Scooz
1997
this game still kicks ass supreme but it's weird revisiting and getting to domestic abuser Cid. you go from Barret being betrayed and losing an arm and Cloud's identity crisis, serious stakes in the world of the story but tonally light as a player, to Cid abusing the shit out of a woman for decades because she saved his life and she's so broken from him that she thinks she deserves it. fuck this guy get him AWAY from her!!!!! it's just a bit jarring, tonally, going from this morally-dark abuser party member to ex-wifeguy vampire Vincent, Sephiroth's goth step-dad.
fun, janky FPS combat paired with some of the most embarrassing writing ever seen in a video game. two women follow you around who are both SO desperate for your boring actionman fantasyguy dick and never shut up about how cool and sexy you are the entire time. like they're not even characters outside of how badly they want to fuck, it's so overbearing that it's funny. it's on that anime mobile phone horny gacha advertisement shit. i don't think i've ever cared less about the story in a video game, it's the lamest kind of tabletop nerd fantasy, but i don't think anyone who's played this cares about it either. the game's encounter design and the way you, inevitably, end up using the arena's to score environmental kick kills is the core appeal. and it's fun!!!! i like kicking nerds into: pits, oceans, spikes, fire, and more! most of it feels pretty rough, though. movement and regular combat are very clunky and awkward, stairs are a nightmare, and it has some questionable collision at times - but the time you'll spend with your foot up a dude's rear end is good.
look. look. we all know SMT IVA and SMT V's writing is awful but that doesn't make Isabeau good. you don't need to pretend she's a good character you're not immune to waifu-baiting anime-pandering and that's ok. we're all human, no one's flawless.
2006
"it has heart tho!" no it don't!!!! you just have a sonic the hedgehog™ branded tumor in your pituitary gland
2020
when this came out my bf bought $80 of Omori merch from the omocat store and they just never shipped it. refused to give us a refund. we asked what was up and they were like "yeah we did not ship your shit lol" and only gave us like $50 of in store credit instead of the merch they took (and kept) our money for. paid for the shipping too and it's kinda expensive as hell to do that from the US. the game's pretty okay tho.
why did they make Tifa a generic 'pleasant' bubbly anime woman. why is she holding onto Cloud's arm like 'oooh i'm soooo scaaareeed!' like they nail almost everyone except Tifa. why is she so boring and submissive and weak. why isn't she calling me slurs.
2023
one might say that Akira Yamaoka is the Snoop Dogg of video game music, showing up in shit way below his pedigree as long as he gets paid. his own personal Corey Feldman feature is his work for Stray Souls. Stray Souls is a UE 5 asset flip made by an ex-Bloober uber-racist with no real ideas or vision beyond being sorta like other games you know and FINALLY giving Silent Hill a Dark Souls dodge roll. don't worry: it has lots of AI generated slop in it too! it's got that Slender fangame pacing and design, a nauseating camera, what could be defined as animation, and a 'the cake is a lie' reference in this video game released in late 2023. tbh, if it weren't for the devs being transphobic art thieves i'd support it for being a lil funny but there's no heart behind this slop. cutscenes goofy tho!!! worth watching but not playing.
2022
the real splatfest is between whether or not i'll see more softcore bara furry porn or softcore foot porn in the plaza
i played this before the SBFP LP, people seemed generally positive on it before then and i thought it looked cool. it is not. why is David Bowie here.
2019
yeah, i sure hope they do
reddit, sadly
2021
it makes me very, very happy that Mercurysteam clearly saw Prime 2's cutscenes where Samus just does cool shit and went "what if she was always like that"
2019
he's just like me fr...
2019
i hoped a remixed Persona 5 would change the horrifically mishandled sexual assault storyline to have mattered. i also hoped it wouldn't treat Ryuji's abuse like a joke. but i guess asking for Persona 5 to be good was asking for too much.
1987
beans on toast ass game