Games I Will Force Hilda To Play

Everything but the first 43 games are very very bad and potentially offensive, but hildas must endure

Dredge
Dredge
I don't know what this is

Played April 12:
I still don't know what this is
Buckshot Roulette
Buckshot Roulette
Feb 2024

Hilda (depressed): if i played russian roulette i wouldnt be scared
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles
Finished august 29th:
Well hildas if youre reading this it was an honor and a pleasure to show you one of my favorite things in the world and i hope you had a good time. It was a very memorable experience and i had a blast reliving the game.
Dead by Daylight
Dead by Daylight
Played April 7th:

Dbd is the only game that makes me feel like im working a 9 to 5 office job, and I only watched hilda play
OneShot
OneShot
The Quarry
The Quarry
October 18th:

They had the gall to wrangle together a game that couldnt even take itself seriously for half a second with zero atmosphere and no redeeming qualities and even still they had the audacity to make a joke of the Andes rugby team mountain crash. Also, werewolves? Wolves? No... just generic gmod creatures... absolute puke.

A man cut off his arm- dramatic action. Zero gravity. Also, he would die. From shock. I wish he did.
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Paranormasight: The Seven Mysteries of Honjo
Kirby: Planet Robobot
Kirby: Planet Robobot
Amnesia: The Bunker
Amnesia: The Bunker
Played june 6th:

I hate amnesia and i hate their games and i hate reading 500 notes and i hate world war 1 and i hate the french and i hate that gay glasses dude that died in a gay fashion and i hate finding keys and i hate the gun you only use to shoot barrels and doors and i hate that awful awful awful wet shit of an ending that i stayed up to watch but i do like world whirls guy.
Rule of Rose
Rule of Rose
My House
My House
Played may 28th:
It was a bit boring to watch because it was pretty much just doom inside a house with some weird things occasionally. I thought it might be creepier, but i dont much sbout doom so i cant attest to it really.
Shenmue
Shenmue
you didnt play this.
PaRappa the Rapper
PaRappa the Rapper
The Exit 8
The Exit 8
December 28th

->
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POSTAR!
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postar. uh oh. freeky....
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normal in my hallway
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im so excited to get out of this hallway! by goodness, im almost there!
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0
oh... my word. i wish there was a beautiful closet woman to comfort me. but that would never happen.
Ib
Ib
KinitoPet
KinitoPet
Febuary something 2024

Cunt I Am hildas best friend do NOT play games. Alone in the Dark? What the fuck is this? Any hildabro would KNOW that she loves quiche and would KNOW that her favorite game is pokemon. Get your pink out of my stink
Indigo Park
Indigo Park
The Outlast Trials
The Outlast Trials
The trial is trying to get this piece of shit to download
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre
Probably not bad but since hilda just LOVES Texas chainsaw massacre so much I am sure she will have a blast

Played may 29th:
No useful tutorials or map preview makes for the most confusing online horror game ive ever seen. Several mechanics just straight up were not explained and theres no explanation online. Seems like it could be fun but someone needs to write a breakdown on what youre supposed to do in this game.

BUBBA SWEEP!!
PokéPark Wii: Pikachu's Adventure
PokéPark Wii: Pikachu's Adventure
Pickle chu
Garten of Banban 7
Garten of Banban 7
May 13th 2024

OH.... MY... JOSH! talk about a HAPY ENDING! oppa bird and everyone is okay. Banbalina was CHEATING on banban with janjan. you just dont know who to trust nowadays. Im also addicted to cigarettes.
Killer Frequency
Killer Frequency
Played june 1st:
I was looking forward to it but nothing really makes any sense and the hook feels like it doesnt exist. The dialogue feels stilted and offputting and none of the jokes landed. There is no horror or sense of anticipation. I have never ever ever gotten bored with a game but i got too restless to even continue watching. Really, really weird execution.
Orbo's Odyssey
Orbo's Odyssey
Played at a date

orbos dream.... shot straight like an arrow, across lava and cliffs and offices..... peeb....
Façade
Façade
September 23rd

I want mineral ter! I want italy photo and couch. Trips ~fabulous~ home continues to be full of silliness. I am going to clip into your balcony now, okay.
The Thing
The Thing
Played june 7th:

I was painting. There was a cargo bay and a man and a friend and the friend kept dying and oh my godness... got thing'd. No puppy! Sad!
Hollowbody
Hollowbody
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me
SAW!!!!! I wanna play a game!!!!! Lol

Played March 24th

i hate this.
Telling Lies
Telling Lies
The Godfather
The Godfather
My Friendly Neighborhood
My Friendly Neighborhood
Played july 25th:
This was like a strange bugsnax esque game but the implied religious symbolism was strange
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix+
I have an excellent on Jitterbug on hard, my only claim to fame

