NightmareModeGo
BACKER
Nah man. They start great and then shit the bed so quickly. I enjoy helping folk who've been in accidents or come down with an illness, and when you suddenly have Medical Terrorism and a weaponised virus called GUILT showing up, I thought I was in for a good time.
What I was actually in for was ridiculous difficulty spikes that didnae seem to account for the fiddly nature of a DS game requiring a lot of pixel precision, and doing more out loud swearing at a game than I ever have in my whole life.
Those fuckin' triangles. Away ye go.
What I was actually in for was ridiculous difficulty spikes that didnae seem to account for the fiddly nature of a DS game requiring a lot of pixel precision, and doing more out loud swearing at a game than I ever have in my whole life.
Those fuckin' triangles. Away ye go.
2019
Unbelievably good flow and momentum on display here. A proper game, ye know? Sometimes you just need a game.
It feels incredible putting headphones on and getting lost in the blood and dynamic jazz. The crash of cymbals as these strong primate arms fire a dude into the wall at 200mph without even slowing my trot. Drums steadily following the rhythm of knuckles and feet pounding the ground as I approach the next victim. Body after body collides with concrete and glass, the volume increasing all the time.
I am the ape, and I want out.
It feels incredible putting headphones on and getting lost in the blood and dynamic jazz. The crash of cymbals as these strong primate arms fire a dude into the wall at 200mph without even slowing my trot. Drums steadily following the rhythm of knuckles and feet pounding the ground as I approach the next victim. Body after body collides with concrete and glass, the volume increasing all the time.
I am the ape, and I want out.
Like strapping joy onto your face. This is what VR is all about.
There's been a lot of "Sony's Mario" chat thrown around about this, and it's honestly hard to argue with that. But I've not had this kinda fun with a Mario game in some time. There's a real proper feeling of immersion. I kept pointing at stuff expecting my hand to come into view. Instinctually going to hold my breath as water rose up past my chin. It sounds ridiculous, but you truly get lost in there.
Just you and yer wee pal, exploring worlds, rescuing lost bots, punching enemies, headbutting footballs back at them. Using shuriken to solve puzzles, smashing a giant robot ape's teeth to bits. It's gold, and the kinda thing that feels like proof of what VR can be beyond the gimmick most folk assume.
There's been a lot of "Sony's Mario" chat thrown around about this, and it's honestly hard to argue with that. But I've not had this kinda fun with a Mario game in some time. There's a real proper feeling of immersion. I kept pointing at stuff expecting my hand to come into view. Instinctually going to hold my breath as water rose up past my chin. It sounds ridiculous, but you truly get lost in there.
Just you and yer wee pal, exploring worlds, rescuing lost bots, punching enemies, headbutting footballs back at them. Using shuriken to solve puzzles, smashing a giant robot ape's teeth to bits. It's gold, and the kinda thing that feels like proof of what VR can be beyond the gimmick most folk assume.
I wonder how the other scientists feel about Rosenberg having a higher fidelity head than them.
2022
A lot of you have never played Gungrave (or watched the brilliant anime) and it shows.
The Gunslinger of Resurrection is back! In my reviews for the VR Gungrave games I mentioned how it felt like Iggymob understood Gungrave but were kinda tied to the VR thing stopping them getting all the way there. This is them getting there. Whether on purpose (of course not) or simply from being a small studio who prior to getting the GG license had only made a terrible WW2 dogfighting game, they've nailed what GG is about. It's about shooting a million dudes. It's about swinging the coffin chained to your arms. It's about transforming said coffin into wild weapons to dish out massive destruction. It's about wondering whether anyone involed in the development has ever heard the word "balance". The PS2 lives on.
But to be serious for a moment, I get why folk hate this. I even get why fans of the original hate it. There's clearly going to be expectations when old games you like in spite of themselves get modern sequels. You hope for the same feeling but in a prettier package. Polished and dolled up. Controls tightened, an all round smoothed out experience. But that isn't to be found here, and folk are right to be disappointed.
Luckily I tempered my expectations heavily and got just the kinda shit I was after. Dodgy voice acting, even dodgier cutscenes. Poor dialogue and grammar. Bunji turning up again because he's so fuckin' cool, new characters that get zero introduction but are supposed to be cared about. It's a mess, and a beautiful one at that. I think I care about Gungrave more than most folk because a single line in this thing put tears in my eyes.
