One-Sentence Half Star Explanations
The bottom line for games that I've given the lowest possible score.
22 Games
A very dumb man writes a very dumb story where racism goes both ways and phrenology is proven to be a real science.
Incomprehensible garbage that squanders its celebrity cast while masquerading as a serious story.
Clunky, floaty platforming mixed with shock-value Holocaust imagery makes for something that somehow became a successful multimedia franchise.
First-person shooters sucked for like fifteen straight years because everyone was trying to copy Halo's homework even though it got all the answers wrong.
The brave heroes of the resistance, who shove starving children to the ground and throw their squadmates to the wolves for the unforgivable crime of being visibly Asian.
An abject failure that's emblematic of Nintendo's backwards business policies in the early-2010s.
The nail in the coffin of a series that was ripped away from its rightful developers.
Single-handedly responsible for spurring indie developers to release purposefully-broken piles while still charging money for them.
If you asked Daniel Mullins to make a game where Satan wasn't secretly haunting the computer the entire time, it would kill him.
Please stop letting this man make games.
Boring gameplay, bad business practices, and constant developer transphobia make this an easy skip.
A narrative game that makes the bold choice to not have a story or an ending.
A known bug that bricks the save files of all copies of the game remains completely unpatched to this day.
A game that tries and fails to distract you from the shit gameplay with worse comedy.
Posting isn't praxis, and people new to leftism need to get over the notion that it is in less embarrassing ways than this.
The one where the goblins start practicing blood libel.
You ever see something that was made purely because some suit thought it would earn them a promotion?
EA plucks the remaining flesh from Visceral's bones, leaving nothing behind but an empty carcass.
A pseudo-sequel that manages to have both less and worse content than what came before it.
The only purpose this game serves is to be held up as a shield by thoughtless consumers wishing to defend their latest terrible products with the hope that they'll be made better later.
Rockstar's anti-cheat required to run the game revoked write privileges on my entire games folder and broke several programs, making this the first piece of malware on the list.
Finally, the worst fucking thing I've ever seen in my entire life.
fweged
1 year ago