Played on April 7th: hilda got so overwhelmed after 3 songs that she just gave up and watched me play
Legend of Mana
Legend of Mana
The Casting of Frank Stone
The Casting of Frank Stone
A Proper Cup of Tea
A Proper Cup of Tea
MySims
MySims
Played April 27th:

Found a game I played in my childhood.
.. was my Sims kingdom but I win
Last Seen Online
Last Seen Online
April 24 2024

Reminds me of hypnospace, very darling passion project
Poptropica
Poptropica
we need to make a hilda world

Feb 8th

GOD. WHERE. IS THE. CHUPICABRA. WHERES THE SPY ISLAND. WHERE IS IT, WHERE DID YOU HIDE HER. WHERES THE PUPPY OUTFIT, THE DRACULAS. IVE BEEN MOVING FORWSRD AND YOUVE BEEN MOVING BACK
My Friend Peppa Pig
My Friend Peppa Pig
You will never be finfin (on planet teo)
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Played in march or something

Who cares.
Quest for Moomoo
Quest for Moomoo
Played december 1st

so sloppy and empty. hated this, dont lead me on with an image of a cow.
Monsters vs. Aliens
Monsters vs. Aliens
Fears to Fathom: Ironbark Lookout
Fears to Fathom: Ironbark Lookout
Dec 27th

REDDIT, AITA? i (24) was driving along, in my chungus climplets RV when i decided to stop at a diner. I went in, greeted the waitress (tipped her 50%) and then remembered: i always pees bwfore i ate! So i (24) went to the batgroom. Now, i looked at the sink twice and it distracted me so bad i forgot to close the dungus door! But i already had my pants down, and the disfunction of the sink and the door caused me to just let my urine loose all over the floor. Now, i tipped 50%, so Reddit, aita for pissing on the floor? By the way i LOVE jackspectic eye and i cant women (except sister)
Calling
Calling
Mort the Chicken
Mort the Chicken
Played july 18th:

Is mort any less of a chicken for being a hero? He saves us, the children.....he walked on water. He walked on cubes. we wouldnt be anything without his courage.
Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon
Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon
Stuart Little 3: Big Photo Adventure
Stuart Little 3: Big Photo Adventure
At my local grocery store there is a place where you could dump off children, and my mom left me there a few times while she was running errands. They had a ps2 with this and the Robots (movie) game and I played them frequently. I remember being mystified with stuarts skateboard.

Played March 27th: hildas mind is so fucked
iCarly
iCarly
That's So Raven
That's So Raven
December 20th

omg shes about to be crushed by that falling tv! but my clothes got dirrty.. life is so hard and im so yucky.... jesus fucking christ
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Pretty Princess: Magical Garden Island
Could be fun

Played sometime in june:
A pretty blatant attempt to cash in on acnh success but the tutorials were insanely long and outside of that, there wasnt much to interact with
Revenge: Jane The Killer
Revenge: Jane The Killer
Feb 2024

JANE... SHEs gonna Kill Jeff and Kidnap his brother Its Time for the Sneaking section i zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
The Tongue of Doge
The Tongue of Doge
Zero: Tsukihami no Kamen
Zero: Tsukihami no Kamen
Koikatsu Party
Koikatsu Party
Played august 8th:
My poor demented woman and her festering aerola disease suffers a grand mal seizure with every orgasm... SAD.
Buddy Simulator 1984
Buddy Simulator 1984
April 11 2024

Omg guys i just read the wikipedia page for bpd and i think i have an idea thatll finally make this undertale mario & luigi doki doki creepypastas club thing happen
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Played April 25th:

Frustrating and stupid boooooo booo....
white! White white white.....
Don't Scream
Don't Scream
Dec 7th

Interesting concept. I am excited to scream or laugh more in full release
The Visitor
The Visitor
Played may 21st:

That boy got lost in the woods and his dad did not care. Wife makes dinner and BECOMES dinner! Shit eating kid gets served, what a fail.... jpg of old woman.... jpg of troll.....
Herdy Gerdy
Herdy Gerdy
Silkbulb Test
Silkbulb Test
The Creepy Syndrome
The Creepy Syndrome
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Hopping Girl Kohane EX
Found on switch store. Looks incomprehensible.

