Wily being voiced without a German accent just feels wrong

Why would I ever have sex when there's no way it can be even half as good as this game

Convinced that the development process of this game as the writers spending most of their time making sure that one trial goes as hard as physically possible and then realizing "Oh yeah, we need three more of these"

What a nice young man. I wonder if he knows what he's fighting for.

Tunnel Rhino's stage can go fuck itself

The Yiik rip-off somehow got a sequel

I love Castlevania so much I wish dying was real

Maybe one day, I'll actually beat that piece of shit final boss

There's a level where you can invade a country for oil.
Finally, a game made for Americans like me.

Megaman 5 devs intricately crafting the most mid game ever made

I now have to live the rest of my life with the knowledge that I died to Toad Man a nonzero amount of times

Fun combat but still a shameless copy of the cinematic masterpiece Yiik: A Postmodern RPG

Fuck you American industrialist Elisha Otis. You should have been doing whatever 19th century people did for fun instead of inventing the first safety elevator and causing the chain of events that would lead to this game's map design existing.

Blatant ripoff of Yiik

The strongest whip Belmont fan can't beat the weakest Eric Lecarde fan