Twennytoo Five Hundo

In future year AD2022 I apparently logged 500 video games (mostly just played, not finished - can you even imagine). Am I proud of it? Of course not, brother, pride is a sin. Here they are in their entirety in order of play:

I think the release of this I played might have had a different title but that's the only thing I recall of it.
Another one I don't remember anything of. Sorry!
I like to catch Pokemon and also evolve them. Held together by spit and hope, but it was pretty fun!
Not interested at all in Overwatch and its ilk but I gave this a go because it's Gundam. Looking down ironsights? In a Gundam game? You're having a laugh mate. Also if someone picks the suit I want I can't pick it? Seriously? Is this what these games are like? I thought we solved this shit in Champion Edition. Absurd.
Wasn't too keen on where this one ended up but it's an interesting take on FMV games nonetheless. I would watch all of the movies in it.
Hilariously edgy and kind of janky but it has that same fun quality of a Hotline Miami where positioning, prioritisation and full use of all your tools pays off big. Also very satisfying in its scrambliness when you don't do any of those and are just using everything around you on the fly.
What a game. Max Payne's Pro Skater. When you hit your groove and are actually doing well, you feel like the coolest motherfucker in the world. Very good idea to rip off Rollerball wholesale, because Rollerball is definitely cool in concept, but is mostly pretty boring outside of the actual match scenes. Very glad I played this!
Fun throwback shooter - I'd never heard of it but a friend said hey, you might like this and they were right. Nice!
Not sure what's going on here. Gunvolt is a furry character now? And you don't actually play as him outside of a super mode? And Copen is gone? Hmm. Think I'll go back to 2.
Wanted to replay the Blade Runner game after watching some Trancers and gave this a go. Decided it just looked a bit too weird at higher res/framerate and dropped it to go back to the original.
Pretty decent game! An oddity in that it's very clearly trying to ape the SNK/KOF look - not really something I associate with the genre. It's pretty basic, but short and sweet, worth playing if you can grab it cheap. You may also notice that this is the fourth game of this genre on the list so far that has Genzoman cover art. There can be too much of a good thing.
Not really that into it. Not bad, but not very interesting either. Fast forward for cutscenes is good, but a skip button would be even better.
Easily the best Turtles beatemup, just brimming with personality. Went through singleplayer and with four players and had an absolute blast. Best OST of the year easily as well.
Disappointing. I like the concept but the gameplay is just clunky and dull, and the story didn't really end up anywhere I liked either. I guess I'm glad hokey FMV guff is still getting made though.
I liked The Stanley Parable. This was more of that. I liked it!
I've played all of 10 minutes of this so far, can't say anything.
Fun point-and-click that has a bunch of sections where you'll have to do some googling about real-world locations and history. I like when games do that kind of thing!
It's LEGO Star Wars. It's fine! You run around doing simple things, you chuckle at the deserved light ribbing it gives these movies.
Not really into the style of it but it plays pretty well! Was surprised at this one.
DIdn't like it. Open world just felt dull and full of copy-pasted stuff. Wasn't fussed about the story. Saying "wretched dung-eater" is funny but that's all I've got.
The current era of KOF just isn't for me. XIV and XV feel like they're trying to carry on the Big Combo Game style of XIII, but combos in these games are just not nearly as cool or interesting. Feels like they want you to go down very specific predefined combo routes. I could watch, say, Marvel 3 footage now and there's a solid chance I'll see something I've never seen before; it doesn't feel like this can happen with current KoF. Also this game is ugly as hell. At least there's always 98!
The good shit. Easy pick for my GOTY. Have went back to it all throughout the year, some of these new goal and costume unlock requirements are total murder.
Copen's gameplay is switched up to make him more melee-focused and he loses some of his movement options. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. Definitely a step down from the first game, but I like Brigade's design.
Played for 10 minutes and refunded it. If I want to waste my time I've a million other pointless games and they let me press an attack button.
The bad kind of FMV game and also barely functional. The cheek of them to act like this is some unearthed classic of the genre.
I've only played up to the initial reveal - it seems cool but I'd rather play it on PC.
Absolutely not the first game I played this year but the earliest one logged for 2022. Haven't finished it yet; it seems nice enough but just takes a bit longer than I would like.
Same story, sitting for ages, finally finished. I didn't like this nearly as much as the original but ate up all the first game fanservice like a champ, so it's all good by me.
Started this in 2021 but got around to finishing it in 2022. I like the new cel-shaded look but I'd rather play SW4-II. A little too light on character variety. Shikanosuke Yamanaka is very dreamy!