Played April 4th:
This game appears to be overly "girly" and cute but then the main character has skimpy anime clothes and breast physics. It's a bit sad cause it could of been something.
It's my Birthday
It's my Birthday
Played may 7th:
Not my bday anymore but hilda still has birthday fun 4 everyone......
The Diner
The Diner
Played june 4th:

I go to the diner to get my diner popcorn and it is so fucking dark that i just wander around for 5 minutes and then the game ends.
Irisu Syndrome
Irisu Syndrome
Played April 2nd: hilda couldn't figure out tetris for babies and got impatient. Shame...
Silly Bandz
Silly Bandz
Teaching hilda what silly means with silly bandz

Played may 4th:
Was not expecting an angry birds clone. They didnt even look like silly bandz...
The Sopranos: Road to Respect
The Sopranos: Road to Respect
Played may 30th:
Sopranos knowledge 0 but was expecting worse. Controls like Yakuza ripping GTA's eyes out. but theres massive chest in this game WITH. NIPPLE. oh my god! Squirt.
Life of Black Tiger
Life of Black Tiger
Played august 11th:

My sweet female tiger i will kill 7 eagles and 13 buffalo and 100 wolves and a pig for you
Mario In Clock Town
Mario In Clock Town
Played april 30th:

This made me appreciate the enemy placement of normal mario a lot more
NSFW Solitaire
NSFW Solitaire
played on April 22:
this is the worst and it should not exist
Aria and the Mysterious Mushroom
Aria and the Mysterious Mushroom
Boobs Saga
Boobs Saga
Jan 12th 2024

This game LIED on its steam store page and it isnt even close to being as cool as honey select or my FAVORITE GAME Live Stream One AND Two and it was STUPID and I hated it and it was really, really, very, bad. You ARE responsible. Dont even lie to me
My Dear Brother Jeff
My Dear Brother Jeff
Played october 20th

my dear brother jeff you were in a hospital. Many laughs at your expense, tearfully tearing eyes away from boobs to finish your game. the struggles i had trying to make hilda finish this. the desperate search for distraction. jajaja

An amendment:
Finally we can understand the story of Jeffrey dahmer the killer. His mommy go crazy and is no importance. Go away. Less boobs this time but more bad words and a slur
A House for Alesa 2
A House for Alesa 2
May 30th 2023

Mr bob is hijacking the yuri car noo

At first i thought these were satirical and made by a woman cause the way these characters look are almost never referenced. And its the same in this game. But boy. You sure let us down, partner. I should of known with the yuri references.
At Your Feet
At Your Feet
Witch's Wish
Witch's Wish
Build-A-Bear Workshop
Build-A-Bear Workshop
Its Snowing
Its Snowing
Played at a point in january 2024

okay guys. so, you might think my itchio game is normal, but actually when you walk outside youll notice something wacky. Thats right, SHOES. on the ground! Ok, so thats crazy. But it wasnt crazy enough. My house? Its freaky. I go in there, and theres blood on the walls and shit! It wasnt there before oooo. But i'll go further. Freaky fucking jpg! Now youre really freaked. I cant stop myself guys.... SLAVERY. oh yeah, now thats scary.
Ms.Lemons
Ms.Lemons
YOU WILL finish ms lemons so help me god....

March 18th replayed, ms lemons is filth
Barnyard
Barnyard
I played this as a child and loved it.. should of been a red herring, with the squirting mechanic and all


Played match 26th: the game froze and she lost all her progress. NOOO.... she hated the squirtibg part she can't handle it. But oh, i can.
Stray Souls
Stray Souls
Dec 6th

ok bye martha.
Babe
Babe
Having an issue finding the rom for this game. Hilda has found "bubble bath babes" instead.

Shelved on March 17th
Hilda played it for 2 hours then gave it a lower score than fucking floigan bros what the fuck.
Mighty Beanz Pocket Puzzles
Mighty Beanz Pocket Puzzles
Played october 20th

i beamed it out of there. i got a super mighty bean. i dont wamt it.
Drool of the Killer
Drool of the Killer
Speedy Eggbert
Speedy Eggbert
Played dec 11th

oh my god he was so speedy he was so fucking speedy have you ever seen anything so fucking speedy? I dont think so
Sukutte: Save Me...
Sukutte: Save Me...
Played April 23:

I am so glad to play games with strong and courageous women in them
Under the Witch: Beginnings
Under the Witch: Beginnings
Feb 10th 2024

skip the fart scene?
Hunt Down the Freeman
Hunt Down the Freeman
Cat Go! Ultimate Challenge
Cat Go! Ultimate Challenge
I hope this is the right cat go, apparently many cats go

Played April 11th:
it went
Bob the Builder: Can We Fix It?
Bob the Builder: Can We Fix It?
Anonymous Agony
Anonymous Agony
Played august 5th:
I do not believe this game opens with a 2 hour cutscene about a very threatening man named jokester54.
Good Job!
Good Job!
Played october 11th

oh my lady, clantly boobed. Unfortunately, was your voice not annoyin. how sad.
Morphine
Morphine
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
Skull Island: Rise of Kong
Hello Kitty: Roller Rescue
Hello Kitty: Roller Rescue
Played august 7th:

