Games I Will Force Hilda To Play

Everything but the first 44 games are very very bad and potentially offensive, but hildas must endure

Dread Weight
Dread Weight
Played august 30th:
Ph my god the cooking was talking and there was a DUCK?!?!? AUUGH?? 4 SPIRITS DID YOU FIND EVERYTHING?????
Gamer Girl
Gamer Girl
I believe it will come out
Garten of Banban 5
Garten of Banban 5
Gob
Gob
Hilda and the Tower of Lust
Hilda and the Tower of Lust
Played feb 1st

Please reach level 5 in Boobs and Being Licked to access this review
Nowhere, MI
Nowhere, MI
Rip Van Bubsy
Rip Van Bubsy
Dec 11th

wet paper towrl.
RuPaul's Drag Race Superstar
RuPaul's Drag Race Superstar
Dec 10th

RAVEN! INCOMING BOMB! TAKE COVER, TRENCHES! HUT TWO HUT TWO. WE WILL WIN THIS WAR WHATEVER IT TAKES
Silent Hill f
Silent Hill f
The Casting of Frank Stone
The Casting of Frank Stone
The Diner
The Diner
Played june 4th:

I go to the diner to get my diner popcorn and it is so fucking dark that i just wander around for 5 minutes and then the game ends.
The Tongue of Doge
The Tongue of Doge
Under the Witch: Beginnings
Under the Witch: Beginnings
Feb 10th 2024

skip the fart scene?
A Proper Cup of Tea
A Proper Cup of Tea
Kitty Kart 64
Kitty Kart 64
Played march 29th 2024

They should of built up to the driving out of bound weathertenko mario 64 speedrun any percent glitchless abney27 summoningsalt luigi circuit blindfolded raimbow road 1flap canonless beat strats
Apex Heroines
Apex Heroines
April 5 2024

boobi my assistant. I got a coin.
Pricolage: Idolized
Pricolage: Idolized
Disappearance: Takeshi. You were right. That Abandoned Village is Too Bad
Disappearance: Takeshi. You were right. That Abandoned Village is Too Bad
grandpa
KinitoPet
KinitoPet
Febuary something 2024

Cunt I Am hildas best friend do NOT play games. Alone in the Dark? What the fuck is this? Any hildabro would KNOW that she loves quiche and would KNOW that her favorite game is pokemon. Get your pink out of my stink
Silkbulb Test
Silkbulb Test
Buckshot Roulette
Buckshot Roulette
Feb 2024

Hilda (depressed): if i played russian roulette i wouldnt be scared
Last Seen Online
Last Seen Online
April 24 2024

Reminds me of hypnospace, very darling passion project
Garten of Banban 6
Garten of Banban 6
Dec 25th

This isnt funny any longer
sad, sad tears of a clown.
whirlpool of
sadness
hildas, deflated
defeated
emptied of joy
button puzzle
Closing at 2
Closing at 2
The Exit 8
The Exit 8
December 28th

->
->
<-
POSTAR!
->
->
<-
postar. uh oh. freeky....
<-
<-
->
normal in my hallway
->
->
<-
im so excited to get out of this hallway! by goodness, im almost there!
->
->
<-
0
oh... my word. i wish there was a beautiful closet woman to comfort me. but that would never happen.
This Bed We Made
This Bed We Made
Its Snowing
Its Snowing
Played at a point in january 2024

okay guys. so, you might think my itchio game is normal, but actually when you walk outside youll notice something wacky. Thats right, SHOES. on the ground! Ok, so thats crazy. But it wasnt crazy enough. My house? Its freaky. I go in there, and theres blood on the walls and shit! It wasnt there before oooo. But i'll go further. Freaky fucking jpg! Now youre really freaked. I cant stop myself guys.... SLAVERY. oh yeah, now thats scary.
Don't Scream
Don't Scream
Dec 7th

