Games I Will Force Hilda To Play

Everything but the first 44 games are very very bad and potentially offensive, but hildas must endure

Dredge
Dredge
I don't know what this is

Played April 12:
I still don't know what this is
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
Finished august 29th:
Well hildas if youre reading this it was an honor and a pleasure to show you one of my favorite things in the world and i hope you had a good time. It was a very memorable experience and i had a blast reliving the game.
Dead by Daylight
Dead by Daylight
Played April 7th:

Dbd is the only game that makes me feel like im working a 9 to 5 office job, and I only watched hilda play
OneShot
OneShot
The Quarry
The Quarry
October 18th:

They had the gall to wrangle together a game that couldnt even take itself seriously for half a second with zero atmosphere and no redeeming qualities and even still they had the audacity to make a joke of the Andes rugby team mountain crash. Also, werewolves? Wolves? No... just generic gmod creatures... absolute puke.

A man cut off his arm- dramatic action. Zero gravity. Also, he would die. From shock. I wish he did.
Buckshot Roulette
Buckshot Roulette
Feb 2024

Hilda (depressed): if i played russian roulette i wouldnt be scared
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Kirby: Planet Robobot
Kirby: Planet Robobot
Amnesia: The Bunker
Amnesia: The Bunker
Played june 6th:

I hate amnesia and i hate their games and i hate reading 500 notes and i hate world war 1 and i hate the french and i hate that gay glasses dude that died in a gay fashion and i hate finding keys and i hate the gun you only use to shoot barrels and doors and i hate that awful awful awful wet shit of an ending that i stayed up to watch but i do like world whirls guy.
My House
My House
Played may 28th:
It was a bit boring to watch because it was pretty much just doom inside a house with some weird things occasionally. I thought it might be creepier, but i dont much sbout doom so i cant attest to it really.
Rule of Rose
Rule of Rose
Shenmue
Shenmue
you didnt play this.
PaRappa the Rapper
PaRappa the Rapper
The Exit 8
The Exit 8
December 28th

->
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POSTAR!
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postar. uh oh. freeky....
<-
<-
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normal in my hallway
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im so excited to get out of this hallway! by goodness, im almost there!
->
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0
oh... my word. i wish there was a beautiful closet woman to comfort me. but that would never happen.
Ib
Ib
KinitoPet
KinitoPet
Febuary something 2024

Cunt I Am hildas best friend do NOT play games. Alone in the Dark? What the fuck is this? Any hildabro would KNOW that she loves quiche and would KNOW that her favorite game is pokemon. Get your pink out of my stink
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
Probably not bad but since hilda just LOVES Texas chainsaw massacre so much I am sure she will have a blast

Played may 29th:
No useful tutorials or map preview makes for the most confusing online horror game ive ever seen. Several mechanics just straight up were not explained and theres no explanation online. Seems like it could be fun but someone needs to write a breakdown on what youre supposed to do in this game.

BUBBA SWEEP!!
The Outlast Trials
The Outlast Trials
The trial is trying to get this piece of shit to download
Orbo's Odyssey
Orbo's Odyssey
Played at a date

orbos dream.... shot straight like an arrow, across lava and cliffs and offices..... peeb....
Killer Frequency
Killer Frequency
Played june 1st:
I was looking forward to it but nothing really makes any sense and the hook feels like it doesnt exist. The dialogue feels stilted and offputting and none of the jokes landed. There is no horror or sense of anticipation. I have never ever ever gotten bored with a game but i got too restless to even continue watching. Really, really weird execution.
PokéPark Wii: Pikachu's Adventure
PokéPark Wii: Pikachu's Adventure
Pickle chu
The Lord of the Rings: Gollum
The Lord of the Rings: Gollum
Played may 30th:

I fell asleep and it was such a good sleep.
Didnt even make it to the breeding grounds however, where the game really goes to die..... gollum, gollum....
My Friendly Neighborhood
My Friendly Neighborhood
Played july 25th:
This was like a strange bugsnax esque game but the implied religious symbolism was strange
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
SAW!!!!! I wanna play a game!!!!! Lol

Played March 24th

i hate this.
Garten of Banban 6
Garten of Banban 6
Dec 25th

This isnt funny any longer
sad, sad tears of a clown.
whirlpool of
sadness
hildas, deflated
defeated
emptied of joy
button puzzle
The Godfather
The Godfather
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
I have an excellent on Jitterbug on hard, my only claim to fame

Played on April 7th: hilda got so overwhelmed after 3 songs that she just gave up and watched me play
Legend of Mana
Legend of Mana
MySims
MySims
Played April 27th:

Found a game I played in my childhood.
.. was my Sims kingdom but I win
Silent Hill f
Silent Hill f
Poptropica
Poptropica
we need to make a hilda world

Feb 8th

GOD. WHERE. IS THE. CHUPICABRA. WHERES THE SPY ISLAND. WHERE IS IT, WHERE DID YOU HIDE HER. WHERES THE PUPPY OUTFIT, THE DRACULAS. IVE BEEN MOVING FORWSRD AND YOUVE BEEN MOVING BACK
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Played April 25th:

Frustrating and stupid boooooo booo....
white! White white white.....
Unsorted Horror
Unsorted Horror
Played september 1st:
That horror was sorted. Battleship time!
Telling Lies
Telling Lies
Façade
Façade
September 23rd

I want mineral ter! I want italy photo and couch. Trips ~fabulous~ home continues to be full of silliness. I am going to clip into your balcony now, okay.
Zero: Tsukihami no Kamen
Zero: Tsukihami no Kamen
The Thing
The Thing
Played june 7th:

I was painting. There was a cargo bay and a man and a friend and the friend kept dying and oh my godness... got thing'd. No puppy! Sad!
Barnyard
Barnyard
I played this as a child and loved it.. should of been a red herring, with the squirting mechanic and all


Played match 26th: the game froze and she lost all her progress. NOOO.... she hated the squirtibg part she can't handle it. But oh, i can.
Beat Refle
Beat Refle
2024 February

uhhh.... ahhh.... shee was standing there, ass in her hair. without a care.
Devilman
Devilman
Played some time in june

It was a very interesting and nostalgic ps2 game. I wish there was a English release so i could see what they were saying. There were a lot of spiders
Bubble Bath Babes
Bubble Bath Babes
I wanted her to play Babe ps2.

Played 4/20:
Do you see that? Yeah.... thats right. You know
...Iru!
...Iru!
Frogger's Adventures: Temple of the Frog
Frogger's Adventures: Temple of the Frog
Jan 11th

We are gathered here today to remember our dear friend, Frogger. This tombstone is for one half of him. And this tombstone, the other. For he was split in two by a spike machine. May D carry his soul to another plane. Amen.
Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon
Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon
Stuart Little 3: Big Photo Adventure
Stuart Little 3: Big Photo Adventure
At my local grocery store there is a place where you could dump off children, and my mom left me there a few times while she was running errands. They had a ps2 with this and the Robots (movie) game and I played them frequently. I remember being mystified with stuarts skateboard.

Played March 27th: hildas mind is so fucked
Vampire Hunter D
Vampire Hunter D
Sara is Missing
Sara is Missing
Hunt Down the Freeman
Hunt Down the Freeman
Arthur and the Invisibles
Arthur and the Invisibles

Played March 20th
A disappointment through and through though this would inevitably lead to the Great French Movie disaster
Koikatsu Party
Koikatsu Party
Played august 8th:
My poor demented woman and her festering aerola disease suffers a grand mal seizure with every orgasm... SAD.
Sexts
Sexts
Barbie Horse Adventures: Riding Camp
Barbie Horse Adventures: Riding Camp
This is the right game. My apologies.

Played may 24th:

Still not sure this is the right game but that could be because there was some kind of weird curse on the game where dialogue would loop and the screen looked doubled. Barbie was a horse and ran into an invisible wall making the race impossible to finish. Hi barbie.....

Anonymous Agony
Anonymous Agony
Played august 5th:
I do not believe this game opens with a 2 hour cutscene about a very threatening man named jokester54.
Introvert: A Teenager Simulator
Introvert: A Teenager Simulator
Tonyzaret video

Played 26th feb 2024

So... yeah. My furry girlfriend turned out to be an actually werewolf, but before we could get to first base this nerd in my class brought out a shotgun and threatened to shoot up the school! And i was like uhmmmm so that just happened??? I mean, who brings a SHOTGUN to a school shooting. Thats cringier than the time my teacher interrupted class to t pose! Anyways, that basically sums up my #awkwardsauce life
Ao Oni 3
Ao Oni 3
Played on April 18th:

Booooooooooooooooooooo
Wipeout: The Game
Wipeout: The Game
Miasmata
Miasmata
Jan 7th 2024

that guys arm is soo funny aha theres a frog ahha zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Zzzzzzzzzzz
Zzzzzzzz
Zzzzzzz
ah aha hey wheres the game
Spice World
Spice World
Played April 12:

If you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you wanna be my lover if you
Garten of Banban 4
Garten of Banban 4
Played august 10th:

Ohh opibaby bird opila bird delightfult bird so wide eyed and beautiful how could theu have done this to you you were jjst a baby a small.little baby...

