GrooviestPine
2017
Secret World 1.0 was so good, this weird and ambitious attempt to make an MMORPG with quest structure that was closely tied into its worldbuilding and didn't feel like just doing fetch quests and mindlessly checking off boxes. It wasn't entirely successful but it was still one of the coolest things I've played. And I understand the reasoning behind Funcom's decision to relaunch it, but really all they did was take the parts of the game that were already not good and somehow made them bad enough that they made the game no longer fun to play. And since the relaunch didn't spark the renewed interest they apparently wanted, Funcom is so transparently uninterested in salvaging what they have that they don't even bother to do server maintenance anymore, so the game's borderline unplayable now. As I write this there are 80 people online. What a depressing end to such a bold, interesting experiment. Fuck you Funcom.
2007
The first great Final Fantasy, and coincidentally the first one I ever played, way back in 1997. They really nail just about everything here; the rotating cast of characters means you never lock into a particular playstyle for too long, and the series' storytelling finally hits its stride. The cast isn't drawn with the complexity given to later entries, but they're colorful enough that they're fun to be around. Just a real good meat-and-potatoes JRPG.
This is my first time playing the DS version, and it's a terrific remake; while I am a bit annoyed at how oddly arcane the augment system is (regarding what will trigger a character to drop one or not, I mean), it's a super interesting and fun way to customize your party without breaking the game's balance. Only real issue is the final dungeon, which was always a brutal slog but is worse in this version.
This is my first time playing the DS version, and it's a terrific remake; while I am a bit annoyed at how oddly arcane the augment system is (regarding what will trigger a character to drop one or not, I mean), it's a super interesting and fun way to customize your party without breaking the game's balance. Only real issue is the final dungeon, which was always a brutal slog but is worse in this version.
Combat's complete dogshit and there's a weird lack of monster variety but man this is a great Chill Out And Have a Good Time Wandering Around game.
The dialogue in this game sounds like it was machine-translated from English into an eastern European language and then machine-translated back to English.
2022
My first Splatoon. I had basically the same experience with this game that I've had with every multiplayer shooter, which is that it's great when I am winning and a massive piece of shit when I'm not. Also I got stuck on only the second boss in the single player mode but I don't care enough to try to beat it.
2006
The first game in the series with truly great music, and that's about the only superlative thing I can say about it. The job system is fun but not very well thought-out (allowing the player to switch jobs at any time but punishing them for doing so is nonsensical, not to mention how broken job level grinding is); the game as a whole has a very bizarre difficulty curve where it starts brutal, becomes easy around the halfway point, then becomes brutal again in the final dungeons. Making each party member a defined character in the 3D remake is borderline pointless, because nobody has much of a personality. Battles playing out in 3D with full animation slows down the pace a lot, which made the points where I had to grind even more tedious than usual.
I do have to say I begrudgingly respect the remake for not doing much to soften the final gauntlet though. It's maybe the most hatefully designed thing in the series, and something that really makes FF3 stand out, for better or worse.
I do have to say I begrudgingly respect the remake for not doing much to soften the final gauntlet though. It's maybe the most hatefully designed thing in the series, and something that really makes FF3 stand out, for better or worse.
Ending's a bit of a mess, but hot damn. Taken together with the first Great Ace Attorney (since they really are kind of one game split in two) this really feels like the capstone of this series.
2018
the best Tetris game
This review contains spoilers
The ending gets a bit goofy, and the MSQ over the final map is a little too narratively schematic to have the emotional impact it's trying so hard to nail, but overall an extremely good conclusion to the Hydaelyn arc. Very much looking forward to the future of this game without being subjected to yet more bullshit with the Ascians and the Garlean Empire.
2022
This review contains spoilers
A lot of fun in the moment, but it becomes clear that it really hasn't fixed any of Until Dawn's issues (in fact the only improvement I noticed was that the cast was way more likable), and there's also a lingering sense that the game as a whole is a bit unfinished. Pop-in and bizarre continuity issues abound, but the game's final third or so feels extremely undercooked narratively--not just in the piddling anticlimax I got in my playthrough, but in the way that (in a playthrough where you're trying to save everyone, at least) it just doesn't know what to do with certain characters after a point. One protagonist turned into a werewolf in a way that implied it would have an impact on things to come, but I literally never saw them again until the end credits. Another got lost in the woods on their way to do something--again, simply never saw them again after this.