Interesting concept. I am excited to scream or laugh more in full release
Stray Souls
Stray Souls
Dec 6th

ok bye martha.
Case of the Mysterious Death of Keiko Haraeda
Case of the Mysterious Death of Keiko Haraeda
Played september 11th 2001

asshole game
Fears to Fathom: Ironbark Lookout
Fears to Fathom: Ironbark Lookout
Dec 27th

REDDIT, AITA? i (24) was driving along, in my chungus climplets RV when i decided to stop at a diner. I went in, greeted the waitress (tipped her 50%) and then remembered: i always pees bwfore i ate! So i (24) went to the batgroom. Now, i looked at the sink twice and it distracted me so bad i forgot to close the dungus door! But i already had my pants down, and the disfunction of the sink and the door caused me to just let my urine loose all over the floor. Now, i tipped 50%, so Reddit, aita for pissing on the floor? By the way i LOVE jackspectic eye and i cant women (except sister)
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
Revenge: Jane The Killer
Revenge: Jane The Killer
Feb 2024

JANE... SHEs gonna Kill Jeff and Kidnap his brother Its Time for the Sneaking section i zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Livestream 2: Escape from Togaezuka Happy Place
Livestream 2: Escape from Togaezuka Happy Place
Breaking Bad DS
Breaking Bad DS
Played november 30th

Failed quota. Sucked so hard. Skipped tutorial. Walteer
Orbo's Odyssey
Orbo's Odyssey
Played at a date

orbos dream.... shot straight like an arrow, across lava and cliffs and offices..... peeb....
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
Probably not bad but since hilda just LOVES Texas chainsaw massacre so much I am sure she will have a blast

Played may 29th:
No useful tutorials or map preview makes for the most confusing online horror game ive ever seen. Several mechanics just straight up were not explained and theres no explanation online. Seems like it could be fun but someone needs to write a breakdown on what youre supposed to do in this game.

BUBBA SWEEP!!
Garten of Banban 4
Garten of Banban 4
Played august 10th:

Ohh opibaby bird opila bird delightfult bird so wide eyed and beautiful how could theu have done this to you you were jjst a baby a small.little baby...

CHOO CHOO CARL.
Taboo Trial
Taboo Trial
Played september 21st

Sprints at 80 miles per hour and slaps you in the face face with my unbearably huge fucking knockers. Only one aerola.
Unsorted Horror
Unsorted Horror
Played september 1st:
That horror was sorted. Battleship time!
My Friendly Neighborhood
My Friendly Neighborhood
Played july 25th:
This was like a strange bugsnax esque game but the implied religious symbolism was strange
Reunion
Reunion
Feb 11th 2024

My BROTHER.... my jeffrey flesh and dahmer blood.... you spared .me.......
Sentimental Death Loop
Sentimental Death Loop
Played september 23rd

Oh my god that lady has ber underwear out quickly put the batteries in the remote zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz oh it was friendship.
Choo Choo Survivor
Choo Choo Survivor
Played august 7th:
5 second game. did not survive.
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Could be fun

Played sometime in june:
A pretty blatant attempt to cash in on acnh success but the tutorials were insanely long and outside of that, there wasnt much to interact with
Amnesia: The Bunker
Amnesia: The Bunker
Played june 6th:

I hate amnesia and i hate their games and i hate reading 500 notes and i hate world war 1 and i hate the french and i hate that gay glasses dude that died in a gay fashion and i hate finding keys and i hate the gun you only use to shoot barrels and doors and i hate that awful awful awful wet shit of an ending that i stayed up to watch but i do like world whirls guy.
Killer Frequency
Killer Frequency
Played june 1st:
I was looking forward to it but nothing really makes any sense and the hook feels like it doesnt exist. The dialogue feels stilted and offputting and none of the jokes landed. There is no horror or sense of anticipation. I have never ever ever gotten bored with a game but i got too restless to even continue watching. Really, really weird execution.
Bakeborough
Bakeborough
The Lord of the Rings: Gollum
The Lord of the Rings: Gollum
Played may 30th:

I fell asleep and it was such a good sleep.
Didnt even make it to the breeding grounds however, where the game really goes to die..... gollum, gollum....
The Outlast Trials
The Outlast Trials
The trial is trying to get this piece of shit to download
Garten of Banban 3
Garten of Banban 3
Played may 6th;
Best bday gift ive ever recieved
I'm Scared of My Girlfriend
I'm Scared of My Girlfriend
'Played' on september 23rd

how am i supposed to develop a personality when my abusive girlfriend is SUCH a silly little goose????!??!? trip and grace with a twist
The Creepy Syndrome
The Creepy Syndrome
Rewind or Die
Rewind or Die
Played April 28th

Puppet combo Is a hack and makes the most unfun games imaginable
Dredge
Dredge
I don't know what this is

Played April 12:
I still don't know what this is
See No Fear
See No Fear

Played April 4th: you move very slow and there's so many invisible walls.
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
My House
My House
Played may 28th:
It was a bit boring to watch because it was pretty much just doom inside a house with some weird things occasionally. I thought it might be creepier, but i dont much sbout doom so i cant attest to it really.
Ms.Lemons
Ms.Lemons
YOU WILL finish ms lemons so help me god....

March 18th replayed, ms lemons is filth
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Found on switch store. Looks incomprehensible.

Played April 4th:
This game appears to be overly "girly" and cute but then the main character has skimpy anime clothes and breast physics. It's a bit sad cause it could of been something.
Love Love School Days
Love Love School Days
Played at some point in september:

Baka baka baka. The mantra of thr fastest girl alive. Shes going to beat you to do death so watch out.
Sexts
Sexts
Quest for Moomoo
Quest for Moomoo
Played december 1st

so sloppy and empty. hated this, dont lead me on with an image of a cow.
NSFW Solitaire
NSFW Solitaire
played on April 22:
this is the worst and it should not exist
Hippo: Little Red Riding Hood
Hippo: Little Red Riding Hood
Played April 4th:
This game was maybe 12 minutes long. There was a dinosaur that was defied by the valorant hippo. I was playing octopath, oops
Yeah! Fighting Girl
Yeah! Fighting Girl
Jan 15th 2024

Artorias: The abyss is consuming me. i can hardly put up a fight anymore, I can feel its way clawing through my body... I can only hope for a swift end.

Debt Collector LuLu Bear: girl! You better put up a fight or i will sell you to goblins! Now do a sexy 13,000 dollar dance.
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark II
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark II
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
SAW!!!!! I wanna play a game!!!!! Lol

Played March 24th

i hate this.
Mario: The Music Box Remastered
Mario: The Music Box Remastered
Played august 12:

If the protagonist was anything but mario this would be an average rpgmaker game but watching my friend mario break his back in a fall down a pit and choke on his own blood left me speechless. There is nothing in this game that pertains to mario outside of his appearance. Why would you want to hurt mario? He is so nice and can jump really high and has 3 lives and love for everyone and you hurt him? A lot? Concerned.
Saturnalia
Saturnalia
Played october 7th

lasanga maria called me the f word! But i was asleep. Shit garbage. Nick, KILL yourself NOW!
Better Call Saul Kart
Better Call Saul Kart
Better

Played june 5th:

Game has an unpleasant feeling but i am glad everyone made up and was happy forever.
Graveyard Girls
Graveyard Girls
Jan 12th 2024

Sad game mostly pertaining to the death of a family member. Hilda can not read
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
MythBusters: The Game
MythBusters: The Game
Played dec 10th

uh... the grenade exploded and... uh...myth busted! soo... time to... buy stuff from my own warehouse... maybe.... i think.....where am i..
Beat Refle
Beat Refle
2024 February

uhhh.... ahhh.... shee was standing there, ass in her hair. without a care.
Salamander County Public Television
Salamander County Public Television
Collapse Relapse
Collapse Relapse
The Quarry
The Quarry
October 18th:

They had the gall to wrangle together a game that couldnt even take itself seriously for half a second with zero atmosphere and no redeeming qualities and even still they had the audacity to make a joke of the Andes rugby team mountain crash. Also, werewolves? Wolves? No... just generic gmod creatures... absolute puke.