CHOO CHOO CARL.
Nowhere, MI
Nowhere, MI
Monsters vs. Aliens
Monsters vs. Aliens
Witch's Heart
Witch's Heart
Closing at 2
Closing at 2
Buddy Simulator 1984
Buddy Simulator 1984
April 11 2024

Omg guys i just read the wikipedia page for bpd and i think i have an idea thatll finally make this undertale mario & luigi doki doki creepypastas club thing happen
Cat Milk
Cat Milk
Played september 1st:
Holy fucign shit dhe .jumped that .cat off so many buildings
Build-A-Bear Workshop
Build-A-Bear Workshop
iCarly
iCarly
Love Love School Days
Love Love School Days
Played at some point in september:

Baka baka baka. The mantra of thr fastest girl alive. Shes going to beat you to do death so watch out.
MazM: Jekyll and Hyde
MazM: Jekyll and Hyde
Played october 29th:

Thought it would be a stinker till mr hyde became sexified. Tearing up the streets of london and kicking children, just as i remember. Werk your gay ass down the halls on your quest for salt, kill those senile old men. Youre a star and everyone knows it. 50? Unmarried? In the 1800s? You wanted utterson ass and we all know it. Dont repress it. Youre all invited to my coming out banquet. Thank you.
The Sopranos: Road to Respect
The Sopranos: Road to Respect
Played may 30th:
Sopranos knowledge 0 but was expecting worse. Controls like Yakuza ripping GTA's eyes out. but theres massive chest in this game WITH. NIPPLE. oh my god! Squirt.
Honey Select 2: Libido DX
Honey Select 2: Libido DX
played dec 8th

flight 747, ready and waiting for takeoff. Oh just kidding i cant have gay DEMON sex with my clothes on. Worst experience of my life, me and my hot pants are out.
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark II
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark II
Collapse Relapse
Collapse Relapse
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Could be fun

Played sometime in june:
A pretty blatant attempt to cash in on acnh success but the tutorials were insanely long and outside of that, there wasnt much to interact with
Bob the Builder: Can We Fix It?
Bob the Builder: Can We Fix It?
Webkinz Next
Webkinz Next
Bakeborough
Bakeborough
Gamer Girl
Gamer Girl
I believe it will come out
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
Rewind or Die
Rewind or Die
Played April 28th

Puppet combo Is a hack and makes the most unfun games imaginable
Pedestal
Pedestal
Played 29th feb 2024

she killed her self. or not. its so #funny and #crazey when girls jump off roofs. apathy is the best approach to this situation. after all why should i distrust someone with such a strong hand on the pulse of the mentally disturbed. YOU go crazy.
The Visitor
The Visitor
Played may 21st:

That boy got lost in the woods and his dad did not care. Wife makes dinner and BECOMES dinner! Shit eating kid gets served, what a fail.... jpg of old woman.... jpg of troll.....
Yono and the Celestial Elephants
Yono and the Celestial Elephants
Dead Dreams
Dead Dreams
Played october 20th

jeff exhaustion. jeff nialhism. all these glicthes and errors. Shes the irate gamer.
Livestream 2: Escape from Togaezuka Happy Place
Livestream 2: Escape from Togaezuka Happy Place
Last Seen Online
Last Seen Online
April 24 2024

Reminds me of hypnospace, very darling passion project
Buff Imposter
Buff Imposter
Hilda wanted this on the list, not me

Player april 29th:
Clipped out of bounds, failed milk pick up. Game is nothing
Hansel & Gretel
Hansel & Gretel
What the fuck is this

Played may 24th:

Oouuuuuuuhh oouuuhhhhh nooooooo.... noooooooooo.....
Kidnapped Girl
Kidnapped Girl
Played April 25th:
I don't know why I keep putting these here. They're not even funny.
My Dear Brother Jeff
My Dear Brother Jeff
Played october 20th

my dear brother jeff you were in a hospital. Many laughs at your expense, tearfully tearing eyes away from boobs to finish your game. the struggles i had trying to make hilda finish this. the desperate search for distraction. jajaja

An amendment:
Finally we can understand the story of Jeffrey dahmer the killer. His mommy go crazy and is no importance. Go away. Less boobs this time but more bad words and a slur
Please Answer Carefully
Please Answer Carefully
♡♡MY PXSSY IN BIO♡♡
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Found on switch store. Looks incomprehensible.