KICK THEIR ASS
The Gunslinger of Resurrection is back! In my reviews for the VR Gungrave games I mentioned how it felt like Iggymob understood Gungrave but were kinda tied to the VR thing stopping them getting all the way there. This is them getting there. Whether on purpose (of course not) or simply from being a small studio who prior to getting the GG license had only made a terrible WW2 dogfighting game, they've nailed what GG is about. It's about shooting a million dudes. It's about swinging the coffin chained to your arms. It's about transforming said coffin into wild weapons to dish out massive destruction. It's about wondering whether anyone involed in the development has ever heard the word "balance". The PS2 lives on.
But to be serious for a moment, I get why folk hate this. I even get why fans of the original hate it. There's clearly going to be expectations when old games you like in spite of themselves get modern sequels. You hope for the same feeling but in a prettier package. Polished and dolled up. Controls tightened, an all round smoothed out experience. But that isn't to be found here, and folk are right to be disappointed.
Luckily I tempered my expectations heavily and got just the kinda shit I was after. Dodgy voice acting, even dodgier cutscenes. Poor dialogue and grammar. Bunji turning up again because he's so fuckin' cool, new characters that get zero introduction but are supposed to be cared about. It's a mess, and a beautiful one at that. I think I care about Gungrave more than most folk because a single line in this thing put tears in my eyes.
KICK THEIR ASS
1992
Another game I'd never heard anyone mention, but saw sudden excitement when I said I would be streaming it. Screenshots had me thinking this was a point and click, but what a surprise to find out it's a classic survival horror. Just good campy fun with some brilliant over the top voice work.
Edward Carnby wears a bowtie and kicks like a fucking train.
Edward Carnby wears a bowtie and kicks like a fucking train.
2021
This review contains spoilers
It took 10 hours for this game to properly click for me and make sense, and I think it was purely because the menus are a fucking mess like I haven't seen in a while.
I was getting some kind of sensory overload every time I had to browse them. It somehow looks so much more complicated than it actually is, and I'll never understand how this setup wasn't just the first prototype for a menu system. Also, still with the controller cursor for navigation? Come on.
The game is pretty fun when the loop (shut up) starts making sense, but the premise itself kinda reveals the whole thing to be much shallower than it initially appears. Treading the same few areas at different times of day and sometimes there's snow. Barely anything changing between these other than enemy placement and some doors being open/closed. It gets old fast.
You find documents and lore about the place, but all of it seems to hint to larger stuff that doesn't pay off. I fucked the ending of the game for myself because you've to approach someone at the end of a long bridge to have a chat, and I tapped R2 to draw my gun just in case, this is when I learned that drawing it this way also fires it, and I hit them right between the eyes. No chat for me. Just standing there now, expected to make a decision based on no info. Deflated, I picked one at random, and got a cutscene that I can't even glean whether it was a good or bad ending. So off to youtube I went to see what I missed, and wouldn't ya know it, I got the bad ending. They're both bad endings. Not that there is no good ending, it's just that what they consider to be good is also a bad ending. A shit ending. They fuck the game right up the wall at the end, pay nothing off, and roll credits on you.
You just get nothing here, man. A cowardly exit. Plenty of the middle of this thing is great fun when you've hit a good stride, but you can feel it start limping in the last third. It also doesn't help that on PS5 I was plagued with visual and menu bugs that often resulted in me having to quit out. I dunno. I've only played the Dishonored games, and Prey, but this is Arkane's weakest for me. Feels like I've wasted my time here, that includes typing all this out when I could have just written "cunt game" and went to bed.
I was getting some kind of sensory overload every time I had to browse them. It somehow looks so much more complicated than it actually is, and I'll never understand how this setup wasn't just the first prototype for a menu system. Also, still with the controller cursor for navigation? Come on.
The game is pretty fun when the loop (shut up) starts making sense, but the premise itself kinda reveals the whole thing to be much shallower than it initially appears. Treading the same few areas at different times of day and sometimes there's snow. Barely anything changing between these other than enemy placement and some doors being open/closed. It gets old fast.
You find documents and lore about the place, but all of it seems to hint to larger stuff that doesn't pay off. I fucked the ending of the game for myself because you've to approach someone at the end of a long bridge to have a chat, and I tapped R2 to draw my gun just in case, this is when I learned that drawing it this way also fires it, and I hit them right between the eyes. No chat for me. Just standing there now, expected to make a decision based on no info. Deflated, I picked one at random, and got a cutscene that I can't even glean whether it was a good or bad ending. So off to youtube I went to see what I missed, and wouldn't ya know it, I got the bad ending. They're both bad endings. Not that there is no good ending, it's just that what they consider to be good is also a bad ending. A shit ending. They fuck the game right up the wall at the end, pay nothing off, and roll credits on you.
