A couple months ago, I decided to breathe some new life into my old, beat up Sega Dreamcast, and transferred its internals into a new shell. While I was up in them guts, I figured I'd go the extra mile and put in a PicoPSU, Noctua fan, and (most importantly) a GDEMU clone. I own three Dreamcast games on disc, they're all Sonic and they're all scratched to hell, and considering the longevity of Dreamcast disc drives, it did not pain me to rip that sucker out of there. Besides, an SD card opens me up to games I'd never dream of affording...

Anyway, I 100%'d Sonic Adventure 2 again. God damnit, why do I keep ending up here?

I explicitly told myself I would not, but looking at my childhood save file, I was maybe eight to ten hours of actual work shy of running through Green Hill, which I've previously unlocked twice on two different versions of the game (the Dreamcast original via emulation, and Battle for the GameCube.) It's not like I had something to prove so much as I hated the idea of leaving something undone, even if it meant feeding a Chao the same skeleton dog over and over again for three hours while alone in a dark room. Oh well, my time could not be less valuable.

I bring all this up because I'm going to say some fairly disparaging things about Sonic Adventure 2 - which for a lot of people sits in this exalted "sacred cow" position - and I just need everyone to accept that I've done my time with this game and feel pretty strongly about it.

Sonic Adventure 2 condenses Sonic Adventure's six distinct gameplay styles into three, and makes each of them more robust, which on paper sounds great. Sounds like something you'd do with a sequel, cut all the filler and build out from what worked... Only, I think adding more to the mech and emerald hunting stages makes them a total drag to play. What was once arcadey and enjoyable is now bloated and boring, sometimes outright frustrating. Sonic and Shadow get the best levels of the bunch, but given how often these brief bursts of fun are interrupted, does it even really matter?

Even setting aside my grievances with the way these modes are designed, I feel like Sonic Adventure 2 is just... sloppy. It has the collision detection of a cheap D-tier licensed platformer, with characters constantly juttering and clipping when making slight contact with uneven surfaces. Even flat surfaces are temperamental given how often Sonic, Tails, or Knuckles will catch on some 1 pixel tall seam. The camera is uncooperative, characters move inconsistently, and every part of the geometry feels like it's held together by Elmer's glue and tongue depressors. So much as brush a corner wrong and the game will shut off whatever complex calculation it needs to run to determine momentum. Having done this three times now, I can confidently say the worst part of the 180 emblem experience is fighting with the parts of the game that are unpredictable, like, you know, landing on a solid stationary platform and just falling through it.

This is all coming from the guy who frequently writes Labyrinth Zone apologia on Backloggd Dot Com, so I can't stress enough that my opinion on this shouldn't be taken as some condemnation of those who enjoy Sonic Adventure 2, or a statement that I'm more right for having a dissenting opinion. There's thousands of you and uh... I don't think there's even a dozen people that like Labyrinth. And hey, Sonic Adventure 2 isn't without its charm. I've previously praised the excellent soundtrack, which I remember owning once on CD (which also got scratched to hell), and though I hated the tonal shift SA2 made at the time, I think it's probably the best part of the game now. The voice clips cutting off, Grandpa Robotnik being put in front of a firing squad... it's not good, but it's good.

Unfortunately, it's not enough to bring me around on the game as a whole package, and I feel like the amount of hours I've logged both qualifies my dislike while calling into question my sanity. Sometimes you go for 180 emblems in Sonic Adventure 2 while playing Mario Party 6 while playing In Sound Mind while playing Shining in the Darkness. Sometimes you're just that kind of depressed, where you're glad you don't live with someone who could walk by your room and see you running through Mad Space and think "oh god he's spiraling." But it doesn't matter now. I'm finished. I never have to do this ever again.

Oh hey, Sonic Adventure 2 Battle is on sale on Xbox...!

Probably the best 2D Zelda game so far. Minish cap hold charm for how it gets its points right. Its a smaller world for a small device, akin to link's awakening in design. Plus it has everything you'd expect from a game titled Zelda.

My biggest gripes are reoccurring issues, that later dungeons get really convoluted that it's just a handicap to not have a guide for the tough parts on. 2nd is that the game dangles a lot of items that you can't reach yet, so you need to make notes for what you missed since the game doesn't offer markers if you entered the area once and going back and forth to check if you've progressed enough to get it plus the tedium of some areas really makes it a chore.

However, it's the most well-rounded 2D entry and if there's one 2D Zelda you'd play, make it this one.

Really wished I wasn't so overly-exposed on almost every facet of this fucking game before I played it - if Odyssey was the Sun, I would have 3rd degree burns by how many rays have penetrated my skin.
Anyway I like the game! Mario's most maximalist adventure yet and oh boy, they sure didn't know when and where to stop!
Maximalist because, Mario neva felt more free-a to play and be played! Jump, ground-pound, roll (I fuck with that heavily) and cappy trickshot your way to A-B, however you wish. Or remember, because they really infused those two joycons (it really do be the best way to play the game) with as many actions it could possibly fit through it's buttons and motion flicks that it kind of overwhelmed by the beginning. I still felt a certain unease of overcoming larger gaps, not by skill, but by praying that my brain and muscle memory wouldn't falter and send me to my fatal demise. But at it's best, you be shmooving like a butter knife through butter. Fashonin' Mario up is so cute and fun I adored it, love just how much there is :)!
Maximalist because, the sheer variety of worlds through play, size and visuals. I always fuck with games that can yield such different visuals ends in the same game while maintaining cohesion: The dark and semi-realistic dragon kingdom in contrast to the heavily poly-reduced gradient landscape of the Luncheon Kingdom still feel like they fit the plumber on his 'venture. How even the worlds structurally feel different: to the linear vertical climb of the Wooded Kingdom to the open-ended Seaside Kingdom with the map-sized Boss-battle. They really tried everything and anything I respect that.
Maximalist because obv. the moons lol. It is kind of insane how they just keep adding more and more moons and how in 3 minutes you stumble into three, four- no 5 different Hänsel & Gretel breadcrumb trails to the next Moon right around the corner, like it's a McDonalds in a densely populated city. Some moon feel cool to get, most have been dropped by someone on their hurried way to work.
Maximalist because,...more. More moons, more costumes, more enemies capture mechanics that barely scratch their mechanical surface but you don't notice it cuz it happens to fast, more set-pieces, more everything.
And the game never really stops with that. After the credits roll, there is just a lot more to do now. I respect it, but no thanks! Luigi's Balloons is really cool, I do love me that. But if I want to experience a Dark(er) Side of the Moon, imma stick to that Pink Floyd im good thanky.