Played october 31st

umm... weird. my dirty dishes and flith rags are stinking more than usual. i do believe the brick of self defense will not come in handy here... the case of the killer with mental illness has yet to come to a close.

Played feb 29th 2024

Carol was put through so much. Shot at with fireworks and hit by a car. Reduced to a life of brain cancer. But she did what others couldnt do, put that bastard Bill behind bars. She will never see her precious bird again, but shes flying high. Sue. Don. Ron. Her brother, potentially named Gary. You dont ever win the game once youre in it. But you can still... make... things... right.

and i raaaaan. I ran so far ☆awaaay☆ i just RAAAAN.... i couldnt get awaaaaay. couldnt get away..... i walk along da aveneue... never thought id meet a girl like youuuuUu meet a girl like yoaauu... red ahyhrhi and shjsh eyes... the kind of eyes that hyp.no.tize me thruuuu. Hypnotize me throughhhh and I Raaannn i ran so far awayyyy i just raaaan i ran all night and adaaay

Played august 30th:
Ph my god the cooking was talking and there was a DUCK?!?!? AUUGH?? 4 SPIRITS DID YOU FIND EVERYTHING?????

These two are gonna be a real hoot

Played April 18th:

Might i speak to the manager about the failure prostitute i just witnessed who could only scissor and nothing more. Yes, i know she cant afford mouth animations, but surely she can work something out.

I believe it will come out

May 2024

"Dont judge a book by their cover" or so they say. sometimes this saying is right. sometimes the cover is so loud thag we drown out all other thoughts. i didnt expect her to do what she did. But she did it anyways despite the haters. she won where her father lost. shes here and he is not. she killed bigfoot and gave me.the courauge to go after a 'foot of my own. my back hurts. My eyes hurt

Played feb 1st

Please reach level 5 in Boobs and Being Licked to access this review

Feb 1st

The long lasted emotional struggle between wanting to play monkey ball, and masturbate. finally solved. Thanks man.

Switch store page is scary

Halfway through thid game someone started screaming outside my apartment and threatening to call the cops. But i was dressing up a scary woman. Too busy for such things. Vaginas like open wounds, must be the neko secret?

Dec 11th

wet paper towrl.

Feb 10th 2024

skip the fart scene?

May 31st 2024

Boy. Where do i begin. The constant references to alesas ass. The 15 second unskippable ass dance after every boss. The fact that there are bosses to begin with. Ass not even being called ass but constantly referred to as cake. Jokes about ass that dont even make any sense (gepetto? More like ge-ass to!). The constant, sad self references, desperately backing off the 'haters' for thinking youre weird for having your protagonist look like that. That it was funny before because it was serious but now it completely doesnt give a shit and is seriously perving over her fucking ass like its the most hilarious thing ever. Youtuber references. The ending. Why are there bosses. I cant even explain how bad the jokes are. Theyre not even jokes its just inserting the word ass or cake into words. Immature, self assassinating, sad.

Having an issue finding the rom for this game. Hilda has found "bubble bath babes" instead.

Shelved on March 17th
Hilda played it for 2 hours then gave it a lower score than fucking floigan bros what the fuck.

Played september 11th 2001

asshole game

What the fuck is this

Played may 24th:

Oouuuuuuuhh oouuuhhhhh nooooooo.... noooooooooo.....

Played august 11th:

IM GOING TO GET YOU mexican RYAN

Played April 23rd:

large starberries.

Dec 6th

ok bye martha.

Jan 1st 2024

Oh my god. I almoast lego'd all over the floor. oh my god

Played April 4th:
This game was maybe 12 minutes long. There was a dinosaur that was defied by the valorant hippo. I was playing octopath, oops

Played may 30th:

I fell asleep and it was such a good sleep.
Didnt even make it to the breeding grounds however, where the game really goes to die..... gollum, gollum....

Played on April 18th:

Booooooooooooooooooooo

April 5 2024

boobi my assistant. I got a coin.

