Temmoes
2019
The words "tree simulator 2020" and "unrivalled kino" are actually synonyms in the Oxford English dictionary.
When I opened "tree simulator 2020", my eyes were blessed with the greatest graphics known to man. My room was lit up with the amber glow of the gorgeous American sunrise on a sturdy poplar evergreen.
When I say you could get 1000+ hours of gameplay out of this, it's a damn understatement. You would have to be a fool to underestimate the cultural impact "tree simulator" will have on society as a whole for years to come.
This is the ideal video game. No liberal "people" of color, "woke" politics, nasty feminist agenda or leftist commie rhetoric. Just mother nature, as the one true Christian god intended.
When I opened "tree simulator 2020", my eyes were blessed with the greatest graphics known to man. My room was lit up with the amber glow of the gorgeous American sunrise on a sturdy poplar evergreen.
When I say you could get 1000+ hours of gameplay out of this, it's a damn understatement. You would have to be a fool to underestimate the cultural impact "tree simulator" will have on society as a whole for years to come.
This is the ideal video game. No liberal "people" of color, "woke" politics, nasty feminist agenda or leftist commie rhetoric. Just mother nature, as the one true Christian god intended.
2017
This review contains spoilers
In the year I came back to my home town, my sister was born.
Most of the friends that I had forgot about me, and what seemed so familiar as a child was now alien. The bus route changed. A new McDonald's opened near my house, and a giant condominium blocked my childhood home's view of the ocean.
The sky was more grey than I remember.
This year I turn 20.
I'm every bit as directionless, confused and angry as I was seven years ago.
I think night in the woods struck a chord with me because of this. When I visit possum springs, it reminds me of when I was 12, in a place that was familiar and different. For me, it's hauntingly nostalgic, and reminded me of a time that I miss dearly.
---
Stuff I liked
---
The pit-a-pat of a pretty bad matte black cat's paws on the roof approaching a rat clad in a snug shrug is interrupted with intermittent grunts of effort.
The sound of everything, from the crunch of autumn leaves, the rubber-like twang of power lines, and sizzling of fresh pierogis.
The echoes of delinquent chatter reverberate throughout an abandoned subway. The scuttling of pets and other small rats (children) overlap with the sound of a sputtering engine of an ancient vehicle in desperate need of repair, a car and driver in no hurry to reach their destination. It's a small town after all.
The soundtrack is soft, the humming of the theramin and synth mimicking the whistle of a chilly autumn breeze. It feels like a lullaby. It's calm. Eerily so. But it feels comforting in its own silly, off-kilter way.
These noises go a long way to making you feel like you're there. It does wonders for the atmosphere of this unknown small town in the middle of nowhere. Historical possum springs. It feels cozy. It feels familiar.
Mae's dynamic demeanors are expressed in the smooth animations of actions and reactions to scenarios and inputs. Each character's body language tells you just enough about each person to know at least a little of what they're like.
The paper cutout feel of the art style makes the game feel homely. Like a children's book. The (smooth?) feeling of it's presentation matches it's wiggly and slick character animations.
It's easy on the eyes.
There's also something about the writing in Night in the woods that makes the world feel lived in. Dialogue feels like something me and my friends would say. An awkward slip of the tongue might inadvertently make another panic. Infuriating passive aggressive back and forths eventually explode into a heartbreaking argument. Poems by selmers. It feels real.
There's attention to detail in every offhanded comment. Fragments of stories of the town's inhabitants and escapades are drip fed to you via Mae's recollections and interactions with random objects in town, big events in the past alluded to throughout the game for you to figure out. Where everybody knows everyone. In possum springs, word gets around.
---
Mild Spoilers
---
Night in the woods is a game about mourning. It's about mourning a loved one, a childhood that left a long time ago, a town that used to thrive, now a shambling corpse of what it once was, a toxic cesspool of broken dreams. A black hole, sucking up all the ambitions its inhabitants had,and spitting them out the other side, listless. Hopeless. Tired. But in this town of nothing, empty town of no renown, people find solace and comfort with each other. There is love to be found, there are friends to be had, in a hopeless town where few can escape, where everything stays stagnant, frozen in time, while everything else changes. There's something about this game and it's themes that I find hopeful.
At the end of everything, hold on to anything.
There's one aspect of the story that really stuck with me, the feeling of needing to escape. Mae couldn't find her place in university. She felt so out of place, that she sacrificed everything her parents worked for to return home. Bea couldn't leave her borderline abusive household because how could she abandon her family? She couldn't go to college because she was poor, because she was dealt a horrible hand in life. Gregg and Angus are actively trying to escape possum springs to find a better life. It's everywhere, and it feels messy. In the transitory period of entering adulthood, I constantly feel like I need to get away from everything, that the weight of my responsibility as an adult is crushing me. Living is messy.
I'm the same age as Mae now. It's scary. But playing this game, feeling lost and confused, was comforting in a way. Maybe if you feel the same you'll like it too.
Most of the friends that I had forgot about me, and what seemed so familiar as a child was now alien. The bus route changed. A new McDonald's opened near my house, and a giant condominium blocked my childhood home's view of the ocean.
The sky was more grey than I remember.
This year I turn 20.
I'm every bit as directionless, confused and angry as I was seven years ago.
I think night in the woods struck a chord with me because of this. When I visit possum springs, it reminds me of when I was 12, in a place that was familiar and different. For me, it's hauntingly nostalgic, and reminded me of a time that I miss dearly.
---
Stuff I liked
---
The pit-a-pat of a pretty bad matte black cat's paws on the roof approaching a rat clad in a snug shrug is interrupted with intermittent grunts of effort.
The sound of everything, from the crunch of autumn leaves, the rubber-like twang of power lines, and sizzling of fresh pierogis.
The echoes of delinquent chatter reverberate throughout an abandoned subway. The scuttling of pets and other small rats (children) overlap with the sound of a sputtering engine of an ancient vehicle in desperate need of repair, a car and driver in no hurry to reach their destination. It's a small town after all.
The soundtrack is soft, the humming of the theramin and synth mimicking the whistle of a chilly autumn breeze. It feels like a lullaby. It's calm. Eerily so. But it feels comforting in its own silly, off-kilter way.
These noises go a long way to making you feel like you're there. It does wonders for the atmosphere of this unknown small town in the middle of nowhere. Historical possum springs. It feels cozy. It feels familiar.
Mae's dynamic demeanors are expressed in the smooth animations of actions and reactions to scenarios and inputs. Each character's body language tells you just enough about each person to know at least a little of what they're like.
The paper cutout feel of the art style makes the game feel homely. Like a children's book. The (smooth?) feeling of it's presentation matches it's wiggly and slick character animations.
It's easy on the eyes.
There's also something about the writing in Night in the woods that makes the world feel lived in. Dialogue feels like something me and my friends would say. An awkward slip of the tongue might inadvertently make another panic. Infuriating passive aggressive back and forths eventually explode into a heartbreaking argument. Poems by selmers. It feels real.
There's attention to detail in every offhanded comment. Fragments of stories of the town's inhabitants and escapades are drip fed to you via Mae's recollections and interactions with random objects in town, big events in the past alluded to throughout the game for you to figure out. Where everybody knows everyone. In possum springs, word gets around.
---
Mild Spoilers
---
Night in the woods is a game about mourning. It's about mourning a loved one, a childhood that left a long time ago, a town that used to thrive, now a shambling corpse of what it once was, a toxic cesspool of broken dreams. A black hole, sucking up all the ambitions its inhabitants had,and spitting them out the other side, listless. Hopeless. Tired. But in this town of nothing, empty town of no renown, people find solace and comfort with each other. There is love to be found, there are friends to be had, in a hopeless town where few can escape, where everything stays stagnant, frozen in time, while everything else changes. There's something about this game and it's themes that I find hopeful.
At the end of everything, hold on to anything.
