July, 2021

30

1h 1m

Started

Zelle spooked the fuck out of me in its first hour before setting itself up to be more atmospheric, but still damn that was spooky. I like the music, very reminiscent of Undertale in texture but different in structure (melodic motivation instead of motifs).
This definitely has things to say about faith and religion. The arbitrary rules set forth by a thoroughly punishing goddess (even lying to you about her gifts) that seem ignored in favor of a second chance while really just using you for their own ends is a harsh critique, and it also goes hand in hand so far with a conversation around suicide. This shit is going to get heavy.
Very curious to see where this goes. It's apparently a short game.

Started

29

1h 1m

Started

Because Arcades are straight up dead in the US, I am emulating the Arcade version. Sue me. RA may have audio bugs but THAT WON'T STOP ME

Mario apparently dies on contact with the ground from like an inch down if they don't jump, and like 3 inches down if they do. Did Mario originally skip leg day?

I might need to watch speedrunners or records but is the best way to rack up points is to complete levels as fast as possible or to continually jump over barrels? Or the hammer? I'm not sure which racks up the most.

Trying to get achievements to work on this thing with RetroArch is insanity, do not do this. Arcade games do not work with RetroArch if you're emulating, stick to MAME or literally anything else. Do NOT be me.

Started

1h 6m

Started

I haven't played this game in years but I like how the tutorial heavily teaches the fundamental buttons and roman cancelling without actually teaching like, actual core shit like how useful a crouching dust attack is or not even teaching specials. I assume there's other tutorials for that but those feel like things you'd want in like, the main tutorial. Apparently nobody speedruns the tutorial but my days of playing Rivals of Aether way too much kicked in and I got the cheevo on the second go, it's actually not that hard.

I got an achievement for fishing that's rad

Started

28

0h 42m

Started

I get the traversal being so stingy is part of how the physics interact with the puzzles, and what gives the challenge, but that doesn't change how awful it FEELS to constantly zig-zag move around or you grind to a halt. So far in the first two levels, it's fine because the areas are small, but it was still annoying to have to go all the way back to smack a checkpoint so I didn't have to repeat progress (why can't there be more checkpoints?).
The music sounded like someone was knocking on my door which ruined my immersion 0/10

Started

0h 48m

Started

Ichabod: "We have to find the murderer amongst us"
tries really hard to hold back laughter

Halfway through Chapter 1 atm.

I never quite understood the people criticizing Telltale for not "honoring decisions" when the strengths of their games rely on telling stories in entertaining QTE/dialogue ways rather than just watching a TV show. Although considering the big fat disclaimer at the beginning saying "YOUR CHOICES MATTER", I can kinda see where they're coming from at the get go, but I'm here for where the story takes me still.

I like the vaguely comic book aesthetic this goes for. It kinda helps some of the designs and the moody noir city really fits, even if the music is more cinematic drama than actual noir music.

Started

27

NES

11h 49m

Started

On my second playthrough to clean up some achievements before Second Quest, time includes my first playthrough as well.

I think the exploring, enemy design for the most part, and combat is still really good. Yes they're tank controls but the enemies are designed around those tank controls. Wizzrobes are still the most infuriating for their high damage output but the sword is not the only weapon in your toolset, and I think people are scared to use non-sword weapons (like the the wand is insanely useful for a while!). I think it's still a satisfying game to play at heart.

Darknuts still terrify me when they're jam packed in a small room with little places to go. Bombs away!
NES

Started

1h 55m

Started

Just finished the Prologue, like past the first day of Day 1?
On replay, the aesthetic is still really nice. I like the CG cutscenes, the music just rockets to attention, and the art is firing on all cylinders.
But man the dialogue.... it does not hit me. The otaku has some REALLY cringe lines, the "ogre" shit and the weird structuring of conversations feels so unnatural, and all the characters start on really bad starts. I don't remember if it gets any better but here's hoping!

Started

0h 56m

Started

This is a really simple but fun Kirby-like before Kirby was even a thing. Everything is really damn cute and I love the designs. The gameplay has a curve and attacking is just one button (and the game doesn't teach you how to change base form), but it's still neat and actually quite frustrating in some sections. But the game is REALLY short, I went through the whole game in 50 minutes.
Ultimate Form is a monstrosity though... and super busted.

