If this were a game not made by Remedy, I'd call it wack and somewhat boring. However, this game was made by Remedy, so it was good.

But, like, that's it. It was good. Control is probably Remedy's weakest game so far to me. It's still a compliment to say it, cause that means... you get it. I don't need to spell it out.

Obtuse storytelling is what Sam Lake eats for breakfast. The devs love that stuff. This is a tough task, cause you still want to keep your players interested and not tune out after 5 seconds of hearing someone speak what is essentially alphabet soup. Thankfully, if you can't follow through with the main story, you at least got these wonderful tidbits named "documents". Side stories and layman's terms explanations of the world of The Oldest House keep you wanting for more. Characters, while some of them a bit bland, still fit together to form a squad of oddballs.

Gameplay is hit and miss at the same time. Some fights feel good, some fights don't. It's weird. At some points, I do lots of efficient damage to enemies by using my entire arsenal at them and, at times, I feel like I'm just dealing chip damage when I'm throwing everything but the kitchen sink at them. Combat loop is good, but the lackluster feel of being consistent makes for very confusing progression and made me think that I just needed to do more side quests, only to resume the main path and just laying waste on everything in my path in a button press.

Big drawback is the whole crafting system. It's not necessary, we didn't need it. If there's one thing I don't want in my video game is a crafting system, no matter how shallow it is. There are better ways to offer upgrades and items, and the game already was doing that.

Game looked great with RTX. One of the rare experiences where I'd actually recommend putting it on.

Control 2's eventually happening. Alan Wake 2 has been out for half a year. With what I've seen, Remedy isn't anywhere close to dropping the ball. Bless those guys.


Honestly, I don't have too much to say about this. If you come to this after reading my Kiwami 1 review, I've complained a lot about the fights. Kiwami 2's fighting is pretty different, for the better. I liked it. It's a bit wonky, but nothing I'd actually attribute it to being a problem. Guns were super nerfed though, that's funny.

Story was good. There were quite some moments where I shouted out loud "No Way". I enjoyed myself and smiled through till the end. And then Haruka forced me to play Baseball a whole bunch before proceeding with the story.

There isn't a game out there that's funnier than this one.

I find it funny that I can review doom wads in a website like this, but don't be fooled: This WAD is a full length doom mod. A game of its own, if you will.

Eviternity is a product of love for all things DOOM. Its ambitions and technical prowess are nothing like we've seen in a DOOM engine game, but is it better than DOOM?

No, but that's not the point of Eviternity.

I played this wad on Ultra-Violence. I'm not as well versed in DOOM as its devoted fans, but I do know a thing or two about how to play DOOM. Of course, as a result, I've been humbled. Eviternity presents itself as more or less a "fight by fight" mod, or in other words, you're going to feel like you're fighting in arenas more than you're going to feel like exploring an entire map while encountering enemies along the way. It's a question of pacing and also a question of preference. I'm not in the camp of doing arena fights, but I still enjoyed what was given. These fights are hard, and I've tried my damnedest best to not save on every encounter. Some of these fights (thankfully not too many), I'm sorry, are kind of bullshit.

See, Eviternity adds a few new enemies (as well as modify some base game ones as well). One of these enemies is the "Annihilator", which is a Hell Demon, but Cyber. It shoots missiles and also chainguns people to death harder than Chaingunners do, and that's saying something. I hate to say it, but these enemies are terribly designed. They're frustrating to deal with, they have a high amount of damage output AND they have a lot of health. They're also put in many scenarios where the player can easily get owned by them. They are simply not fun. The astral beings from Out There, In The Universe, told me that they are changed in the sequel for the better.

Speaking of Chaingunners, some map makers really, really like the idea of adding to the difficulty of a map by adding as many as possible. Some of the fights obviously had the process of "Hmm, this is a bit easy, actually. How should I make this harder?" to which the answer is, of course, chaingunners. Call it a nitpick, I call it a disappointment. These are not the kinds of enemies to place around to make fights harder in a good way.