There's one aspect of the story that really stuck with me, the feeling of needing to escape. Mae couldn't find her place in university. She felt so out of place, that she sacrificed everything her parents worked for to return home. Bea couldn't leave her borderline abusive household because how could she abandon her family? She couldn't go to college because she was poor, because she was dealt a horrible hand in life. Gregg and Angus are actively trying to escape possum springs to find a better life. It's everywhere, and it feels messy. In the transitory period of entering adulthood, I constantly feel like I need to get away from everything, that the weight of my responsibility as an adult is crushing me. Living is messy.
I'm the same age as Mae now. It's scary. But playing this game, feeling lost and confused, was comforting in a way. Maybe if you feel the same you'll like it too.
2009
Flames crackle in the pale moonlight. They're scattered throughout the city's remains. Patrols of grunts and elites pollute the once bustling streets like a plague.
The whirring of overhead phantoms fill in the brief gaps of silence left by the deafening whisper of the wind.
Hissing, then a click. Your drop pod opens, and you're tossed into the ruins of New Mombasa. You're small. Not the hulking 9 foot master chief, but a humble footsoldier. And you're deep in enemy territory. The only sources of light the dim cerulean glow of the covenant's energy weapons. These aliens tower you in stature. They vastly outclass you in firepower, and their numbers are in the thousands. You're just a rookie with a submachine gun and a dream.
If humanity already lost this fight, what hope do you have?
The next ten hours are then spent conducting a one sided massacre on hundreds of giant aliens.
The whirring of overhead phantoms fill in the brief gaps of silence left by the deafening whisper of the wind.
Hissing, then a click. Your drop pod opens, and you're tossed into the ruins of New Mombasa. You're small. Not the hulking 9 foot master chief, but a humble footsoldier. And you're deep in enemy territory. The only sources of light the dim cerulean glow of the covenant's energy weapons. These aliens tower you in stature. They vastly outclass you in firepower, and their numbers are in the thousands. You're just a rookie with a submachine gun and a dream.
If humanity already lost this fight, what hope do you have?
The next ten hours are then spent conducting a one sided massacre on hundreds of giant aliens.
The average course correction goes something like this:
"Oh you're here!"
Gregson greets the up and coming lawyer, Ryonosuke, his transgender Japanese assistant, a german ace detective, and said detective's adopted doctor-daughter-mother-roommate-child.
"This is the most horrifying murder I've ever seen in my entire life... The victim, poor guy... he was smashed over the head with a blunt object and then pummelled until he approached this sorry state..."
Gregson points toward a bloody mush at the corner of the room. Brains and guts are splattered all over the floor.
"I've never been more disgusted in my entire life."
Gregson follows up this statement by stuffing his face with 30 servings of fried fish.
The 12 year old is still at the crime scene for some reason.
A suspicious figure is seen being interrogated.
"Ah, that's Call Preete, feel free to question him" the officer says.
Herlock takes one glance at the man, and turns around to speak to naruhodo
"We got our guy"
"What? How?"
"Elementary, my dear naruhodo. You see, the man right before you VERY CLEARLY commited a dastardly crime!"
Call Preete jolts, and beads of sweat form on his forehead.
"The crime being... THAT OF POOR TASTE IN LITERATURE!!!"
Mr Preete's expression of fear is quickly replaced by confusion.
"As you can see... The evidence of this is CLEARLY SHOWN on THIS VERY TABLE!!"
Herlock points to a mahogany desk, covered in important documents that seem relevant to the case.
Call pulls his mustache, and it snaps back onto his face, the recoil of which throws him backwards, sending his body careening through multiple brick walls.
Herlock approaches the table, and knocks everything off it. Underneath the clearly useless resources, a magazine.
"As you can see, this table has a CRAPPY MAGAZINE on it. One that RIVALS the publication that my adventures are shown in!"
Herlock chuckles confidently, and Susato's eyes sparkle.
"You've done it again Mr Sholmes!" She exclaims.
Her head snaps toward the accused.
"That's a big fucking deal buster. Grounds for the DEATH penalty."
Naruhodo shakes his head, and prepares to correct the injudicious himbo.
"You see Herlock, you missed out on this key detail."
Naruhodo walks toward Call, and stares intently at his hands. They're completely covered in blood.
Ryonosyke spins around, and his gaze travels towards the unrecognisable fleshy mush of mincemeat in the room.
"Using my powers of observation.... I think this guy might have touched the victim..."
He then approaches the aforementioned wooden desk.
The young lawyer turns 15° to the left of what Herlock was originally looking at, revealing a giant 700 page book covered in blood that just prior was not visible at all from any other angle. The book is also covered in Call's fingerprints, with his name and signature on a receipt sticking out of it.
Ryonnosuke chortles.
"Looks like we caught this guy... read handed...."
Herlock starts violently flailing his arms everywhere.
"Ah yes. I actually thought this the WHOLE TIME. Thank you naruhodo."
Sholmes and Ryonnosuke then start dancing on the crime scene. A job well done.
Call Preete shivers and starts bawling.
"I-I DIDNT DO IT I PROMISE!!!"
"Ok I believe you" Naruhodo replies.
"Oh ok thanks"
Van zieks is also there, and is seen screaming
"I FUCKING HATE JAPANESE PEOPLE!!!!" At the top of his lungs in a drunken stupor.
He smashes a bottle of wine on a nearby Chinese man's head, instantly killing him.
--
Everything I liked about the original trilogy is here in spades. The iconic ost, insane breakdowns, and an interconnected story that seamlessly weaves together the overarching mystery of the two games. And though some of the characters are slightly less iconic than the original, it makes up for it with strong writing and thoroughly engaging mysteries that kept me engrossed in the story throughout it's 70 hour runtime.
I have been listening to "the great turnabout" for months after I completed this game. I have never had more fun playing a visual novel than in the final case of resolve.
"Oh you're here!"
Gregson greets the up and coming lawyer, Ryonosuke, his transgender Japanese assistant, a german ace detective, and said detective's adopted doctor-daughter-mother-roommate-child.
"This is the most horrifying murder I've ever seen in my entire life... The victim, poor guy... he was smashed over the head with a blunt object and then pummelled until he approached this sorry state..."
Gregson points toward a bloody mush at the corner of the room. Brains and guts are splattered all over the floor.
"I've never been more disgusted in my entire life."
Gregson follows up this statement by stuffing his face with 30 servings of fried fish.
The 12 year old is still at the crime scene for some reason.
A suspicious figure is seen being interrogated.
"Ah, that's Call Preete, feel free to question him" the officer says.
Herlock takes one glance at the man, and turns around to speak to naruhodo
"We got our guy"
"What? How?"
"Elementary, my dear naruhodo. You see, the man right before you VERY CLEARLY commited a dastardly crime!"
Call Preete jolts, and beads of sweat form on his forehead.
"The crime being... THAT OF POOR TASTE IN LITERATURE!!!"
Mr Preete's expression of fear is quickly replaced by confusion.
"As you can see... The evidence of this is CLEARLY SHOWN on THIS VERY TABLE!!"
Herlock points to a mahogany desk, covered in important documents that seem relevant to the case.
Call pulls his mustache, and it snaps back onto his face, the recoil of which throws him backwards, sending his body careening through multiple brick walls.
Herlock approaches the table, and knocks everything off it. Underneath the clearly useless resources, a magazine.
"As you can see, this table has a CRAPPY MAGAZINE on it. One that RIVALS the publication that my adventures are shown in!"
Herlock chuckles confidently, and Susato's eyes sparkle.
"You've done it again Mr Sholmes!" She exclaims.
Her head snaps toward the accused.
"That's a big fucking deal buster. Grounds for the DEATH penalty."
Naruhodo shakes his head, and prepares to correct the injudicious himbo.
"You see Herlock, you missed out on this key detail."
Naruhodo walks toward Call, and stares intently at his hands. They're completely covered in blood.
