Dino Crisis is nearly unparalleled among its contemporaries in terms of atmosphere and tension, but it’s held back a bit by its frustrating map design, low enemy/weapon variety, and uninteresting puzzles. Still, I would lose my mind if Capcom were to remake/reboot this in the RE Engine.

This review contains spoilers

I was pretty excited for this in the lead-up to launch for a few reasons, but I didn't expect to have to force myself to finish this.

On one hand, the combat is very fun and flashy, particularly in the last third of the game, and I had a decent fun when experimenting with different SAS combos. Also, it fully commits to its insane narrative in a way that feels surprisingly confident for a brand new IP.

On the other hand, I'm too tired to write out my complaints in a way that flows naturally, so I'm going to number them.

(1) The narrative completely buckles under the weight of its laughable writing. This game really wants you to like these characters, but you're never given any real reason to. There's a half-baked relationship system, but it consists of cycling through menus to figure out what gifts you haven't given out yet, and the rewards for putting up with this are pretty few and far between.

(2) Whoever made this can't design an interesting world (or a functioning map system) to save their life. This game comes from the "orange Astral Chain" school of design.

(3) The game completely ruins the appeal of its most highly-touted feature--the inclusion of two protagonists with parallel storylines--by the time you get to the last third of the game. After telling you about everything that happens in their story route, the other protagonist's entire platoon joins your party at once, thereby ruining any appeal of a second playthrough to, for example, experiment with the other platoon's SAS powers (unless you really want to play as the other protagonist, for some reason).

(4) Progression is extremely vague and unfulfilling. You earn "brain points" when you level up, but you can only upgrade the protagonist's skills. This is a fine idea on its own, but 90% of the skills are passive abilities that I mostly never noticed in combat. There are a couple of cool skills, such as aerial psychokinesis attacks and concurrent SAS activation, but these are unlocked far too late in the skill tree to make any real impact. There are only about 4 different weapons and 2 costumes to unlock for each character, and there is almost no reason to optimize your party setup because it will not change their strategy or survivability at all.

(5) That's because this game's idea of ramping up its difficulty is "more enemies" instead of different enemies or unique combat scenarios. Like I said before, this game's combat is pretty fun! However, there's almost no incentive to experiment with any of it, because you'll be fighting the same 5 or 6 enemies for the entire game.

(6) The sidequests are very mundane and routine. That usually doesn't bother me that much, but the sidequest rewards are always either healing jellies or bond gifts, both of which can be bought from the shop. You are never rewarded with experience points, additional plug-in slots, or anything useful. There's also no way to track your sidequest objective--you can pin the quest title to the side of the screen, but you have to open a separate menu to view the objective.

(7) Please stop sending text messages to my brain.


Scarlet Nexus is, by all accounts, a remarkably shallow and uninteresting game. If you're going to play a JRPG primarily for its combat, just like... buy Ys IX or something

i actually counted and this is the 32nd mario-adjacent game on the switch. chasing the ball sucks and adding mario characters (my friends) to golf doesn’t make it not golf

in a time when most video games are cinematic, prestigious, and hard to tell apart from one another, insomniac has dared to ask the question "what if there was a minigun that fired black holes"

It Takes Two is a nonstop thrill ride that continues to surprise until the very end. The weaker elements (the writing in some places and sparse instances of frustrating level design) don’t detract from the constant joy of playing through this game with a loved one. This is, bar none, one of the best co-op experiences out there.

damn this game whips ass. but all i’m saying is that metroid fusion doesn’t have maridia

two things:

(1) announcing a localization of the original trials of mana followed immediately by a remake that perfectly adapts the art style of the original is like, top 5 uncharacterisically cool things square has ever done
(2) turns out ffvii remake is just atb bars slapped over the trials of mana battle system

This review contains spoilers

It's difficult to summarize my feelings on this one. I played Earthbound for the first time last year, and it quickly shot itself into my top 5 favorite games of all time. I feel that Earthbound contains a few of the most memorable sequences in games—Moonside, Saturn Valley, Magicant, and the final battle against Giygas, to name a few. Playing Earthbound with the Player's Guide was as close to an otherworldly experience as I've ever had with a video game. As a result, I was always going to go into Mother 3 with unbelievable expectations.

In a lot of ways, Mother 3 meets those expectations. First off, it's extraordinarily well-written, with Itoi's trademark sense of humor (tinged with a measure of dread) shining throughout. It has a very engaging battle system which, when paired with the "rhythm battle" mechanic, makes for some of the most fun I've had playing a JRPG. Finally, the game moves with a sense of urgency—something I appreciated after the occasionally plodding pace of Earthbound. I could go on and on and on about what Mother 3 does well.

All of that said, Mother 3 isn't perfect. Most of the time, I felt that the game involved a few great moments wrapped around a series of McGuffins (more on this later, don't kill me). For example, the game continually asks you to recover the Egg of Light or pull the Needles, but you're given no indication as to why any of this matters until Leder's explanation in the climax, whether through worldbuilding or dialogue. While a lot of the lore is interesting, this "lore dump" approach to storytelling almost always feels lazy and unearned. A large portion of this game involves trudging ahead through unimaginative environments because the game tells you to, but, in my opinion, not because you care.

However, nearly all of my complaints melted away by the time I got to New Pork City. The game is batting on all cylinders there. Rather than giving you a true final boss, Mother 3 uses the final "battle" against Claus as a narrative device that I assume most players, myself included, will never forget. Like I said before, I don't think that Mother 3 is a perfect game, and I still prefer Earthbound in most regards. That said, in light of everything that it does so extraordinarily well, Mother 3 is a game that everyone should play.

pretty good game, but a little too focused on utilizing absolutely every feature of the vita to its detriment

unbelievably cool game

this game has one of the best job systems of all time but i have almost no incentive to play it because i don't care about anything that has happened or any character that i've met

every boss in this game is a train

this might be a kind of harsh rating for an otherwise charming game but the automatic grab that happens when you and player two jump near one another instantly sapped any appreciation i could have had of this game

not done with this one yet, but so far it's a fun and pretty jrpg romp that yuri lowell is carrying on his back

Yakuza: Like a Dragon isn't a perfect game, but I loved absolutely every second of it regardless. For example, the RPG combat isn't perfectly tuned and there are a few late-game boss fights that are mostly damage sponges that don't require actual strategy beyond attacking and healing. The job system is a bit messy, and there are a few moments of laughably wonky animation.

None of these things took away from how much fun I had playing this game and how attached I felt to the characters, the story, and the world. I genuinely didn't want this game to end, and it has opened my eyes to how special Yakuza is. Video games NEVER make me cry, but the one where you can summon several crawfish in battle did. The way this series effortlessly switches from insane and goofy to somber and dark is like nothing else in games to me. Before this, my experience with the series was limited to about 10 hours of Yakuza 0, a game that I quickly wrote off as having bad combat and a bland world to explore.

After finishing Like a Dragon, the appeal of Yakuza is clearer than ever to me, and I can't wait to play the rest of the series. If this game is this good, I can't imagine how good the Kiryu games are.

Update 3/12/2021 the true final millennium tower is absolutely one of the hardest things i've ever done in a jrpg