There is one particular boss theme that I will not spoil here, but I just want to say that Fromsoftware has not gone this hard on an organ since 2009. You'll instantly know it once you hear it.

Literally if you don't even play this game at all, I don't care. Just listen to the OST. It's that good. Some of the ambient overworld tracks are just kinda OK, but everything else is perfection.


The launch of the switch was a renaissance period for Nintendo. After an era hard-carried by second-party developers and delivering games for huge franchises that didn't really live up to the legacy of those big names, the Switch delivered a ton of first-party games that could be and would be argued as the best games in their respective franchises. Zelda got BOTW (lets be real, it's a Switch game); Mario got Odyssey, a game which stood out against the recent slog of the stale "New" moniker and allowed 3D World some much-needed breathing room and retrospection; and Smash got Ultimate, which gave everybody their hopes and dreams. Three Houses, New Horizons, Luigi's Mansion 3: For those first 3 years of the Switch, Nintendo was on fire; many most respected franchises finally got out of this strange rut as the lineup continued to grow. By 2020, things started to slow down. New Horizons had a promising start but a lack of substatinal updates sort of killed the game despite it's massive early success, and Ultimate's poor online and lack of substantial fighter buffs or nerfs killed the competetive scene. However, over the summer, we got that one glorious trailer, that one time where every fucking star aligned, that light at the end of a somewhat disappointing couples years for Nintendo and gaming overall.

Finally, Metroid gets her renaissance.

What a good game dude. Oh my god. comparable to Super for me. After no news on Prime 4 and a long, painful dark age for the franchise, MercurySteam has effectively resurrected the franchise, building off of what they learned in Samus Returns and improving on it's flaws.

In response to Samus Returns, Areas are larger, backtracking is more well-paced, and 100 percenting it is really fun. Sequence breaks—although I didn't actually try them yet myself—are not only possible but deliberate. (Though I wish there were more sequence-breaking secrets aside from Kraid.) The counter is more natural, controls are much better without the touchscreen, I like how missle types are straight upgrades rather than individual missiles. Enemy, boss, and area variety is vastly improved. There are repeated bossfights, but it's not to the cartoonish degree that Samus Returns took things.

The boss fights in particular are fantastic, it gets that nice balance of frustration with the first few encounters and confidence after learning their patterns. Dread is also well-designed in tandem with Samus' toolkit. For the most part each power-up is useful to a certain extent. Even when they're replaced by a better upgrade—like the Gray Suit or the Space jump—you'll have already spent plenty of time with most of the upgrades so they don't feel like wasted tools. Samus herself controls very well and for once my hands don't cramp up when I play a Metroid game. Just the right speed, just the right jump, just the right movement control.

The item puzzles and exploration are really engaging, just as fun and rewarding as the combat. The game will automatically tell you if there is a hidden powerup in the vicinity which helps with backtracking, as well as the very detailed map which tells you which items you've already obtained. Some of the Shinespark puzzles are a bit too obtuse for my tastes, but overall it's a game that always leads you on the right direction. EMMIs are a really neat side-concept that ups the intensity. Dread is short, but Metroid games should be short. I think it's that perfect length where you don't get exhausted of it.

Graphically the game is no slouch either—There's plenty of atmosphere to go around. I love all the detail put into the little animations and interactions. The backgrounds are nice, the lighting is great, the character design and art direction is vastly improved over SR. Sound design is also a lot better. The Pulse Scan is way less obnoxious, thank the fucking lord. I don't want tinnitus every time I want to find a hidden fucking block.

I really like how Mercury was able to bring Samus to life without her speaking any comprehensible language. It's the ways she composes herself and the really fun action cutscenes that make her feel cool and confident, yet she does express very nuanced expression and emotion when required. She's been doing this bounty hunter gig for years now, but she's not without emotion or character.

This game is just awesome man, I'm so glad it exists.