Ryonosyke spins around, and his gaze travels towards the unrecognisable fleshy mush of mincemeat in the room.
"Using my powers of observation.... I think this guy might have touched the victim..."
He then approaches the aforementioned wooden desk.
The young lawyer turns 15° to the left of what Herlock was originally looking at, revealing a giant 700 page book covered in blood that just prior was not visible at all from any other angle. The book is also covered in Call's fingerprints, with his name and signature on a receipt sticking out of it.
Ryonnosuke chortles.
"Looks like we caught this guy... read handed...."
Herlock starts violently flailing his arms everywhere.
"Ah yes. I actually thought this the WHOLE TIME. Thank you naruhodo."
Sholmes and Ryonnosuke then start dancing on the crime scene. A job well done.
Call Preete shivers and starts bawling.
"I-I DIDNT DO IT I PROMISE!!!"
"Ok I believe you" Naruhodo replies.
"Oh ok thanks"
Van zieks is also there, and is seen screaming
"I FUCKING HATE JAPANESE PEOPLE!!!!" At the top of his lungs in a drunken stupor.
He smashes a bottle of wine on a nearby Chinese man's head, instantly killing him.
--
Everything I liked about the original trilogy is here in spades. The iconic ost, insane breakdowns, and an interconnected story that seamlessly weaves together the overarching mystery of the two games. And though some of the characters are slightly less iconic than the original, it makes up for it with strong writing and thoroughly engaging mysteries that kept me engrossed in the story throughout it's 70 hour runtime.
I have been listening to "the great turnabout" for months after I completed this game. I have never had more fun playing a visual novel than in the final case of resolve.
2015
Why don't I get it?
It's a question I asked myself again and again when I played Bloodborne. At this point, I was two thirds of the way done with the game, and was frustrated. Frustrated with the sneak attacks, lacklustre boss fights, long boss runs, and swarms of enemies.
For me, enjoying Bloodborne was hard.
For Sekiro, it was the same. I didn't get it for a long time, at least until owl father. Attempt after attempt, days of slamming my head against the wall. How could someone possibly enjoy this?? But then something clicked. The fun from the boss fight wasn’t obtained from beating it. It came from the fight itself. It came from the ballad of swords clashing, swift dodging, and the ever so satisfying mikiri counter. Mastering the move-set of bosses and flowing through each attack effortlessly was the greatest feeling, more so than seeing “shinobi execution” flashing on your screen.
I couldn't for the life of me understand what wasn’t clicking when I was playing Bloodborne.
The game is not perfect. Far from it. It's littered with so many flaws, so many features that make so little sense. Oftentimes, it's an infuriating experience that’s lacking in fun, fairness, and riddled with obnoxious obstacles.
From my initial impressions, It was by far the weakest souls entry in terms of boss design, difficulty scaling, and grind.
But at the same time, when you slow down your pace, when you're less focused on the objective at hand, you're sucked into the world of Yharnam. And the game is so, so, beautiful, with a solid foundation of gameplay to boot.
I think Bloodborne has a lot to offer. It's not difficult, if anything, it's the second easiest souls game I've played. Despite this, the streets of Yharnam still demand a lot of patience, more so than any other game in the series. But if you can sift through the dirt and grime, I think you’ll be able to see why so many find this to be fromsoft’s magnum opus.
----
The Good
One thing I immediately noticed about bloodborne was the brilliant art design. Not to spoil anything, but the clash of colour palette later on in the game left me in awe at the wondrous skybox. The levels too, yharnam in particular, it feels infected, riddled with disease. The bleak, sinister atmosphere seeps into every crevasse, every brick, every pore in your skin. The horror of living in a decrepit, haunted city filled with grotesque creatures, their terse groans interrupting the eerie whistle of the wind. The haunting yet prepossessing feel of each environment changes ever so slightly, with each area more beguiling than the last.
Combat in this game is also impeccable. Dashing from left to right, sidestepping as a new movement mechanic feels buttery smooth, and the gun parry feels chunky. The weapons too. Snapping a saw, clicking the sheath onto Ludwig's blade. The trick weapons are probably the best in the entire series, with every weapon feeling unique and powerful.
The rally system allows for much more aggressive play. Unlike most souls games. It's not a dance anymore. It's a hunt. You're a predator with an unwieldy pizza cutter, feasting on the blood of your prey. It's messy. It's filthy. As the blood coats your clothing, it shines in the dim flaxen glow of deteriorating streetlights. You claw and maim each other until one of you is a bloody pulp.
It feels great!
Although I personally enjoy the more fluid battles of sekiro and dark souls, I can understand the appeal of the back and forth bloody brawls that take place in this game. It fits the theme, and though not as fun for me personally, it's a fantastic combat system that deserves all the praise it gets.
The sound design and animation in this game, as per usual, is immaculate. You really feel your weapon cleave through the flesh of your enemies. It's visceral and bloody, the chunk chunk chunk of your hefty tool depriving your victim of their blood has never felt this good. The Foley artists of Fromsoft have done an impeccable job.
---
The Bad
By far my favourite part of the series is the boss design. I think the feel and rhythm of all the souls games' bosses feel phenomenal. It's what I look forward to for every fromsoft title. And it's in this feature that the game is anemic.
This is by far my biggest gripe. Good boss encounters are few and far between, with the majority of them being in the fantastic DLC. In sekiro, every clash of blades feels like a dance. In Bloodborne, most bosses feel like you're fighting either an epileptic old animal with awfully telegraphed attacks, a lump of flesh that barely moves or just a bunch of guys throwing shit at you. Rom is the worst offender, with awful enemy spam and a boring moveset. All the boss runs are pretty painful as well, with logarius being by far the worst. Not to mention that much of the difficulty from the bosses stem from fighting the camera instead of the boss.
Another issue I have are the NPC fights. Being so incredibly unbalanced, they're probably the most difficult part of the game. Infinite stamina, insanely high damage, bullet spam and bottomless health pools make every single NPC fight a chore. And there are so. many.
This may be more of a subjective complaint, but I don't find the level layout in Bloodborne particularly intuitive in some cases. People sing the praises of the game's level design, and sure, before you reach the church, it's pretty great. But once you reach the cathedral, some areas in yharnam becomes so labarynthine, so infuriating to navigate, it becomes a chore. It takes such an inordinate amount of time to run from one place to the next even with shortcuts. The lost woods is the worst offender, with shortcuts that don't even save that much time.
I think interconnected levels are a great idea, and are particularly well done in dark souls 1, because it led to a plethora of unforgettable moments. When you think you're stuck, in the thick of a horrifying area, you take an elevator, not knowing where you'll end up. Then you hear the oh so comforting theme of firelink shrine. A wave of relief crashes over you. It feels incredibly satisfying. There is no such thing in Bloodborne. There are just shortcuts for the sake of shortcuts, with no payoff like in dark souls, just a fewer number of checkpoints, and some of the longest runbacks in the series.
One problem I feel that most people would agree on are how unfun consumable healing items are. Making blood vials and bullets consumables was probably the worst decision Fromsoft made in this game. This is an objectively stupid choice, and I know for a fact nobody likes farming for bullets in the middle of their playthrough.
Another subjective gripe I had with the game was the sheer amount of surprise attacks and gang fights. Difficulty in enemy variety and move set is great. I think sekiro does it best by peppering in minibosses and enemies that are tough to deflect, providing a tough, but fair challenge. Exploration is quite enjoyable, and every time you enter a new area, you're excited to see what challenges you encounter next. In Bloodborne, Miyazaki made it his life's goal to make the most torturous, Kafkaesque experience imaginable. Every corner, every turn, there is a group of enemies there to jump you. Down a certain staircase, ten guys and an amygdala. Down an alleyway. Ten guys and a jailer. I think the intention is to keep you on wits end, but I didn’t particularly enjoy this feature. Thankfully it happens much less in the dlc.