You just get nothing here, man. A cowardly exit. Plenty of the middle of this thing is great fun when you've hit a good stride, but you can feel it start limping in the last third. It also doesn't help that on PS5 I was plagued with visual and menu bugs that often resulted in me having to quit out. I dunno. I've only played the Dishonored games, and Prey, but this is Arkane's weakest for me. Feels like I've wasted my time here, that includes typing all this out when I could have just written "cunt game" and went to bed.
2021
I am so shit at roguelikes.
This is pretty gutting because I am extremely into every aspect of this bar the gameplay loop. My brain can't take another 4 hour run goin' down the shitter because I fell into a small pool of water, or dodged backwards into a projectile I didn't know was there. I'm away to google "what's up with that fuckin' house?".
This is pretty gutting because I am extremely into every aspect of this bar the gameplay loop. My brain can't take another 4 hour run goin' down the shitter because I fell into a small pool of water, or dodged backwards into a projectile I didn't know was there. I'm away to google "what's up with that fuckin' house?".
Kirby comes to my house, and he eats dinner.
2000
Immortal bastard repeatedly impeded.
Hahaha yeeeeeees! That's how ye do DLC!
Fun and interesting mini challenges that keep things fresh (booyah), and it actually tying into the main stuff, not being a daft side story. Roll on Splatoon 3, man. They've hooked me.
Fun and interesting mini challenges that keep things fresh (booyah), and it actually tying into the main stuff, not being a daft side story. Roll on Splatoon 3, man. They've hooked me.
I decided to replay FF1 before Stranger of Paradise, as if it will matter for anything beyond maybe some familiar names, or seeing an old sprite in magical 3D. But my soul would not permit me to miss the opportunity of being able to go "Oh, it's that dude, and he's in that place! Wow!".
2019
It's very charming at first with the story and wee nods to classic British stuff, but it quickly falls off in a frenzy of references, split up by dogshit platforming and floaty controls.
I moved down a high street section and saw a poster of pixel Jimmy Savile advertising the trains. I quickly googled and saw there were 16 more chapters and decided that was me done.
I moved down a high street section and saw a poster of pixel Jimmy Savile advertising the trains. I quickly googled and saw there were 16 more chapters and decided that was me done.
1996
Great fun in that classic PC game way, but man does it become nonsense near the end. Amounts of ranged enemies that feel like a joke. I fired infinite health on for the last quarter to stop me abandoning it. Lovely hammy high fantasy is gradually finding it's way into my heart.
It's a strange thing to say, but all I can think of when I look at Diablo is The Legend of Mir. That was the first time I ever saw a game that looked this way. It used to get shown all the time on a Sky channel we had in the UK called GameNetwork. An Italian channel but all presented in English. They ran LoM footage constantly. I mind the presenter was always in her bare feet, but I'm sure that awakened nothing in young me.
At night the channel became Babestation.
It's a strange thing to say, but all I can think of when I look at Diablo is The Legend of Mir. That was the first time I ever saw a game that looked this way. It used to get shown all the time on a Sky channel we had in the UK called GameNetwork. An Italian channel but all presented in English. They ran LoM footage constantly. I mind the presenter was always in her bare feet, but I'm sure that awakened nothing in young me.
At night the channel became Babestation.
What a lovely thing this is. A gorgeous world to explore. Got that throwback adventure game feel, but looks incredible.
The environments are so lush and everything feels real. Like naturally occurring, if that makes sense. You're not spotting assets copy and pasted all over. It truly comes across like villages built through a gigantic forest. The land itself dictating where you can and can't have houses and roads. Beautiful.
The story is nothing incredible and combat is serviceable, but for some reason this just got its hooks into me. Kickin' about with yer wee pals The Rot. Clearing corruption and freeing trapped spirits. It's feelgood stuff. Nae cynicism, and not overly boohoo manipulative shit. Just a properly nice time.
I'm eager to see what Ember Lab comes out with next. This as their first game is very promising.
The environments are so lush and everything feels real. Like naturally occurring, if that makes sense. You're not spotting assets copy and pasted all over. It truly comes across like villages built through a gigantic forest. The land itself dictating where you can and can't have houses and roads. Beautiful.
The story is nothing incredible and combat is serviceable, but for some reason this just got its hooks into me. Kickin' about with yer wee pals The Rot. Clearing corruption and freeing trapped spirits. It's feelgood stuff. Nae cynicism, and not overly boohoo manipulative shit. Just a properly nice time.
I'm eager to see what Ember Lab comes out with next. This as their first game is very promising.