EffOff
2009
I love to think about playing Origins and I love to have played Origins, but actually playing Origins? It's rough. It's aged both well and very poorly. 10/10 would recommend.
2011
I love you ugly stepsister of the Dragon Age franchise, despite your bad everything and poorly-aged centrist narratives <3
This game is so beautiful but so, so stupid. Absolute dumpster fire. I hate it here. I love it here. I love running around with my little guys in the dark dank caves of Thedas and then one of them opens their mouth to say something inflammatory and I suddenly remember this game was written by a bunch of gibbons.
2010
Something something ludonarrative consistency in the design of the Suicide Mission something something finally getting to smash Garrus.
2012
So so so so so so so so good. The writing, the gameplay, sometimes even the music. And then the ending. Rip in pepperoni lol. At least I got to smash Garrus again.
Honestly, I got this game for like 50% off a while after it was out, and it wasn't, like, a bad game. It was a bad BioWare game, though. I feel like calling it "Mass Effect: Inquisition" is a pretty good description of what it is. Fun gameplay, pretty graphics (well, aside from the ... faces and animation), but the writing is just really bland and surface-level and often cringey. Doesn't really live up to the Mass Effect name, which is why people hated it so much. Would've been fine on its own, I suspect.
I'm unfortunatley BioWare's bitch so I bought this full price the day it came out. Honestly, the changes are so miniscule that if you have the trilogy on PC with a few mods, you probably don't need this upgrade. Still, it's the Mass Effect trilogy in one neat, slightly updated package, and the overhauls to ME1 are really good, as well. I think it's worth getting, espeically now when it won't be quite as pricey.
Is it a good game? Nah. Did I play it as a kid and learn the wonders of modding because of it? Yeah. Is it worth releasing forty billion times? Nah. Will I get any of the new editions? Nah. Is it worth giving a shot just because of how much of a meme it is nowadays? Yes. I love you Todd, my prince of lies, and your horrible misshapen child.
2015
"Oh, that's right, I forgot I was looking for my son!"
-- Griffin McElroy, Monster Factory: Fallout 4 - Episode 2
-- Griffin McElroy, Monster Factory: Fallout 4 - Episode 2
2016
Ayn Rand's wet dream ahahahahaha
No but forreal this game is iconic and well-loved for a reason. Was lucky enough to play it without being spoiled first (initial release, not the remaster). The twist blew my dick right off, and not because it was surprising or came out of nowhere. It actually had something to say that it was building up to throughout, and the medium helped the message (i.e. something something the illusion of choice in an interactive medium something something). A must-play IMO.
No but forreal this game is iconic and well-loved for a reason. Was lucky enough to play it without being spoiled first (initial release, not the remaster). The twist blew my dick right off, and not because it was surprising or came out of nowhere. It actually had something to say that it was building up to throughout, and the medium helped the message (i.e. something something the illusion of choice in an interactive medium something something). A must-play IMO.
Not quite as punchy as the first story-wise, but has a lot of improvements over the first game and is still a very good entry in the franchise that expands upon the world and lore of the first game ... Isn't that wild for a sequel to do hahaha :)
2013
YOU CAN'T BOTH-SIDES SLAVERY, KEN.
I swear the gaming media was seduced by the pretty skyboxes back when this came out and we were all collectively tricked into thinking this was good because of the graphics and the "twist" at the end and the "thoughtful" commentary on racism. Ugh.
Pretty city in sky though, and I like the soundtrack, so here's your participation trophy you absolute piece of garbage.
I swear the gaming media was seduced by the pretty skyboxes back when this came out and we were all collectively tricked into thinking this was good because of the graphics and the "twist" at the end and the "thoughtful" commentary on racism. Ugh.
Pretty city in sky though, and I like the soundtrack, so here's your participation trophy you absolute piece of garbage.
2012
Sorry I have no words to describe how good this is. Probably one of the first "proper" games I got, so I'm biased, but oh my god. The atmosphere, the art direction, the music, the worldbuilding, the gameplay? Games are art and I can prove it.
Story is pretty meh but everything else makes up for it. Probably one of the most influential pieces of media I've consumed that still inspires my own creations to this day.
I love you Dishonored kisses it on the mouth
Story is pretty meh but everything else makes up for it. Probably one of the most influential pieces of media I've consumed that still inspires my own creations to this day.
I love you Dishonored kisses it on the mouth
2016
This review contains spoilers
Yeah it was wonky on release but I got it on the PS4 so I didn't notice, sorry.