---
The base game of Bloodborne sometimes struggles to find a good midpoint between too easy and unfair, and often ends up being both at the same time. It has many confusing design choices that muddy the otherwise crystal clear waters that would have made for a great and memorable game. I think there was a lot missing, and left much to be desired. It felt like it laid a solid foundation for a great game, but made a few missteps in the process. Despite this, it was thoroughly enjoyable, which goes to show the strength of the core gameplay loop, as well as the art direction.
---
DLC
I don't feel very strongly towards the base game of Bloodborne, and I don't think it's a particularly strong entry in the souls series either.
But the old hunters is a different story.
If I could find an analogy, bloodbornes base game is like a chunk of wagyu beef. It's alright on its own, but has the potential to be something fantastic.
The old hunters DLC is like if you drenched it in crack.
It manages to fix every single issue that I had with the base game, with three of the best bosses in the entire series. If the base game was a foundation, the old hunters built a whole condominium on top of it. It has some of the most memorable areas in the entire series, and oozes style from every orifice. Its by far the best expansion Fromsoft has ever made.
If the entire game was at this quality, it would probably be my favourite souls title. By a long shot.
---
Despite bloodborne floundering in its first half, It finds its footing in the second and does a triple double in the DLC. I don’t know if its their best game, but I think its objectively a fantastic one.
It's a question I asked myself again and again when I played Bloodborne. At this point, I was two thirds of the way done with the game, and was frustrated. Frustrated with the sneak attacks, lacklustre boss fights, long boss runs, and swarms of enemies.
For me, enjoying Bloodborne was hard.
For Sekiro, it was the same. I didn't get it for a long time, at least until owl father. Attempt after attempt, days of slamming my head against the wall. How could someone possibly enjoy this?? But then something clicked. The fun from the boss fight wasn’t obtained from beating it. It came from the fight itself. It came from the ballad of swords clashing, swift dodging, and the ever so satisfying mikiri counter. Mastering the move-set of bosses and flowing through each attack effortlessly was the greatest feeling, more so than seeing “shinobi execution” flashing on your screen.
I couldn't for the life of me understand what wasn’t clicking when I was playing Bloodborne.
The game is not perfect. Far from it. It's littered with so many flaws, so many features that make so little sense. Oftentimes, it's an infuriating experience that’s lacking in fun, fairness, and riddled with obnoxious obstacles.
From my initial impressions, It was by far the weakest souls entry in terms of boss design, difficulty scaling, and grind.
But at the same time, when you slow down your pace, when you're less focused on the objective at hand, you're sucked into the world of Yharnam. And the game is so, so, beautiful, with a solid foundation of gameplay to boot.
I think Bloodborne has a lot to offer. It's not difficult, if anything, it's the second easiest souls game I've played. Despite this, the streets of Yharnam still demand a lot of patience, more so than any other game in the series. But if you can sift through the dirt and grime, I think you’ll be able to see why so many find this to be fromsoft’s magnum opus.
----
The Good
One thing I immediately noticed about bloodborne was the brilliant art design. Not to spoil anything, but the clash of colour palette later on in the game left me in awe at the wondrous skybox. The levels too, yharnam in particular, it feels infected, riddled with disease. The bleak, sinister atmosphere seeps into every crevasse, every brick, every pore in your skin. The horror of living in a decrepit, haunted city filled with grotesque creatures, their terse groans interrupting the eerie whistle of the wind. The haunting yet prepossessing feel of each environment changes ever so slightly, with each area more beguiling than the last.
Combat in this game is also impeccable. Dashing from left to right, sidestepping as a new movement mechanic feels buttery smooth, and the gun parry feels chunky. The weapons too. Snapping a saw, clicking the sheath onto Ludwig's blade. The trick weapons are probably the best in the entire series, with every weapon feeling unique and powerful.
The rally system allows for much more aggressive play. Unlike most souls games. It's not a dance anymore. It's a hunt. You're a predator with an unwieldy pizza cutter, feasting on the blood of your prey. It's messy. It's filthy. As the blood coats your clothing, it shines in the dim flaxen glow of deteriorating streetlights. You claw and maim each other until one of you is a bloody pulp.
It feels great!
Although I personally enjoy the more fluid battles of sekiro and dark souls, I can understand the appeal of the back and forth bloody brawls that take place in this game. It fits the theme, and though not as fun for me personally, it's a fantastic combat system that deserves all the praise it gets.
The sound design and animation in this game, as per usual, is immaculate. You really feel your weapon cleave through the flesh of your enemies. It's visceral and bloody, the chunk chunk chunk of your hefty tool depriving your victim of their blood has never felt this good. The Foley artists of Fromsoft have done an impeccable job.
---
The Bad
By far my favourite part of the series is the boss design. I think the feel and rhythm of all the souls games' bosses feel phenomenal. It's what I look forward to for every fromsoft title. And it's in this feature that the game is anemic.
This is by far my biggest gripe. Good boss encounters are few and far between, with the majority of them being in the fantastic DLC. In sekiro, every clash of blades feels like a dance. In Bloodborne, most bosses feel like you're fighting either an epileptic old animal with awfully telegraphed attacks, a lump of flesh that barely moves or just a bunch of guys throwing shit at you. Rom is the worst offender, with awful enemy spam and a boring moveset. All the boss runs are pretty painful as well, with logarius being by far the worst. Not to mention that much of the difficulty from the bosses stem from fighting the camera instead of the boss.
Another issue I have are the NPC fights. Being so incredibly unbalanced, they're probably the most difficult part of the game. Infinite stamina, insanely high damage, bullet spam and bottomless health pools make every single NPC fight a chore. And there are so. many.
This may be more of a subjective complaint, but I don't find the level layout in Bloodborne particularly intuitive in some cases. People sing the praises of the game's level design, and sure, before you reach the church, it's pretty great. But once you reach the cathedral, some areas in yharnam becomes so labarynthine, so infuriating to navigate, it becomes a chore. It takes such an inordinate amount of time to run from one place to the next even with shortcuts. The lost woods is the worst offender, with shortcuts that don't even save that much time.
I think interconnected levels are a great idea, and are particularly well done in dark souls 1, because it led to a plethora of unforgettable moments. When you think you're stuck, in the thick of a horrifying area, you take an elevator, not knowing where you'll end up. Then you hear the oh so comforting theme of firelink shrine. A wave of relief crashes over you. It feels incredibly satisfying. There is no such thing in Bloodborne. There are just shortcuts for the sake of shortcuts, with no payoff like in dark souls, just a fewer number of checkpoints, and some of the longest runbacks in the series.
One problem I feel that most people would agree on are how unfun consumable healing items are. Making blood vials and bullets consumables was probably the worst decision Fromsoft made in this game. This is an objectively stupid choice, and I know for a fact nobody likes farming for bullets in the middle of their playthrough.
Another subjective gripe I had with the game was the sheer amount of surprise attacks and gang fights. Difficulty in enemy variety and move set is great. I think sekiro does it best by peppering in minibosses and enemies that are tough to deflect, providing a tough, but fair challenge. Exploration is quite enjoyable, and every time you enter a new area, you're excited to see what challenges you encounter next. In Bloodborne, Miyazaki made it his life's goal to make the most torturous, Kafkaesque experience imaginable. Every corner, every turn, there is a group of enemies there to jump you. Down a certain staircase, ten guys and an amygdala. Down an alleyway. Ten guys and a jailer. I think the intention is to keep you on wits end, but I didn’t particularly enjoy this feature. Thankfully it happens much less in the dlc.
---
The base game of Bloodborne sometimes struggles to find a good midpoint between too easy and unfair, and often ends up being both at the same time. It has many confusing design choices that muddy the otherwise crystal clear waters that would have made for a great and memorable game. I think there was a lot missing, and left much to be desired. It felt like it laid a solid foundation for a great game, but made a few missteps in the process. Despite this, it was thoroughly enjoyable, which goes to show the strength of the core gameplay loop, as well as the art direction.
