Twennytoo Five Hundo
In future year AD2022 I apparently logged 500 video games (mostly just played, not finished - can you even imagine). Am I proud of it? Of course not, brother, pride is a sin. Here they are in their entirety in order of play:
500 Games
It's Warriors Orochi, it's good. I think this one isn't quite up to the same level of 3 Ultimate, but you're still guaranteed a fun time. The designs of the new characters are very funny to me - stupid sexy Hades!
Probably a little overlong for what it is, but this is a solid GBA game.
Played under the name Vendetta. Konami's first real pretty good effort. OTGing people is good and punching people's fingers so they lose grip and fall off the stage: great.
Replay. I finished this as a kid and remember thinking it was cool. Adult me is less enamored with it.
Really cool just how many combinations of your team are possible. This kicked my ass and then I read the review on here about difficulty scaling with credits. Absolutely fiendish.
A throwback to Renegade, so not something I really want to bother with.
Another kind of drudgy SNK effort but worth a look for KOF history reasons.
It's fine, but I'm not really sure why it exists. What reason is there for not just putting all these characters into Warriors Orochi instead?
This shifted between regular respawning and moving back to checkpoints on death, which was very annoying!
Just a very average game. Apparently a Playstation launch title in Japan? Only thing really notable about it.
Not quite as strong a game as some of Capcom's other heavy hitters on this list, but man, I wish they still made games that looked like this.
Completely terrible. There ought to be a law against shit like this.
Nothing like the PS2 game, but a lot like a whole bunch of garbage beatemups. Don't bother with it.
Replay. Fucking hell, man. Just one of the most tedious games ever made.
I don't really remember anything about this, but I shelved it, so I must have thought it was decent enough to go back to at some point.
Rival Turf 2 - still bad.
A weird one. A dungeon crawl-brawler, it seemed pretty interesting but I feel like I must have missed something with the combat. Surely can't be as basic as it seemed to me?
Copen's gameplay is switched up to make him more melee-focused and he loses some of his movement options. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. Definitely a step down from the first game, but I like Brigade's design.
Interesting as a weird curiosity - a beatemup spinoff of House of the Dead - but otherwise not much to enjoy here. I do like that they threw in a Yusaku Matsuda-inspired guy for no reason.
The first PS2 game iterated on slightly, i.e. very good. You should play these!
Only got this partly working from what I remember. Whatever, it's Renegade, I didn't care.
What came out in the West as Shatterhand. Movement is a bit weird but you punch everything, including bullets, and that is cool. Good music too!
If I had a list of games I desperately wish would get translated, this is on it. An endearingly silly love letter to tokusatsu hero shows. When you create your hero you enter their name and it comes up as a big logo! Anything you put in! Wow!
Better than Guardian Heroes, although I didn't finish it at the time. I remember thinking the combo system was actually pretty good. Will get back to it.
Pretty good from what I remember!
Fine I guess, but it can be really hard to make out what's actually going on in these polygonal ones.
Impressive amount of playable characters by the end of the game but otherwise not really all that great, I thought.
Mainly played this port to hear the music. Sadly not as good as I was hoping, but this version also has a bunch of low-rent cutscenes where the Brothers Lee are Kenshiro clones with turn of the 90s anime hair. Dope.
Another Guardian Heroes-alike. I don't think I'm into these, sorry!
Replay. Loved this game as a kid and still enjoyed it here. It's very basic and enemy variety is nonexistent but it just feels good to hit stuff and it's colourful! Great music too. OK, GO!
The kind of FMV game I do not like.
Another good Cave game. It's no Ketsui, though!
I feel like your ship moves a little too slowly and your hurtbox is massive.
Had this game in progress for literal years, finally made the effort to finish it this year. It's fine for a short choose your own adventure type thing, don't really have all that much to say about it.
Another NES platformer that wasn't very good. Think I was playing these because they had translations.
I really wanted to like this, but it's too slow. Put Sonic Blast Man in a better game please.
I've played all of 10 minutes of this so far, can't say anything.
Looks great, plays bad. Tale as old as time.
Not terrible, but the SNK stuff always feels like it's behind the curve even at this relatively early stage.
A lot of bright, creative designs but the gameplay is very basic. Can't hate though, fun name to say.
When you're sufficiently powered up in this one, anything flying up close behind you gets annihilated by engine wash. I think more shmups should do this.
More of the same from Die Hard Arcade, and I'm perfectly fine with that.
Level design is more straightforward (blander) than the Gunvolt games but it's still really fun because Copen. Designs of the girls are still prison sentence bait.
Rival Turf 3 continues the legacy of the Rival Turf name (being bad).
Okay, by this point I'd played a bunch that were better so it didn't do that much for me.
Replay. Nowhere near as bad as TMNT or The Simpsons - when you punch something it actually feels like you punched it - but it still features Konami doing their credit-stealing best to take your money. Colossus roar rules though.
I've got no problems with avoiding this particular turf altogether. Stinks.
More of the same. The cover art for these is really cool though, right?
A little too samey throughout but it's cool that they tried it. They managed to make the mechs feel really big and heavy, and of course Blodia is just a cool design. Glad they reused it.
Okay idea but I don't think EDF gameplay needed streamlining. Also pretty racist!
Can't really remember it, just know I didn't finish it.
Konami's best effort by a country mile, probably because it's just a Final Fight remake in all but name. Super punchy and satisfying to play, absolutely awesome soundtrack accompanies the carnage. Buy me Violent Storm or go to hell!