Started

25

1h 32m

Started

Drifting is fucking hard in this game I swear to god
Beat pretty much everything on 50cc, getting a comeback from 5th to 1st on the last lap is really hard in this game.
Probably the least amount of leeway for a starting boost

Started

March, 2021

03

3h 8m

Finished

And that makes 100% completion today.
Scrap Brain isn't as bad as Labyrinth Zone but it's close. Pro tip: Go really fucking slow. I know, it sucks, but that is how you beat it. Every single trap feels like it's asking you to rush past it so you miss signposting and get zapped or murdered, and there are blocks that you have to wait to appear. Enemy design isn't nearly as bad as Labyrinth Zone, though, just traps are worse. That being said, having to play through it so slow to function is distressing, if not the antithesis to what the game seemingly wants?
The final boss? No rings. I thankfully got through it unscathed, finding the electric balls easy to react to, and positioning myself so I always had an out. Never got hit once, although asking for the player to never get hit is still asking too much. Made the boss kind of a joke for me, though. If you're impatient, you're dead.

The last three achievements on RetroAchievements were invented by people who felt like abusing the player, at least in my book. Completing Marble Zone in less than 90 seconds is a neat challenge, and actually not that hard to do. The underachiever and 200 rings achievements? Ridiculous. The underachiever asks you to wait 5 minutes in every stage of Green Hill, and have 0 rings when you get there, AND have hit no enemies. Green Hill is already a slightly unfair stage, but now it's completely jacked up, and waiting is painful without speed on emulation. But the 200 rings might be the worst one simply because most stages are in the 210-230 range if they're even close, which means backtracking through each path of a level. I walked out of a stage with only 198 because some were impossible to get in one go, and said fuck it. Time for cheats. I'm not sorry.

24 of 24 achievements.

February, 2021

22

3h 8m

Started

Going to go between short spurts and long ones for this. Green Hill is nice and clearly the best level here, but it still has annoying enemy placement designed to make you stop and reactions that are just too close to perfection required. Getting the best pathway shows how much the physics system and Sonic's movement kinda sucks for slow platforming, being insanely slippery and easy to fall off blocks, best seen in Act 2 and 3 of Green Hill. 4 of 24 retro achievements so far. Managed to net 4 unique checkpoints.

January, 2021

07

-

0h 50m

Started

Played as a Doctor. Party members:
Leader -- Tatsky
Erika
Schredd
Angel
Quil

Quil got cholera. A fire in my wagon destroyed almost all of my bullets, a ton of my food, and a few sets of clothing. Had to restock later. Thankfully only had to hunt 4-5 times (I bought a LOT of food).
Schredd and Erika were bitten by snakes, which I didn't even have to rest for. I did have to rest for Angel's measles, which didn't matter because he got a random fever and died in one night, absolute bullshit.

Fuck impassable trails. Had some spooky guy telling me my wagon was going to blow up or something. Never happened.
Quil got a fever along with Erika getting exhaustion, this time rested immediately. They lived.

Decided to do the river with the rocks and it was the easiest shit ever, I have made the trail with 1760 points! :D

-

Started

01

NES

3h 7m

Started

I have to improvise due to a lack of zapper in my household. This is essentially cheating as it's a mouse, but oh well. I'm not planning on speedrunning, the NES itself is ~$73 I don't have, and the Zapper is ~$34 I also don't have.
It's really hard to perfect C, those discs go fucking fast.
Even harder to perfect 15C aaaaaaaaaaaaaa
NES

Started

December, 2020

08

2h 55m

Started

This game spooks me the fuck out and it has been a struggle just to play one hour of it without at least one person being there over my shoulder or in spirit with VC, which just goes to show how pussy shit I am for anything horror with video games. I'd rather watch this and not be scared, having a controller in my hand frightens me to no other level

The voice acting is kinda scuffed but it's fine tbh.

Music TOP TIER but I already knew that. You hang out in any VGM community you're going to hear this soundtrack 100 times and all I have to say is that it fucks and is a vibe.
The sound outside the music? Freaks me the fuck out. The screams from the enemies when you hit them freaks me out, it sounds like women screaming from torture or something. The crawlers too, got fucking jump scared from a van one. And they move so FAST aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAA

Some kid stepped on my hand and kicked a key away what a M E A N I E

WHAT THE FUCK touched James' hand through that hole, WHAT THE FUCK. My controller vibrated I DON'T LIKE THIS

Pyramid head on the other side of the bars is just staring at me can I file a restraining order before I get to him

The first puzzle was neat! It was easy as soon as I figured out what the names meant, but that's half the battle imo.