---
DLC
I don't feel very strongly towards the base game of Bloodborne, and I don't think it's a particularly strong entry in the souls series either.
But the old hunters is a different story.
If I could find an analogy, bloodbornes base game is like a chunk of wagyu beef. It's alright on its own, but has the potential to be something fantastic.
The old hunters DLC is like if you drenched it in crack.
It manages to fix every single issue that I had with the base game, with three of the best bosses in the entire series. If the base game was a foundation, the old hunters built a whole condominium on top of it. It has some of the most memorable areas in the entire series, and oozes style from every orifice. Its by far the best expansion Fromsoft has ever made.
If the entire game was at this quality, it would probably be my favourite souls title. By a long shot.
---
Despite bloodborne floundering in its first half, It finds its footing in the second and does a triple double in the DLC. I don’t know if its their best game, but I think its objectively a fantastic one.
2017
I think subjective quality of games and enjoyment of said games are not mutually exclusive.
This has never been more evident in my love/hate/mostly hate relationship with destiny 2. Its a popular analogy, but being a fan of destiny is like having being in an abusive relationship.
You're bled dry of your time and money.
"Oh but it has so much potential to be better!"
"Yeah sure the past few weeks/months/years have been disappointing but things are looking up!"
Things like that.
But then in orbit, deep stone lullaby plays. and I'm reminded of the awe I felt in the deep stone crypt, in the middle of the night with five of my best friends.
"You now face godlike judgement. May it extend eternally."
The gorgeous skybox filled with a fleet of fallen ships, surrounding a giant space station piloted by an egomaniacal trillionaire that's survived thousands of years. You see the icy tundras of Europa thousands of metres beneath you, and the violent icy winds that sweep the destination curl like ribbons in its atmosphere.
It was new years day, and that night we finished every single raid in the game. Memories like that is why destiny is so special to me.
The talent and passion of the music team, the art of the game, the skyboxes, the sound designers... Hundreds of people poured their heart and soul into this massive project, and I felt that. I felt it in the wee hours of the morning grinding dungeons, I felt it on the final win on trials of osiris cards, and I felt it when I killed oryx with my clan.
All that being said, I cannot in good conscience reccomend this game to literally anyone. I spent nearly 300 dollars just to play it. That is not an amount of money anybody should spend on dlc alone.
Bungie is one of the greediest game studios in existence. They laid off hundreds of employees, including the person that made the aforementioned deep stone lullaby. Skins in the microtransaction store cost 10 dollars a pop. Each DLC on release costs almost 100 dollars, and every year they remove added content from the game, content that you PAID for. All so their executives could line their pockets.
They continue to ignore the pleas of fans for no good reason, laying off their community managers for the game.
There was so much wasted potential that I can't help but feel so, so angry. That something I used to enjoy so much and had so many fond memories of will never reach the heights I believed it would reach. A game that so many brilliant people worked on but will never get compensated fairly for their hard work. A game that I spent so many hours on and made so many memories with so many friends on.
I waited so long for destiny to become what so many people believed it could be, and im done waiting.
This has never been more evident in my love/hate/mostly hate relationship with destiny 2. Its a popular analogy, but being a fan of destiny is like having being in an abusive relationship.
You're bled dry of your time and money.
"Oh but it has so much potential to be better!"
"Yeah sure the past few weeks/months/years have been disappointing but things are looking up!"
Things like that.
But then in orbit, deep stone lullaby plays. and I'm reminded of the awe I felt in the deep stone crypt, in the middle of the night with five of my best friends.
"You now face godlike judgement. May it extend eternally."
The gorgeous skybox filled with a fleet of fallen ships, surrounding a giant space station piloted by an egomaniacal trillionaire that's survived thousands of years. You see the icy tundras of Europa thousands of metres beneath you, and the violent icy winds that sweep the destination curl like ribbons in its atmosphere.
It was new years day, and that night we finished every single raid in the game. Memories like that is why destiny is so special to me.
The talent and passion of the music team, the art of the game, the skyboxes, the sound designers... Hundreds of people poured their heart and soul into this massive project, and I felt that. I felt it in the wee hours of the morning grinding dungeons, I felt it on the final win on trials of osiris cards, and I felt it when I killed oryx with my clan.
All that being said, I cannot in good conscience reccomend this game to literally anyone. I spent nearly 300 dollars just to play it. That is not an amount of money anybody should spend on dlc alone.
Bungie is one of the greediest game studios in existence. They laid off hundreds of employees, including the person that made the aforementioned deep stone lullaby. Skins in the microtransaction store cost 10 dollars a pop. Each DLC on release costs almost 100 dollars, and every year they remove added content from the game, content that you PAID for. All so their executives could line their pockets.
They continue to ignore the pleas of fans for no good reason, laying off their community managers for the game.
There was so much wasted potential that I can't help but feel so, so angry. That something I used to enjoy so much and had so many fond memories of will never reach the heights I believed it would reach. A game that so many brilliant people worked on but will never get compensated fairly for their hard work. A game that I spent so many hours on and made so many memories with so many friends on.
I waited so long for destiny to become what so many people believed it could be, and im done waiting.
The average ace attorney case goes something like this:
Wright hadn't seen a case much like this one. He had only a day to prepare for the defense of one Caul Pable, who was seen covered in the victims blood at the crime scene. The victim, Catt Phish, was brutalised in a fast food joint, all of his digits severed. A truly morbid sight.
Phoenix enters the courtroom with a baby dressed in traditional American kimono-spirit-medium garb, nothing in his court record but an (updated) autopsy report and three fish sticks.
Nick approaches the stand, with Edgeworth at the table opposite.
"You're not going to win this time, wright." Edgeworth grins. " Your pathetic attempts at defending this paltry man will only lead to your inevitable defeat."
His glare glides towards the accused, Caul Pable. Caul shivers.
Phoenix brushes off the prosecutors taunts, and the judge promptly orders the first witness to the stand.
The witness, bart tocks, grins from ear to ear.
"You see, all I did on Friday, the day of the murder, was fry some seafood sir, I'm not guilty by any me-"
"OBJECTION!!"
his shout is loud, reverberating throughout the courtroom.
"You see, Mr Bart... That's where you're wrong... You actually ARE guilty because, referring to this autopsy report, the murder didn't happen on Friday... IT HAPPENED ON THURSDAY!!!"
the crowd gasps, and the judge's mouth is agape.
The gavel strikes the table three times. "Wow this is looking really bad for you dude" the bearded man exclaims.
Bart breaks out in cold sweat, and starts break dancing nervously in the courtroom.
"B-but you don't have any evidence!! How could I have killed the man, I was frying fish!" Tocks stammers.
"OBJECTION!!"
"Wh-what?"
"You see Bart... You may have been deep frying... But you have also been... DEEP LYING!! May I present to the court... THESE FISH STICKS!!"
Phoenix tosses the fish in the air, and the day old golden brown snacks land on the table, its oily surface spreading grease on the autopsy report.
Miles grins, a dimple appearing on his cheek. With his palms to the sky, he shrugs and shakes his head. "Phoenix, my nemo-sis... you're making a mockery of this courtroom providing such fishy evidence. You better explain yourself- or you're fin-ished."
Phoenix chuckles.
"Ladies and gentlemen of the court, may I present to you the evidence of this man's guilt."
Phoenix peels open the fish sticks, revealing... the victims severed thumb.
"Looks like we found it. The fingers... Or should I say... Phish's fingers."
Edgeworth, taken aback, stumbles, reeling from shock. He grabs his chair to regain his bearings. As he sees phoenix grin at him, his grip tightens, turning his palms white.
"You see, the crumbs that led to me finding this out were all laid out by this witness... who was actually concealing evidence in these very same breadcrumbs... Panko breadcrumbs to be exact."