A man cut off his arm- dramatic action. Zero gravity. Also, he would die. From shock. I wish he did.
Good Job!
Good Job!
Played october 11th

oh my lady, clantly boobed. Unfortunately, was your voice not annoyin. how sad.
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
I have an excellent on Jitterbug on hard, my only claim to fame

Played on April 7th: hilda got so overwhelmed after 3 songs that she just gave up and watched me play
The Future You've Been Dreaming Of
The Future You've Been Dreaming Of
Dec 22nd

She masturbated her ankles. this god damn clutz. cant do anything right.
Marble Maid
Marble Maid
Feb 1st

The long lasted emotional struggle between wanting to play monkey ball, and masturbate. finally solved. Thanks man.
Neko Secret: Homecoming
Neko Secret: Homecoming
Switch store page is scary

Halfway through thid game someone started screaming outside my apartment and threatening to call the cops. But i was dressing up a scary woman. Too busy for such things. Vaginas like open wounds, must be the neko secret?
Mario In Clock Town
Mario In Clock Town
Played april 30th:

This made me appreciate the enemy placement of normal mario a lot more
Mirror 2: Project X
Mirror 2: Project X
Discovered through a game called "novastella Island", which was apparently supposed to be an adult game that got changed into a farming sim (very obvious).

played at some point

I wasnt texting the whole time i remember everything like uhhmm ms naoki and the boobs and the mirrors and the dramaa. And that lady. And the curse. And the puzzle.
Mr.Tomatos
Mr.Tomatos
Played on March 18th

confusion about Mr tomato gameplay at the beginning, would of enjoyed if it didn't delete your save file after every fail
Aria and the Mysterious Mushroom
Aria and the Mysterious Mushroom
Pui Pui Molcar Let's! Molcar Party!
Pui Pui Molcar Let's! Molcar Party!
Played April 26th:
AHHHHHH PUI PUI PUI PUI PUI AAAAAAAAHHH MOL!CAR!MOL!CAR!MOL!CAR! Mario party who? This is all anyone should know, put a hat on that molcar and watch it go...
Andy's Apple Farm
Andy's Apple Farm
Played on august 3rd:

Oh my god he was a killer. Oh ym christ. All those apple children.
My Friend Peppa Pig
My Friend Peppa Pig
You will never be finfin (on planet teo)
Cooking Companions
Cooking Companions
I don't even think this is the worst i just wanna see what she thinks

Played March 28th: aaa scary aa aaaa
Nothing Special
Nothing Special
Played April 21st:
This game had a really bad atmosphere to it, so much so that I didn't get to laugh at it being funny. Very uncomfortable but not how the game intended
Pedestal
Pedestal
Played 29th feb 2024

she killed her self. or not. its so #funny and #crazey when girls jump off roofs. apathy is the best approach to this situation. after all why should i distrust someone with such a strong hand on the pulse of the mentally disturbed. YOU go crazy.
Buff Imposter
Buff Imposter
Hilda wanted this on the list, not me

Player april 29th:
Clipped out of bounds, failed milk pick up. Game is nothing
Oppai Academy Big, Bouncy, Booby Babes!
Oppai Academy Big, Bouncy, Booby Babes!
Dec 8th:

She was right! It wasnt funny! Why didnt we listen to her... i gotta shake my hips out of here! Waiter! Check please!
Oppai Academy Big, Bouncy, Booby Babes!
Oppai Academy Big, Bouncy, Booby Babes!
Oh my god i hope i pass boob school

(She dropped out! what a fool! forgot this was here too, now its twice.)
Last Light
Last Light
Cat Milk
Cat Milk
Played september 1st:
Holy fucign shit dhe .jumped that .cat off so many buildings
Savior of the Abyss
Savior of the Abyss
Dec 10th

Neighbors were yelling the whole time so i was focusing on them to make sure there was not a killer around and abound. She got eaten, by a door. Didnt save anything! what!
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
Finished august 29th:
Well hildas if youre reading this it was an honor and a pleasure to show you one of my favorite things in the world and i hope you had a good time. It was a very memorable experience and i had a blast reliving the game.