Tried this out because I thought the combat would be enough to see me through, but it's not really that good and it would have to be very good to help me power through all this Latest Anime Season guff.
Was free on PS+ so I grabbed it. Looks great but plays exactly like the Master System version, i.e. horribly. Can see no point in it.
Replay. This isn't a good release, but the core gameplay of VF5FS is great, so if you have no other access to FS you should get this. Can't say enough good things about Veef.
Barely out of the tutorial. Need to get back to it.
Didn't blow me away but it's fine. I'll play it a bit more at some point.
Finally, a SotN clone that includes one of the most important aspects of SotN: the Alucard Strut. Look at that walk animation! Hell yeah!
Short and sweet, it's a little on the easier side but you could do a lot worse.
A cool idea, little puzzle game FPS. You could do worse for a free game.
Cool game, very hard. This and the first one make me laugh a lot because you've got all these folk who have been facecapped so you can go oh wow that's Naoto Takenaka! And then you've got William who has proper Koei Face.
Replay. Originally played it on PS5, finally grabbed it on PC so I have all the levels from 1 and 2 as well. The whole trilogy is just really good - I'm glad they shifted towards a more spy thriller-like world. Also some of the funniest games released in the last few years; every time Tobias Rieper speaks at length I crack up.
Replay. Couldn't stand this game when it came out, can't stand the franchise in general. Anamanaguchi can also go away.
Okay idea but I don't think EDF gameplay needed streamlining. Also pretty racist!
Kinda-sorta wearing a management game skin, but really this is a choose your own adventure book. I got the best ending though, so hooray!
Has some charm to it but the combat was just too bland for me to want to finish it. Maybe one day.
Feel like I missed some controversy over this maybe? Had never heard of it but it showed up on an itch.io page I was on so I gave it a bash. Played it for 10 minutes and don't see myself ever going back to it.
Haven't played any of the other games in this series but I didn't expect this to be as linear as it is. I guess it's okay but I can't say I was too impressed.
Another free PS+ game. Serviceable beatemup, it's way longer than it needs to be but the combat is decent and I had replayed Sifu a few days before so I was in the mood for more kung fu.
Better than the previous one, I think. I'd be willing to play more of these.
It was free, which is fitting because after playing I can tell you that this game is worthless.
Sublime remake package. I've played this so much this year. THPS gameplay has aged like a fine wine.
Wanted to like this, but I just found it kind of obnoxious, and I don't think it's a particularly good beatemup. Disappointing.
Free on PS+. I don't follow the UFC (a friend of mine refers to it as a putrid cretin spectacle and I may be forced to agree), and maybe that's just as well cause if I did I'd have ended up wasting my money on this. Series peaked with Undisputed 3, all downhill from there.
Got a couple of levels in before deciding I couldn't be holed at the minute. I'll get back to it at some point.
Chills when they hit "of the HIGHEST POWERS"
Some decent moments to build up the tension in this, and the subject matter is mildly interesting, but there's not really much else to say about it. It does get a bit on the nose with the "CIA bad" message at points, but well, yeah, they are bad, sure!
Played the original and thought it was boring as hell. In years since I've seen a lot of people talk about how good it was, so I thought I might not have given it a fair shake before and tried this out. I was right the first time.
Good game. "Mood" stuff is usually thin gruel to me but taking photos of stuff is fun and this gives you a lot of options for taking photos, so I like it. Good soundtrack, good look. The first level of the DLC openly lifts from Johnny Mnemonic, so is very cool.
I'm not really sure who this is for.
Replay. This close to being a perfect videogame. It really is just stupidly good. Play it now if you haven't already!
Can't stand turn-based JRPG combat unless it's tactics style, so I thought this would finally be my in as it looked like it had some charm and was an action hybrid. The combat is just too basic for me though and you can really tell the whole thing is a remake of a SNES game. Abysmal dialogue as well. I got a fair bit in so I'll maybe finish it at some point, but woof.
I have no love whatsoever for FFVII. This was free on PS+, so I decided to see if things would be different after nearly 20 years and a different combat system. Nope! I think I might like this even less.
Only just getting round to playing this now with the full release. It's Warband but more, which is fine!
Thought this might be cool but as soon as I saw the battle system I nope'd straight out. Not in the market for turn-based beatemups, sorry.
It's Panzer Dragoon, it's fine, but it's always a little weird to me to play these remakes with modern graphics but unchanged gameplay. Always just feels slightly off.
Oh, this is just Beatmania. Well cool, I like Beatmania! Also I'm terrible at Beatmania!
Cool game! Doesn't scare me at all, which is maybe not a good thing, but I like Junji Ito and have always been vaguely intrigued by Uninvited, so the game's style works for me.