"GRRR.... I LEFT THOSE OILY THINGS OUTSIDE!!! I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE WAITED FOR IT TO RAIN!!!" The defendant wails. His cries are met with furrowed brows and shaking heads.
Phoenix lifts his index finger and points it in the air triumphantly. "The only fingering you'll get... WILL BE IN PRISON!!"
Bart Tocks entire body convulses, his eyeballs repeatedly pop out of his head and snap back into their sockets, steam pouring out of his ears. Then his head explodes.
"Well looks like we've seen enough! I'm going to take a nap! Not guilty!" The judge jubilantly exclaims.
Gumshoe celebrates by throwing confetti in the air, and then is promptly escorted out of the premises. Maya is seen outside the courtroom eating a burger. Fatty.
Edgeworth slams his fists on the mahogany table with a thunderous BANG!.
"Im..impossible!!"
His head snaps toward phoenix, his eyes bloodshot, veins popping out of his temple. They lock eyes.
Then they take off their clothes and start making out in front of the judge.
-
The closest thing to ace attorney I can think of off the top of my head would be the Sam Raimi Spiderman movies. Campy, but with alot of heart.
Technically speaking, there's nothing to laud about. Other than the brilliant soundtrack, the art is average, the puzzles vary in quality, and there are massive plotholes.
But what it lacks in quality of its individual elements, it makes up for in said heart.
It's hard to describe, but this game oozes passion and style from every orifice. The creators of this game, from the writers to the localisers clearly have put in so much care into this story, producing something so utterly charming. This game expertly whisks you away in it's ridiculous yet fleshed out world full of perjury and lovable characters.
It's so easy to become engrossed in each mystery, each puzzle ranging from bafflingly simple to a complex mental rube Goldberg machine of a million moving parts that somehow all click together and make sense in the end. But this range is what keeps you guessing, and what makes it so fun.
And that's not to mention, taking each individual element on it's own is doing this game a disservice. This game, this trilogy as a whole needs to be evaluated as one single continuous story. Despite the noticably weaker second entry, each game heavily references the events of previous entries. Elements from the first and second game become retroactively improved once the final game is completed, and yet the final game wouldn't feel as gratifying and memorable without having played the first two.
The soundtrack is probably the best part of the game. The fragrance of dark coffee in particular was my favourite.
In ace attorney, throughout each case, you're fed these passive tunes during the investigations, calming soft music that mirror the scenario that the characters are in. As the case speeds up in pace, so does the ost. You enter the courtroom, and you're assaulted with tense tunes that keep you on the edge of your seat. Then, at the very climax, the moment that hours of gameplay has led up to.
The pursuit theme plays.
And there's this release. Release of all the tension and excitement that's been building up the entire time, and your ears are blessed with the best fucking music in video games.
The greatest compliment I can give ace attorney is that if I played this ten years ago I would have become insufferable and would base my entire personality off of Edgeworth. And playing it now, it fills me with this sense of whimsy that reminds me of when I played Pokémon when I was a kid. A strange sense of nostalgia that I guess comes with games made during the early 2000s.
This trilogy goes on sale on steam pretty frequently together with TGAAC, so I highly reccomend buying it when theyre bundled.
Wright hadn't seen a case much like this one. He had only a day to prepare for the defense of one Caul Pable, who was seen covered in the victims blood at the crime scene. The victim, Catt Phish, was brutalised in a fast food joint, all of his digits severed. A truly morbid sight.
Phoenix enters the courtroom with a baby dressed in traditional American kimono-spirit-medium garb, nothing in his court record but an (updated) autopsy report and three fish sticks.
Nick approaches the stand, with Edgeworth at the table opposite.
"You're not going to win this time, wright." Edgeworth grins. " Your pathetic attempts at defending this paltry man will only lead to your inevitable defeat."
His glare glides towards the accused, Caul Pable. Caul shivers.
Phoenix brushes off the prosecutors taunts, and the judge promptly orders the first witness to the stand.
The witness, bart tocks, grins from ear to ear.
"You see, all I did on Friday, the day of the murder, was fry some seafood sir, I'm not guilty by any me-"
"OBJECTION!!"
his shout is loud, reverberating throughout the courtroom.
"You see, Mr Bart... That's where you're wrong... You actually ARE guilty because, referring to this autopsy report, the murder didn't happen on Friday... IT HAPPENED ON THURSDAY!!!"
the crowd gasps, and the judge's mouth is agape.
The gavel strikes the table three times. "Wow this is looking really bad for you dude" the bearded man exclaims.
Bart breaks out in cold sweat, and starts break dancing nervously in the courtroom.
"B-but you don't have any evidence!! How could I have killed the man, I was frying fish!" Tocks stammers.
"OBJECTION!!"
"Wh-what?"
"You see Bart... You may have been deep frying... But you have also been... DEEP LYING!! May I present to the court... THESE FISH STICKS!!"
Phoenix tosses the fish in the air, and the day old golden brown snacks land on the table, its oily surface spreading grease on the autopsy report.
Miles grins, a dimple appearing on his cheek. With his palms to the sky, he shrugs and shakes his head. "Phoenix, my nemo-sis... you're making a mockery of this courtroom providing such fishy evidence. You better explain yourself- or you're fin-ished."
Phoenix chuckles.
"Ladies and gentlemen of the court, may I present to you the evidence of this man's guilt."
Phoenix peels open the fish sticks, revealing... the victims severed thumb.
"Looks like we found it. The fingers... Or should I say... Phish's fingers."
Edgeworth, taken aback, stumbles, reeling from shock. He grabs his chair to regain his bearings. As he sees phoenix grin at him, his grip tightens, turning his palms white.
"You see, the crumbs that led to me finding this out were all laid out by this witness... who was actually concealing evidence in these very same breadcrumbs... Panko breadcrumbs to be exact."
"GRRR.... I LEFT THOSE OILY THINGS OUTSIDE!!! I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE WAITED FOR IT TO RAIN!!!" The defendant wails. His cries are met with furrowed brows and shaking heads.
Phoenix lifts his index finger and points it in the air triumphantly. "The only fingering you'll get... WILL BE IN PRISON!!"
Bart Tocks entire body convulses, his eyeballs repeatedly pop out of his head and snap back into their sockets, steam pouring out of his ears. Then his head explodes.
"Well looks like we've seen enough! I'm going to take a nap! Not guilty!" The judge jubilantly exclaims.
Gumshoe celebrates by throwing confetti in the air, and then is promptly escorted out of the premises. Maya is seen outside the courtroom eating a burger. Fatty.
Edgeworth slams his fists on the mahogany table with a thunderous BANG!.
"Im..impossible!!"
His head snaps toward phoenix, his eyes bloodshot, veins popping out of his temple. They lock eyes.
Then they take off their clothes and start making out in front of the judge.
-
The closest thing to ace attorney I can think of off the top of my head would be the Sam Raimi Spiderman movies. Campy, but with alot of heart.
Technically speaking, there's nothing to laud about. Other than the brilliant soundtrack, the art is average, the puzzles vary in quality, and there are massive plotholes.
But what it lacks in quality of its individual elements, it makes up for in said heart.
It's hard to describe, but this game oozes passion and style from every orifice. The creators of this game, from the writers to the localisers clearly have put in so much care into this story, producing something so utterly charming. This game expertly whisks you away in it's ridiculous yet fleshed out world full of perjury and lovable characters.
It's so easy to become engrossed in each mystery, each puzzle ranging from bafflingly simple to a complex mental rube Goldberg machine of a million moving parts that somehow all click together and make sense in the end. But this range is what keeps you guessing, and what makes it so fun.
And that's not to mention, taking each individual element on it's own is doing this game a disservice. This game, this trilogy as a whole needs to be evaluated as one single continuous story. Despite the noticably weaker second entry, each game heavily references the events of previous entries. Elements from the first and second game become retroactively improved once the final game is completed, and yet the final game wouldn't feel as gratifying and memorable without having played the first two.