Alright, I've got my complaints about this game out of the way.

This mod is fucking beautiful. Holy shit. The music accompanies it very well, the Capital A Architecture on some of these levels is impressive. These people went above and beyond for what's expected in a DOOM wad when it comes to visuals. It's a full fledged journey. I'd stop and wander around after fights, just gushing about looking at the set pieces. You could play this in no-monsters mode and have an outstanding walking simulator to enjoy. There is a story in Eviternity, but it would rather just show you the environments than tell the story because it's just more important and efficient that way, anyway.

Difficulties are well adjusted as well. I did a quick look on the easier modes and they should be a good start for people who aren't as good at DOOM, but still want to experience a new, full length DOOM game.

Far Harbor was the one DLC for Fallout 4 that I bothered playing. If you read my Fallout 4 review, you might know why.

I'll be short and quick with this one, because Far Harbor's only discussable quirks unique from the base game are its writing and - sort of - gameplay aspects.

Let's get this out of the way: The writing is far more bearable in this DLC. You get your usual factions who all have their reasons to conquer the land of lots-o'-fog. For once, however, you get CHOICES where YOU can INFLUENCE factions on how this situation should be DEALT WITH. Crazy, I know! The story didn't feel like a slog and I guess I didn't hate its characters. Whew.

Gameplay-wise, we have a few novelties. First is the elephant in the room, the "workshop" mini-game. If you know, you know. It was such a breath of fresh air, but it all came crashing down with a very unintuitive system. It was awesome, until it wasn't. Damn shame. I was ready to quit after round 3.

There are some new weapons, but I didn't bother with them. I didn't bother with them because I knew they wouldn't do nearly as much damage as my current non-legendary weaponry. It's nice to give more shooty things, but it would have been nicer to have these shooty things do something new to freshen up the room.

In the end, this was just fine. I'm glad they didn't fuck something up, at least.

This is the first ever Bethesda (First Party) game I've completed. If you don't know what that means: It's a fucking tall order, and the obstacles were certainly there. Innumerable are the times I'd start a playthrough of their previous games; Fallout 3, any Elder Scrolls, but not Starfield. I'm not playing Starfield. Every attempt at a playthrough was met with a Toy Story esque ending: I leave my toys behind, never to be played again, or unearth one for a few minutes, only to give it back to the forgotten.

Fallout 4 is painful. It's a game that, once again with Bethesda, they do not get it. The writing is ass, the gameplay systems are wonky at best and the stability is as bad as my ADD-addled goldfish memory. "It just works" is a stretch, but it's still the truth. The painfulness of Fallout 3 radiates (hah) through 4, with its forceful decision making and RPG mechanics that dumb down what could make the game enjoyable. Dare I mention New Vegas here? I just did: It's inevitable to do the comparison. The adopted brother is doing much, much better at school than you are, 4.

But I'm not ultimately here to compare with New Vegas. I'm here to assess Fallout 4 as is. As is, being, that I did not install a single mod on it, not even performance enhancers. Bethesda shipped a game, and I shall play it. Simple as. Was it regretful, that I refused to modify my game so that it wouldn't crash or softlock on silly occasions? No. I knew it was just part of the Bethesda experience. I was prepared for it.

I will, however, go back on my word to say that I will compare this game with Fallout 3, as it is impossible to review Fallout 4 without mentioning Fallout 3 if you've played Fallout 3 already, even if it is but an inch of it, like I did.

Let's start with Fallout's loved(?) RPG system: It's a mess. Bethesda really thought that simplifying the stats and perks to be melded together would make gameplay more enjoyable. I don't know who's smoking what, but it stinks bad. It's a system that warrants less importance to stats while... increasing... stats. More of the same ol' is provided to you: Would you like a crumb of increased damage? Of course, you can vary your gameplay: Simply increase your damage output for a certain weapon type of choice by a slight percentage. That's variety, right? My character is now raised as a damage dealer, rather than be a damage dealer, or perhaps even a damage dealer, maybe with a side of "I pay less at shops now". Fallout 3 did that, too, by having both stats and perks assigned to dealing more damage. Instead of dealing with two types of points systems to further increase your DPS, you get one. How innovative. Oh, but there's more than just combat for these perks, right? You get to put points on being able to craft more damage dealers, or perhaps bypass certain points of the game so you can get to deal damage earlier. Oh, but what about those "unique" weapons, which cannot be scrapped but they do more damage! I'm feeling the variety on this game, oh my! I'm oversimplifying my explanation of the problem, but I guess that makes two of us, now.