Avoided this for ages because of the shift to JRPG combat, finally gave it a go since it was free on PS+ and confirmed my fears. Just don't enjoy it at all. The battle UI looks insanely cheap as well.
I liked ESP Ra.De. enough to buy this. Some tweaks, more content, fine by me!
It's Warriors Orochi, it's good. I think this one isn't quite up to the same level of 3 Ultimate, but you're still guaranteed a fun time. The designs of the new characters are very funny to me - stupid sexy Hades!
Another unfinished. A PS4 game that is clearly in reality a PS3 game. A theme song can only carry a game so far. Combat just doesn't have the oomph you want from a mech game and I'll be honest, I don't know how people can play these kinds of dating sim-adjacent things without feeling horribly embarrassed at every moment.
Had this game in progress for literal years, finally made the effort to finish it this year. It's fine for a short choose your own adventure type thing, don't really have all that much to say about it.
A throwback to Renegade, so not something I really want to bother with.
Why does this game look like this? Who put them up to it?
Fuckin hell
Level design is more straightforward (blander) than the Gunvolt games but it's still really fun because Copen. Designs of the girls are still prison sentence bait.
Started it but barely got any way in before I got distracted by other things. I've enjoyed every Ys I've played and can't imagine this one will buck the trend.
Played this to test out an Apple TV I had to get for work. Thoroughly depressing.
I have nothing but disdain for this. Genuinely repellent to me.
I was having fun with this, but my save messed up and I haven't gone back to it yet.
Did the Golden Deer route. Tooooo long for what it is. Not bothered about most of the characters either. I liked Awakening well enough but I don't think I have it in me to play Fire Emblem regularly.
A good remake of the good remake. Japanese title is better.
Replay. Never finished it originally so I restarted and went through it. It's fine since it really is just trying as hard as it can to be a SotN clone, but as is the case with every SotN clone, it's not as good as SotN.
Gave this a go because I've been interested in seeing the Tsui Hark film. Not really all that much to it and environments felt quite drab to me. Worse ways to spend the time though.
Replay. I'd started this aaaages ago and gave it another bash this year. It's very impressive, but there really is only so much you can do with Skyrim. It's a great effort but it's just not built on a good base.
Another PS+ game. I guess I don't mind Minecraft, but I haven't put much time into this because it keeps trying to get me to do story stuff that I don't care about.
Still sitting unfinished. A cool look and concept but the race gameplay feels a bit sparse. I'll get round to it eventually.
I'm just confused that this was made and released. Did nobody involved know they were making a crap game? Who was it meant to please?
A game you need a pencil and paper for. Or a pen. Just something that writes, really.
I started this but then realised I could get the Ultimate version instead. Whoops!
Played a bit of the first game in this reboot series and decided it was very Not For Me, but I gave this a bash after seeing it go for dirt cheap and enjoyed it a lot more. Maybe due to all the actual tomb raiding/adventure stuff in it. Avoiding ancient temple deathtraps: fun! Who knew! The bit where Lara Croft gives in to her Dark Passenger is funny, though sadly I think you're meant to take it very seriously.
First half is a fun Ninja Gaiden clone, although nowhere near as hard. Second half is a really boring Metroidvania. Fun game that turned into a horrendous slog.
This game can fuck right off. Honestly.
Meanwhile, a Castlevania 3 clone. Also fine. Good music!
Cool little idea. I like games with boats.
Replay. I think this game is cool although it's often an absolute chore to play. If it was half as long it'd be great.
Why does THIS game look like this? Who put THEM up to it?
It's really fun that a game devoted to a mainstay Italian cinema duo exists, and it looks really good, but the gameplay could never be accused of being deep. Whole bunch of beatemups like this.
More Gunvolt Burst. It's still easy, still fine to zip through if you have 20 minutes.
Definitely has more effort put into it than a bunch of the other licensed musous but I will never understand why they keep removing the ability to jump from these.
Cool stuff here, almost rhythm-game like. Some of the bosses can be frustrating but I had a good time with it.
Mechanically fine but the style just isn't my thing.
A good take on the formula laid down by the D&D games. Just went on a bit too long for me at the time, but I want to get back to it.

4 Comments


1 year ago

I adore the dedication to adding notes to everything, even if they're just like two words. Hachoo sweep.

Bayou Billy is one of the most unfun NES games I ever played, goddamn what a slog-filled and mean-spirited game.

1 year ago

Damn this is impressive

1 year ago

Did you complete Ring Fit?!

1 year ago

@Vee this took me days lol
@Dalaamclouds that's not the word I'd use but thank you!
@letshugbro good lord no. new years resolution though!


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