Kind of cool, but just a little too annoying for me.
Replay. Superseded by the remakes but this is still okay. Obviously the music rules.
Started this whilst I was on a bit of a Holmes kick from watching some of the Jeremy Brett series. I cooled off but I'll get back to it eventually!
I think the release of this I played might have had a different title but that's the only thing I recall of it.
Not really into the style of it but it plays pretty well! Was surprised at this one.
Weird that this exists but I think Capcom should do more daft things like it. I cannot forgive how they made Vega look in this, though.
A much worse NES platformer that I played for the license.
Has the same problem of being visually unremarkable that 3 has, but I was actually able to finish this one, so that means it's great, excellent, etc.
Chills when they hit "of the HIGHEST POWERS"
Not amazing but a pretty charming little game. Parrying blaster bolts back will always be fun.
More Gunvolt Burst. It's still easy, still fine to zip through if you have 20 minutes.
I finished this one but am totally blanking on anything about it.
Fairly standard beatemup but the Conan aesthetic is very strong here. Has that one great track that's in Taiko as well.
Another game where if I'd played it at the time I would probably love it, but now just doesn't really hold my attention.
Not really a kart racer guy but this seemed decent enough. Did you know Yoshinori Ono of SF4 fame was the composer for this? Crazy!
Now this is how you do an arena brawler, Renegade! Silly and fun. Bouncing someone's head off the concrete as an OTG attack is extremely satisfying. "The Slash Skate Screamers" is an incredible name for a gang.
Metal Slug-ish. Not as good as any of those but still okay!
Pretty standard shmup but with all kinds of weird cyberspace environments and enemies, it's really cool. The cutscenes where the main character enters cyberspace are the good stuff. The final boss of this game is Cyber-Hitler's skull, which has skeletal spider legs.
Decidedly less cool.
Licensed game for an instant noodles brand. I would like this to be good but it's extremely basic.
Has that high-quality Irem look but I remember it feeling really slow.
Sadly nowhere near as good as the original Revenge.
Just okay. By this point I'd definitely cemented that I preferred Cave to Psikyo.
Fun point-and-click that has a bunch of sections where you'll have to do some googling about real-world locations and history. I like when games do that kind of thing!
Okay I don't remember this one.
There's something I can never quite put my finger on about 3DS platformers. They always feel like they have pretty similar physics to them, and I don't think those feel particularly good. Didn't jive with this but you could probably do worse.
This, D.D. Crew and DJ Boy form an unholy triumvirate of terror.
Don't remember anything about it, but I didn't finish it so I must not have liked it, which is disappointing for a game called Karate Blazers.
Cool idea that doesn't quite come together. I can't say I've read Mazin Saga; maybe it's the same!
This is a Troll game. As in the little pencil toppers with the hair. That's all I remember about it.
The kind of TV show adaptation game we deserve more of - missions are presented like episodes of the show, you get the little title stings, the eyecatches, all of it (The Space Sheriff Spirits is also very good for this stuff). Gameplay-wise it's an otherwise unremarkable TPS but if you like VOTOMs you will probably get a kick out this for a while. You skate about, it does the noise. Mission accomplished.
A game you need a pencil and paper for. Or a pen. Just something that writes, really.
I don't think I really got this one. Might need to replay.
I'd probably be interested in checking out some of the later Gradius games, but this one didn't do much for me.
Don't have much to say about this other than I think I appreciate this style of dungeon crawler more than I actually enjoy playing them.
This is what I wish wizards in movies and stuff were like. Just firing huge amounts of magic shit at everyone constantly. Doing a highest level Dragon's Dogma spell 50 times a minute. ZAP
Another free PS+ game. Serviceable beatemup, it's way longer than it needs to be but the combat is decent and I had replayed Sifu a few days before so I was in the mood for more kung fu.
The two-lane gimmick mostly helps with making the game quicker because you can avoid stuff. I think it being a not-terrible Power Rangers game did a lot of the heavy lifting for me.
Very easy Mega Man clone. I'd seen people say that Beck is hard mode, and I guess he is in relative terms, because I replayed this later in the year as Gunvolt and I could probably have done it with my eyes closed.
From what I remember this was the sequel to Sorcer Striker? Hasn't really stuck in the mind much for me. Dimahoo is a very fun name to say though. Dimahoo, Dimahoo, Dimahoo!
I feel that I have nothing but hate in my heart for Kunio-kun and his dumb little buddies.
Very cool setting but otherwise a slog to play. Might start specifically calling this the SNK Style.
Horrendous. Avoid.
Indiana Jones shoots hordes of animal poachers and also an alien (?). I dunno, I think this game is pretty cool!
Same story, just can't match up to the main games.
Kinda-sorta wearing a management game skin, but really this is a choose your own adventure book. I got the best ending though, so hooray!
I remember this being fairly basic but fun. A lot of these PC-Engine games have good music that is totally overpowered by loud, bad SFX.
Wanted to replay the Blade Runner game after watching some Trancers and gave this a go. Decided it just looked a bit too weird at higher res/framerate and dropped it to go back to the original.
4 Comments
Damn this is impressive
Did you complete Ring Fit?!
@Vee this took me days lol
@Dalaamclouds that's not the word I'd use but thank you!
@letshugbro good lord no. new years resolution though!
@Dalaamclouds that's not the word I'd use but thank you!
@letshugbro good lord no. new years resolution though!
Vee
1 year ago
Bayou Billy is one of the most unfun NES games I ever played, goddamn what a slog-filled and mean-spirited game.