1996
When you catch Moltres, it knows Peck and Fire Spin. Level it up once and it learns fucking LEER. Level it up 10 times and it learns some useless moves. Wowie zowie.
1996
When you catch Articuno, it knows Peck and Ice Beam. Level it up once and it learns Blizzard. Level it up 10 times and it learns some useless moves. Wowie zowie.
1998
Thank you for releasing me.
1998
The most hilarious game ever made.
1998
Zangief flips a table while Akuma goes swimming.
1998
I miss Phil Hartman.
This game costs hundreds of dollars to own physically and it's almost worth it.
Coco told Crash Bandicoot to study a bunch of baseball tapes so that he could learn how to slide like the best of them, and we are all better for it.
1996
Welcome to Mario Kart? More like welcome to Mario FART! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO fireworks
I've had the character select theme as my ringtone for over a decade.
1996
Crash Bandicoot has the IQ of a bag of peanuts and some loose twine and can't figure out how to accurately save his progress.
Casual reminder that Geno is a bland, wooden doll that does virtually nothing for the entire story.
1994
Donkey Kong Country is truly perfect. If you do not get this amazing new generation of Donkey Kong Country madness, you are stupid. Yes, I know it's insulting, but it's also the truth. If you're a true video game fan, you will not hesitate in the slightest bit to buy this piece of gaming history.
1993
The children are left in shambles as they learn Karnov, The One True Character, is not playable in this.
1994
Man I get it but I just dont get it. As far as I'm concerned the only things that hold up are its aesthetics and the whole sequence breaking thing. While the game looks and sounds good and sequence breaking is cool in theory, at the end of the day you have to play Super Metroid.
Super Metroid, for its nearly unrivaled pedigree and acclaim, is one of the worst playing and feeling games I ever played for so many reasons. Let's list them! Samus has weird crap acceleration
Jumping is slow, floaty and destroys your momentum
Dash being a "B" button prompt fucks the ENTIRE button layout
Scrolling through missiles/bombs/whatever by mashing select
Walljumping is designed for sequence breaking in future playthroughs which means it's incredibly obtuse to perform without looking it up
Consecutive space jumps have a weird timing window that's less consistent than walljumping that doesn't add meaningfully to the gameplay
Quicksand gets an honorable mention for being egregiously heinous
Take all this, and add that there's no real fast travel option and a map that doesn't tell you what rooms are actually connected and you just have a lot of wasted time running around with these awful controls and my patience just thinned and thinned and thinned.
Real shit, if this game ever gets remade with GBAesque controls and changes to its button layout the game it'll probably be Actually Good but until then two playthroughs of this shit is enough for twelve lifetimes.
Super Metroid, for its nearly unrivaled pedigree and acclaim, is one of the worst playing and feeling games I ever played for so many reasons. Let's list them! Samus has weird crap acceleration
Jumping is slow, floaty and destroys your momentum
Dash being a "B" button prompt fucks the ENTIRE button layout
Scrolling through missiles/bombs/whatever by mashing select
Walljumping is designed for sequence breaking in future playthroughs which means it's incredibly obtuse to perform without looking it up
Consecutive space jumps have a weird timing window that's less consistent than walljumping that doesn't add meaningfully to the gameplay
Quicksand gets an honorable mention for being egregiously heinous
Take all this, and add that there's no real fast travel option and a map that doesn't tell you what rooms are actually connected and you just have a lot of wasted time running around with these awful controls and my patience just thinned and thinned and thinned.
Real shit, if this game ever gets remade with GBAesque controls and changes to its button layout the game it'll probably be Actually Good but until then two playthroughs of this shit is enough for twelve lifetimes.