I wanted to vent a bit here. Apologies for not really making any reviews and just kind of only making lists for the past while. Been really depressed the past two months and been having issues with basically anything as of late. My mood has just been at a whole new low and have basically no friends irl. Barely even talk to people, usually about 3, sometimes 4 daily. Otherwise I just can barely even want to say hi to anyone else because I don't know them well at all or I'm too worried of being annoying. I'm also getting pretty poor due to my stupidity. Sorry for all the sad news but if I'm just not on here much, don't worry I still exists. Just hard to do much nowadays. Might make some more lists, maybe might play a couple of games idk. Just hate keeping quiet, I'll stop rambling now.

I think I speak for everyone when I say that you don't need to apologize at all. Don't feel pressured to do anything and take as much as time as you need. Things will get better, if when it doesn't seem like it, they always do.

Oh, and also; no voice is atrocious, if you really want to make video reviews, don't let that thought dissuade you, 'cause it's a self-perception that isn't true. Just go for it, and have fun :)

Sorry to hear about that - as someone who's having a relatively shitty 2023 I know some days all you can do is keep your head about the water and that's fine. And if you eventually decide to do any video reviews - no pressure though! - then do post them on here 'cause I'm sure more than a few of us would be interested!

*above the water (I can't type)

sorry about all you're going through. As someone who spent most of her life not having friends, my best advice would be to go out of your way to try to make some you feel comfortable with. It really does change your life having someone there for you. Its hard to do that though if youre not at peace with yourself, so just keep that in mind. Wish all the best to you

Thank you for the comments. I really appreciate them.

If it means anything, I hated my voice as well but someone close to me has said I sounded cute at least twice. We're our own worst judges.

It sounds like you're going through a bad spot and don't feel like you have anywhere to direct that frustration other than yourself. It's a horrible position to be in! I'm really sorry that's happening and I hope you find your way through soon. If you're anything like me (and basically everyone) you're probably being way harder on yourself than you deserve. When you're isolated it can be hard to keep that kind of perspective.

If you have any family member or friend who you can talk to, now is the time to lean on them! I know it can feel like you don't deserve to be listened to, and who would want to sit there and hear all your petty problems. But you and your future happiness are absolutely worth it and people might surprise you. If there's really no one, I'd just echo what moschidae said and recommend putting yourself out there as painful and as awkward as it might feel right now. I really think that just having someone on your side will go a long way.

Also I only know a few but from my experience every trans woman hates her voice at some point. I know that doesn't help but know you're far from alone at least. As oppressive as all this stuff feels I believe you will get through this and you will be a happy person, you just have a shitty hand of cards you have to get through. You can do this! <3

Earlier this year I was in a similar position, and I cannot pretend I have gotten to a point where I completely adore my voice, but just a couple of months of vocal training and using that voice in everyday conversations got me to a point where I was far happier with it than ever. And now I've been using it frequently for months and it feels okay! It was really scary and intense to use my voice and I absolutely hated it. I still have some trouble with it, but if you can push past that fear, you can absolutely get yourself in a position where you're okay with your voice.

I'm sure many other people have recommended it but I used TransVoiceLessons to learn. At the end of the day "vocal training" was a somewhat misleading title for me because the truth is that most of the training I ended up doing was by talking to friends, loved ones, and other people I'd meet. It was barely training and moreso just application. But the courage to do that is half of the battle. The courage to try and change your voice was so hard to get over. Finding the courage to use my early attempts at a feminine voice with friends and family was terrifying.

But I seriously, truly believe that getting over that hurdle has made me feel so much happier. Sending you so much love and hoping you feel better from all of this <3. Good luck on your journey <3 <3 <3

Once again I do appreciate the supportive comments. I hate not saying much but it does mean a lot.