The soundtrack is probably the best part of the game. The fragrance of dark coffee in particular was my favourite.
In ace attorney, throughout each case, you're fed these passive tunes during the investigations, calming soft music that mirror the scenario that the characters are in. As the case speeds up in pace, so does the ost. You enter the courtroom, and you're assaulted with tense tunes that keep you on the edge of your seat. Then, at the very climax, the moment that hours of gameplay has led up to.
The pursuit theme plays.
And there's this release. Release of all the tension and excitement that's been building up the entire time, and your ears are blessed with the best fucking music in video games.
The greatest compliment I can give ace attorney is that if I played this ten years ago I would have become insufferable and would base my entire personality off of Edgeworth. And playing it now, it fills me with this sense of whimsy that reminds me of when I played Pokémon when I was a kid. A strange sense of nostalgia that I guess comes with games made during the early 2000s.
This trilogy goes on sale on steam pretty frequently together with TGAAC, so I highly reccomend buying it when theyre bundled.
2016
In Tibetan Buddhism, there is a practice of creating detailed patterned mandelas out of colored sand. They spend days weaving these intricate patterns of profound beauty.
And then they destroy it. Sweep it up. Hours upon hours of labor gone. It's done to symbolise impermanence. How nothing lasts forever. And, without saying too much, I think dark souls 3's story manages to encapsulate that wonderfully.
The aesthetic is another thing.
Ash on top of ash. A bleak smouldering flame casts a boundless shadow on a vast nothing. Mounds of dust pile up on a bleak, dead world. The grey palette of this world accentuates this fact. And yet, there's beauty in it, beauty in the faded colours of tattered tapestries and stone monuments from a bygone era. The struggle of the worlds inhabitants, their hollowed bodies like broken down machines, their ideals and aspirations long gone, as their flesh twitches and moves by instinct alone. The mangled corpse of this world has been violated, moulded into an unrecognisable shape by forces that resist change. Something that was meant to burn with vigor and grace has now become unsightly cinders, begging to be snuffed out.
This is not even mentioning the combat. Being a zombie clad in rusted armour and tattered clothing has never felt this good. With each swing of my exile Greatsword, you feel the weight of the unwieldy hunk of steel. But the animations make you feel like it's something one can hold with grace. The swings cut through the air, and feel responsive and chunky. The bosses, giant figures that tower over you. Which makes it all the more gratifying when they get staggered when hit by a tiny undead carrying a comically large weapon. The combat, while not as tight as sekiro, still has a rhythm to it. The boss fights are the best out of any souls game, with the worst of them still being memorable experiences, but the best feeling like a dance. They swing, you roll. It takes two to tango, and Gael needs a dance partner. The responsive combat and fluid animations making it all the more satisfying to get in a fight.
The combat is tight. The story, a fitting for a conclusion to this long running saga. And the world is a sight to behold. I could not ask for a better conclusion to the series.
And then they destroy it. Sweep it up. Hours upon hours of labor gone. It's done to symbolise impermanence. How nothing lasts forever. And, without saying too much, I think dark souls 3's story manages to encapsulate that wonderfully.
The aesthetic is another thing.
Ash on top of ash. A bleak smouldering flame casts a boundless shadow on a vast nothing. Mounds of dust pile up on a bleak, dead world. The grey palette of this world accentuates this fact. And yet, there's beauty in it, beauty in the faded colours of tattered tapestries and stone monuments from a bygone era. The struggle of the worlds inhabitants, their hollowed bodies like broken down machines, their ideals and aspirations long gone, as their flesh twitches and moves by instinct alone. The mangled corpse of this world has been violated, moulded into an unrecognisable shape by forces that resist change. Something that was meant to burn with vigor and grace has now become unsightly cinders, begging to be snuffed out.
This is not even mentioning the combat. Being a zombie clad in rusted armour and tattered clothing has never felt this good. With each swing of my exile Greatsword, you feel the weight of the unwieldy hunk of steel. But the animations make you feel like it's something one can hold with grace. The swings cut through the air, and feel responsive and chunky. The bosses, giant figures that tower over you. Which makes it all the more gratifying when they get staggered when hit by a tiny undead carrying a comically large weapon. The combat, while not as tight as sekiro, still has a rhythm to it. The boss fights are the best out of any souls game, with the worst of them still being memorable experiences, but the best feeling like a dance. They swing, you roll. It takes two to tango, and Gael needs a dance partner. The responsive combat and fluid animations making it all the more satisfying to get in a fight.
The combat is tight. The story, a fitting for a conclusion to this long running saga. And the world is a sight to behold. I could not ask for a better conclusion to the series.
2019
Six different planets orbit a dying star.
One is collapsing in on itself.
You hear a banjo play. The man on the rock tells you he's scared. He doesn't want to die. It's homely twangs ring through the indifferent universe. The universe does not care that he is scared.
One has winds, winds so violent they fling islands into space.
A man plays his flute, and stares into the basil clouds, waiting for something to happen. He meditates. The universe waits along with him.
Two have sand that pours in between and up and down and in and out of nooks and crannies of places long forgotten.
The rhythm of drums from an idle mind and itchy hands echo into space. A scientist thinking, wondering about the secrets of the stars. The universe keeps her secrets.
One is wooden filled with impossibly large places in impossibly small seeds. Silence. white, red, light piercing through the fog.
The reeds of a harmonica cut through the eerie atmosphere, and the sounds reverberate through marrow and bone. The universe is oblivious of the horrors it houses.
A tiny moon spins around a planet filled with green and life, wood and houses, science and spaceships.
A lonely fish sings a tune by a campfire in his solitude. He sits there, roasting marshmallows. He whistles a familiar song that the others remember. His voice cracks along with the flames that caramelise his tasty treat.
And the universe listens.
It's been a long time since I've played outer wilds. I think it's hard to put into words how much the game means to me. I'm glad this game was made, and I'm glad that I played it.
One is collapsing in on itself.
You hear a banjo play. The man on the rock tells you he's scared. He doesn't want to die. It's homely twangs ring through the indifferent universe. The universe does not care that he is scared.
One has winds, winds so violent they fling islands into space.
A man plays his flute, and stares into the basil clouds, waiting for something to happen. He meditates. The universe waits along with him.
Two have sand that pours in between and up and down and in and out of nooks and crannies of places long forgotten.
The rhythm of drums from an idle mind and itchy hands echo into space. A scientist thinking, wondering about the secrets of the stars. The universe keeps her secrets.
One is wooden filled with impossibly large places in impossibly small seeds. Silence. white, red, light piercing through the fog.
The reeds of a harmonica cut through the eerie atmosphere, and the sounds reverberate through marrow and bone. The universe is oblivious of the horrors it houses.
A tiny moon spins around a planet filled with green and life, wood and houses, science and spaceships.
A lonely fish sings a tune by a campfire in his solitude. He sits there, roasting marshmallows. He whistles a familiar song that the others remember. His voice cracks along with the flames that caramelise his tasty treat.
And the universe listens.
It's been a long time since I've played outer wilds. I think it's hard to put into words how much the game means to me. I'm glad this game was made, and I'm glad that I played it.
2023
If I were to say what lies of P does better than any other souls game, it would be its consistency.
Fromsoft's souls games have a unique ethereal charm to them, a special feel in both the design of the characters, bosses and areas that give it that signature fromsoft spice. They are some of my favourite video games ever made, but they are anything but perfect. Dark Souls 3 has a middling start, but eventually picks up and peaks in the DLC. This pattern is seen in the original dark souls, and even sekiro. Elden ring also has its issues with dips in quality just due to the sheer vastness of its open world. They're all masterpieces, but there are definitely areas, features and even bosses that I think each game would be better without.