How about the writing? I'm sure Bethesda learned from their problems with assigning threads of fate to your main character, right? Nah, it's still there. My playthrough was intended to be "Just this person looking for their son, while avoiding unnecessary trouble", but of course, it's the wasteland: You're expected to run into trouble. But what about trouble that you could, you know, prevent by yourself, by decisions that only you could affect? Perhaps you know where I'm going with this if you've played this game already. This review is as spoiler free as I'll try. I might spoil a few things, but I'll serve these as warnings for what you might get into, if you wanted to play the game for yourself.

Factions are, once again from 3, single minded. The one track mind is the easiest track mind to write when you can let the bigger mind do the tracking (that's you). Factions are resolute and unyielding. If they have an opinion, you're not talking them down on it. Diplomacy is never the option. You start the game learning about the Minutemen, who are just kinda there because they want to protect and, uh, serve, I guess. They're like an NCR lite, they just aren't big enough to become the NCR yet. Then, you got the Brotherhood of Steel. Oh hell yeah, the Brotherhood of Steel! The guys you see on the box art! They're so cool and prevalent within the Fallout lore! I can't wait to... reads script be very racist with them? Go listen to what the important and nonimportant NPCs have to say, it's the only thing on their mind. Also, you've heard the meme about the Minutemen wanting you to go save a settlement for the nth time, right? The Brotherhood of Steel are ten times worse, oh my fucking god. Then you have the Railroad, who try to be secretive but fail massively and are here to be Understood or Misunderstood, no middle ground.

At last, there's the Institute. Again, this is a spoiler free review, so I can't say much about them. They're the boogeymen who kidnap people, or whatever. It doesn't seem to happen under your watch, so they're very mysterious. I will be honest and say that pre-discovery of what the Institute is, they were a good source of motivation of going through the game. After that, well...

Much like Fallout 3, the writing is a case of Yes vs. No. Do you want to do this thing and not add your own ideological nuance to it? Go ahead, Fallout 4 is great at doing that. Just do what's told in your path, and I'm sure you'll do just fine. Pick your favorite faction and listen, don't debate.

Ah, but what about the gameplay? It's surprisingly easy to be extremely overpowered. I have, mind you, completed one DLC story mid-playthrough, which has made me very, very strong, with big weapons and increased levels (not that that has done much). By the time that happened, I was getting bored really quick, and playing anything other than the main story has become more and more of a chore. The loop is ultimately stale. At the beginning of the game, you do get a great sequence of events, teaching you the things you can do, like handle settlements, have companions and dealing with Power Suits. I've done one of those things (it's the Power Suits) eventually and, other than requirements for some quests, handled settlements. Initially, it felt like a good gameplay loop: Explore, scavenge, fight, settle. It had more or less one more point in the loop than 3's, so that meant the game had a bit more variety put into it! Eventually, you realize that it's extremely optional and optimizing settlements doesn't lead anywhere storyline-wise. If you like to craft and manage these settlements, I'm obliged to tell you that the functions for that are frustrating at times, but still functional enough that you can have some fun with it. It's not my cup of tea, but I know it'd be a delicious cup for some. And so, we're back at the tediousness of Fallout's open world loop: Explore, scavenge, fight. It gets tiresome fast and, without any very remarkable landmarks, you tend to forego the exploration part of the game and, once you get very strong (and you will), you will want to forego scavenging. Where does that leave us?