I painted and hello kitty was busy rescueing. Werked her tail off in several different fits. Stopped bombs and missiles, violence and terror. All with that golden hammer.
Barbie Horse Adventures: Wild Horse Rescue
Barbie Horse Adventures: Wild Horse Rescue
Played may 18th:

This is not the right game
Floigan Bros.
Floigan Bros.
Played on March 15th

Would rather play Charlie and Chocolate Factory ps2. Wrong.
Master Spy
Master Spy
Played may 18th:
I hate this
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
3 Billion Dreams for a Forgiveness Machine
Mirror 2: Project X
Mirror 2: Project X
Discovered through a game called "novastella Island", which was apparently supposed to be an adult game that got changed into a farming sim (very obvious).

played at some point

I wasnt texting the whole time i remember everything like uhhmm ms naoki and the boobs and the mirrors and the dramaa. And that lady. And the curse. And the puzzle.
Hamtaro: Ham-Ham Games
Hamtaro: Ham-Ham Games
November 30th

I dont know if this was the one but hamtaro did a lot and spoke a lot and played dress up

This is 200th game for 200 hams

53 Comments


can't wait!!

now i feel inspired to do the same with CURSE ..... if i don't make the list... know it is happening slowly but surely

1 year ago

I'M NOT PLAYING FUCKING ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS
@Hilda what could possibly be bad about chipwrecked!!!!!
it's a ??rhythm game??? can you play with DDR pad?
it'll be fun!
Dead By Daylight and the Arthur game being added feel so mean spirited

1 year ago

I'd love to see that list but regardless I'm keeping him in my thoughts and prayers <3 but it would be very funny if you also made him play floigan bros. Although,, Hilda is my online friend so it's acceptable to spam her 24/7 with floigan threats, however I would be worried about the repercussions if I lived with them :P

1 year ago

@BEAUTIFULBRUTE Maybe someday I can convince myself to play it when I buy an adapter for my ddr pad that for my own sake hopefully doesn't work anymore
@BlazingWaters I spent years of my life in dead by daylight but some people would rather see me fall in the hole I climbed out of for so long

1 year ago

@BlazingWaters this is enrichment for Hildas (:

1 year ago

@CURSE she made it through frogger... she's trained to experience Arthur
It's funny 'cause the first three games seem at the bare minimun very fun, and then the flood gates are opened by Alvin and its friends.

I have no idea what even Mr Tomatos, and frankly, I am VERY scared to know.

1 year ago

@DemonAndGames the first 3 are some of my favorite pieces of art that I genuinely wanna show my friend here but the others are just funny lol
@moschidae <3 i understand
@Hilda ahh, well me & moschidae are the new founders of the get-hilda-an-adapter-for-ddr-pad-and-if-that-one-doesn't-work-a-whole-brand-new-one foundation. accepting sponsors

1 year ago

Buying hilda a ddr pad the SECOND I get my disability check next month

1 year ago

Buying myself a dramatically lit chair to sit in

1 year ago

we are fucking sponsored by ms. lemons !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 year ago

that arthuer and the invisibles stream was insane

1 year ago

Shoutout to Wayne, now I don't have to rummage through Wikipedia to find gems like arthur and floigan bros

1 year ago

Water Horse and Charlotte's web forever stuck in my brain. Also found out wikipedia diving that the dudes who founded the studio that made the original Shadowman, dipped and made a new studio, which then made cheap ass games, including Water Horse and Charlotte's web

1 year ago

Oh my god, im actually shocked by that. What a coincidence... Water Horse/Shadowman crossover when..?

Oh yeah, and thank you for reminding me that I need to make Hilda play Babe as well. I'm sure she'll love it (:

1 year ago

This has nothing to do with anything but they're making a Beverley Hills Chihuahua for adult straight men called Strays. i must remember it.

1 year ago

You don’t REALLY have to though…

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and I'll make you watch Strays

1 year ago

I’ll hopefully be catching some instead

1 year ago

Will Feral (changed his name for the movie) is in it. You will watch Strays.

1 year ago

You should add Wo Long I think it'd be kinda fucked up

1 year ago

Keep talking like that and someone is getting locked in the cupboard again ! Or put into a jar.

1 year ago

A worthy sacrifice for a mere cupboard

1 year ago

Does anyone else have any more bad game recommendations that are short-ish. I'm running out of ideas.

1 year ago

How short?

1 year ago

Uhhh like, 2 hours or less preferably
Barbie secret agent because CURS wouldn’t finish it when i tried to make em play even though he almost beat it !!!!!!!


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