53 Comments


can't wait!!

now i feel inspired to do the same with CURSE ..... if i don't make the list... know it is happening slowly but surely

1 year ago

I'M NOT PLAYING FUCKING ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS
@Hilda what could possibly be bad about chipwrecked!!!!!
it's a ??rhythm game??? can you play with DDR pad?
it'll be fun!
Dead By Daylight and the Arthur game being added feel so mean spirited

1 year ago

I'd love to see that list but regardless I'm keeping him in my thoughts and prayers <3 but it would be very funny if you also made him play floigan bros. Although,, Hilda is my online friend so it's acceptable to spam her 24/7 with floigan threats, however I would be worried about the repercussions if I lived with them :P

1 year ago

@BEAUTIFULBRUTE Maybe someday I can convince myself to play it when I buy an adapter for my ddr pad that for my own sake hopefully doesn't work anymore
@BlazingWaters I spent years of my life in dead by daylight but some people would rather see me fall in the hole I climbed out of for so long

1 year ago

@BlazingWaters this is enrichment for Hildas (:

1 year ago

@CURSE she made it through frogger... she's trained to experience Arthur
It's funny 'cause the first three games seem at the bare minimun very fun, and then the flood gates are opened by Alvin and its friends.

I have no idea what even Mr Tomatos, and frankly, I am VERY scared to know.

1 year ago

@DemonAndGames the first 3 are some of my favorite pieces of art that I genuinely wanna show my friend here but the others are just funny lol
@moschidae <3 i understand
@Hilda ahh, well me & moschidae are the new founders of the get-hilda-an-adapter-for-ddr-pad-and-if-that-one-doesn't-work-a-whole-brand-new-one foundation. accepting sponsors

1 year ago

Buying hilda a ddr pad the SECOND I get my disability check next month

1 year ago

Buying myself a dramatically lit chair to sit in

1 year ago

we are fucking sponsored by ms. lemons !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 year ago

that arthuer and the invisibles stream was insane

1 year ago

Shoutout to Wayne, now I don't have to rummage through Wikipedia to find gems like arthur and floigan bros

1 year ago

Water Horse and Charlotte's web forever stuck in my brain. Also found out wikipedia diving that the dudes who founded the studio that made the original Shadowman, dipped and made a new studio, which then made cheap ass games, including Water Horse and Charlotte's web

1 year ago

Oh my god, im actually shocked by that. What a coincidence... Water Horse/Shadowman crossover when..?

Oh yeah, and thank you for reminding me that I need to make Hilda play Babe as well. I'm sure she'll love it (:

1 year ago

This has nothing to do with anything but they're making a Beverley Hills Chihuahua for adult straight men called Strays. i must remember it.

1 year ago

You don’t REALLY have to though…

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and I'll make you watch Strays

1 year ago

I’ll hopefully be catching some instead

1 year ago

Will Feral (changed his name for the movie) is in it. You will watch Strays.

1 year ago

You should add Wo Long I think it'd be kinda fucked up

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and someone is getting locked in the cupboard again ! Or put into a jar.

1 year ago

A worthy sacrifice for a mere cupboard

1 year ago

Does anyone else have any more bad game recommendations that are short-ish. I'm running out of ideas.

1 year ago

How short?

1 year ago

Uhhh like, 2 hours or less preferably
Barbie secret agent because CURS wouldn’t finish it when i tried to make em play even though he almost beat it !!!!!!!


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