Lies of P is a different story. I cannot find a single aspect of this game that it would be better without.
Almost all of the bosses in the game are exceptional, with every enemy type feeling unique and fun to engage with. The weapons are snappy, the deflects and dodges feel incredibly responsive, and the upgrade system is surprisingly generous with the unique and impactful changes you can make to your "P organ" to compliment your specific playstyle.
Each individual aspect of this game is polished to a brilliant sheen, with the combat system being especially standout. Stringing deflects and attacks reminded me heavily of sekiro, and getting into a flow-state in the middle of intense boss fights was exhilarating. The amount of fun I had with the mid-game boss and laxasia cannot be understated. Beating laxasia in particular was one of the most satisfying feelings I have ever had in a souls game.
Despite lacking the "secret sauce" of fromsoft's souls series, Lies of P manages to carve its own identity in a genre that is becoming increasingly saturated.
Fromsoft's souls games have a unique ethereal charm to them, a special feel in both the design of the characters, bosses and areas that give it that signature fromsoft spice. They are some of my favourite video games ever made, but they are anything but perfect. Dark Souls 3 has a middling start, but eventually picks up and peaks in the DLC. This pattern is seen in the original dark souls, and even sekiro. Elden ring also has its issues with dips in quality just due to the sheer vastness of its open world. They're all masterpieces, but there are definitely areas, features and even bosses that I think each game would be better without.
Lies of P is a different story. I cannot find a single aspect of this game that it would be better without.
Almost all of the bosses in the game are exceptional, with every enemy type feeling unique and fun to engage with. The weapons are snappy, the deflects and dodges feel incredibly responsive, and the upgrade system is surprisingly generous with the unique and impactful changes you can make to your "P organ" to compliment your specific playstyle.
Each individual aspect of this game is polished to a brilliant sheen, with the combat system being especially standout. Stringing deflects and attacks reminded me heavily of sekiro, and getting into a flow-state in the middle of intense boss fights was exhilarating. The amount of fun I had with the mid-game boss and laxasia cannot be understated. Beating laxasia in particular was one of the most satisfying feelings I have ever had in a souls game.
Despite lacking the "secret sauce" of fromsoft's souls series, Lies of P manages to carve its own identity in a genre that is becoming increasingly saturated.
One of my favourite shows is an anthology drama series called midnight diner.
Its about a small hole in the wall, and each episode is about a regular who frequents the place, telling their story to the chef of the diner. What goes on in their lives in that specific period of time, and then it ends. There's no big event, no epilogue, no closure or clear definitive end to the story. Just a few days in a person's life, and then the story ends, usually with the customer's favourite dish being shown. Not much happens.
And it's brilliant.
Vallhalla reminded me of midnight diner. Which is probably why it's one of my favourite games I've played all year.
Vallhalla is about the last few days before a bar's closure, Jill's interactions with her regular customers and the lives they live in glitch city, a cyberpunk shithole. But just through these interactions, the place feels lived in.
You're thrown straight into the middle of Jill's life, with no context and information, but it's easy to gain your bearings when the world building is as strong as it is in vallhalla.
Every character's visit was something I was looking forward to, my personal favourite being the head writer of a local newspaper. The events going on in their lives never failed to entertain, mundane or otherwise.
The snappy writing and distinct character design makes the 12 hour runtime of this bartender simulator feel short, and I'm excited to see what the developers of this game have in store for the sequel.
The drinks are crappy, the location is awful, the place makes no money, and it smells like dog piss.
Time to mix drinks and change lives.
Its about a small hole in the wall, and each episode is about a regular who frequents the place, telling their story to the chef of the diner. What goes on in their lives in that specific period of time, and then it ends. There's no big event, no epilogue, no closure or clear definitive end to the story. Just a few days in a person's life, and then the story ends, usually with the customer's favourite dish being shown. Not much happens.
And it's brilliant.
Vallhalla reminded me of midnight diner. Which is probably why it's one of my favourite games I've played all year.
Vallhalla is about the last few days before a bar's closure, Jill's interactions with her regular customers and the lives they live in glitch city, a cyberpunk shithole. But just through these interactions, the place feels lived in.
You're thrown straight into the middle of Jill's life, with no context and information, but it's easy to gain your bearings when the world building is as strong as it is in vallhalla.
Every character's visit was something I was looking forward to, my personal favourite being the head writer of a local newspaper. The events going on in their lives never failed to entertain, mundane or otherwise.
The snappy writing and distinct character design makes the 12 hour runtime of this bartender simulator feel short, and I'm excited to see what the developers of this game have in store for the sequel.
The drinks are crappy, the location is awful, the place makes no money, and it smells like dog piss.
Time to mix drinks and change lives.
2023
I play it every week with my friends and still suck
Metals clash, and sparks fly. The rhythmic sounds of blades colliding put you in a hypnotic trance. Clink. Clink. Pause. Clink clink. It's euphoric. Sekiro has by far the most satisfying combat in gaming. From genichiro to owl father, each boss is like it's own song in a rhythm game, like piano tiles on steroids. Each moveset like an improvised line in jazz, the boss attacks like the sax, and you're the accompanying bass. One fuck up though, and your entire flow is ruined. It's game over in an instant.
Sekiro is hard. It's probably the hardest game I've ever played. But it's only hard in the beginning. If you're mentally prepared to suffer for just a few hours, I promise you, when you get out the other side and really learn how to play the game, and engage with it's mechanics, it makes you feel like an unstoppable cyborg ninja killing machine.
Sekiro is hard. It's probably the hardest game I've ever played. But it's only hard in the beginning. If you're mentally prepared to suffer for just a few hours, I promise you, when you get out the other side and really learn how to play the game, and engage with it's mechanics, it makes you feel like an unstoppable cyborg ninja killing machine.
The steam page of "Disco Elysium" flashes on your screen. You've heard things. Good things. Buying it doesn't support the developers though. You consider getting a key instead.
you scrape your fingernail on the cheap white plastic of your mouse. It's rough, scraping it is only slightly more pleasant than doing the same to a blackboard.
Its thirty four dollars. thirty four bennies. dollary doos. moolah. You run out of synonyms for money.
That's like five hamburgers. Maybe. You haven't eaten them in a while.
A sepentine voice whispers in your ear. "clickkk your mousssse"
The pointer on your screen hovers over the glowing Smaragdine "Add to Cart".
You've finally lost it. The voices in your inky black conscious have come out to play.
You feel the flesh on your index flatten, a short drop, then it stops.
"click"
The mouse slides across smooth fabric, and the feeling repeats.
"click"
"click"
"click"
You've opened it.
The screen is filled with watercolor paint, the rough strokes of a brush, a grungy city/town/place/area/thing , its layers moving, the blue sky, clouds lapping like waves in an ocean.
On its left, a black box with "NEW GAME" in it.
"click"
You have a feeling that you wont regret it.
Welcome to Revachol.
you scrape your fingernail on the cheap white plastic of your mouse. It's rough, scraping it is only slightly more pleasant than doing the same to a blackboard.
Its thirty four dollars. thirty four bennies. dollary doos. moolah. You run out of synonyms for money.
That's like five hamburgers. Maybe. You haven't eaten them in a while.
A sepentine voice whispers in your ear. "clickkk your mousssse"
The pointer on your screen hovers over the glowing Smaragdine "Add to Cart".
You've finally lost it. The voices in your inky black conscious have come out to play.
You feel the flesh on your index flatten, a short drop, then it stops.
"click"
The mouse slides across smooth fabric, and the feeling repeats.
"click"
"click"
"click"
You've opened it.
The screen is filled with watercolor paint, the rough strokes of a brush, a grungy city/town/place/area/thing , its layers moving, the blue sky, clouds lapping like waves in an ocean.
On its left, a black box with "NEW GAME" in it.
"click"
You have a feeling that you wont regret it.
Welcome to Revachol.
2023
dumb fun