194 Reviews liked by car0n


a british "person" tells me what to do while a bunch of philosophy degree gamers tell me THATS THE POINT!!!!!!! and yet i do not care. stop being british ok just stop

Tunic

2022

I absolutely adore the idea of playing this game and actually abhor the reality of playing this game.

Made me realize how much real-life art galleries fall short of their potential by not having vibe-heavy music pulsating throughout them

A Jerma playthrough of this would be insane

This review contains spoilers

don't say this often but...
what was even the point of the dog

This is, by all technicalities, a quirky indie RPG about depression

In Metal Gear Solid you play as a man named Snake who wears a bandana and is a clone of another man named Snake who also wore a bandana, as well as the brother of another man named Snake who does not wear a bandana and is also blond. You fight a man named Ocelot who thinks he is a cowboy, as well as a man in a gas mask who knows what games you like, as well as an invisible ninja who makes an otaku pee himself, as well as an Alaskan shaman who carries a gatling gun on his back, as well as a blonde woman who has her tiddies out in sub-zero temperatures. You also become best friends with the otaku who pissed himself and can save a woman with a nice butt if you mash buttons fast enough. Also, there is a giant robot that shoots nukes, and the plot is based on a fundamental misunderstanding of how dominant and recessive genes work.

Despite all of this, Metal Gear Solid is a deeply impactful game, and I count it among my favorites.

the internet was never a truly free or equitable space and was always being restrained and manipulated by capital forces but we really have traded away something so special for the sake of "streamlined user experience" without even realizing it and I doubt we can ever go back

This review contains spoilers

longest con stickbug meme in history

This review contains spoilers

This prequel, which for the last 2 hours is about magical necromancers raising the dead and BJ Blazkowics having to fight hordes of Zombies and a big video game final boss fight against a giant Zombie Monster, ends with your squadmate Fergus turning to BJ and saying, (and I quote)

"You sure killed that big fucking monster proper, BJ, But the biggest monster is still out there"

Referring to the very real threat of the Nazis in The New Order, the game that takes place literally right after this in a brutalist alternate timeline that has no mention of zombies or magic or necromancy anywhere.

This is all canon.

Downcels be seething over upchads

"We did it Patrick! We saved the city."

Stray

2022

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