Did Eddie kill a guy? Is he just a nervous big guy? O.O

That moment with Angela and the knife was weird as fuck.

2nd puzzle with the safe was easy sauce. Third puzzle wasn't so easy, took me a bit to realize it wanted the coins.

Everyone in Silent Hill is totally normal and did absolutely nothing wrong :)

Pyramid Head boss fight was... something. I didn't get hit once because I stayed away the whole time and just shot at him.

The game is becoming less scary and more of a vibe, but the sound design still gets me spooked. I have trouble going around corners when I hear the radio freak out

I met Maria and all I have to say is..... huh.
"Don't I look like Mary" O.O

The escort isn't bad. Most enemies have attacked me first anyway instead of her, and a lot are becoming really easy since I've collected so many bullets.

Music for Bowl-O-Rama? Woke. Heaven's Night? Bespoke. Stayed there for longer because it's so damn good.

Oh shit James is a drunkard

Yes James chase that girl who seems to know more about you than yourself into that abandoned looking hospital. Surely nothing will go wrong.

Started

01

18h 17m

Finished

Gerudo stealth was boring, and I tanked most of the hits against the minibosses save for the one that's untankable which is uh.... interesting.
Kinda weird how Link has to restore the Gerudo liking men by showing his battle skills, what the fuck Nintendo
Horseback archery made me miss the 3DS port god some of the horseback controls were fucked on N64

I've gotten to the point where I have enough magic equipment that the Eye of Truth using magic makes sense, but it came so late, whereas in the Shadow Temple you use magic so infrequently it's just... there
I want to know if anybody who has played OoT has ever used Nayru's Love, and if so was it remotely worth it, because to me it seemed like filler

I think the Spirit Temple is pretty well designed, probably my 2nd fav dungeon of the game? I like its puzzles, it probably has the best puzzles of the entire game. It also doesn't use the past-future gimmick in as an annoying way as I expected it to be, but I'm also disappointed by what it wasn't
I wish some of the puzzles weren't so cheesable (one of the Anubis puzzles you can literally just shoot fire arrows, they should've made that not a thing)
The dungeon is also better paced than Forest Temple, since that one had more pacebreakers
The new enemies were also more interesting save for Iron Knuckle which is just a pleb filter
Twinrova is more waiting game.... but the dialogue at the end was hilarious. SOUL

Always a reminder that the Skulltulas are not worth collecting past 50, just ignore them at that point they're not worth it, being rich means nothing except being able to buy more Blue Potions

The Gerudo Training Grounds are neat challenges, but the aesthetic being so schizophrenic doesn't fit and it feels the most cobbled together of all the dungeons. I also never used the Ice Arrows

Ganon's Castle is aesthetically better... kinda. It's so drab and bleak on the base floor, and the puzzles themselves are really bleh and just ask for as much item usage as possible, as opposed to being challenging. I do love Ganon fucking killing the organ once you get past the base floor, though. The climb up is probably the best part because it's just setpieces
Ganondorf boss fight really showcases a thing synonymous with all of OoT: the sound design is really good. I love the crackle of getting hit by the ball, and all his moves. The fight itself is kind of a joke in terms of just being tennis fighting and shooting arrows, with the only challenge being from one mistake being SUFFERING...

Unless you got the defense upgrade, the most broken upgrade in all of the game and should've instead been an Easy Mode thing

Ganon fight is piss easy but I was soying out to the aesthetic, god the fucking lighting and him just towering over you, it was SO GOOD

The credits were really soulful too, I liked the credits a lot

Gerudo Valley music? Fucks. Spirit Temple music? Incredibly fitting. Ganon's Castle is also great, same with Ganondorf Battle and Last Battle. All great tunes.
End Credits is really damn good too

Finished

November, 2020

10

18h 17m

Started

Why are the text boxes so SLOW?!? I honestly don't remember them being this slow. Maybe I'm too used to 3D where they're super fast.
The title theme, first forest area music, deku tree dungeon music is still top tier. Especially the title theme, I actually let it play the whole way through before starting. :D
Still getting used to N64 controls again. Almost took a hit from the easiest boss in the game just because I hit the wrong button for shield like a dummy.

Started

August, 2020

June, 2020