115 Reviews liked by alagoa


it was pretty hard to think this one over, but ultimately i think 999 is a game about purpose, and finding that said purpose in everything you encounter. what may seem like a fairly straight forward story at its roots, eventually blossoms into an ineffaceable tale that recognizes the joy of the mystery rather than the broader ideological themes a mystery may present. uchikoshi is a guy who likes to explore the inherent mystery within the mystery, which i really enjoy in this scenario. with each character having their own focus and suspicions, it’s extremely easy to lose yourself in these characters and the puzzles that follow suit not just in-game, but behind every bracelet-bearing personality as well. between the carefully thought out suspenseful puzzle rooms, colorful cast of characters, oppressive atmosphere, moody melodies, and the narrator’s almost overbearingly detailed descriptions, i found myself completely hooked. 999, for the most part, is a pretty cut and dry character driven adventure game that i can’t help but love.

i also really like sudoku.

Why the fuck are they talking about ice in a refrigerator?
I hate this game.

game of the year 1995-2022

Termo

2022

como pode um joguinho tão simples fazer tanto por nós todos os dias

I've spent the past few days playing through a whole bunch of shmups. A big problem I have with shmups, as I do in life, is that I can't sit still for two seconds and take things in. Learn the patterns, only move when I need to? That's for dongers mate. Never stop rushing in and just instantly react to everything like a Real Gamer. The jury's out on life but in shmups this has historically led me to pretty poor results.
Ketsui is different. Ketsui wants me to rush in. Ketsui wants me to keep moving. Once the game really got going I felt like the threat of being overwhelmed was constant, that if I stopped fighting against the tide for those two seconds then it would waste no time in washing right over me. In most shmups I find it very easy to weather a storm, get cocky during a quiet moment, and then fly directly into the nearest bullet. That was a lot harder to do here because very rarely did I ever feel like the storm was not still ongoing. And it's good! It's absurdly fun! The game probably isn't quite as relentless as my perception of it in the moment was - there definitely is a clear difficulty curve as you progress - but man, I don't think I've played any others this past week that had me shitting it for such extended periods. Awesome.
The only real complaint I can level against it is that the colour palette and really the overall presentation is a bit bland compared to the other Cave stuff I've played, but I'm having way too much of a good time to really care. In a weird way this ridiculous onslaught has made me appreciate the other games I've played a bit more. Maybe I'll revisit those. Maybe I'll even try to play them properly!
None of this is to imply that I was inherently better at Ketsui than the rest, by the way. Finished it with 17 continues (EDIT: 14 on second run). Absolutely embarrassing. Great game though.

some dude who's favorite game is a JRPG with a 20 minute skit about accidentally groping a girl: "the writing is pretty cringe"

I liked this game the most when I was engaged in the gameplay loop of delivering packages, strengthening connections, and building structures. When you're left in peace, the game can be very enjoyable and relaxing. The cool designs of the creatures and tech elements, and the gloomy landscapes certainly helped to cast a sort of spell.

The bad?
My main issues were with the story, its pacing, the information overload and the dreadful controls.

Self-indulgent sci-fi/philosophical story and incoherent world-building. Cringy dialogue and one insufferable sociopath antagonist (Higgs) who seems to be only motivated by watching the world burn. Laughable "boss fights" almost devoid of any impactful game mechanics or strategy, and simply consist of a rinse-repeat clunky 3rd person shooting. Overly complicated controls, overblown with tiny unnecessary mechanics (half of the things you can do in the game feel like they're just easter eggs).

Apart from the main outdoor locations, most places look sterile and copy-pasted. Even the best designs in the game are recycled throughout the story to the point of becoming trivial. That includes many short cut-scenes, which Kojima forces us to rewatch over and over again as if he worries that we didn't have a good look the first or second time around, destroying any mystical effect they might have had.
Oh, and the expositional dialogue... I don't remember the last time I felt so patronized by a video game repeatedly explaining its objectives, rules and mechanics to you over and over again, and constantly interrupting what you were doing because of it. And at the same time, it keeps playing cryptic games to keep you intrigued about the most important elements of the main story, throwing in a bunch of twists and turns (many of which you could see coming dozens of hours before).
The gist of the story and philosophy of the game is actually interesting but made so obvious by the countless repetition of names and visual clues, and especially by the characters constantly trying to explain it to you so exhaustively, that it becomes dull and tired and leaves nothing for interpretation.

Kojima basically has the same expositional problem as Christopher Nolan in his movies (but arguably even worse).

By the way, for a game so much about walking or driving, it's incredibly frustrating how many times the player can get stuck in broken animations and suffer from the bad physics.

One more thing. As someone who develops user interfaces for a living, I gotta say this game had some of the worst UI/UX I have ever experienced (complete with marquee text!).

Anyway, there's much more I could say about this game, and I tried to love it (there were moments where I did), but after more than 60 hours, I don't know if I hated it more than I loved it.

I understand how many people might find this game cinematic and "deep", considering how superficial AAA video games usually are, but I honestly would have liked this game more if it wasn't constantly trying so hard.

instead of idolizing whatever top player go give some cold hard cash to fizzi instead

This rating is for the PC VERSION only - for some reason every platform it's on has a completely different game.

Couldn't care less about the majority of Harry Potter, and I can't tell if it's nostalgia for playing this when I was 4 or not, but this game genuinely seems to have some really great atmosphere and it's really fun exploring a magic school

I used to make my friends on this game, and it really was a lot of fun to see how they behaved and interacted with each other. It was sometimes too much accurate...

I asked my girlfriend if she'd play an Ace Attorney game other than Investigations and she said "why would I want to play an idiot like Phoenix?"

This game is fine, but that uplifts it to art.

IM ON IT
GET ON IT
THE TROOPS ARE ON FIRE

Habbo

2000

daxter is the kind of guy to get cancelled in 2020 for a tweet he made in 2011