As for some criticism, there are some uninteresting environments like Artaria and Dairion, but other areas like Ghavorahn and Burenia look fantastic and go really far with atmospheric immersion. The EMMI sections are tense but there's no real stakes considering you just get booted out right in front of the door instead of the save rooms, which basically serve zero purpose. I wish that the stealth was more involved with the EMMIs, the concept of tracking based off of sound is really not taken far enough and just ends up being annoying at some points. Why are put separate energy and Ammo refills when there is literally a statue that does both in the game? They're also scattered around at random for no reason and are mostly pointless. Cross bombs are pointless outside a few puzzles and are basically replaced by the Power bomb (they're literally tied to the same button.) Same with the Speed Booster: while it is used for a lot of fun puzzles, it doesn't really get too much utility outside of mandatory obstacles.

The story is really bad. A lot of exposition dumps and needless twists, and way too much is backloading into the end of the game. I wish that final X-parasite was more of a fight, or at least built up for longer. Let's be honest though: it's a Nintendo game. The story never really matters all that much.

My biggest complaint is honestly with the music. It fucking sucks man, why does a Nintendo game, much less a Metroid game, have bad music?

The purple EMMI fucking sucks. Pre-gravity suit, it's CBT.

And then there's that question of linearity. Each area is very disappointingly self-contained which is something I didn't like about Samus Returns that carried over here. Granted, teleporters, elevators, and trams are placed to allow areas to connect in a very non-linear way, however there are problems with this:

1. The load times. They should not be this fucking long. Odyssey and BOTW have way shorter loaddtimes for much larger, more graphically taxing games.

2. There's still not really a whole lot of natural connectivity or shortcuts, even in those self-contained areas.

Again, contrary to everyone else, I do like the level layout. While it is pretty linear, it doesn't feel like it considering how you're constantly moving around and backtracking through different areas with how the entrances and exits are placed.

So, how does it measure up to Super Metroid? Everyone wants to know that.

Ok. Let's talk about this.

I really don't feel like it's fair to compare and criticize Dread, or the other Metroid games, based on the undisputed (queen) of the franchise. Of course it's not going to be able to compare to Super Metroid—because I really don't think we'll ever be getting another game with that kind of level design, at least from Nintendo.

Super Metroid was this sort of miracle game. The developers miraculously found this perfect balance between elaborate, labyrinthine, and complicated design structure with a deliberate and well-planned pacing, where every room was the sum of a larger whole. And even then, there were some strange hiccups like Madria which became almost too obtuse.

Super Metroid was from that era of innovation where game development could take risks because the medium was still in it's infancy, and even then Super just barley scraped by into becoming profitable and the franchise was in limbo until Prime rolled around. As the first actual, new Metroid game in 14 fucking years, I can understand that Nintendo didn't want to take the risk of trying to emulate Super Metroid's level design while not making it derivative of Super Metroid's design. It's so frustrating to see people knock this game down a peg and ignore the very obvious strengths it has over Super Metroid, because Super seems to be the only game in the franchise with the level design people want out of Metroid—so is it really that fair to let it define the entire series?

So is Dread better than Super Metroid? No. Dread does some things better than Super, and Super does things better than Dread. Overall, this is an excellent return to form for a franchise that has been struggling for almost 14 years now. Absolutely my Game of the Year (mostly because I haven't really played any other 2021 game yet.) I can't wait to see what MercurySteam and Retro have in store for us—as long as they actually fucking credit their employees next time.

The only time I ever used this app was to fuck around in the chat rooms with my two siblings and spew random nonsense to make each other laugh our asses off.

I would not trade that for the fucking world.

This is the game that people who never played Dark Souls imagine Dark Souls is like


The culture around this is really starting to get aggressively unfunny and cringe

Can the "this game=sex" joke die now before it goes any further

This review contains spoilers

From one play-through alone, this game has become my second-favorite Fromsoft title. It may be the easiest game in the series, but the beauty of Demon's Souls lies in it's restriant, consistency, and atmospheric immersion. The level design has this sense of verticality and realism that can't be found anywhere else, not to mention the non-linearity the hub world allows. I love Dark Souls, but when comparing Anor Londo's schizophrenic and confusing level layout and Boletaria's tight, realistic approach to storming a castle, the difference is night and day.