Jan 15th 2024

Artorias: The abyss is consuming me. i can hardly put up a fight anymore, I can feel its way clawing through my body... I can only hope for a swift end.

Debt Collector LuLu Bear: girl! You better put up a fight or i will sell you to goblins! Now do a sexy 13,000 dollar dance.

I wanted her to play Babe ps2.

Played 4/20:
Do you see that? Yeah.... thats right. You know

Played october 20th

i beamed it out of there. i got a super mighty bean. i dont wamt it.

Played october 20th

my dear brother jeff you were in a hospital. Many laughs at your expense, tearfully tearing eyes away from boobs to finish your game. the struggles i had trying to make hilda finish this. the desperate search for distraction. jajaja

An amendment:
Finally we can understand the story of Jeffrey dahmer the killer. His mommy go crazy and is no importance. Go away. Less boobs this time but more bad words and a slur

Bubba

Played April 12th:

no fucking way

Jan 1st 2024

sees magnifying glass on the floor
oh! its magifying glass breasts giggle this is so good chat we only need 2 more! turns around
scary girl
kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Aaaaaaa
Aaaaa
Aaaaaa
Aaaa
Aa
Aa
A

Teaching hilda what silly means with silly bandz

Played may 4th:
Was not expecting an angry birds clone. They didnt even look like silly bandz...

Played april 29th:
this pig is so lonely and everyone hates her and wont tell her that shes going to die. RAT?

"Metroidvania for girls"

Dec 12

thaat was not for girls. I dont know who we were protecting. It obviously wasnt me.

Dec 25th

This isnt funny any longer
sad, sad tears of a clown.
whirlpool of
sadness
hildas, deflated
defeated
emptied of joy
button puzzle

Played august 10th:

Ohh opibaby bird opila bird delightfult bird so wide eyed and beautiful how could theu have done this to you you were jjst a baby a small.little baby...

CHOO CHOO CARL.

Played in march or something

Who cares.

May 30th 2023

Mr bob is hijacking the yuri car noo

At first i thought these were satirical and made by a woman cause the way these characters look are almost never referenced. And its the same in this game. But boy. You sure let us down, partner. I should of known with the yuri references.

Played may 7th:

My life is now complete! Hilda played the coolest game ever! Dave should be nicer to Alivin (: and she earned 2 gold medals!!!!!chiptastic!!!

Played dec 10th

uh... the grenade exploded and... uh...myth busted! soo... time to... buy stuff from my own warehouse... maybe.... i think.....where am i..

Played october 31st

rhe worst day of my life, i saw her. An angel in human* form. Squirting her gun at all my foes. And then i saw another one. Doing the same thing, with a different gun. And oh... could she ever jump. was i not impressed...


¹she looked bad.

Played April 25th:
I don't know why I keep putting these here. They're not even funny.

Played august 11th:

My sweet female tiger i will kill 7 eagles and 13 buffalo and 100 wolves and a pig for you

May 14th 2023

BOOBS

DILDO

POUND

NIPPLES

<- <- -> <--

... youve unlocked......

FEMALE !!!! Haaaahh haaaaaahhhh hah hah aaahhhhhh (awooga.)

Hilda wanted this on the list, not me

Player april 29th:
Clipped out of bounds, failed milk pick up. Game is nothing

Played may 6th;
Best bday gift ive ever recieved

Dec 10th

RAVEN! INCOMING BOMB! TAKE COVER, TRENCHES! HUT TWO HUT TWO. WE WILL WIN THIS WAR WHATEVER IT TAKES

Jan 12th 2024

This game LIED on its steam store page and it isnt even close to being as cool as honey select or my FAVORITE GAME Live Stream One AND Two and it was STUPID and I hated it and it was really, really, very, bad. You ARE responsible. Dont even lie to me

Played july 12th:

There were so many tears. So much sadness. Visceral embarassment to the hands of Pig. But there could only be one to win the Slop Bucket Challenge. One who slopped it better than anyone ever could. And that person was, of course... Player.