Also, for some reason, the devs really wanted to make your character go through a slight cutscene if you ever wanted to handle a computer. It wasn't like that with the other games, so why here? You don't even do a funny slow walk to a door if you wanted to pick one, so why only computers? Why am I being pissy about it? It's because I softlocked at least a number of times equal to double digits because of that decision. (<-) Sarcasm: It's great for making you want to play more of the game. Oh, and the occasional game crashes, too. That was to be expected. Thank god for the decently implemented auto-save feature.

Fallout 4 is a game that I've had to fortify my resolve to, at the very least, beat it. I made it my goal to play nothing but that until I got to the end of one playthrough, lest I open another game and send the toy to the box at the end of the storage room. It's a sign that Bethesda will never learn, but we never know, maybe they will with their next iteration... which is what I would never had said, even pre-76, and we all know what happened with that game.

The best way I could describe this game is "EVE Online, but anyone can join in at any time".

Puzzle Pirates is (I'll be honest, i should be using "was" here) an MMO from the aughts that did Pirate gameplay right. As the title suggests, the gameplay is all puzzles. You don't have stats or anything of the sort: you have you, yourself, and your brain to Explore, Battle and Barter.

As a new swabbie, your goal is to help other crews sail the Seven Seas, attending to different stations to maintain the ship. From when the anchors raise, teamwork is on full power. As a captain, you have to direct your ship and crew as you sail and fight other ships. Everything that happens in your ship melds together to form the core Puzzle Pirates gameplay, and it works marvelously.

The puzzles will kick your ass, however. The rating system is unforgiving: you feel like you can do fine, but the game doesn't think you're stylish: Just doing the puzzles isn't enough, you need to perform combos, complete sequences quickly and not waste too many turns. The puzzle truly starts when you have to think of the optimal way to complete it. After decades of playing this game on and off, I still can't do it right on some of the stations.

Should you not want to do all that ship stuff, you can always live the life of a magnate, owning a shop, perform jobs in a bustling city... if you can find a deed to a building, of course. There's an entire fleshed out market out there, and you can make lots of money that way.

Speaking of money, Puzzle Pirates also has one of the best monetary systems I've seen in a free to play game. Doubloons are what's considered a payable currency: You can buy a bunch of them for a decent price, or you can farm just a bit from jobs (it's really not that long) to get a good amount. Doubloons are how you get temporary badges that let you do more things in the game. There's not much in the game that forces you to buy doubloons, if at all.

Today, this game's servers are still running. However, the number of players at any time can easily turn your head away. Puzzle Pirates has become niche, and its heydays are long gone. You can still play and experience a decent amount of content, but it's the best when you're with a full crew of players.

I am not kidding when I am saying this: Grey Havens, if you are reading this, I want to see a Puzzle Pirates 2. Hell, I want to make a Puzzle Pirates 2. Let's make it happen.

Not explaining shit. Game of all time. Shoutouts to the Dreamcast.

this game throws curveballs like a baby throws tantrums

Amid Evil was my 2019 Game of the Year. When the DLC got announced, I was pumped! It released right as I was going to Japan for a while so I couldn't get to play it until now.

Amid Evil is a fantastic shooter that invites you to a banquet of aesthetic mechanics, that is to say: It is not how you kill your enemies, it is how you overkill them. This simple mechanic means that your weapons utterly decimates your enemies in different ways, and my god does it feel good. Black Labyrinth wonderfully replaces two of the original game's weapons with fists, replacing the axe, and a scythe, replacing this game's version of the BFG. Both of these weapons are awesome, and I'd actually say that I'd rather them than the axe and aeturnum.

Another aspect of Amid Evil that I loved was the overall design: Every level looks beautiful, weapons look and sound (the good kind of) crispy and gameplay is fast paced, but will let you go at your own pace if you want to walk around to check out the environments. I am pleased to share with you that The Black Labyrinth does more of that. It's not home to my most favorite levels (save for one, that made me go "oooooooh" out loud), but they're delicious nonetheless.

The final boss is a bit silly, but I dig it. Won't go further than that. Experience it for yourself.