Even though the bosses are relatively easy they feel so unique and have a completely different vibe that the other games have used elements of in some of their bossfights but not to the same affect. Don't get me wrong, Soulsborne has amazing bosses across the table-only one boss from Demon's, the Tower Knight, barely even makes it to my top 10-but these bosses still feel much more different from the rest, puzzling tests of wit, or cinematic, or strikingly depressing. Leechmonger and the Adjudicator have these unique vertical arenas where you can approach the fight in different ways. The aforementioned Tower Knight is an intimidating and multi-layered fight, where you have to defeat a wave of archers before facing the Knight alone by exploiting his weak points. Maiden Aestrea doesn't even fight you-rather her followers defend their saint until their last breath. She commits suicide with bitter comtempt, anger, and genuine sadness in her voice, having just seen you kill the very people she was trying to save by becoming a Demon. The Storm King is more cinematic where you use a wind sword to fell a gargantuan monster who barely even acknowledges your existence with it's sheer size, creating powerful gusts of wind that blow you away. Dragon God seems like this climactic rematch built up from the opening animation, but subverts these notions by having you effectively euthanize it after restraining it. (Because really, how else would you take out a towering behemoth? With a fucking pool noodle of a sword?) The final boss of the game is a shambling abomination that can barely muster the strength to flail at you. Each boss is visually unique and each have their own weaknesses to exploit or explore a certain gimmick, and each help set the downtrodden mood and melancholy tone of the game. I would go so far to say that there are no bad bosses in the game. Some underwhelming or easy, yes, but none truly bad.

You can see the groundwork being laid for the rest of the series as well as inspirations for it's sequels, but at the same time Demon's Souls still took bold risks and still has many unique ideas that make it worth playing 12 years later. Where other games would dump tutorial levels and screens on you while holding your hand through the game, Demon’s Souls kicked you into a starting level against a boss that’s supposed to kill you. Where most games were beautiful, bright, and pushed console hardware to their limits, Demon’s Souls was dark, muted, and fantastically reserved in it's artstyle to set it apart. Where other games had flashy combat with hundreds of (admittedly shallow) options, Demon's introduced a methodical and restrained combat system that limited the player's actions greatly through a stamina bar. Where most games had insane boss fights with over-the-top presentation, the bosses in Demon's Souls felt melancholy and dreary. Where other games had a bombastic, catchy, adrenaline-fueled soundtrack, Demon’s Souls was silent except for the growls of enemies and the clanking of swords; Boss themes were subtle, quiet, and ambient. Most games would introduce large exposition dumps and force a story you might not care about onto a player, Demon's Souls leaves it's well-realized lore in the background as an afterthought that doesn't get in the way of gameplay. Most games had a large cast of supporting characters, but Demon’s Souls friendly NPCs were few and far between and could be killed like any other enemy. Where some games were forgiving, Souls was not: mechanics such as World Tendency and the soul/human form punished the unprepared or ignorant player, making a game where to survive one must remain ever-vigilant and assess every situation and room. These "most" games aren’t bad by any means-in fact quite the opposite, they can be incredible-but Demons Souls is simply so different and unique, even when compared to its spiritual sequels.

The best example of Demon's rejection of the modern video game environment is in the Moonlight Greatsword, which has been a staple in every Fromsoft game. In the King's Field series, it was a legendary weapon, a crucial macguffin in the plot of the games. Here, it is a forgotten relic of the past: an afterthought swallowed by slugs, in a cesspit at the bottom of the world.

More than any other Fromsoft game, Demon's souls is a fading medieval fantasy slowly being swallowed by colorless fog. Much like Miyazaki's inspiration for his storytelling, it's a fairytale book written in undecipherable language, making for a game that never pulls back the curtain all the way. Despite how dreary the game can get, at the end of journey there is hope and optimism to be had, a hope which the player can snuff out if they feel inclined to do so. The sense of adventure, progression, and immersion from this game is more enticing than any other game I've ever played. I went from a frail nobody seeking glory to a feared, competent hero that can best any demon with ease.

Demon's Souls is a game rich with atmosphere and sheer passion that took risks because it was believed to be a faliure before it even released. Despite the odds, Miyazaki had a vision, and his Little Action-RPG that Could eventually carved a path for one of the most influential franchises in the somewhat short history of gaming.