"Jesse we have to cook" - hilda (white)

Played March 27th: Gordon was a very. Proud. Man.

Played April 12:

If you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you

Tonyzaret video

Played 26th feb 2024

So... yeah. My furry girlfriend turned out to be an actually werewolf, but before we could get to first base this nerd in my class brought out a shotgun and threatened to shoot up the school! And i was like uhmmmm so that just happened??? I mean, who brings a SHOTGUN to a school shooting. Thats cringier than the time my teacher interrupted class to t pose! Anyways, that basically sums up my #awkwardsauce life

Played may 21st:

That boy got lost in the woods and his dad did not care. Wife makes dinner and BECOMES dinner! Shit eating kid gets served, what a fail.... jpg of old woman.... jpg of troll.....

Play April 23rd:
Push barrel up hill for more information about our scary baddie boobie game

Played April 22nd:

It's thr killar!!! Aaaa!!!!!! Loop the killar.... get on gens..m. sprint burst .. . .

Played april 29th:

Game was suprisingly cute but i beaned it out of there quick

Squirts older sister

Play july 18th:

Uh, kind of a sleepy type spray. Definitely a vomit and spit type spray. A bit slime too. Gdq submission soon.

Dec 7th

Interesting concept. I am excited to scream or laugh more in full release

Played august 5th:
I do not believe this game opens with a 2 hour cutscene about a very threatening man named jokester54.

Played on April 17th:

Sex? Yes please!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Played again April 21st:
I no longer associate with Mr. Powers

Played september 1st:
Holy fucign shit dhe .jumped that .cat off so many buildings

You will never be finfin (on planet teo)

Dec 2nd

WHAT WAS THE EXPERIMENT

Played may 21st:
I thought this might be similar to ao oni but it wasnt


I was playing dinkum.... my pleep grew up into a big pleep. yayaayayay

Played April 4th: you move very slow and there's so many invisible walls.

Played April 23:

I am so glad to play games with strong and courageous women in them

Played june 4th:

I go to the diner to get my diner popcorn and it is so fucking dark that i just wander around for 5 minutes and then the game ends.

Discovered through a game called "novastella Island", which was apparently supposed to be an adult game that got changed into a farming sim (very obvious).

played at some point

I wasnt texting the whole time i remember everything like uhhmm ms naoki and the boobs and the mirrors and the dramaa. And that lady. And the curse. And the puzzle.

December 20th

omg shes about to be crushed by that falling tv! but my clothes got dirrty.. life is so hard and im so yucky.... jesus fucking christ

Dec 22nd

She masturbated her ankles. this god damn clutz. cant do anything right.

Played at a point in january 2024

okay guys. so, you might think my itchio game is normal, but actually when you walk outside youll notice something wacky. Thats right, SHOES. on the ground! Ok, so thats crazy. But it wasnt crazy enough. My house? Its freaky. I go in there, and theres blood on the walls and shit! It wasnt there before oooo. But i'll go further. Freaky fucking jpg! Now youre really freaked. I cant stop myself guys.... SLAVERY. oh yeah, now thats scary.

Played august 7th:
5 second game. did not survive.

Played may 30th:
Sopranos knowledge 0 but was expecting worse. Controls like Yakuza ripping GTA's eyes out. but theres massive chest in this game WITH. NIPPLE. oh my god! Squirt.

YOU WILL finish ms lemons so help me god....

March 18th replayed, ms lemons is filth

Played April 23:

slender? Woman slender? female slender sauntering sexily down the hallway as I collect my books? My sexy books?

Played august 5th:
Erhm... THIS isnt the right medicine. I feel a bit gluey. A bit shoey.

Played April 23:

Sadly this was not as entertaining as the other games made by Kona5... we kept getting lost.

Played March 20th
A disappointment through and through though this would inevitably lead to the Great French Movie disaster

♡♡MY PXSSY IN BIO♡♡

Played september 21st

Sprints at 80 miles per hour and slaps you in the face face with my unbearably huge fucking knockers. Only one aerola.