Played April 4th:
This game appears to be overly "girly" and cute but then the main character has skimpy anime clothes and breast physics. It's a bit sad cause it could of been something.
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
The Tongue of Doge
The Tongue of Doge
Townlore
Townlore
Dec 10th

This is my favorite game!
Venge
Venge
Played october 10th

I fell asleep but it was so short that when i woke up i didnt know where i was and i hallucinated hilda still playing but she wasnt actually
Pop Plus: Solo
Pop Plus: Solo
Played at a date

Apparently someone went on a solo bubble adventure and now i will never know. what is it? the bubble. the popping.
Mario: The Music Box Remastered
Mario: The Music Box Remastered
Played august 12:

If the protagonist was anything but mario this would be an average rpgmaker game but watching my friend mario break his back in a fall down a pit and choke on his own blood left me speechless. There is nothing in this game that pertains to mario outside of his appearance. Why would you want to hurt mario? He is so nice and can jump really high and has 3 lives and love for everyone and you hurt him? A lot? Concerned.
Good Job!
Good Job!
Played october 11th

oh my lady, clantly boobed. Unfortunately, was your voice not annoyin. how sad.
Mario In Clock Town
Mario In Clock Town
Played april 30th:

This made me appreciate the enemy placement of normal mario a lot more

53 Comments


can't wait!!

now i feel inspired to do the same with CURSE ..... if i don't make the list... know it is happening slowly but surely

1 year ago

I'M NOT PLAYING FUCKING ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS
@Hilda what could possibly be bad about chipwrecked!!!!!
it's a ??rhythm game??? can you play with DDR pad?
it'll be fun!
Dead By Daylight and the Arthur game being added feel so mean spirited

1 year ago

I'd love to see that list but regardless I'm keeping him in my thoughts and prayers <3 but it would be very funny if you also made him play floigan bros. Although,, Hilda is my online friend so it's acceptable to spam her 24/7 with floigan threats, however I would be worried about the repercussions if I lived with them :P

1 year ago

@BEAUTIFULBRUTE Maybe someday I can convince myself to play it when I buy an adapter for my ddr pad that for my own sake hopefully doesn't work anymore
@BlazingWaters I spent years of my life in dead by daylight but some people would rather see me fall in the hole I climbed out of for so long

1 year ago

@BlazingWaters this is enrichment for Hildas (:

1 year ago

@CURSE she made it through frogger... she's trained to experience Arthur
It's funny 'cause the first three games seem at the bare minimun very fun, and then the flood gates are opened by Alvin and its friends.

I have no idea what even Mr Tomatos, and frankly, I am VERY scared to know.

1 year ago

@DemonAndGames the first 3 are some of my favorite pieces of art that I genuinely wanna show my friend here but the others are just funny lol
@moschidae <3 i understand
@Hilda ahh, well me & moschidae are the new founders of the get-hilda-an-adapter-for-ddr-pad-and-if-that-one-doesn't-work-a-whole-brand-new-one foundation. accepting sponsors

1 year ago

Buying hilda a ddr pad the SECOND I get my disability check next month

1 year ago

Buying myself a dramatically lit chair to sit in

1 year ago

we are fucking sponsored by ms. lemons !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 year ago

that arthuer and the invisibles stream was insane

1 year ago

Shoutout to Wayne, now I don't have to rummage through Wikipedia to find gems like arthur and floigan bros

1 year ago

Water Horse and Charlotte's web forever stuck in my brain. Also found out wikipedia diving that the dudes who founded the studio that made the original Shadowman, dipped and made a new studio, which then made cheap ass games, including Water Horse and Charlotte's web

1 year ago

Oh my god, im actually shocked by that. What a coincidence... Water Horse/Shadowman crossover when..?

Oh yeah, and thank you for reminding me that I need to make Hilda play Babe as well. I'm sure she'll love it (:

1 year ago

This has nothing to do with anything but they're making a Beverley Hills Chihuahua for adult straight men called Strays. i must remember it.

1 year ago

You don’t REALLY have to though…

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and I'll make you watch Strays

1 year ago

I’ll hopefully be catching some instead

1 year ago

Will Feral (changed his name for the movie) is in it. You will watch Strays.

1 year ago

You should add Wo Long I think it'd be kinda fucked up

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and someone is getting locked in the cupboard again ! Or put into a jar.

1 year ago

A worthy sacrifice for a mere cupboard

1 year ago

Does anyone else have any more bad game recommendations that are short-ish. I'm running out of ideas.

1 year ago

How short?

1 year ago

Uhhh like, 2 hours or less preferably
Barbie secret agent because CURS wouldn’t finish it when i tried to make em play even though he almost beat it !!!!!!!


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