Sure Dragon God isn't the best boss (even though I personally enjoyed it,) World Tendency is not very well-integrated into the game despite being a cool concept, it's late game is extremely easy when compared to it's successors, and 5-2 would've been 10 times better if you could actually fucking roll in the swamp. But at the end of the day, Demon's Souls is more than just the "Souls Prototype." It's a clear love letter to gaming, a courageous leap forward for the industry that no other Souls game would have to struggle with. It burdened the weight of being the first game of it's kind, and it is a damn fucking shame that it was so overlooked by it's younger cousin up until last year.

(I emulated on RPCS3 at a high resolution with a 60 fps patch and it ran smoothly. One problem was that the audio would often crackle if too many sounds were playing at once, and I couldn't fix it. Vsync is a must for higher resolutions, and one specific GPU setting MUST be on in order for the game to render.)


Somehow makes the base game level design look like amateur hour. Extremely OK Games fires at all cylinders to present a level that not only tells the story of a girl learning to move on from grief, but allows the developers to say goodbye to a project that has helped kick off their own journeys of self-discovery. An excellent send- off for an excellent game, one last mountain to climb.

Finished it

Every frame an MS painting.

Finally got around to Act II, and my opinion still stands that this is a good ass shooter. The new weapons are ridiculously cool, the new enemies remain creative, Gabriel has a surprising amount of character development which I never expected, the Dante's-inferno stylized settings continue to be evocative and creative allegory, the reworks to certain enemies and mechanics are welcome, and the soundtrack just... oh my god. Greed and Wrath are fantastic layers that I don't have many complaints about, and Heresy is still awesome, but I'll get back to what I didn't like about it later.

Considering the game is now a larger, longer product, some small problems have arised.

The joke bosses still stand out like a sore thumb in a game with atmosphere this rich, but that's a pretty small problem.

Boss runbacks are annoying making P-ranking more of a chore. With Minos I guess it's fine considering you still have to fight the hand before the actual boss but Gluttony Gabriel, Greed V2, and the Leviathan could have used shortcuts to make P-rankings less grindy. It's weird that this exists considering the game is paced pretty much flawlessly otherwise.

I await the enemy AI updates that Hakita wants to implement as well, considering some enemies like Schisms and Strays could use a rework. Soldiers having explosion immunity was a small change but added many more layers to the combat and incentives the airshot mechanic of the new rocket launcher.

The only major issue I have is that there really isn't anything fresh involved with Heresy. Considering the dense, rich setting of the level I expected maybe a new demon type? At least Swordmachine returned but for such a cool map it's kinda a shame 6-1 didn't get a new enemy type. I think again the demon/husk enemy types feel very boring and homogenous especially compared to the machine enemies.

This act had a lot of refights and while V2 was a very good rematch, I don't think Gabe was distinct enough from his first fight to take a boss slot, even if it was climactic plot-wise. So I hope that the next act doesn't lean as far into that and the next two layers at the very least get completely new and unique final bosses and a couple new enemies each (because Treachery will probably end up looking similar to Greed and Heresy with a Gabe refight). I really do hope that new ideas continue to come out at a good pace cause that's what really excites me when it comes to this game: seeing what new fucking crazy-ass horseshit New Blood comes up with.


If Act III continues the insane momentum, this can easily be the best game ever created. I've really been scraping the bottom of the barrel for any complaints but that's only because I fucking love what we've been getting here and I want to make sure that it remains near-perfect as the game expands. Just continue with the creativity, keep injecting new ideas, and this already fantastic early access title will be hands down the best game of the year it releases in. Can't wait to see the new secret levels soon as well!

As a high-strung easily stressed Italian man yeah this is accurate to my day to day life

Do not ask me my favorite sprite there's way too many

Also probably the funniest game I've ever played and it gets that achievement without a single line of dialogue and leaning into that fun, slightly edgy 90's cartoon aesthetic

Still like midway through but that Crab level was enough for me to know what to give this

unironically better than any Telltale game

One of the worst bosses is counteracted by two solid levels and one of the best bosses. No I will not tell you which boss is which