Black Labyrinth was a long time coming. It's been stuck in my steam wishlist for a while, waiting for it to release. Thankfully, it's been worth the wait, even if it's a bit on the short side. I don't care, cause I took my time enjoying it.

This review contains spoilers

Ever wanted to give Aerith that god damn phoenix down? Yeah? Fuck you.

Let's make a game about changing fate, or destiny, or whatever, because I guess people want the final fantasy 7 story to change. The story that's been loved by countless amounts of people, the story that shaped the future of RPGs. Square was at its golden age, and they are chasing that age again. Why shouldn't they? Everyone wanted a remake: And so they did.

Final Fantasy 7 Remake is many games. It's so many games. Final Fantasy 7's remake is to Sonic's 06. Final Fantasy 7's remake is to Yakuza's Kiwami. Final Fantasy 7's remake is to... wait, 3 games? You need 3 games to tell the epic of Final Fantasy 7, or I guess, retell it? Augh. What a slog. Oh my god, it's a slog. It's slow, it's boring, I didn't care. But why didn't I care?

Final Fantasy 7's remake is to Sonic's 06: A world of fantasy meets the future. Every notion you knew about JRPGs are new. You are given a narrative you've never seen before. Should you have played the previous Final Fantasies and cared, cried or screamed to them, you would never know that it could possibly get any more better, or crazier, or be as grand as it can be. Popping that PS1 disc for the first time must have been life changing for some. I wouldn't know, I wasn't part of the world who experienced FF7 on launch. However, the echoes of its fans are heard loud and clear anywhere you go on the internet. That is to say: Even if you haven't played FF7, you know FF7. Whether you liked or hated it, the story moved so many souls in the world.

Now tell me, has remake moved you? Has the first part told you "you're in for a wild ride"? Look at me right in the eye and say you're hyped. Cause I'm not. Having to go through, what, a third of the original game in a full length story means everything's paced differently, and I don't mind slow pacing. The problem is with its characters. I don't care about them. Every time I had to look at an NPC, I had to sigh over how boring they looked. Every time I had to listen to a character talked, I had to roll my eyes over the conversations they were having. I felt no need to care for some of the most menial writing I had to suffer through while playing this game. I went for the side quests, as much as I could, but I couldn't handle it anymore. NPCs, characters, whatever, I just couldn't get myself to care for. I had to take care of their problems, whatever they were. However, I needed a very emotionless boy to tell them how disinterested they were to it all, or that they needed to pay for their troubles to be solved. I was doing chores, not side quests. I was, in the end, speaking to Sonic 06 NPCs. If they didn't have voice acting, just going "'eyy", I'd feel much more at ease taking care of some nobody's problems. However, I had to take my time to listen to their mild woes, shut my brain off, and do the chores.

Ah, wait, this is just about side quests. Well, nah, I didn't care for most of the main cast either. I liked Barrett, of course. I wanted to see him get through his troubles, no matter how densely headstrong he was.

...Uh, that was it. I didn't care for the rest of the main cast. Cloud's emotionless, and I'm supposed to cheer for him whenever he shows a bit of emotion. Aerith and Tifa feel like they're just side-to-side with Cloud to share good moments with him, so that he opens up. Red XIII doesn't appear until the very end of the game, so I can't say much. Shoutouts to Wedge, who, despite being endearing, still kinda sucks. At least he's trying, I guess. Man, these characters just felt... forced. I am supposed to care about them: they're the Final Fantasy 7 cast! Make it an epic, give them reasons to make the player care, no matter what. I hate it!