I loved playing as Emily and I loved her powerset. I think Karnaca was a really cool setting and the game itself was gorgeous, a total upgrade over the first game while still feeling accurate to the world and unique to the franchise. A couple of the levels (especially A Crack in the Slab) were really imaginative and just viscerally satisfying to master and figure out. Honestly, it was a pretty good sequel overall.
My main gripe is the story. Dishonored 1 had a pretty bare-bones plot that was just an excuse to get Corvo going. Here, the protagonists are voiced and the story becomes a larger presence in the game, and you can really tell that the writers just can't quite back up their worldbuilding and atmosphere with a good story, at least not with Emily or Corvo at the helm. They're both voiced this time and the actors do a decent enough job, but Emily's story in particular just fell really short for me. You're supposed to believe that low chaos Emily learned how privileged she is and that she needs to do better, but we're just ... told this at the end of the game. Like, we don't see her evolve and realize the errors of her ways, the privilege of her position as Empress, how she's hurt her people by neglecting her duties. She just decides "oh well I'll do better now," but nothing really changes.
It just makes her seem really unlikable and like the main villain is lowkey correct? Which wouldn't be a bad thing, if it was intentional on the writers' part, but I don't think it was. It just came off as really underbaked and trite.
Poor Corvo just gets a rehash of his plot in DH1, characters even point out that it's the same dang conflict. I think the old man was just included to satisfy the gamer bros who can't play as a woman lest their masculinity shatters into a thousand wet pieces.
So this game was fun and I would've liked it more if the story was better, or if they let Emily and Corvo shut up this time, too, so I could at least imagine better writing for them, cuz that worked in DH1.
I loved playing as Emily and I loved her powerset. I think Karnaca was a really cool setting and the game itself was gorgeous, a total upgrade over the first game while still feeling accurate to the world and unique to the franchise. A couple of the levels (especially A Crack in the Slab) were really imaginative and just viscerally satisfying to master and figure out. Honestly, it was a pretty good sequel overall.
My main gripe is the story. Dishonored 1 had a pretty bare-bones plot that was just an excuse to get Corvo going. Here, the protagonists are voiced and the story becomes a larger presence in the game, and you can really tell that the writers just can't quite back up their worldbuilding and atmosphere with a good story, at least not with Emily or Corvo at the helm. They're both voiced this time and the actors do a decent enough job, but Emily's story in particular just fell really short for me. You're supposed to believe that low chaos Emily learned how privileged she is and that she needs to do better, but we're just ... told this at the end of the game. Like, we don't see her evolve and realize the errors of her ways, the privilege of her position as Empress, how she's hurt her people by neglecting her duties. She just decides "oh well I'll do better now," but nothing really changes.
It just makes her seem really unlikable and like the main villain is lowkey correct? Which wouldn't be a bad thing, if it was intentional on the writers' part, but I don't think it was. It just came off as really underbaked and trite.
Poor Corvo just gets a rehash of his plot in DH1, characters even point out that it's the same dang conflict. I think the old man was just included to satisfy the gamer bros who can't play as a woman lest their masculinity shatters into a thousand wet pieces.
So this game was fun and I would've liked it more if the story was better, or if they let Emily and Corvo shut up this time, too, so I could at least imagine better writing for them, cuz that worked in DH1.
Pros: Love Billie, she's got personality where Emily lacked one, and she's the perfect protagonist to end this journey on, with just enough grit to fit in the world but also a lot of heart that makes her likable. Limited but unique power set makes the game more challenging but more engaging for a stealth player like me. Interesting ideas and new areas that are fun to explore, even if none are quite as creative as the ones in DH2. More lore and more Outsider stuff, I love that little freak.
Cons: Just completely wasted my mans Daud. He deserved better than to croak on a boat off-screen. Would've still liked a chaos meter, even if it "doesn't make sense," it just feels like something's missing without it. The main plot and "good" ending have a very distinct whiff of fanfic that makes me believe the rumor that a Corvosider shipper helped write it. It just felt kinda fanservice-y.
Overall, more of Dishonored, and I love Dishonored, even when you're not really very Dishonored anymore.
Cons: Just completely wasted my mans Daud. He deserved better than to croak on a boat off-screen. Would've still liked a chaos meter, even if it "doesn't make sense," it just feels like something's missing without it. The main plot and "good" ending have a very distinct whiff of fanfic that makes me believe the rumor that a Corvosider shipper helped write it. It just felt kinda fanservice-y.
Overall, more of Dishonored, and I love Dishonored, even when you're not really very Dishonored anymore.