I still like the game quite a bit, enough that I'll definitely be doing more playthroughs. But it's a big disappointment nonetheless, one that obviously needed more time in the oven.
(Also, I don't care about this that much, but giving this game essentially the same "kids trapped in the woods with monsters and mountain men who may or may not be as threatening as they appear" setup as Until Dawn and on top of that designing the "werewolves" to look almost exactly like the wendigos from UD? Come on.)
I still like the game quite a bit, enough that I'll definitely be doing more playthroughs. But it's a big disappointment nonetheless, one that obviously needed more time in the oven.
(Also, I don't care about this that much, but giving this game essentially the same "kids trapped in the woods with monsters and mountain men who may or may not be as threatening as they appear" setup as Until Dawn and on top of that designing the "werewolves" to look almost exactly like the wendigos from UD? Come on.)
Took a few hours to get on its wavelength, but once I did I had a surprisingly decent time. I don't think I would call its leveling system good--too much of its rules are pointlessly arcane and counterintuitive--but it is interesting, and maybe sometimes I prefer interesting to good. And the near-constant barrage of stats going up in battle is real satisfying in that Skinner box way. From what I hear this is a system that's carried over and refined in the SaGa series, so maybe it's time for me to finally give that a try.
Also dug how ambitious it is in the way it tells its story--basic plot's a naked, halfassed Star Wars ripoff, but I was impressed by the way the world state changes as you progress through the game, something I don't think other NES RPGs were doing at the time. Also liked the rotating cast (even if nobody has much of a personality to speak of), and the game's surprising willingness to kill people off. It's easy to see why this is nobody's favorite Final Fantasy, but, I dunno. There's something here.
Also dug how ambitious it is in the way it tells its story--basic plot's a naked, halfassed Star Wars ripoff, but I was impressed by the way the world state changes as you progress through the game, something I don't think other NES RPGs were doing at the time. Also liked the rotating cast (even if nobody has much of a personality to speak of), and the game's surprising willingness to kill people off. It's easy to see why this is nobody's favorite Final Fantasy, but, I dunno. There's something here.
One of the best narratives I've ever experienced in a video game. The first and last acts of 5.0 are just straight-up jaw-droppingly brilliant, and I can't help but feel like the opening wouldn't have had quite as much of an impact on me were it not for Stormblood's MSQ sucking so bad, so uh...thanks, Stormblood?
In any event--amazing story, great worldbuilding, great music, great raids, the game's second-best story arc in the Sorrow of Werlyt questline, and the best villain in the series' history. What a turnaround. Bring it home, Endwalker.
In any event--amazing story, great worldbuilding, great music, great raids, the game's second-best story arc in the Sorrow of Werlyt questline, and the best villain in the series' history. What a turnaround. Bring it home, Endwalker.
2006
just finished the christmas stage...what the fuck
Nothing in here that wouldn't be improved on in future games in the genre but sometimes it's nice to just chill out to an RPG this simple.
2022
Felt overly familiar at the outset--an austere, borderline-minimalist exploratory indie platformer/adventure game of the sort that vacuums up critical acclaim and awards. Thankfully that's not actually the case; there's much more depth to its world than I expected, and it's often refreshingly irreverent about it too. It has personality and heart, which can go a very long way for me. The matching of this environment and these characters with a cute, realistically rendered cat is more inspired than I could have hoped for.
My roommate's cat Ellie is barely smart enough to function on a basic level, so I tried to show her the game to shame her into being less of a dipshit but she didn't even notice. Do better Ellie
My roommate's cat Ellie is barely smart enough to function on a basic level, so I tried to show her the game to shame her into being less of a dipshit but she didn't even notice. Do better Ellie