Final Fantasy 7's Remake is to Yakuza's Kiwami: Oh, this is a weird one, huh? They're both remakes, obviously. They got a fresh coat of paint. This one would make more sense than the Sonic 06 part (which I admittedly just couldn't bear and it's my biggest complaint about the game, so I went full cynical mode on it). Its gameplay is... fine. It works, I can't give it a stink eye. Making it an action RPG rather than a turn-based one is just a result of modernizing video games. Big whoop, I want to see more turn based RPGs, but I won't get it with FF7 Remake. I have nothing bad to say about this. Except for maybe one thing: Some fights feel like shit. It's another case of the bulletproof vest, like with my Kiwami review. It's not as bad, but I felt some facsimiles of needing certain resistances to not get thoroughly fucked on certain fights. Again, it's not as bad, but I couldn't help but remember getting shot at as Kiryu and going "ah come on man". Same thing with Cloud not getting the time of day against certain enemies.

So, there it is. Final Fantasy 7 Remake is kinda doodoo. The story and characters are a fucking plague in my mind, but the gameplay is fine. Fans apparently want a redo of the whole story they loved so much. What happens at the end of the third game? What if it's not up to snuff? What if it doesn't equal the universal hype? What a herculean task Square Enix took by remaking Final Fantasy 7. They have the blueprints, most we can do is wait and see where it goes. Me? I'll still probably follow this series cause, I don't know, the whispers are forcing me to face my destiny: I gotta play through this fucking story. Despite all my cynicism, I've fallen for the trap of sunken cost fallacy once more. I'll buckle up while I'm at it.

Anyways, Final Fantasy 8 deserved a remake more than 7. Fuck you.

A very OK game, I guess.

A friend described it to me the best: It's a souped up flash game. Derogatory sentiments aside, the mechanics for the most part are fun: The whole point of this game is to feel like a badass, and you most certainly can be a badass. An increasingly deadly arsenal is given to you throughout the game (you get the last weapon like, 4/5ths of the way through), which keeps gameplay fresh enough to not bore you and close the game half way through the story, if you can call it that.

My main gripe is that there is aim assist in this game, and it's extremely helpful. So helpful that it prevents me from properly aiming in certain situations, which leads me to unavoidable damage. As far as I've checked, there's no way to turn it off. It's pretty frustrating, not gonna lie.

This was in my backlog since the game's release, lol. If I felt any hype for this, I might have felt disappointed by this game.

2018

Beat this in one sitting. It's rare that I actually do that when it comes to video games, so it shows how good this game is. All of the weapons feel super good to use, enemies are varied and fun to fight and the levels aren't a drag to go through. It's one of those games where "nothing is wrong", but perhaps it's missing this sort of... oomph, that would make it so much more fun to me.

I tend to use the word "oomph" a lot when reviewing things. It's the one word I rely on too much, but there's no better way to convey what I feel when it comes to describing a certain je-ne-sais-quoi that would make a game super duper good. This game has some of that special "oomph" I am looking for, but it's missing in some places. Perhaps it's the art direction and where this game takes place in that bores me a bit. I'm being harsh. This game is good. Go play it.

I've played this quite a while ago. This year, I came back to play it once more, whether I remember the cases or not (spoilers: I remembered them in their entirety). However, I never actually played case 5 this whole time. I don't know why, but I didn't.

So I played it.

It's interesting to call case 5 the peak of the game. Compared to the other games' peak cases - Which I will go through eventually, again. I've played them too - it's kind of, I don't know, alright? I think the general consensus about the first ace attorney is that this game paves the way for its sequels, and that is very much correct. I don't think I have much more to say about this game that hasn't been said before. If you like this game, you play the other ones. If you didn't like this game: Play the other ones anyways, I promise you they're a ride and a half.

In the gaming era where 3D worlds are still being studied and understood by the top dogs of the industry, people were subject to very inventive and, well, borderline insane game design. Thankfully, Mega Man Legends lands snugly on the inventive side.

This game has this weird tank/platforming control scheme that, in the hands of a new player, would be confusing to pick up. However, once it's understood, mastering the controls makes you feel invincible. It feels good!

This game is surprisingly short, perhaps the pacing has something to do with it. There's (nearly) a full story being told here, but the side content is far and few between, that is, if you can find it. Characters are all lovely in their own way and the cutscenes are entertaining. Perhaps its sequel enhances on everything it did well, and then some. I wouldn't know, I haven't played it yet.